Lied - Would you expose her???

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Mon, 23 Aug 2010 01:20:09 GMT

Brenda10 — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 01:20:09 GMT

Like swimmers they have to practice almost every day (May be except weekend) so as to perform well. How to believe that they never practice and yet can always break record?

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Mon, 23 Aug 2010 01:11:52 GMT

tweet — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 01:11:52 GMT

Erm, I thought this is the most common type of people? During my school days, there would be some who claimed that they didn’t have time to study, sure fail etc… Then it turned out they always topped the class. And from certain sources, these were the very ones who secretly requested for past year papers/notes from seniors and mugged away for exams …

[/quote]

I understand nowadays that these people are called "closet Muggers",commonly used in JC to label classmates.

Rgds

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Mon, 23 Aug 2010 01:08:46 GMT

KingRascal — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 01:08:46 GMT

It definitely appears to me as \"un-coordinated\"...the child seems to be very innocent and tells us everything. I'm still waiting for that moment...but she could have warned him to stay \"hush-hush\"

since then as well.

Something else happened after that that allows me to conclude more about the parent's competitive nature. But I think I shall not update any further as it could be sensitive if she reads this website too and...

It's a personal choice that one makes for his/her children. So long as we know what we want we would not be swayed or influenced by how others are grooming their children. Of course at times we do feel a little sad when we see our child not doing as well as the rest due to difference in their training commitment, we have to do our part to cultivate the right mindset in my child to understand and to cope with the situation with the right frame of mind.

And I have always tell him to let me know when he's ready to take on more. I would not force him in this aspect.

maisy:
KingRascal:
Thought her act was pretty foolish as her child is bound to blurt it out some day...
Hmmm I would have thought that for superKiasu parents like that, they would have made every attempt to \"condition the child\" what to say & what not to say...
And usually such children , constantly under such intensed pressure by their parents to outperform themselves & to watch what they say, do become very withdrawn & quiet...so chances are they may not blurt it out but instead \"bottle it up\" or they may only share it with a close friend. Very sad but i believe it happens.

Have you noticed if the child has become quieter?

BTW, can i kaypoh? is this sport swimming? no need to answer if not convenient. Like I said, I was kaypoh-ing only

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Mon, 23 Aug 2010 00:58:07 GMT

KingRascal — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 00:58:07 GMT

Have PM you...

maisy:
KingRascal:
Thought her act was pretty foolish as her child is bound to blurt it out some day...
Hmmm I would have thought that for superKiasu parents like that, they would have made every attempt to \"condition the child\" what to say & what not to say...
And usually such children , constantly under such intensed pressure by their parents to outperform themselves & to watch what they say, do become very withdrawn & quiet...so chances are they may not blurt it out but instead \"bottle it up\" or they may only share it with a close friend. Very sad but i believe it happens.

Have you noticed if the child has become quieter?

BTW, can i kaypoh? is this sport swimming? no need to answer if not convenient. Like I said, I was kaypoh-ing only

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Sun, 22 Aug 2010 12:12:32 GMT

Joy — Sun, 22 Aug 2010 12:12:32 GMT

Personally I will not expose the lies…Let them be.

We are not paid to give them a free tuitions as in lesson in life.

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Sun, 22 Aug 2010 11:19:59 GMT

maisy — Sun, 22 Aug 2010 11:19:59 GMT

KingRascal:
Thought her act was pretty foolish as her child is bound to blurt it out some day...

Hmmm I would have thought that for superKiasu parents like that, they would have made every attempt to \"condition the child\" what to say & what not to say...
And usually such children , constantly under such intensed pressure by their parents to outperform themselves & to watch what they say, do become very withdrawn & quiet...so chances are they may not blurt it out but instead \"bottle it up\" or they may only share it with a close friend. Very sad but i believe it happens.

Have you noticed if the child has become quieter?

BTW, can i kaypoh? is this sport swimming? no need to answer if not convenient. Like I said, I was kaypoh-ing only

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Sun, 22 Aug 2010 11:07:50 GMT

maisy — Sun, 22 Aug 2010 11:07:50 GMT

chamonix:

Studying hard secretly (or privately) is definitely not a problem. The problematic ones are those that mugged secretly but went around telling others there's no need to study etc.

So true!!! I had my fair share of such encounters when i was studying (even up to university level, we still have such liars around)

People who tell you \"it's ok . i am failing this subject too\" or \"no need to mug over this chapter as I had checked w lecturer & lecturer hinted this is not a \"hot topic\" \" .....

End up topic came out and they aced.... Congratulations to them!

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 15:21:23 GMT

kiddo — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 15:21:23 GMT

auntieM:
fussyMummy:
nowadays.. how many are really sincere? :?

Very well said fussyMummy.. ...
At least in KSP you can get more 'real' info.. ...

Bravo who say KiasuParents.com is kiasu :rahrah: :rahrah: :rahrah:

parents are children First teacher....................

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 14:58:40 GMT

Fettuccine — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 14:58:40 GMT

fussyMummy:
nowadays.. how many are really sincere? :?

Yeah, you got a point. But have lah, not all friends are bad eggs hehe. I am thankful I still have a circle of friends who are sincere. The case I talked about, is exceptional. Never met anyone else like that before.

Most of my buddies, from 20 years to mums of my kids' friends, are all truthful at heart. Nothing much to lie about...:-)

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 14:49:28 GMT

Fettuccine — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 14:49:28 GMT

chamonix:
KingRascal:
Thought her act was pretty foolish as her child is bound to blurt it out some day...

To me, there is a difference between secrecy and deception. Our children are observing each and every of our acts. We have to ensure that we are setting a right standard for them to follow.
Studying hard secretly (or privately) is definitely not a problem. The problematic ones are those that mugged secretly but went around telling others there's no need to study etc.

Those parents I know, haha, they don't even remember which (lie) version they have shared. I have learned to let them go and laugh over them with my hubby or friends.
Fettuccine:

I thought I must be nuts to verify with someone over her claims. But lo and behold, she did lied. She had been very selfish, and I had my common expectation as she is a close confidante. That pretty much draws the line across. Anyway, I communicate less with her, and now feel so much merrier for being a lesser fool)
Don't fret yourself over such incidents. Simply not worth the effort.

No lah, did not fret much, very busy with three kids and still have to share info with people so selfish. Anyway, her kid/other people exposed her lies. I just quietly understood \"Oh...so that's whats going on\". No offence

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 05:54:15 GMT

auntieM — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 05:54:15 GMT

fussyMummy:
nowadays.. how many are really sincere? :?

Very well said fussyMummy.. ...
At least in KSP you can get more 'real' info.. ...

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 05:27:00 GMT

fussyMummy — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 05:27:00 GMT

nowadays.. how many are really sincere? :?

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 01:20:58 GMT

KingRascal — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 01:20:58 GMT

Hey!! I was like that and still am if I find a friend sincere...except with one mum whose child is the same class as mine. I was really free in sharing everything. Until one fine day when I discovered she withheld information from me despite my asking. I woke up since then when it comes to sharing with her.

hquek:
I will smile and know in my heart what kind of person she is. She could be insecure etc, but really there is no reason to lie.

I used to share information and tips freely with a friend. But got frustrated when this is a one way street. Anything I ask her, she'll return with a mono-syllable. Have learnt my lesson also and not be so kp to share info with others easily....only exception is in ksp lah - I still blah out when I think something's good.

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 01:17:36 GMT

duriz — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 01:17:36 GMT

Good job in keeping your peace and not exposing her, KingRascal.

Not such a rascal afterall :celebrate:

God give us strength to be good people and not to mess too much. And please help people (try to) be as truthful as possible and may those who lie outwardly and lie about their lying have diarrhea in the MRT

Just kidding (which part, you decide)

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 01:10:08 GMT

hquek — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 01:10:08 GMT

I will smile and know in my heart what kind of person she is. She could be insecure etc, but really there is no reason to lie.

I used to share information and tips freely with a friend. But got frustrated when this is a one way street. Anything I ask her, she'll return with a mono-syllable. Have learnt my lesson also and not be so kp to share info with others easily....only exception is in ksp lah - I still blah out when I think something's good.

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 00:51:29 GMT

tankee — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 00:51:29 GMT

Off hand I could think of a few possible reason why she is hiding that fact

- she is afraid of being chided for being kiasu
- if her son performed well, people might say it is due to the extra trainings and not that her son is good
- if her son did badly, people laughed that she waste her money on talentless child

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Wed, 18 Aug 2010 00:21:21 GMT

KingRascal — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 00:21:21 GMT

Nah, I’d not take any action already. Hehe, just wonder if there’d be this moment whereby her child blurted that out in front of the whole group of parents!:-):-)

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Tue, 17 Aug 2010 15:52:37 GMT

metz — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 15:52:37 GMT

KingRascal:
Thought her act was pretty foolish as her child is bound to blurt it out some day...

To me, there is a difference between secrecy and deception. Our children are observing each and every of our acts. We have to ensure that we are setting a right standard for them to follow.

Studying hard secretly (or privately) is definitely not a problem. The problematic ones are those that mugged secretly but went around telling others there's no need to study etc.

Those parents I know, haha, they don't even remember which (lie) version they have shared. I have learned to let them go and laugh over them with my hubby or friends.

Fettuccine:

I thought I must be nuts to verify with someone over her claims. But lo and behold, she did lied. She had been very selfish, and I had my common expectation as she is a close confidante. That pretty much draws the line across. Anyway, I communicate less with her, and now feel so much merrier for being a lesser fool)

Don't fret yourself over such incidents. Simply not worth the effort.

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Tue, 17 Aug 2010 15:25:27 GMT

Fettuccine — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 15:25:27 GMT

KingRascal:
Thought her act was pretty foolish as her child is bound to blurt it out some day...

To me, there is a difference between secrecy and deception. Our children are observing each and every of our acts. We have to ensure that we are setting a right standard for them to follow.

I could not agree more with you, KingRascal. It really doesn't matter how hard they are secretly working but to me, being deceptive and competitive to someone you know is really ungracious, or should I say unscrupulous.

Sorry for using such harsh words, but I have an acquaintance who is deceptive as well. She is someone I trusted, whom all her questions I left not unanswered. I gave her tips when she asked and shared information. However, like you said our children are observing our every acts. One day, her child \"exposed\" her lies.

I thought I must be nuts to verify with someone over her claims. But lo and behold, she did lied. She had been very selfish, and I had my common expectation as she is a close confidante. That pretty much draws the line across. Anyway, I communicate less with her, and now feel so much merrier for being a lesser fool

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:58:49 GMT

Little M — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:58:49 GMT

Nah, I wouldn’t expose her. As long as we know what is happening, that’s all it matters.

As what the other guy said, no point in getting another enemy. We may need her help one day?

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:47:03 GMT

kiasu_pig — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:47:03 GMT

It’s doesn’t benefit one to expose one’s weakness or lies, might just be good to smile and keep quiet; unless one’s own benefit is been compromised. If there is nothing nice to say about another person, then the best is to keep quiet (and smile). Because the world is just too small, never know when one needs the another help; although one may be seem to be more superior than another at this instant of time, the wheel of change (or fortune) may turn. Nothing is permanent, except change[s] and death[s].

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:45:04 GMT

KingRascal — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:45:04 GMT

Thought her act was pretty foolish as her child is bound to blurt it out some day…

To me, there is a difference between secrecy and deception. Our children are observing each and every of our acts. We have to ensure that we are setting a right standard for them to follow.

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:41:24 GMT

KingRascal — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 14:41:24 GMT

I have already made it very clear that going on a competitive level for my D'S is not what I am looking as it's too time-consuming...so it's perfectly alright for her to admit that she is giving her child more. So there is nothing that she shd hide

I was just joking with my DH that she didn't want us to know for fear that her child could not perform despite the extra training!

ksi:
Ya lor....as common as slice bread leh...

Real ugly competition is if she tries to influence the coach to give the opportunity to her kid who is not as good and deprived other well-deserved children of that opportunity. :lol:

Reply to Lied - Would you expose her??? on Tue, 17 Aug 2010 12:25:55 GMT

corneyAmber — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 12:25:55 GMT

Ya lor....as common as slice bread leh...

Real ugly competition is if she tries to influence the coach to give the opportunity to her kid who is not as good and deprived other well-deserved children of that opportunity. :lol: