jtoh:

How about students who hang around Starbucks all day with just one order of a drink. A Starbucks I went to once was full, not a vacant seat around. But there was a table with four chairs all occupied by bags and the table strewn with study material. No owner to be seen. Half an hour later, the owner showed up, sat down and continued to study. No drink in sight. How inconsiderate is that to deprive others of a seat when the person isn't even in Starbucks.

concern2:

pinky:

it's true, I read an article before that any elderly in Korea has the right to slap any youngster who do not give up seats to them in public places :yikes:

:yikes: You mean other than their wives??

pinky:

it's true, I read an article before that any elderly in Korea has the right to slap any youngster who do not give up seats to them in public places :yikes:

LOLMum:

Angelight:

Atrecord, in Japan and other western countries too, people are also more gracious towards the elderly. They have no problems giving up seats to elderly on public transport. Not sure why here in Spore, it is so difficult... is it due to the \"kiasu\" mentality, don't want to lose out, even to the elderly and more needy people? :?



same thing is happening in korea and london (from what i saw and experienced). is not kiasu mentality, more like we both paid the fare, so what if you were pregnant, with kids, fragil etc kinda mentality? especially in places where women are calling for equal treatment/rights, men just cant be bothered to give up their seats.

i saw on youtube a year or so ago, an angry old korean lady attacked a young lady in the train (i think it was about the young lady not giving up her seat on the train despite being asked). cant locate it now.

and honestly i still prefer our own mrt train/buses cos' at least i know i can have a safe journey to my destination. you never know what you would encounter when you take the transport in london or ny.

Angelight:

My mum related a recent incident to me which really made me :shock: :slapshead: :mad: :nunchuk: !


She was taking the MRT but there was no seat. She was then standing near a couple with a son. The man was sitting on the seat meant for elderly/invalid/pregnant women. His son was sitting between him and his wife. Seeing that this guy has no intention to give up his seat, my elderly mum then told him that his seat is meant for those with special needs. You know what he said?

\"Ok, then I let my son take my seat lor!\" Then he exchanged seats with his son. :siao: At this time, his wife also spoke, \"We also paid money for the train ride, you know, why should we give up our seats to you?!\" :stupid: :mad:

If you were on that train and witnessed this, what would you have done?

atrecord:

In terms of courtesy, respect and being considerate to senior citizens on the train, i feel (embarrassingly) that we are miles behind a country that we perceive to be really lacking in grace most of the time -- China.

Last Dec I was in ShenZhen, with my wife, 2 kids (5 & 7 then), plus my parents (in their 70s, with white hair). Inside the busy MRT station, where the people have to walk a long designated route to queue up to get past the auto barrier, there are designated special (like those for handicapped type) counters manned by staff, who will open up the barrier for the elderly, as long as they have some form of documentation (IC or passport), FOC regardless of locals or foreigners. Senior citizens travel on public transport FOC...

Then when we boarded a train that arrived, 2 men in their (prob early) 50s, who were seated, immediately (and it was honestly immediate) stood up and gave up their seats to my parents. We were appreciative obviously, and surprised too - as it's probably not something we're used to seeing here in Singapore.

ksi:

It does not hurt to show more graciousness towards the weaker and needy ones. The fact that designated seats are made for them, it is to help them avoid such situations, yet the able-bodied guy created a situation. He had given a negative demo to his son in the train incident. In future it may not be anyone else but the son telling the parents in turn, \"I need the seat, both of you can stand.\" The father reaps what he sows. This was in fact a good opportunity of a teaching point for the son but the dad missed it.

ksi:

While I agree with you people in need should also show courtesy when they need help, I have a varying perspective in that I would tend to cut them some slack, we do not have to feel so equal all the time. Not all needy people have this phenomenon but my take is that typically a needy person, the temperament may not be as good. For example, my aging mum is very edgy at times and I don't think she wills it but sometimes she cannot help it. Her aging body sometimes misbehaves and causes her some discomfort. So far she could control her temperament outside but at home, we get the full colours of it. Her legs are weakening by the day and I think it is a miserable feeling. So for old people, I naturally cut them some slack. Of course there can be super fit 70-80 YOs around, but I won't second-guess their state of health. If they are irritable but not extremely rude as in hollering at me and sending me abusive words, I would take the initiative to smile and offer the seat. It does not hurt to show more graciousness towards the weaker and needy ones.

limlim:

Angelight:

You were not at the scene, so pls don't pass judgmental remark that my mum was \"lecturing\" the inconsiderate couple. To you and that guy, it may sound like a lecture, but to others it's a fair comment (he is INDEED sitting on a reserved seat and refused to give up his seat to a elderly), so it's very subjective whether the comment is a lecture or not.

I'm just stating facts. You don't have to take it too personal.

The thing is, Why can't the needy just say \"May I have the seat? Please?\", instead of \"This seat is for someone with special needs\".

If you still don't get it, look at it this way, you're pointing out to someone that they're wrong, and generally pple don't like it this way. In the end, your mom doesn't get the seat and instead got angry. is it worth it?

The word \"lecture\" doesn't meant scolding someone. It just meant you're telling someone that he did something wrong. The fact is that your mom is giving a critical statement more than making a \"request\". It's not necessary to be at the scene to judge the kind of response that she can expect. And I'm not assuming that the tone is harsh.. but it probably doesn't sound too pleasant to invoke that kind of response, maybe? And quite obviously, the magical word is missing..

Towards a gracious society, I feel that not only the able can be gracious, but the needy can also be gracious and request for assistance when they need it.. In a PROPER way..

Anyway, it's okay if what I say doesn't makes sense to you. And certainty it is nothing personal. Just want to highlight that the needy should adopt a correct attitude. They should view it that someone giving up their seat to them is a privilege, not an entitlement.

verykiasu2010:

jtoh:

[quote=\"verykiasu2010\"]recently in a ulu airport in a big country


the airline has a mini bus to ferry their 'vip' pax

one particular flight i was in happened to have so many vip pax, so one bus was not enough

after we deplaned, we all got into the first bus but there is a problem

someone insist his bag must be on the seat next to him but there is no other seat

so no choice got to tell him within earshot of everyone in the bus : the seat is for human, not for bag

sorry did not know he was some official but he threw his own face lah ....... not my fault ... :rotflmao: :evil: :evil:

Haha. So how did you find out he was some official. kacang official or vip?

jtoh:

verykiasu2010:

recently in a ulu airport in a big country


the airline has a mini bus to ferry their 'vip' pax

one particular flight i was in happened to have so many vip pax, so one bus was not enough

after we deplaned, we all got into the first bus but there is a problem

someone insist his bag must be on the seat next to him but there is no other seat

so no choice got to tell him within earshot of everyone in the bus : the seat is for human, not for bag

sorry did not know he was some official but he threw his own face lah ....... not my fault ... :rotflmao: :evil: :evil:

Haha. So how did you find out he was some official. kacang official or vip?

verykiasu2010:

recently in a ulu airport in a big country


the airline has a mini bus to ferry their 'vip' pax

one particular flight i was in happened to have so many vip pax, so one bus was not enough

after we deplaned, we all got into the first bus but there is a problem

someone insist his bag must be on the seat next to him but there is no other seat

so no choice got to tell him within earshot of everyone in the bus : the seat is for human, not for bag

sorry did not know he was some official but he threw his own face lah ....... not my fault ... :rotflmao: :evil: :evil:

LKVM:

I ever tried to give my reserved seat to some lady whom I thought was pregnant but she became paiseh and said no she isnt preggie... so how now?

Angelight:

You were not at the scene, so pls don't pass judgmental remark that my mum was \"lecturing\" the inconsiderate couple. To you and that guy, it may sound like a lecture, but to others it's a fair comment (he is INDEED sitting on a reserved seat and refused to give up his seat to a elderly), so it's very subjective whether the comment is a lecture or not.

limlim:

You say your mom is not \"bold enough\" to ask, but bold enough to lecture someone that the seat is \"meant for someone with special needs\"? Trying to give a lecture will likely invoke the kind of response that she encountered. Maybe if she just ask nicely and say she needs the seat, the outcome might have been different..?

To the question of someone more needy, that is very subjective.. a 60yo can look fit, and a fat woman can appear like pregnant. If the person never say, how can others tell? Unless it is very obvious case.

Or if they are really paiseh and cannot open their mouth to ask, then, wear a tag or something so that others can identify them as \"needy\" people. Or wear the senior citizen pass outside.

As for pregnant woman, they should help themselves by always wearing maternity dress etc.. that way, it is easier for pple to judge and offer their seats accordingly, w/o end up embarrassing both parties. Saw some woman, looks like pregnant, wearing a loose dress but not a typical maternity dress, and wearing heels?!.. really can't tell whether they are fat or pregnant....