<![CDATA[My husband is addicted to his handphone :(]]>Heya, I am a newbie. My husband is completely addited to his phone. He wakes up early and sleeps late to play with it, and even in bed, in the middle of the night. And thats not mentioning throughout the whole day, any chance he gets. He gets irritated if he needs to look after our little boy for more than half an hour, and even if he does, he will still be playing his hp! We are both ft working parents with no maid, except a part time helper on one morning. Most of the time, I end up having to retrieve mylittle boy from trouble because he had wandered off when daddy was supposed to watch him. And no money for guessing what daddy was doing at that time! Arugh! How do you deal with this? I have mentioned before but unless I kick a super big fuss, its him and his beloved phone all day long! :frustrated: :frustrated:

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/topic/34994/my-husband-is-addicted-to-his-handphoneRSS for NodeFri, 24 Apr 2026 01:16:35 GMTThu, 26 Apr 2012 02:31:39 GMT60<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Thu, 07 Jun 2012 14:08:27 GMT]]>

SandS:
And worse thing is he gets upset when the kids messed up his games. Can issue warning to the kids not to touch that game if they fiddle with his phone. It's just a game!! *goodness*
Hehe I am a SAHM and used to be addicted to online games and was like that too. I'd move from one game to another but wouldn't stop. I was more concern about my fake money than my bank account. And i won't quit even when my hubby hinted strongly that I should. Now that i have quit, the fake money is nothing.

The will to stop must come from myself. The addiction must be replaced by something else which gives equal satisfaction. So yes, starting a healthy hobby will help us to stop gaming.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/775629https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/775629Thu, 07 Jun 2012 14:08:27 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Wed, 06 Jun 2012 09:02:57 GMT]]>

ammonite:


Erm, brooms, ironing board and children do not talk like adults or fulfill adult needs?? :siam:

No excuse to be addicted of course, but if your wife says she is lonely,it may be a signal to spend some time together instead of you gaming and she whatsapping.
heh... sorry to confuse the thread. I'm asking in general, i'm not the hubby who is addicted to gaming in this thread. but just hitching on this thread to generally understand issues of Mars & Venus. Personally, I don't game that much. Only with my kid occasionally.

I'm a guy, so I understand why guy games. Like now Diablo 3, every guy is talking about it. So my feedback is that generally 1-2hrs gaming per day for guy is \"normal\" and when viewed as \"addiction\", then a lot of us guys are addicted

And i'm asking why gals will do social networking online / whatsapp etc when the family is home, kids to care for, hubby to talk to etc. Since I do plenty much of the housework as well and I understand brooms don't talk. 😛

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774901https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774901Wed, 06 Jun 2012 09:02:57 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Wed, 06 Jun 2012 03:01:38 GMT]]>

missk:
Thanks guys and gals, that was so insightful. We are now seeking help, so hope things get better. I myself, am learing to understand how addictions form. Iguess I reacted badly, because Ididn't understand how he can find time to get addicted when we have a cute and demanding toddler who needs so much attention. And yes, it is really a game addiction, and I thought it was only youngsters who suffer that problem. Iguess it stems from a lot of issues, such as poor social skills, loneliness, poor self-control, not knowing what are the more important things to be done around the house, but that being said, it is good to encourage a hobby that can be shared by everyone 🙂

Hi Missk,
What kinda help are you referring to? My hubby is the same, he is quite addicted to his hp/ipad games. He can continually play the same game for months. I don't understand how his interest for some game can be sustained for so long (for eg PvZ). Sigh. He is socially active (goes out with colleagues/ex-colleague for dinner/drinks once awhile, weekly badminton sessions) and pretty ok self control (wakes up at 6am to go gym). But yes, he doesnt know what are the more important things to be done around the house! Ask him do 1, he do 1... and no more. Doesn't take the initiatives to follow on doing 2, 3. Any free time and he's glued to his games. And worse thing is he gets upset when the kids messed up his games. Can issue warning to the kids not to touch that game if they fiddle with his phone. It's just a game!! *goodness*

If its not convenient to mention here, can pm me what kinda help you are seeking?

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774700https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774700Wed, 06 Jun 2012 03:01:38 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Tue, 05 Jun 2012 23:28:15 GMT]]>

missk:
Ididn't understand how he can find time to get addicted when we have a cute and demanding toddler who needs so much attention. 🙂

:rotflmao:

i'm sure your dh will succumb to his cuteness Very Soon ~ 😃

all the best!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774640https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774640Tue, 05 Jun 2012 23:28:15 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Tue, 05 Jun 2012 03:19:20 GMT]]>Thanks guys and gals, that was so insightful. We are now seeking help, so hope things get better. I myself, am learing to understand how addictions form. Iguess I reacted badly, because Ididn't understand how he can find time to get addicted when we have a cute and demanding toddler who needs so much attention. And yes, it is really a game addiction, and I thought it was only youngsters who suffer that problem. Iguess it stems from a lot of issues, such as poor social skills, loneliness, poor self-control, not knowing what are the more important things to be done around the house, but that being said, it is good to encourage a hobby that can be shared by everyone 🙂

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774190https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774190Tue, 05 Jun 2012 03:19:20 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Tue, 05 Jun 2012 01:15:50 GMT]]>

Idono:
Why will gals feel \"lonely\" when there's so much to be done, ie housework, care for kids, teach them etc..... As a guy, i still don't quite get it. Maybe I might find some answers here? Any gals can put it in simple english? I really dislike it when like there's dirty laundry, clothes to iron etc and wife is just whatsapp with someone else. For me, i prefer to call when there's something to be discussed during the day. Only whatsapp when its really really urgent (ie arranging meetups, outings etc), or when the family have gone to bed, and i'm still full of energy. So i might end up gaming / watching movie or whatsapp.

Erm, brooms, ironing board and children do not talk like adults or fulfill adult needs?? :siam:

No excuse to be addicted of course, but if your wife says she is lonely,it may be a signal to spend some time together instead of you gaming and she whatsapping.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774118https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774118Tue, 05 Jun 2012 01:15:50 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Tue, 05 Jun 2012 00:12:23 GMT]]>

valvestate:
Intermezzo:


eg. was he into photography or music or building model race cars in his school days? maybe you can offer to go shopping with him for a really good camera or a guitar etc.. tell him how good he used to be at that hobby, and that your son is really keen to learn from him and develop the hobbies..

:goodpost: Good answer!

thanks valvestate ~ 😃
it's encouraging to know that a guy thinks this might work..

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774092https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774092Tue, 05 Jun 2012 00:12:23 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Tue, 05 Jun 2012 00:10:39 GMT]]>

Idono:
Why will gals feel \"lonely\" when there's so much to be done, ie housework, care for kids, teach them etc..... As a guy, i still don't quite get it. Maybe I might find some answers here? Any gals can put it in simple english? I really dislike it when like there's dirty laundry, clothes to iron etc and wife is just whatsapp with someone else. For me, i prefer to call when there's something to be discussed during the day. Only whatsapp when its really really urgent (ie arranging meetups, outings etc), or when the family have gone to bed, and i'm still full of energy. So i might end up gaming / watching movie or whatsapp.

for me it's the transition from a career that i like, with good friends in the office, to sahm. 😃
i guess chatroom is not so bad, because people you like talking to might not be there same time as you. but being sahm, there's no one at home to \"monitor\" / scold me, so that's the difficult part.
anyway, managed to pull out of the addiction completely in under a year.

i never used whatsapp, so dunno how it works.. but i gather it can be lots more problematic..?

really hope you can find some way to help your wife.. she needs you..
all the best ~

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774090https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/774090Tue, 05 Jun 2012 00:10:39 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Mon, 04 Jun 2012 08:01:21 GMT]]>

Intermezzo:

eg. was he into photography or music or building model race cars in his school days? maybe you can offer to go shopping with him for a really good camera or a guitar etc.. tell him how good he used to be at that hobby, and that your son is really keen to learn from him and develop the hobbies..
:goodpost: Good answer!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773828https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773828Mon, 04 Jun 2012 08:01:21 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Mon, 04 Jun 2012 06:01:02 GMT]]>Why will gals feel "lonely" when there’s so much to be done, ie housework, care for kids, teach them etc… As a guy, i still don’t quite get it. Maybe I might find some answers here? Any gals can put it in simple english? I really dislike it when like there’s dirty laundry, clothes to iron etc and wife is just whatsapp with someone else. For me, i prefer to call when there’s something to be discussed during the day. Only whatsapp when its really really urgent (ie arranging meetups, outings etc), or when the family have gone to bed, and i’m still full of energy. So i might end up gaming / watching movie or whatsapp.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773778https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773778Mon, 04 Jun 2012 06:01:02 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 23:35:26 GMT]]>

missk:
In my definition, it means that there are important things to do (e.g ensure safety of the child, sleeping, driving etc) but someone chooses the phone over that, that looks addicted to me. 1-2 hours is definitely ok, if there is nothing else more important to do.

hi missk,
just a suggestion, if you think it still worth the effort: maybe you can try to subtly get your dh to replace the undesirable \"hobby\" with a more healthy one that he already had some interest in..?

eg. was he into photography or music or building model race cars in his school days? maybe you can offer to go shopping with him for a really good camera or a guitar etc.. tell him how good he used to be at that hobby, and that your son is really keen to learn from him and develop the hobbies..

hopefully it can also create some good bonding time between them, and make him see how much the kid needs him and enjoys being with him.

i was also addicted to the internet chatroom some years ago. being a sahm, can feel quite \"out-of-things\" and even lonely sometimes, being at home mostly doing monotonous housework, and with no adults to talk to. then i picked up photography for a hobby, and as the interest develops, the fascination of online chatting kind of wore itself out gradually.

take care ~ really hope things get better for you soon.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773673https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773673Sun, 03 Jun 2012 23:35:26 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Sat, 02 Jun 2012 09:48:12 GMT]]>I didn’t mention the social flirt networking application - skout. There are plenty of man, girls and woman online. Can chat anytime everywhere. From decent chat to very intimate.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773310https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773310Sat, 02 Jun 2012 09:48:12 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Fri, 01 Jun 2012 16:24:42 GMT]]>Why is he always on whatsapp? Who is he talking to? I will be very suspicious if my hubby is always on his phone checking his whatsapp or on facebook. Why need to consistently check unless there is someone they are frequently talking to.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773146https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/773146Fri, 01 Jun 2012 16:24:42 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Fri, 01 Jun 2012 07:00:07 GMT]]>Is he really playing games? What "Games"? I’m not trying to scare u, just my experiences. My hubby also always holding his phone, playing with the games. Day, night, outside, at home, while eating, even in the toilet, anytime everywhere. Sometimes i pass by him, he will shift his phone out of my view. Why? Other than playing games, he actually playing others phone applicatons likes whats up and so call social networking applications. Not offended just my two cents. Hope your hubby really into games.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772927https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772927Fri, 01 Jun 2012 07:00:07 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Fri, 01 Jun 2012 05:47:27 GMT]]>Does he still choose the handphone (games) over sex?


If yes, it's a freaking addiction.
And no, it's not a cute young at heart thingy.

Withdrawal symptoms will be anger.. stomping off somewhere else.. cold war treatment.. refusal to participate in any family stuff at all.. tantrum.. forever in a bad grumpy mood..(etc)

And nope.. asking him to read a book on anything will only make him more fed-up..

I'm a rehabilitated KiasuParents addict. :politebleah:

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772903https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772903Fri, 01 Jun 2012 05:47:27 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Fri, 01 Jun 2012 04:53:51 GMT]]>I think playing games using handphone in the train or in your free time at work is still normal and healthy but, neglecting or not giving much attention to my kid is too much. Playing game should be only past time but not be too totally addicted to it... your husband 30++?? Same here... but I have other hobbies and passion like Music & photography so perhaps you can give some hints to your hubby that there are more life than playing silly Android/ IOS games. 😂


and c'mon... we're not teenagers anymore. grow up! 😓

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772878https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772878Fri, 01 Jun 2012 04:53:51 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Fri, 01 Jun 2012 02:42:25 GMT]]>In my definition, it means that there are important things to do (e.g ensure safety of the child, sleeping, driving etc) but someone chooses the phone over that, that looks addicted to me. 1-2 hours is definitely ok, if there is nothing else more important to do.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772818https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772818Fri, 01 Jun 2012 02:42:25 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Thu, 31 May 2012 15:04:40 GMT]]>

Idono:
As a guy, my feedback is a matter of perspective. To most guys, 1-2hrs gaming per day is \"normal\".


However, I see my wife on whatsapp almost every moment, to extend when she cant give the kids her full attn, will be whatsapping while having activity with kids. To me, this is abnormal and bad example to kids. what do you girls think?
Yes, i feel social media like Whatsapp or Facebook can be more dangerous than games. The lure of constantly socialising is strong and this is precisely why I avoid multiplayer games and MMOs. Normally once a new game comes out I will spend a long strecth of hours playing it and after I finish I will go back and focus on my work. But with social media and multiplayer there is no end and it is far easier to get addicted to them.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772681https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772681Thu, 31 May 2012 15:04:40 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Thu, 31 May 2012 03:37:05 GMT]]>As a guy, my feedback is a matter of perspective. To most guys, 1-2hrs gaming per day is "normal".


However, I see my wife on whatsapp almost every moment, to extend when she cant give the kids her full attn, will be whatsapping while having activity with kids. To me, this is abnormal and bad example to kids. what do you girls think?

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772289https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772289Thu, 31 May 2012 03:37:05 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Thu, 31 May 2012 03:20:05 GMT]]>

missk:
Haiz... Things turned ugly:( Think its not just a simple addiction. Maybe I should get external help

I suggest you bring him get some medical help. maybe it's some kind of addiction. i won't be able to tolerate if my husband is constantly on his phone - playing games. hope things will turn out well between you two

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772269https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/772269Thu, 31 May 2012 03:20:05 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Mon, 28 May 2012 14:26:24 GMT]]>Haiz… Things turned ugly:( Think its not just a simple addiction. Maybe I should get external help

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/771124https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/771124Mon, 28 May 2012 14:26:24 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Mon, 30 Apr 2012 02:03:50 GMT]]>Hi missk!

He need to be educated.May be let him to read a book from library like "How to be a good father?"
for get rid of addiction I read somewhere, u can try new skills then u eventually find that interesting and left the other addiction thing.they suggest try cooking or play outdoor games.Why don’t you join him in the evening and play outdoor games.or asked him to take care ur child at playground?
Firstly u educate him he cannot waste time on playing games.If u tell he cannot listen.book will help.Its a long journey.but can be done.

My DH didn’t do anything at home,simply said I don’t know.Slowly, I educate and make realise him that his responsiblities at home.Early years I did with my baby,its very difficult then I didn’t expect from him any work from him.So I can reduce my disappointments and can be calm and happy with child.I brought him outside and relaxed myself.So at home I happily spent my time.He lazy to do exercise then I borrowed books from library, he doesn’t like to read books too,but I always read books,then he slowly read books.Then he came and tell me this food good and that food good and walking is good exercise.Now everyday he go for jogging after work.Sometimes early in the morning also go for jogging.He can take care kids in the playground or bring them to library or cinema.If I ask he can mop.He happily do (cos exercise).Previously not like that, asking why u cannot do(cos I am a SAHM).

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/754032https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/754032Mon, 30 Apr 2012 02:03:50 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Fri, 27 Apr 2012 07:39:56 GMT]]>

missk:
Hmm... Thats something to think about. But you know how men have obsessions and the game is just part of their favourite topic? (not trying to be sexist here... Hee) And why do men need personal time so much I wonder. (not trying to be sexist again)


I feel so bad if I have to say to a full grown adult \"You can only play for3 hours a day, or only when ah boy is asleep!!\"

Maybe I will say something like \" You know, if boi boi sees u play so much, next time he might follow. Then he will flung his studies, then need tuition that cost hundreds of dollars\". :idea:
It does not matter what games. Your husband is not \"young at heart\". He has not grown up at all. But I feel sorry for you because this seems to be quite common. I have a relative in his late 40s and is a banking professional. But he spends all this time at home either watching DVD or playing computer games. He claims that is his right since he does not have any other vices!!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/753076https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/753076Fri, 27 Apr 2012 07:39:56 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to My husband is addicted to his handphone :( on Fri, 27 Apr 2012 03:56:07 GMT]]>

northernstar:
missk:


Haha, he's young at heart, playing games all day, no he's 30+ .
It would be cute if it didn't mean my son occasionally helping me to umm... Overfeed the fish our sell newspapers to the garang guni.
My kid is 2, going on 16, and into everything, including operating printers, computers and washing machines. And oh yes, toys.

sorry, i dun understand u... u mean ur son is 2 or 16 years old? :roll:


A 2 year old, who believes he's already 16, independent and rebellious.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/752949https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/752949Fri, 27 Apr 2012 03:56:07 GMT