How much will you spend on maid's dental cost

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 10 Oct 2013 07:22:26 GMT

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Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Tue, 16 Jul 2013 14:43:35 GMT

rayjay — Tue, 16 Jul 2013 14:43:35 GMT

My previous maid stole my sanitary pads. I exposed on her last day and did not pay a cent extra which was not my practice. Told her that I would not hesitate to be a witness if she continues her stealing habit from her new employers. Hope she turns around.

Now, this current maid wants to go dental checkup. Should I pay for her? Still thinking.... :roll:

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 06:39:53 GMT

MyFriend — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 06:39:53 GMT

FQW:
znzyzyzx:

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand
From the post above, znyzyzx stated that she would have given much more if not for the act of theft (she gave $2K eventually but her maid had worked for her for 6 yrs). So in her way, this is considered punishment already for the maid's indiscretion.

It just goes to show that some employers are more tolerant and forgiving; others are stricter and no-nonsense. A few months back, I read of this woman who bequeathed a tidy sum of a few million bucks to her long serving maid in the ST.

So extremely generous employers do exist. Let's not cast aspersion on others who do so. And as to what lesson is she teaching her children, to me it'll be to forgive is divine.

Been following the thread too.

The message: It is all right to steal (after all it is only about two hundred dollars. You will still get your year end bonus. I will deduct your 'stealing\" from your year end bonus. I am wondering what will be deducted for forgery (if it is also only for two hundred dollars) or just taking the ATM card for a small withdrawal of only two hundred dollars etc etc

It has got nothing to do with generosity so let's not confuse STEALING with GENEROSITY.

Have you heard of any GENEROUS organization that condones stealing by rewarding their employees by deducting from the 13th month or bonus by the amount stolen?

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 05:23:31 GMT

Hiaweh — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 05:23:31 GMT

Aiyoh....... :? :?

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:56:42 GMT

Hard Truth — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:56:42 GMT

You puzzle me. You say it is a meaningless discussion and you keep coming back.

autumnbronze:
Geez,

Another vicious thread for me to back off from.
Vicious? (Judgmental again) You and I do not know all the facts.

It is good to discuss about facts. It is easier this way

Try to let others do their own talking for themselves. Don't make a lot of assumptions why people do this or don't do this. They can speak for themselves if they wish to. You can take their point of view but allow them to come out and make their own clarifications instead of making assumptions that people do not like to be \"witch hunt\"..... etc. It does not contribute to the discussions

Thanks Hard Truth, for the heads up.

No need to thank me. Learn to walk your talk \"autumnbronze\"
You and I do not know all the facts.
It is good to discuss about facts. It is easier this way
Perhaps we may have a more pleasant and meaningful exchange in the future if we focus on facts and who knows it may not turn our to be a \"vicious\" thread

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:30:35 GMT

autumnbronze — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:30:35 GMT

Geez,

Another vicious thread for me to back off from.

Thanks Hard Truth, for the heads up.

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:22:47 GMT

Hard Truth — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:22:47 GMT

Back again? Can't make up your mind if this is a meaningless discussion?

autumnbronze:
Precisely why many do not bother clarifying because they are being 'judged', when their intention is to share.

Are you not being judgmental here?

And who are we to 'judge' anyway??? Are we ourselves guilt free of wrongdoings???

Huh? What is the point that you are trying to make?

She has written sensibly, you are not able to discern it.

There you go again. Being judgmental!! Ha ha preaching that we should not judge and you are doing it

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:11:13 GMT

autumnbronze — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 04:11:13 GMT

Precisely why many do not bother clarifying because they are being ‘judged’, when their intention is to share.

And who are we to ‘judge’ anyway??? Are we ourselves guilt free of wrongdoings???

She has written sensibly, you are not able to discern it.

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 03:43:43 GMT

Hard Truth — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 03:43:43 GMT

You too have obviously not read the poster’s and other posters’ posts carefully. That is why you are reiterating and defending the same thing over and over again, aimlessly.

It is very obvious that the poster has not clarified. You are right that you cannot answer as to why she has chosen not to clarify further, when she had the opportunity to do and let other posters judge what she she has to say?

Isn’t it strange? What is there to be ‘witch hunted’ when one is able to clarify what you write sensibly.

Please do not write in the guise of being understanding when your posts have been otherwise.

Like the poster you too do not wish to engage in this meaningless discussion then why bother to come out and defend the poster when the poster could do so himself or herself? Why hide when clarifications would really help?

Please bear in mind that these maid threads are for sharing, genuine ranting and discursive purposes. If there is any intention of bashing, perhaps you can start a new thread with that intention

Also my 2 cents

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 03:37:15 GMT

iRabbit — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 03:37:15 GMT

znzyzyzx:

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand

From the post above, znyzyzx stated that she would have given much more if not for the act of theft (she gave $2K eventually but her maid had worked for her for 6 yrs). So in her way, this is considered punishment already for the maid's indiscretion.

It just goes to show that some employers are more tolerant and forgiving; others are stricter and no-nonsense. A few months back, I read of this woman who bequeathed a tidy sum of a few million bucks to her long serving maid in the ST.

So extremely generous employers do exist. Let's not cast aspersion on others who do so. And as to what lesson is she teaching her children, to me it'll be to forgive is divine.

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 03:13:23 GMT

autumnbronze — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 03:13:23 GMT

You have obviously not read the poster's post carefully. That is why you are reiterating the same thing over and over again, aimlessly.

Ok, so we know you disagree with the poster's way of handling the situation and you are entitled to your opinion, but please refer back to how you conveyed your views. Is that called for??? So it's right to slam someone just because she chooses not to respond??? That is like hitting someone below the belt when one isn't looking. If you claim that she is encouraging stealing, then you are encouraging bad forum etiquette.

It is very obvious that the poster has clarified. I cannot answer as to why she has chosen not to clarify further, but if it were me, it's because I do not want to be 'witch hunted' anymore :roll:

Please do not write in the guise of being understanding when your posts have been otherwise.

I do not wish to engage in this meaningless discussion with those who refuse to see things in shades of grey.

Please bear in mind that these maid threads are for sharing, genuine ranting and discursive purposes. If there is any intention of bashing, I suggest a new thread with that intention should be created.

My 2 cents

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 02:44:25 GMT

Hard Truth — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 02:44:25 GMT

I am sure everyone here can always go back and read any poster’s rationale on doing things.

The poster always have the opportunity to clarify the actual details of the rationale of his or her action but when the poster chose not to. What then can be said?

We can only read what was being posted and we certainly can learn from one another. But condoning "stealing" and giving a $2000 year end bonus? If there is a reason to condone the "stealing" share it with others. But rewarding such behaviour? What are we teaching our kids who will growing up to be citizens? What values are we imparting?

Try stealing from your employers and you will be lucky that they don’t turn you over to the police and you will be lucky to still have a job?

But being rewarded because you are an employee? Have not heard of any organization doing that.

As usual it is only my 2 cents worth.

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sun, 03 Jun 2012 02:42:46 GMT

Hard Truth — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 02:42:46 GMT

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sat, 02 Jun 2012 12:20:25 GMT

autumnbronze — Sat, 02 Jun 2012 12:20:25 GMT

Note: I am aware that I am :offtopic: here ....

Please go and read the poster's rationale for paying the $2000 again. To me, it seems that the poster was quite explicit.

We do not know a few things:

1.We do not know how the maid was dealt with by the poster after she was caught stealing

2.We do not know if the maid was a good maid when she worked with the poster

3.We do not know what motivated the maid to steal in the first place

I am sure the poster thought hard before deciding to do what she did.

Even if forummers do not agree with the poster's way of dealing with HER maid, I do not think it is right to go around bashing her and making sarcastic remarks. You can disagree civilly. Seriously, these maids are not cut from the same mold.

You need strategy to deal with maids. It's like a chess game. Stressful, initially, but it's a price to pay for having one. I currently have a maid who tells white lies, has questionable hygiene habits, is forgetful etc. The saving grace is that she is very patient in dealing with my kids, she is reticent and she is not rude.

I cannot even post HOW I am dealing with her because each maid is different in character and you have to study them before deciding your
move. I managed to keep my previous maid for 4 years successfully adopting this method and intend to do so for this one. Three things I remind myself whenever I get frustrated with her. They are kampong
people, they are young and it is not in many of their DNA to adopt hygienic
habits. Of course, if it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out and I will have to change. My goal is to go maid-less eventually.

Another thing, I do not deny that many of the agents here are unscrupulous
and the maids do take employers here for a ride. But I also know that it's all about managing expectations and managing people. This one came with supposedly having two years of experience. But it seems to me that she
has had NO experience at all. My ex maid told me that the current one told her that the previous employers were bo chap because they were busy working and were happy because she seemed to take good care of their two kids. Actually, even though if she was trained, I would have re-trained her cuz every household has their own way of doing things.

It's really not fair that just because some forummers here have had bad experience with the agencies and maids to SLAM others for using alternative methods. They are being shoved aside and prevented from sharing their
experiences openly and sincerely. For all you know, tips can be picked up
on how to treat the maids and enable them to stay here longer with us.
Isn't it interesting that positive comments are very few and far between. Yes, one may argue that there are no GOOD maids, but bear in mind that
forummers may just be reluctant to share due to being slammed. I know cuz my good intentions in sharing personal details about how I treat my maid a few weeks ago was slammed by another who chose to see matters only in black and white.

I am as usual, just sharing my 2 cents

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Sat, 02 Jun 2012 10:22:06 GMT

Hard Truth — Sat, 02 Jun 2012 10:22:06 GMT

erista:
Lol this thread went quite OOT....

Anyways back to topic, I previously had an ID maid who had dental problems. One of her molar was broken and would caused her pain every now & then. About 8mths into her contract, I noticed a lot of salt was used up... My maid don't do cooking so I questioned her. She then admitted that she has been using salt & cold water to rinse her mouth when it hurts and she has been doing it for about 2mths. Upon further questioning, she then admitted she broke her tooth about 1yr ago back in her hometown but couldn't afford dental... She was hoping her employer will pay for her dental in Singapore. We told her she was cheating us and told her to either pay for her own dental in SG or we will send her back to agency. She agreed to pay for her own dental as she said she liked working for our family. The bill came up to about $100+.

Just as we go for health checks before we start a new job, these maids do too... Our own companies do not cover certain existing illness (some companies may not even want to hire u if u have health problems), so I feel the same should apply for the FDW.

Agree with what you did.

We should treat our maids fairly and not take advantage of them. Neither do we want to be cheated.

\"We told her she was cheating us and told her to either pay for her own dental in SG or we will send her back to agency.\"

----- Firm and fair, unlike some other employer who condone stealing, and to rub it in, gave a $2000 end of the contract bonus! Must have been one of the super rich employer who thinks that $2000 is nothing!

\"She agreed to pay for her own dental as she said she liked working for our family.\"

-------------- That's the way to motivate a maid! You must be a good employer to work for, otherwise she would have loved to try that stunt of getting her dental problem fixed through another employer (and there are daft employers who will fall for it). There will be some employers who will try to \"motivate\" their maids by using their wealth.

I am sure many would like to learn from you how you managed to motivate your maid without \"bribing\" them.

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Fri, 01 Jun 2012 14:14:09 GMT

erista — Fri, 01 Jun 2012 14:14:09 GMT

Lol this thread went quite OOT…

Anyways back to topic, I previously had an ID maid who had dental problems. One of her molar was broken and would caused her pain every now & then. About 8mths into her contract, I noticed a lot of salt was used up… My maid don’t do cooking so I questioned her. She then admitted that she has been using salt & cold water to rinse her mouth when it hurts and she has been doing it for about 2mths. Upon further questioning, she then admitted she broke her tooth about 1yr ago back in her hometown but couldn’t afford dental… She was hoping her employer will pay for her dental in Singapore. We told her she was cheating us and told her to either pay for her own dental in SG or we will send her back to agency. She agreed to pay for her own dental as she said she liked working for our family. The bill came up to about $100+.

Just as we go for health checks before we start a new job, these maids do too… Our own companies do not cover certain existing illness (some companies may not even want to hire u if u have health problems), so I feel the same should apply for the FDW.

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 11:53:45 GMT

Hard Truth — Thu, 31 May 2012 11:53:45 GMT

znzyzyzx:

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.

Would your decision be different if you were a teacher or a moral teacher or a preacher?

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 11:51:03 GMT

Hard Truth — Thu, 31 May 2012 11:51:03 GMT

carebear:
znzyzyzx:
aiyoh, aiyoh, $2000 so big sum to you meh , until you think others will lie about it ?

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand (which is a big sum to you, i gathered)

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.
To most people, $2000 is alot to give to a maid.
So most of us may find it unbelievable.
Assuming the maid's salary is $500, that's 4 times the amount.
By giving her that amount shows that you are not only rich but very generous!

Agree! to the rich and super rich what is $2000 dollars?

But I believe that what aiyoh was asking was, Is the employer also rewarding someone who stole from you? If that is the case then maids should steal from their employers and get rewarded at the end of their contract.

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 11:47:40 GMT

Hard Truth — Thu, 31 May 2012 11:47:40 GMT

carebear:
znzyzyzx:
aiyoh, aiyoh, $2000 so big sum to you meh , until you think others will lie about it ?

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand (which is a big sum to you, i gathered)

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.
To most people, $2000 is alot to give to a maid.
So most of us may find it unbelievable.
Assuming the maid's salary is $500, that's 4 times the amount.
By giving her that amount shows that you are not only rich but very generous!

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 11:46:06 GMT

znzyzyzx — Thu, 31 May 2012 11:46:06 GMT

Huh ? 秀才遇着兵！ Anyway, I am a busy mother of 4, I am not interested to be enaged in this kind of meaningless discussion.

The author asked how much we willing to spend on maid's dental cost. I have already said I will not pay any amount. Case closed. No more interest in this topic.

aiyoh:
znzyzyzx:
aiyoh, aiyoh, $2000 so big sum to you meh , until you think others will lie about it ?

aiyoh yes lot of money to me not as rich as u leh

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand (which is a big sum to you, i gathered)

aiyoh ..you still no understand....you can give any amount of money you like ..nobody stop you....but you say send message \"stealing money is ok\" ...i still reward you ...aiyoh

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.

aiyoh ...becuse you not teacher or preacher...you can preach \"stealing money\" ok?...but teacher, moral teacher or preacher cannot?....aiyoh

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 11:23:58 GMT

aiyoh — Thu, 31 May 2012 11:23:58 GMT

znzyzyzx:
aiyoh, aiyoh, $2000 so big sum to you meh , until you think others will lie about it ?

aiyoh yes lot of money to me not as rich as u leh

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand (which is a big sum to you, i gathered)

aiyoh ..you still no understand....you can give any amount of money you like ..nobody stop you....but you say send message \"stealing money is ok\" ...i still reward you ...aiyoh

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.

aiyoh ...becuse you not teacher or preacher...you can preach \"stealing money\" ok?...but teacher, moral teacher or preacher cannot?....aiyoh

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 07:09:46 GMT

autumnbronze — Thu, 31 May 2012 07:09:46 GMT

znzyzyzx:
I am not super rich nor overly generous.

What I did was, instead of giving her higher increment, I gave her less increment and gave her the rest that i had intended to give her in the first place anyway. Why I did that was because I realised that they dont know how to save, they just spent whatever they have. Their family would keep asking them to send money home.

I do not want my maids to go home with nothing on their back after slogging overseas for several years. Even though most of them are not fantastic maids, but ....

And $2000 sounds big as one lump sum, but if you think about it, it is only $80plus per month for a two year period.
carebear:
[quote=\"znzyzyzx\"]aiyoh, aiyoh, $2000 so big sum to you meh , until you think others will lie about it ?

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand (which is a big sum to you, i gathered)

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.
To most people, $2000 is alot to give to a maid.
So most of us may find it unbelievable.
Assuming the maid's salary is $500, that's 4 times the amount.
By giving her that amount shows that you are not only rich but very generous!

[/quote]I get you znzyzyzx!!!

It was really unfortunate that your maid stole from your mom. I can imagine the disappointment and also perhaps anger that you may have felt. But at the same time, it is admirable that you took into consideration the two years that she spent with your family.

One has to look at the bigger picture sometimes.

And anyway, with regards to maid issues, really, it's to each his own lah.

My 2 cents

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 04:58:17 GMT

znzyzyzx — Thu, 31 May 2012 04:58:17 GMT

I am not super rich nor overly generous.

What I did was, instead of giving her higher increment, I gave her less increment and gave her the rest that i had intended to give her in the first place anyway. Why I did that was because I realised that they dont know how to save, they just spent whatever they have. Their family would keep asking them to send money home.

I do not want my maids to go home with nothing on their back after slogging overseas for several years. Even though most of them are not fantastic maids, but ....

And $2000 sounds big as one lump sum, but if you think about it, it is only $80plus per month for a two year period.

carebear:
znzyzyzx:
aiyoh, aiyoh, $2000 so big sum to you meh , until you think others will lie about it ?

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand (which is a big sum to you, i gathered)

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.
To most people, $2000 is alot to give to a maid.
So most of us may find it unbelievable.
Assuming the maid's salary is $500, that's 4 times the amount.
By giving her that amount shows that you are not only rich but very generous!

Reply to How much will you spend on maid's dental cost on Thu, 31 May 2012 02:48:28 GMT

nms1 — Thu, 31 May 2012 02:48:28 GMT

carebear:
znzyzyzx:
aiyoh, aiyoh, $2000 so big sum to you meh , until you think others will lie about it ?

The plan was to give $1000 for each year of service, subject to a maximum cap. So by stealing about two hundreds, she missed out on a few thousand (which is a big sum to you, i gathered)

I am not a teacher nor a moral teacher nor a preacher, I gave them money because they have served as my employee.
To most people, $2000 is alot to give to a maid.
So most of us may find it unbelievable.
Assuming the maid's salary is $500, that's 4 times the amount.
By giving her that amount shows that you are not only rich but very generous!

$2000 sounds like a lot but based on a $500 salary it's only 2 months bonus for each year of the contract. Some of us get as much or more than that from our employers