P1 DS copied and lied

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Fri, 13 Jul 2012 07:16:11 GMT

HAPPYH — Fri, 13 Jul 2012 07:16:11 GMT

whitecorp:
mummyscopio:
hahaha..... but the problem is.... I am an ex-teacher and now a tutor ....

seems funny if i need to spend money to engage ppl to do my job... :rotflmao:
Heard of the saying where a doctor can heal everyone but his own family members?

Sometimes you become too emotionally invested in your son's learning progress ( and correcting his less than desirable habits) that you might not do the most rational thing to help him.

Peace.

I think most of the parents want the best out of their children. If that does not happen, automatically we become emotional. That is true but it does not mean we can not teach our own kids. We have the responsibility to correct or teach them whenever necessary.

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 18:49:07 GMT

tutormum — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 18:49:07 GMT

Don't :pokeeye: :torchme: Ever since DS3 was in P1, I let him mark his own work. He would do his work and check if he's correct. If he got it wrong, he would check with me and do his corrections. He did that till he was in P6. He doesn't do any assessments for sec sch. Anyway, he had very few assessment books - about 1 for each subject every year until he felt that he didn't need to do any. If I don't remember wrongly, he only had a Maths assessment book for P6 and didn't even complete it. Doing assessments may be a chore to some and if it's too easy, the child will be bored. Of course, if the child is weak in the subject, then have to do lor, no choice. What I mean is, assessment books should not be all and end all.

As for caning, I seldom use physical punishment. Unless it's a major 'crime' I usually reason with my children. Welding the cane is enough to scare the devil out of them. :rotflmao: Yes, I agree that sparing the rod will spoil the child yet, I have seen parents screaming and caning their children but still no improvement in behaviour lei. :scratchhead:

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:45:04 GMT

mummyscopio — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:45:04 GMT

HAPPYH:
I believe in scolding/use hands to smack too if my DD is wrong in doing certain things. I am not saying that caning is wrong. But I dont use cane as I am a bad-tempered person at times and I worry I may hit very hard.

Yes, I agree with you that scolding or caning does not mean we kill the interest of the child. We as the parents are always trying our best to teach the good values.

Btw, my DD copied the answers in P2 and I scolded her, threw away the book, etc....I stapled the answers then. Nevertheless, she did it again. I just threaten her that I will inform her form teacher. Of course, I also talked with her and clarified that mummy dont expect her to get all correct all the times. She is very scared and then stopped doing that (I hope so).

Hi happyh

Thank you... I agree with you on the controlling of strength thing... Its a tough thing

And all mommies...

Thanks for your help... Now I know its perfectly normal for most kids to do this once or twice... Will continue to talk and guide them thru this phrase...

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:44:59 GMT

mummyscopio — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:44:59 GMT

XXXX:
mummyscopio:
XXXX

Btw life is full of temptations... In my context, having the answer keys left in the books doesn't make it right for him to copy... And hence faultless and not to be punished...
In life there will be more and bigger temptations... It doesn't mean that he is right to commit it and not be judged or punished....

It he is wrong he is wrong.... We will not educate him to blame others and say things like 'look... Its not my problem.. Someone left the temptations behind to tempt me'
That wasn't my point. He was wrong. I was questioning the mixed messages you are giving him and your choice of resorting to physical punishment of a young child.

BTW, I've put up a poll on the use of caning, please feel free to vote and contribute your views there.

There was no mixed message I sent to him... He was wrong... I punished...
I was just impressed by his ability to read the answer keys... That's all... Its a skill he displayed for a wrong act... But a skill..

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:44:09 GMT

mummyscopio — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:44:09 GMT

XXXX:
mummyscopio:
XXXX

Btw life is full of temptations... In my context, having the answer keys left in the books doesn't make it right for him to copy... And hence faultless and not to be punished...
In life there will be more and bigger temptations... It doesn't mean that he is right to commit it and not be judged or punished....

It he is wrong he is wrong.... We will not educate him to blame others and say things like 'look... Its not my problem.. Someone left the temptations behind to tempt me'
That wasn't my point. He was wrong. I was questioning the mixed messages you are giving him and your choice of resorting to physical punishment of a young child.

BTW, I've put up a poll on the use of caning, please feel free to vote and contribute your views there.

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:39:12 GMT

mummyscopio — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:39:12 GMT

HAPPYH:
I believe in scolding/use hands to smack too if my DD is wrong in doing certain things. I am not saying that caning is wrong. But I dont use cane as I am a bad-tempered person at times and I worry I may hit very hard.

Yes, I agree with you that scolding or caning does not mean we kill the interest of the child. We as the parents are always trying our best to teach the good values.

Btw, my DD copied the answers in P2 and I scolded her, threw away the book, etc....I stapled the answers then. Nevertheless, she did it again. I just threaten her that I will inform her form teacher. Of course, I also talked with her and clarified that mummy dont expect her to get all correct all the times. She is very scared and then stopped doing that (I hope so).

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:37:37 GMT

XXXX — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:37:37 GMT

mummyscopio:
XXXX

Btw life is full of temptations... In my context, having the answer keys left in the books doesn't make it right for him to copy... And hence faultless and not to be punished...
In life there will be more and bigger temptations... It doesn't mean that he is right to commit it and not be judged or punished....

It he is wrong he is wrong.... We will not educate him to blame others and say things like 'look... Its not my problem.. Someone left the temptations behind to tempt me'

That wasn't my point. He was wrong. I was questioning the mixed messages you are giving him and your choice of resorting to physical punishment of a young child.

BTW, I've put up a poll on the use of caning, please feel free to vote and contribute your views there.

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:16:50 GMT

HAPPYH — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:16:50 GMT

I believe in scolding/use hands to smack too if my DD is wrong in doing certain things. I am not saying that caning is wrong. But I dont use cane as I am a bad-tempered person at times and I worry I may hit very hard.

Yes, I agree with you that scolding or caning does not mean we kill the interest of the child. We as the parents are always trying our best to teach the good values.

Btw, my DD copied the answers in P2 and I scolded her, threw away the book, etc…I stapled the answers then. Nevertheless, she did it again. I just threaten her that I will inform her form teacher. Of course, I also talked with her and clarified that mummy dont expect her to get all correct all the times. She is very scared and then stopped doing that (I hope so).

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:01:10 GMT

mummyscopio — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 03:01:10 GMT

XXXX

Btw life is full of temptations… In my context, having the answer keys left in the books doesn’t make it right for him to copy… And hence faultless and not to be punished…
In life there will be more and bigger temptations… It doesn’t mean that he is right to commit it and not be judged or punished…

It he is wrong he is wrong… We will not educate him to blame others and say things like ‘look… Its not my problem… Someone left the temptations behind to tempt me’

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 02:57:07 GMT

mummyscopio — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 02:57:07 GMT

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 02:30:47 GMT

mummyscopio — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 02:30:47 GMT

XXXX

Nope didn’t enraged me…

I am not a Christian n neither are my family…

We are old school parents are belief in my parents’ way of parenting…
My parents are illiterate folks… But they teach morals well…

But because are educated… We do our parenting the same but we explain to the kids too…For you
For your info… The first time I came my soon was when he was one and half yo… He went into the kitchen and climbed onto the drawers door handles…
This its the 2ND t time.

How hard the strikes? Enough for him to understand that what he did is wrong…

Btw Christians dun cane? Who are you to claim for all Christians?

And says who are all parents who are strict and traditional upbringing dun care about making learning fun and interesting???

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Tue, 10 Jul 2012 01:18:38 GMT

XXXX — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 01:18:38 GMT

mummyscopio:
hi mommies,

my DS committed the \"crime\" trice within a month.. and its driving me mad!!

during the last week of the hols, i was marking one of my son's assessment books when i found a piece of crayon in between the pages of the answer key... i looked at his \"prefect\" answers and starting questioning.. at first he said he never looked at the answer.. after serious questioning he finally admitted... i explained to him that copying from the answer keys is not right and lying is worse..

3 days later, he did it again! i was hopping mad :mad: and gave him a slashing... i told him he had jeopardised my trust in him and i removed all the answer keys from all his books.

Yday, i was marking his math book and saw that all his sums are missing working... (it was a new book and the answer keys are still intact)...
i was extremely disappointed and mad.. and DH caned him....

Any mommied experienced the same thing?
how can we make him understand that this is unacceptable.. (although i was rather impressed that he is able to make out which unit, which exercise and which answers to copy amongst the wordy answer key)

we have explained, scolded and cane....
really not sure what to do if it ever happen again... which i bet will as he is only in P1......

Wow. Where to begin....

\" i was rather impressed that he is able to make out which unit, which exercise and which answers to copy amongst the wordy answer key\"

Mixed messages, much? With so much emphasis on completing a task and getting high scores, who cares about making learning fun and interesting?

BTW, and this is only my humble opinion, but caning a child when you put temptation in his way (leaving him with access to the answer sheets!) isn't very Christian of you or your \"DH\". (You mention you are church-goers in later posts.) How hard does DH decide to strike the cane - just to cause bruising or is broken skin occasionally OK with you?

This post will no doubt enrage you. Rest on it a while before responding.

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 18:08:26 GMT

newuser — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 18:08:26 GMT

My DS did that when he was p1.

I made him copy compo since he liked to copy so much.
Of course after the punishment I did explain why he shouldn’t do that.
He did twice and the second time, I double the punishment.
Thereafter, he stopped doing it.

Every child is different.

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:50:43 GMT

verykiasu2010 — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:50:43 GMT

ya of course you know your child better

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:42:46 GMT

mummyscopio — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:42:46 GMT

Thank you for all the advice.

Yet I still believe that practice makes perfect… He its not really clever…the only good subject is math…so only math I go for challenging Qns…

I dun think the workload is too heavy… His schedule is simply…
He wakes up at 8 everyday…he plays till 9:30. 9:30-11 he does his work…then he plays and waits for lunch… Then its free time till Sch… Unless its spelling day… That we do revision before he hours to school.

After school he starts his work at 8…school work if any then my work… Most of the time its around 8 pages… Then he’s free till I finish work around 9:30pm… Then we go thru his errors… Read stories… Play games and he sleeps at about 10:30…

Sat is usually play day… The Dd2 goes for ballet class gets to choose to follow our stay home to play… Afternoon he goes for creative writing class then we are off to mum’s place where he plays with all his cousins…

Sun he attends church and sun school then 3+ then we go shopping or watch TV at home… If e stay home then 1 hr of homework on sun…

He is actually rather free… The reason he did so much is cos we kept it regular… So that he dun forget what he learnt…

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:40:29 GMT

verykiasu2010 — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:40:29 GMT

just beware of burnt out too early too young

let him slack around a little should not be too bad

he will get lots of revision / past year papers when he gets to pri 5 & 6

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:36:19 GMT

mummyscopio — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 16:36:19 GMT

Thank you for all the advice.

Yet I still believe that practice makes perfect… He is not really clever…the only good subject is math…so only math I go for challenging Qns…

I dun think the workload is too heavy… His schedule is simply…
He wakes up at 8 everyday…he plays till 9:30. 9:30-11 he does his work…then he plays and waits for lunch… Then its free time till Sch… Unless its spelling day… That we do revision before he goes to school.

After school he starts his work at 8…school work if any then my work… Most of the time its around 8 pages… Then he’s free till I finish work around 9:30pm… Then we go thru his errors… Read stories… Play games and he sleeps at about 10:30…

Sat is usually play day… The Dd2 goes for ballet class gets to choose to follow us or stay home to play… Afternoon he goes for creative writing class then we are off to mum’s place where he plays with all his cousins…

Sun he attends church and sun school then 3+ then we go shopping or watch TV at home… If e stay home then 1 hr of homework on sun…

He is actually rather free… The reason he did so much is cos we kept it regular… So that he dun forget what he learnt…

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 10:29:45 GMT

sleepy — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 10:29:45 GMT

mummyscopio:
To date he had finishing 2 EL books, 3 math books and 4 CL books... And he had never copied till recently...

I know keeping the answers away well deter it from happening... But dun really liked the 治标不治本method....

This is too much workload for a p1 child, especially if your ds finds it too easy. He may feel that there is no point in practising something he already knew?

To check suitablity, I usually select a couple of questions from each topic for my dd to try out. If it's too easy for her, I will skip the entire book and move to the next level. Thus she didn't finish a single assessment book to date, just 10% to 15% at the most. By p2, she progressed to p6 grammar assessment book. At least that keep her interested since doing assessment book is not part of her usual routine & motivated because she learned something out of it.

I feel that doing assessment books is not high priority. Now, I only let her attempt assessment books when I spot a particular area where she needs more practise, then select few exercises on that particular area

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 09:03:10 GMT

tutormum — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 09:03:10 GMT

I agree that if your DS is very good at his work, you shouldn’t pile on those assessment books. You know your child best. If those assessment books are too boring for him and worst, he has to finish lots of them, he will try to cut corners. Why not bring him to the library and borrow books for him to read. Knowing that the school textbooks contain very little information, this is the time to build up his general knowledge which will be helpful to him in the future. Let him learn beyond the school walls. Trust me, my DS3 a very good example. He doesn’t have to put much efforts in his studies and school life is a breeze.

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 07:04:35 GMT

verykiasu2010 — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 07:04:35 GMT

may be you should not give him any assessment books at all

if he is good and so be it, why need the additional assessment books ?

more assessment books will bore and numb him and makes learning boring for him

give him something more advanced and more challenging and he will love it rather than boring repetitive tasks…

you may have a smart kid so please stop the caning and stop damaging his potential

ouch ! i feel his pain of being misunderstood and "misguided"!

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sun, 08 Jul 2012 04:26:43 GMT

mel2sg — Sun, 08 Jul 2012 04:26:43 GMT

I suppose it is part of their growing-up phase. My daughter (now P5) did that when she was in P1 last time, and now my boy (P1) also going thru the same thing. I believe this has partly got to do with our kids joining the Mainstream, where they learn both the good & bad behaviours from each other - :evil: .

That is precisely what parenting is all about, to explain & teach them the right from wrong. You have to be patient as eventually they will get the message and grow out of it. Anyway, who says parenting is easy, right :itwasntme:

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sat, 07 Jul 2012 21:42:13 GMT

alng — Sat, 07 Jul 2012 21:42:13 GMT

It is a lot for a P1 to finish 2 EL, 3 Math and 4 CL books. Could he get bored or not motivated to do assessment books? Learning does not just take place by doing assessment books. Over doing might kill a child’s interests to learn.

An expert in human motivation ever said that it is a waste of time to do assessment books. If a child gets all questions correct, it is a waste of time as the child learns nothing new. If a child gets 50% of the questions correct, the child will feel demotivated as he/she gets 50% of the questions wrong!

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sat, 07 Jul 2012 18:09:08 GMT

mummyscopio — Sat, 07 Jul 2012 18:09:08 GMT

Actually he said he wanted to finish it faster… So he can have his free time…

The first 2 times is for EL… He is a extremely fluent in EL but his written not so… Think he just didn’t know the answers so he copied…

3rd time was math… Which is a piece of cake for him
…

Its just that he is easily distracted… And when I am not sitting him…he can one whole life to finish something he can do in minutes…
He spent his allocated time dreaming so when he realized 2 hours had passed and I’m going to be done with my class… He just copy and finish his work quickly

Reply to P1 DS copied and lied on Sat, 07 Jul 2012 18:09:05 GMT

mummyscopio — Sat, 07 Jul 2012 18:09:05 GMT

He is not lazy… Just too dreamy and easily distracted…

Guess I have a lot of talking to do with him…

To date he had finishing 2 EL books, 3 math books and 4 CL books… And he had never copied till recently…
I know keeping the answers away well deter it from happening… But dun really liked the 治标不治本method…

Maybe I expected to much from him… But he #1… Have to be a rule model for #2, #3…