<![CDATA[Reasons to ask your maid to leave]]>Planning to ask my maid to leave ?

What are the reasons that you all usually says ? I’m afraid that she may mess up my household , how long must I pm her ?



Thanks for the help

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/topic/39787/reasons-to-ask-your-maid-to-leaveRSS for NodeSat, 25 Apr 2026 01:52:47 GMTMon, 27 Aug 2012 10:25:10 GMT60<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 12:44:00 GMT]]>Helpers fr any kampong nation once expose to Spore’s 花花世界 will be tempted. Not many after 2 years & more can resist temptations to own & have what the madam of the household has. When they’re tired fr working, get scolding fr not u’stand’g or adjusting to ano more advanced society, wld dream & wish to get beyond their situation. Then some start thinking they’re doing the housework on behalf of Madam so shld ‘be entitled’ to try out Madam‘s personal belongings.


Once I loss trust in my helper, I’ll send them home. They can find their way back but hv to learn a hard lesson so that they’ll behave more appropriately (hopefully) in the next eyer’s home.

I once met a Filipino helper here for a long time. She once admire the cakes I make & asks if she can buy my mixer if I ever sell them when I upgrade. Then, she made one remark that I shld hv no oroblem giving it to her with the comment that “you Sporeans ard all very rich anyway”. It was incredulous! I told her if I so decide to give my items away, it’s only if I hv the ability & wish to do so. But even if someone is truly rich, never assume that anyone shld want to part with their hard earned assets unless they wish to be generous.

I once interviewed a Mynmar girl who claimed she was abused to clean 2 homes but after our mtg, she was going on her Sunday date with a Caucasian.

I had an Indo 6 years back hired by recommendation of my previous Indo maid that she’s ready in Batam & can be mobilized over within the week. I made a mistake for the convenience. She was only 3 mths with my family but she was sent home bcoz her ex-eyer reported her for stealing her hubby’s foreign currencies. No substantial money was found in her belongings so police hv no hard evidence. In the 3 mths she was with me, she was ‘smuggling’ my Australian milo out. She didn’t want any beverage we buy for her morning b’fast, so we begin to suspect. Me bad. No idea where she brought them to nor if she sold it off. But this 30+ helper posses a bagful of gold jewelry not of local designs. I had to make a hard decision to send her str back to her home-country. She was begging not to be sent to Solo but just Batam. I was very firm that she shld be sent back to her hometown.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889323https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889323Mon, 17 Dec 2018 12:44:00 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 09:11:19 GMT]]>

phtthp:
haha ! got one time my friend went overseas to work. So, house was empty except her kindergarten daughter and her husband who came back from work at night.


Her maid went into her bedroom (while she overseas), took out my friend's sexy bikini swimming costume from wardrobe, guess what ?
wore friend's bikini and hopped onto her bed inside the Master bedroom, and called my friend's kindergarten daughter to take a photograph of her, posing and lying sexily on the bed
Filipinos? Haha, I have not encountered such daring maids, maybe Indon maids are more conservative.

Anyway, pulling a long face after being chided is one thing (and normal). But to the extent that the employer dreads going home so as to avoid seeing the helper, then it is a problem.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889297https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889297Mon, 17 Dec 2018 09:11:19 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 03:54:26 GMT]]>haha ! got one time my friend went overseas to work. So, house was empty except her kindergarten daughter and her husband who came back from work at night.


Her maid went into her bedroom (while she overseas), took out my friend’s sexy bikini swimming costume from wardrobe, guess what ?
wore friend’s bikini and hopped onto her bed inside the Master bedroom, and called my friend’s kindergarten daughter to take a photograph of her, posing and lying sexily on the bed

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889231https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889231Mon, 17 Dec 2018 03:54:26 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 03:34:58 GMT]]>

clioclio:
if it was a bad maid thru and thru, very easy...pack and go.

tough one is got good n bad qualities. I'm left thinking if I'm being petty. every body entitled to bad days. but it's my house why am I dreading to go home?!
All my subsequent maids are good, all are able to finish contract. Bad maids like what? Lazy? Unhygienic? All these can be trained lah.

This helper even visited the newborn after i gave birth at the hospital, thus, she treated my girls like her own.

A few times I overheard she screamed at my crying kiddos \"Go tell you mummy i slap you / i pull your ear!\" I endured all these nonsense because she was a very capable helper. All the way until finally, she decided to go back kampung on her own accord after years with us.

Think back, i felt stupid, capable so what? Why allow a maid to cause so much distress in my life.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889227https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889227Mon, 17 Dec 2018 03:34:58 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:50:13 GMT]]>if it was a bad maid thru and thru, very easy…pack and go.

tough one is got good n bad qualities. I’m left thinking if I’m being petty. every body entitled to bad days. but it’s my house why am I dreading to go home?!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889200https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889200Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:50:13 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:44:07 GMT]]>Maid issues are amongst the most difficult issues to solve, primarily because it is a people issue, and everyone is correct to a certain degree when considering the issue from their point of view. Whilst the employer has the right to command, it has to be tempered with the rights of the maid. Most of us are employers that think that MOM is on the side of the maid, but what choice does the institution really has? It has to be impartial and fair.

What is the ideal maid? One that does everything automatically as told or one who just need simple and short instructions? Smarter or more stupid? The fact is, there is different degrees of requirements, depending on the employer and the maid. I’ve seen how my wife (whom I think is very strict with maids she works with) treats other maids with respect, while there are strict employers who react the same strictness with all maids. I’d like to think of myself as a fair employer who treats everyone with respect, but for all I know, I may be doing something very wrong to someone out there. But when all is said and done, I think the luckiest family is one that have mutual respect with the maid where both parties respect one another.
Sigh, is it wistful thinking on a Monday morning?

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889198https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889198Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:44:07 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:14:02 GMT]]>Haha, this sharing remind me of Ruyi China drama series : how the wicked trusted maid of Ruyi managed to seduce Emperor, until she become a concubine herself, sit & become the same level as Ruyi, sharing the same husband. Ruyi trusted her maid so much. From maid, to competitor (rival), seeking favor of Emperor (same husband)


Never under-estimate maid, or what kind of political ambition they harbour, deep inside their ambitious heart.

Once hire a maid, u invited a stranger into your household, know your family secrets, know your personal life detailed info, in & out.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889188https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889188Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:14:02 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:09:29 GMT]]>

sky minecrafter:
Hello clioclio, I agree with leeyl... A gf had a domestic helper who thought she could make decisions on the lady-boss' behalf & even badmouthed her in front of the husband+mil, took over the twins like she was the birth-mother... There was a lot of stress.A helper should act with certain decorum, after all she only assists in the functioning of a family. You could ask the agency to inform her the truth behind her losing the job. If she wishes to continue working here for another household, she would need to decide whether she can manage her temperament.

Exactly, she behaved as if she was the 女主人 and the kids’ mother. There was a period of time I didn’t even dare to step out of the masterbedroom every morning.

So I have learnt my lesson. When a helper has climbed over your head and caused you so much fear and distress, I think it’s time she has to go, regardless how capable the helper is.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889187https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889187Mon, 17 Dec 2018 01:09:29 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Sun, 16 Dec 2018 15:00:12 GMT]]>Hello clioclio, I agree with leeyl... A gf had a domestic helper who thought she could make decisions on the lady-boss' behalf & even badmouthed her in front of the husband+mil, took over the twins like she was the birth-mother... There was a lot of stress. A helper should act with certain decorum, after all she only assists in the functioning of a family. You could ask the agency to inform her the truth behind her losing the job. If she wishes to continue working here for another household, she would need to decide whether she can manage her temperament.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889175https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889175Sun, 16 Dec 2018 15:00:12 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Sun, 16 Dec 2018 14:29:10 GMT]]>I can stand maids who are less capable whom I can slowly train but I can’t stand maids who are very capable but show employer black face!!


I used to have a vey capable maid who liked to show me black face. I was so scared of her until I avoided going home. She was the one and only maid I employed, who dared to go on hunger strike and hit my girls. But she’s also the maid who stayed with us for the longest period of time. I was naive then and was worried that the next maid would be worse.

Luckily, the next maid wasn’t that bad (after a month of training), maybe not as capable but I definitely felt so much happier and relieved.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889174https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889174Sun, 16 Dec 2018 14:29:10 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Sun, 16 Dec 2018 13:58:54 GMT]]>Reviving this thread…need some advice


I have a helper, will have done 3 years with us by Feb2019. close 1 eye -she’s acceptable in housework, getting all 4 kids ready for school / childcare n cooking. Can see she really cares for my youngest who is a toddler.

Problem is, when she not happy over smth we do her black face is legendary. Until like i dun feel like coming home from work to see her black face. It doesn’t happen frequently but when it happens, it’s so unpleasant.

When her contract was up a year ago, hubby wanted a change. but on aaccount of her doing a good job looking after youngest, we extended her contract. Then again, latest blow up in mid Nov…she black face for several days because she bought a box to ship stuff home. I told her to let me check b4 sealing. but one day I come home, it’s all packed n sealed! hubby made her unseal she threw a tantrum. the next day, I went to agency n selected a new helper. Takes up to 6-8weeks to come.

A few days later, after my helper anger simmer down, she S back to normal self. good with my children. I felt bad. but hubby reminded me…it’s only good UNTIL the next black face blow up.

She is going home leave in a couple of days. We tried to "encourage" her to do a transfer after she comes back. but she says no, she s happy here n likes the kids.

But new helper is on course to come soon around same time this black face helper returns. I don’t want to drop the bomb shell on her when she is home having reunion. it’s also good for her to be physically present for interview with potential employers if she is in SG. I think other than her black face, she is a competent worker.

So… what is the best excuse to tell her sorry she s not returning to SG to my family?
I can’t tell her I dun need helper anymore. with 4 kids n youngest so young… nobody will buy this story.
Is it very bad for helper to come back to SG only to be picked up by agent?
(I know I’m soft hearted. I’m just thinking if she comes back to SG with gifts for my kids I will feel v guilty)

thanks in advance

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889170https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1889170Sun, 16 Dec 2018 13:58:54 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Sun, 22 Feb 2015 06:15:02 GMT]]>Reading above posts make me feel better, I am not alone.

Had gone maid-less earlier than expected (supposed to be 2016Jan), thanks to 2 new maids (w SIN experience) in late 2014 after my old maid decided not to renew contract and plan to go to TW or HK.

Survived for 3mths without maid, very difficult to adjust for my family as they are "handicapped", for me only on cooking. It’s time for all at home to be independent.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1467912https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1467912Sun, 22 Feb 2015 06:15:02 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Sun, 22 Feb 2015 04:37:20 GMT]]>Aiyoh! Read the terms of agreement with the agent.

You are entitled to a replacement only if you let them recycle the problem to another employer.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1467894https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1467894Sun, 22 Feb 2015 04:37:20 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Sat, 21 Feb 2015 17:32:38 GMT]]>My friend found her maid stole things and was brought to the police. The agent refused to give her a replacement, even though the maid was less than 2 mths. Anyone has similar experience?

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1467828https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1467828Sat, 21 Feb 2015 17:32:38 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 01 Apr 2013 23:01:06 GMT]]>

Pin Head:
Find an excuse...but you dont even need any reasons, just ask her to leave.

if you are damn pissed, you do not need a reason to fire her...with the last 2 indonesian and filipino maids, i was boiling mad inside.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/978695https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/978695Mon, 01 Apr 2013 23:01:06 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Mon, 01 Apr 2013 14:15:44 GMT]]>Find an excuse…but you dont even need any reasons, just ask her to leave.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/978596https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/978596Mon, 01 Apr 2013 14:15:44 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Fri, 29 Mar 2013 01:21:19 GMT]]>My grandmother insisted on going home after her discharge yest…but aunt reserved a place in the nursing home…now trying to persuade granny to go there bcos there are facilities like nurses and oxygen (she has difficulty breathing)…most importantly, that damn maid is very mean.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976958https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976958Fri, 29 Mar 2013 01:21:19 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Fri, 29 Mar 2013 01:10:51 GMT]]>Btw in my previous post I also mention before my maid just put whatever she wants to eat in my shopping cart without telling me. She will grab peanut butter, cheese, fresh milk, a bag of fruits etc… So I don’t find the Prima Laska thingy surprising. At least yours will ask. My maid just simply plonk them in the cart and expect me to pay.

If u are a good maid you would have made sure all the food are consumed and not thrown away.

Aiya… When it comes to maid there is no end of grouses. Usually when an employer finds a good maid they will treat their maid well. So I really understand why some employers will come to this forum to release their built up frustrations here.
At least it’s a temporary stress reliever.

But some view these frustrations as personal attacks on maids. I hope people see the big picture.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976954https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976954Fri, 29 Mar 2013 01:10:51 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Fri, 29 Mar 2013 01:00:08 GMT]]>Very true, it’s so hard to get a good maid. If the maid is 60% capable I will still keep her. But maybe increment will be slower to come compared to if she is 80% capable.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976952https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976952Fri, 29 Mar 2013 01:00:08 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Wed, 27 Mar 2013 14:18:45 GMT]]>

POA Teacher:
janet_lee88:

[quote=\"isetan\"]Good and bad. Nursing home costs is much higher compare to hiring maid. But on the other hand, having maid to look after old folks may not be well taken care off.


Grandmother with dementia went out of the house while maid was in the room...she fell down and bruised herself. Aunt asked maid if she heard grandmother going out. Maid said she heard but lazy to go out to chase her.

No way would I keep a maid with that attitude.
You're lucky that grandma did not sustain serious injury. Or get lost.
It would have been bad enough if the maid was unaware that the old lady had walked out. But she knew but couldn't be bothered to stop her... :censored:[/quote]Wow the maid seems like the queen of the house . Still request for prima laksa . Nowadays very difficult to get good maid.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976306https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/976306Wed, 27 Mar 2013 14:18:45 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Tue, 26 Mar 2013 16:00:25 GMT]]>

mother777:

In my house I always tell maid, safety of children come before cleanliness and cooking. So watch children first. Once they are settled safely or sleeping then do cleaning or cooking job..

Cleaning and little bit tasteless good I can tolerate. But if children are hurt due to maid being negligent I will not tolerate..
My kitchen door has lock. She has to lock before cooking. I looked after kids when she had to cook. Break bowls or plates never mind...but kids cannot fall on slippery floor.

Children go to school or sleep, then can mop floor. No such thing as rushing to get housework done. They still get to sleep at 10pm...if they don't send SMS whole night.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975773https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975773Tue, 26 Mar 2013 16:00:25 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:53:38 GMT]]>If the present maid is really good in cooking and house hold job, then maybe you can try training her to follow grandma closely.


In my house I always tell maid, safety of children come before cleanliness and cooking. So watch children first. Once they are settled safely or sleeping then do cleaning or cooking job…

Cleaning and little bit tasteless good I can tolerate. But if children are hurt due to maid being negligent I will not tolerate…

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975768https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975768Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:53:38 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:42:15 GMT]]>

mother777:
Janet, yes I understand. I am not against keeping maids. It's just this \"happy go lucky\" attitude of maids which ticks me off.


There are some real good, caring and hardworking maids. Hope your grandmother can get such a maid to take care of her!

God bless her!
My grandmother is no hello kitty..a new one will not know how to cook. Prob is she has so many types of medicine to take. How to teach new maid? Filipino maids are supposedly more compassionate but this one sucks big time.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975754https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975754Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:42:15 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Reasons to ask your maid to leave on Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:36:08 GMT]]>Janet, yes I understand. I am not against keeping maids. It’s just this "happy go lucky" attitude of maids which ticks me off.


There are some real good, caring and hardworking maids. Hope your grandmother can get such a maid to take care of her!

God bless her!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975745https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/975745Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:36:08 GMT