Mawar:

Ideally, grandparents live next door. They have their own space, we have our own. No need to pay parking when visiting. The kids grow up with grandparents around. Grandparents see their grandchildren growing up. But come nightfall, each family say nitey-nite, and retreat behind own door.

MMM:

Imami:

Indeed, I agree - what's the point if parents just dump them at grandparents' place? I hv two colleagues on such arrangement. The kid now three and a half, has been at grandma's place since birth. He only return to his home on weekends. During the weekdays, he stay at grandma's home.


I find this a very uncomfortable scenario.

Another colleague, due to give birth this dec, will also be having such arrangement - either leave at nanny's place from Sunday night to Friday evening or at grandma's place, same thing check in Sunday night check our fri evening.

When I asked her the reason, she said because she could not imagine a life of not enough sleep. She said, if her sleep quality/quantity is compromised, she can't work. When I ask her, haven't she expected this prior to planning for a child ( someone\" accident\" then have a child, this couple plan for one)? She said no, never thought of it. :faint:

I supposed each family has their own arrangement and there is no right or wrong so long as they are comfortable and think it is the best arrangement for all.

My 3 kids were also weekends kids when they were younger. They would stay over at my mum's place from sunday night to friday evening. We would visit them every evening. We did that due to logistics reasons. They only moved home when they are in P1. Have we as a family suffered in terms of bonding???? I don't think so. They are close to grand ma and to us as well. As parents, we are also very involved.

So I don't think having such \"weekends kids\" arrangement means the parents are \"irresponsible\".

pirate:

Oppsgal:

Maybe the PR needs to stay for a longer period? Heard of somebody (citizen) married to a foreigner wife, but wife not allow to work in Singapore.

Once the wife is PR, she is allowed to work. What she has is probably a long-term social visit pass.

The reality on the ground is because the wife is not a PR, the family has to pay private rates even at KK. So, unless the Singaporean husband is rich, the family will probably deliver the baby back in the wife's country where she is likely to enjoy subsidized rates in a public hospital. The baby will then most likely acquire citizenship by birth of the wife's country. The Singaporean husband, unless he is lawyer, would probably not know that he has to register the baby with the Singapore consulate within one year from birth for the baby to have Singapore citizenship by descent.

There is a fall-back provision in Art 124 of the Constitution whereby the Government may register a child as a citizen of Singapore if the child is the child of a citizen of Singapore and is resident in Singapore. But if the family is not rich, how can they be reasonably expected to bring the child to live in Singapore when the child is neither a citizen or PR? On another long-term social visit pass? What if the child or mother gets sick? Is the family supposed to pay private rates for all those visits to a pediatrican for vaccinations?

And if baby no. 2 comes along, the mother goes back to wherever she came from again...? Child no. 1 follows mama back, and is no longer resident in Singapore. And then they are all accused of not keeping close ties with Singapore?

It's kind of a Catch-22 situation, especially when nobody but the ICAS seem to know what the criteria are.

Voila! In the end, Singapore loses another baby to the wife's country.

And that's how policies and red-tape can cascade on the ground to reach unintended consequences.

Oppsgal:

Maybe the PR needs to stay for a longer period? Heard of somebody (citizen) married to a foreigner wife, but wife not allow to work in Singapore.

Funz:

MMM:

[quote=\"Imami\"] Indeed, I agree - what's the point if parents just dump them at grandparents' place? I hv two colleagues on such arrangement. The kid now three and a half, has been at grandma's place since birth. He only return to his home on weekends. During the weekdays, he stay at grandma's home.


I find this a very uncomfortable scenario.

Another colleague, due to give birth this dec, will also be having such arrangement - either leave at nanny's place from Sunday night to Friday evening or at grandma's place, same thing check in Sunday night check our fri evening.

When I asked her the reason, she said because she could not imagine a life of not enough sleep. She said, if her sleep quality/quantity is compromised, she can't work. When I ask her, haven't she expected this prior to planning for a child ( someone\" accident\" then have a child, this couple plan for one)? She said no, never thought of it. :faint:

I supposed each family has their own arrangement and there is no right or wrong so long as they are comfortable and think it is the best arrangement for all.

My 3 kids were also weekends kids when they were younger. They would stay over at my mum's place from sunday night to friday evening. We would visit them every evening. We did that due to logistics reasons. They only moved home when they are in P1. Have we as a family suffered in terms of bonding???? I don't think so. They are close to grand ma and to us as well. As parents, we are also very involved.

So I don't think having such \"weekends kids\" arrangement means the parents are \"irresponsible\".

limlim:

pirate:

Somebody wrote in to the ST today that they have to pay foreigner rates giving birth at KK because the wife is foreigner, even though the baby is SC. The hospital reply is soli lah, it's MOH rule.


Doesn't MOH know that foreign spouses of SCs remain 'foreign' and cannot get PR usually because the SC spouse is deemed not likely to be able to financially support the foreign spouse? In other words, poor.

That's why, no point going to KK, just go to the nearest private hospital lah..

Anyway, the mother is foreigner rate, but the child shd be citizen rate right (baby ward charges etc)?

Also, regarding the PR.. income is not the only consideration.

There are cases where a high income couple were not successful because the length of stay could be too short etc..

resgmom:

pirate:

I suspect the children were not born in Singapore, that's why must register. And probably because Mr Salleh never studied Singapore's Constitution (surprise!), he failed to do that within one year.


If one reads Articles 121, 122, 123 and 129 of the Singapore Constitution, one realizes that there are different classes of Singapore Citizens with different rights. It is not true that all citizens are equal. :faint:

I am curious and looked at the http://statutes.agc.gov.sg/aol/search/display/view.w3p;ident=cb6a2b64-73d3-4839-a834-d31803e8a05f;query=Status%3Acurinforce%20Type%3Aact,sl%20Content%3A%22singapore%22%20Content%3A%22constitution%22;rec=1;resUrl=http%3A%2F%2Fstatutes.agc.gov.sg%2Faol%2Fsearch%2Fsummary%2Fresults.w3p%3Bquery%3DStatus%253Acurinforce%2520Type%253Aact,sl%2520Content%253A%2522singapore%2522%2520Content%253A%2522constitution%2522#P1X-.. There are different types of Singapore citizens (by birth, registration, etc), but I don't see any mentioning of the different rights? Please enlighten me?

MMM:

Imami:

Indeed, I agree - what's the point if parents just dump them at grandparents' place? I hv two colleagues on such arrangement. The kid now three and a half, has been at grandma's place since birth. He only return to his home on weekends. During the weekdays, he stay at grandma's home.


I find this a very uncomfortable scenario.

Another colleague, due to give birth this dec, will also be having such arrangement - either leave at nanny's place from Sunday night to Friday evening or at grandma's place, same thing check in Sunday night check our fri evening.

When I asked her the reason, she said because she could not imagine a life of not enough sleep. She said, if her sleep quality/quantity is compromised, she can't work. When I ask her, haven't she expected this prior to planning for a child ( someone\" accident\" then have a child, this couple plan for one)? She said no, never thought of it. :faint:

I supposed each family has their own arrangement and there is no right or wrong so long as they are comfortable and think it is the best arrangement for all.

My 3 kids were also weekends kids when they were younger. They would stay over at my mum's place from sunday night to friday evening. We would visit them every evening. We did that due to logistics reasons. They only moved home when they are in P1. Have we as a family suffered in terms of bonding???? I don't think so. They are close to grand ma and to us as well. As parents, we are also very involved.

So I don't think having such \"weekends kids\" arrangement means the parents are \"irresponsible\".

Imami:

Did I mention right or wrong or responsible/irresponsible?

MMM:

Imami:

Indeed, I agree - what's the point if parents just dump them at grandparents' place? I hv two colleagues on such arrangement. The kid now three and a half, has been at grandma's place since birth. He only return to his home on weekends. During the weekdays, he stay at grandma's home.


I find this a very uncomfortable scenario.

Another colleague, due to give birth this dec, will also be having such arrangement - either leave at nanny's place from Sunday night to Friday evening or at grandma's place, same thing check in Sunday night check our fri evening.

When I asked her the reason, she said because she could not imagine a life of not enough sleep. She said, if her sleep quality/quantity is compromised, she can't work. When I ask her, haven't she expected this prior to planning for a child ( someone\" accident\" then have a child, this couple plan for one)? She said no, never thought of it. :faint:

I supposed each family has their own arrangement and there is no right or wrong so long as they are comfortable and think it is the best arrangement for all.

My 3 kids were also weekends kids when they were younger. They would stay over at my mum's place from sunday night to friday evening. We would visit them every evening. We did that due to logistics reasons. They only moved home when they are in P1. Have we as a family suffered in terms of bonding???? I don't think so. They are close to grand ma and to us as well. As parents, we are also very involved.

So I don't think having such \"weekends kids\" arrangement means the parents are \"irresponsible\".

Imami:

Indeed, I agree - what's the point if parents just dump them at grandparents' place? I hv two colleagues on such arrangement. The kid now three and a half, has been at grandma's place since birth. He only return to his home on weekends. During the weekdays, he stay at grandma's home.


I find this a very uncomfortable scenario.

Another colleague, due to give birth this dec, will also be having such arrangement - either leave at nanny's place from Sunday night to Friday evening or at grandma's place, same thing check in Sunday night check our fri evening.

When I asked her the reason, she said because she could not imagine a life of not enough sleep. She said, if her sleep quality/quantity is compromised, she can't work. When I ask her, haven't she expected this prior to planning for a child ( someone\" accident\" then have a child, this couple plan for one)? She said no, never thought of it. :faint:

pirate:

I suspect the children were not born in Singapore, that's why must register. And probably because Mr Salleh never studied Singapore's Constitution (surprise!), he failed to do that within one year.


If one reads Articles 121, 122, 123 and 129 of the Singapore Constitution, one realizes that there are different classes of Singapore Citizens with different rights. It is not true that all citizens are equal. :faint:

limlim:

Apparently, that Mr Salleh is not a citizen. How committed they are to SG is a question..

pirate:

But the people I know the norm is less than six months. 5 years to get PR for spouse is not the norm.

pirate:

The more interesting question is why was Mr Mohamed Saif Mohamed Salleh's application to register his children as Singapore citizens not successful? Maybe somebody thinks we already have too many children who are citizens?

Mychildren:

I never ever think of what government really want us to do?

But instead thinking of what I want to do for my country, my family, my friends & to those that I don't even know.

nightlone:

sleepy:

I subscribed to the exact same thinking too!
Hence, become a SAHM

good for you! :rahrah: