<![CDATA[Really, must parents act so entitled?]]>Though I agree with the first sentence, What a juvenile piece of writing

And ST published this???

Thank God most youth I meet are not as immature as her.

http://www.straitstimes.com/the-big-story/singapore-population-2030/story/really-must-parents-act-so-entitled-20130131

Really, must parents act so entitled?
By Rachel Chang
One quality I've always considered integral in the Singaporean identity is an ironclad sense of entitlement.

Whatever we are given, we always want to know why we didn't get more. Maybe our schools have taught us too well that critical analysis is the only appropriate response to any statement.

And the most entitled people in this entitled population are Singaporean parents. They're fuelled by a potent mix of martyrdom and self-pity, salted over by a lack of sleep and intense body anxiety.

Because the national discourse is so relentlessly self-flagellating about the low birth rate, they are simultaneously self-congratulatory about having given their lives to something \"noble\", while intensely aware of how they are \"losing out\" by choosing to have kids in a childless nation.

This is like a multiple personality disorder, which they cope with by being convinced that they should be compensated twice over for starting a family.

Canvassing reactions to the enhanced Marriage and Parenthood Package for the news stories published last week was like taking a museum tour of Middle Class Entitled Parents. Those in this group seem to live by the creed that \"to those whom much has been given, much more should be given\".

In Singapore, primary and secondary school education is already almost free, and there are subsidies for pre-school for low-income families.

But the Entitled Parent seems to think that I, a childless taxpayer, should also pay for their childcare and kindergarten costs.

That's fine with me actually - as long as we also split your kid's pay cheque when he starts work.

And when told that they can rent subsidised flats from the Government while waiting for their own, some wondered why the flats couldn't be free, or why they couldn't be given priority for private housing.

I can hear it now, the favourite riposte of the childbearing: You don't understand because you don't have a kid.

It's true that I don't have personal knowledge of starting a family while running the Singapore rat race.

And I don't mean to denigrate the miracle of childbirth. In fact, I actually do want to be a mother one day.

But I don't see why the passage of another human being through my birth canal would magically entitle me to special treatment.

I respect parents and all the sacrifices they make for their kids, but come on, they're not amputees running a marathon, or quadriplegics painting watercolours with a brush in the mouth. I don't feel sufficiently moved by the plight of Singaporean parents to donate to their cause, which they seem to expect me to do. A tuition arms race and \"overly hard exam papers\" somehow do not arouse in me the sadness and desire to help that abused animals or victims of natural disasters do.

I must have a heart made of stone. (By the way, examinations are supposed to be difficult.)

When Singaporean parents ask for more, what I hear are people expecting to be paid for their adult choices.

But if that were the way the world works, then I am waiting on reimbursement for the holidays I've taken and the books and DVDs I've bought to fill up all my child-free time.

These won't even pay off in the future, as kids will. They're supposed to grow up and take care of you in your old age, right? My shoe collection won't do that.

But when I choose to buy a pair of shoes, I don't whine about a heels-unfriendly environment, or the lack of adequate shoe storage space in my flat, or shifting social mores that discourage shoe ownership.

The choice is mine, as are the consequences.

Don't get me wrong. I do think that improving the country's birth rate is an important societal goal.

But it isn't a pure public good that the state has the responsibility to pay for, like national defence.

It's more like tertiary education - there is some public benefit to society, but a lot of it is private benefit. Just like the way a university degree will pay for itself (unless you're an Arts student) in future income, kids will also pay you back.

Literally, like when they send the monthly cheque to the old folk's home. Or figuratively, in joy and hope, so on and so forth. Laughs and life lessons, et cetera.

Parents can certainly look forward to a meaningful, fulfilling life when they embark on the child-rearing journey, and I look forward to it one day too.

But that's about all they should feel entitled to.

Everything else is a bonus, and the least us childless taxpayers should get is a thank you.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/topic/50749/really-must-parents-act-so-entitledRSS for NodeTue, 21 Apr 2026 09:25:55 GMTThu, 31 Jan 2013 08:33:31 GMT60<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 13 Feb 2013 02:05:40 GMT]]>Something to chew on.....


http://economix.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/03/29/the-present-value-of-producing-future-taxpayers/

\"Parents aren’t just raising adorable kids. They are also producing little human capital units that are likely to grow up, get jobs, pay taxes and raise little human capital units of their own.

This production process isn’t measured by our economic accounting system, which ignores the value of unpaid work and treats parental expenditures on children as a form of personal consumption no different than expenditures on hot tubs or golden retrievers.

Still, many economists (including me) argue that nonparents derive some important benefits from the time, money and effort that parents expend.\".......

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/955266https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/955266Wed, 13 Feb 2013 02:05:40 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:29:11 GMT]]>

concern2:
slmkhoo:

[quote=\"3Boys\"]Babies I've never really minded.......


P-school kids, on the other hand...... :frustrated: :frustrated:

And don't even tell me the horror of teens, I aint there yet πŸ˜“

It's the opposite for me - I'm not too keen on babies, found my girls more interesting as they got older, and am enjoying their teens (now 13 and 16yo). I read their books, they tell me about their pop music, films, friends, hobbbies etc. I have to be the 'fierce mum' now and again, but less and less often as they grow older.

Girls different. For boys, they go through a stage when every time you see them you feel like smacking them.. πŸ˜‚[/quote]I have 2 teenage boys (14 and 16). I miss the time when they were toddlers but I also enjoy them now. They share about their school lives, friends, and we exchange our views on current affairs. As we coach them in their school work and guide them in things they do, we are also learning from them. Parenting is really a rewarding experience.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953934https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953934Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:29:11 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:55:33 GMT]]>

pirate:
ChiefKiasu:

[quote=\"pirate\"]You forgot \"Poop! Eeeeewwwwwwww!\" :faint:


πŸ˜‰

Quite so. I never knew digested milk could smell worse than digested-whatever-food-we-adults-eat until I became a dad. πŸ™‚

I never knew what went in white could come out various shades of green. πŸ˜†[/quote] :rotflmao: Wow, poops have their share of the limelight - How about those that could have virus and you gotta have it 'wrapped' and bring it to the paediatrician for inspection? πŸ˜†

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953920https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953920Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:55:33 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:53:17 GMT]]>

slmkhoo:
3Boys:

Babies I've never really minded.......


P-school kids, on the other hand...... :frustrated: :frustrated:

And don't even tell me the horror of teens, I aint there yet πŸ˜“

It's the opposite for me - I'm not too keen on babies, found my girls more interesting as they got older, and am enjoying their teens (now 13 and 16yo). I read their books, they tell me about their pop music, films, friends, hobbbies etc. I have to be the 'fierce mum' now and again, but less and less often as they grow older.

Girls different. For boys, they go through a stage when every time you see them you feel like smacking them.. πŸ˜‚

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953918https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953918Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:53:17 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Thu, 07 Feb 2013 09:51:44 GMT]]>

pirate:
ChiefKiasu:

[quote=\"pirate\"]You forgot \"Poop! Eeeeewwwwwwww!\" :faint:


πŸ˜‰

Quite so. I never knew digested milk could smell worse than digested-whatever-food-we-adults-eat until I became a dad. πŸ™‚

I never knew what went in white could come out various shades of green. πŸ˜†[/quote]Babies I've never really minded.......

P-school kids, on the other hand...... :frustrated: :frustrated:

And don't even tell me the horror of teens, I aint there yet πŸ˜“

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953872https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953872Thu, 07 Feb 2013 09:51:44 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Thu, 07 Feb 2013 01:06:03 GMT]]>

ChiefKiasu:


Quite so. I never knew digested milk could smell worse than digested-whatever-food-we-adults-eat until I became a dad. πŸ™‚
I suspect if you left milk expose to environment at room temperature for a few days.. it smells the same, digested or not.. :evil:

For e.g. a glass used for drinking milk with some residue it in left at the sink for a few days never wash............

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953525https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953525Thu, 07 Feb 2013 01:06:03 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Thu, 07 Feb 2013 00:49:02 GMT]]>

ChiefKiasu:
pirate:

You forgot \"Poop! Eeeeewwwwwwww!\" :faint:


πŸ˜‰

Quite so. I never knew digested milk could smell worse than digested-whatever-food-we-adults-eat until I became a dad. πŸ™‚

I never knew what went in white could come out various shades of green. πŸ˜†

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953512https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953512Thu, 07 Feb 2013 00:49:02 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 15:05:32 GMT]]>

pirate:
BeContented:

Only in private will you get to hear some comments like \"dun want the responsibility. I dun like kids. Like my current lifestyle......\" πŸ¦†


You forgot \"Poop! Eeeeewwwwwwww!\" :faint:

πŸ˜‰

Quite so. I never knew digested milk could smell worse than digested-whatever-food-we-adults-eat until I became a dad. πŸ™‚

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953415https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953415Wed, 06 Feb 2013 15:05:32 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 13:36:20 GMT]]>

BeContented:
Only in private will you get to hear some comments like \"dun want the responsibility. I dun like kids. Like my current lifestyle......\" πŸ¦†

You forgot \"Poop! Eeeeewwwwwwww!\" :faint:

πŸ˜‰

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953377https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953377Wed, 06 Feb 2013 13:36:20 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 13:27:07 GMT]]>

PoissonGal:
wonderm:

[quote=\"limlim\"]I'll say she's brave to venture into parents (kiasu ones some more) forum to express those views.. :evil:


But anyway, agree or disagree aside.. I find the article quite well written leh.. childish meh?

I feel she is entitled to voice her opinion/view..

So far, anyone counteract her article point by point? or just dismiss it as \"juvenile\" and that's it?

I didn't say I agree hor.. but find it interesting to read..

That's how I felt when I read the article. My main disagreement was that we parents didn't ask for all the goodies, so her anger was mis-directed. Or maybe there are yet-to-be parents who did ask for them. Anyway, it was an interesting read.

I have to agree with u here. πŸ˜„

Parents that I know do not ask for all the 'handouts'. I am just really curious as to who the misguided souls are who inform the gahmen that that is the way to go to increase the fertility rate.[/quote]
Watch documentaries & surveys. πŸ˜‰
Every time a microphone appear, the standard replies are
\"No money. Money not enough. Things too expensive. I need to have financial stability first. I need a house first to start family\" etc.

Only in private will you get to hear some comments like \"dun want the responsibility. I dun like kids. Like my current lifestyle......\" πŸ¦†

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953375https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953375Wed, 06 Feb 2013 13:27:07 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 11:50:13 GMT]]>

wonderm:
limlim:

I'll say she's brave to venture into parents (kiasu ones some more) forum to express those views.. :evil:


But anyway, agree or disagree aside.. I find the article quite well written leh.. childish meh?

I feel she is entitled to voice her opinion/view..

So far, anyone counteract her article point by point? or just dismiss it as \"juvenile\" and that's it?

I didn't say I agree hor.. but find it interesting to read..

That's how I felt when I read the article. My main disagreement was that we parents didn't ask for all the goodies, so her anger was mis-directed. Or maybe there are yet-to-be parents who did ask for them. Anyway, it was an interesting read.

I have to agree with u here. πŸ˜„

Parents that I know do not ask for all the 'handouts'. I am just really curious as to who the misguided souls are who inform the gahmen that that is the way to go to increase the fertility rate.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953350https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953350Wed, 06 Feb 2013 11:50:13 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 10:05:56 GMT]]>No lah. More like the feature editor said, we need 2 articles on parenthood thingy. You two sweet young things, pointing at the male and female rookies, take contrarian views. To make it interesting, let’s twist the maternal instinct stuff. The guy takes the for position while the lady against. Get cracking and get some attention!! Mainstream readership is slipping, make sure the you ruffle some feathers in the social media!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953334https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953334Wed, 06 Feb 2013 10:05:56 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 09:47:26 GMT]]>

limlim:
I'll say she's brave to venture into parents (kiasu ones some more) forum to express those views.. :evil:


But anyway, agree or disagree aside.. I find the article quite well written leh.. childish meh?

I feel she is entitled to voice her opinion/view..

So far, anyone counteract her article point by point? or just dismiss it as \"juvenile\" and that's it?

I didn't say I agree hor.. but find it interesting to read..
That's how I felt when I read the article. My main disagreement was that we parents didn't ask for all the goodies, so her anger was mis-directed. Or maybe there are yet-to-be parents who did ask for them. Anyway, it was an interesting read.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953325https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953325Wed, 06 Feb 2013 09:47:26 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 09:42:59 GMT]]>

limlim:
I'll say she's brave to venture into parents (kiasu ones some more) forum to express those views.. :evil:


But anyway, agree or disagree aside.. I find the article quite well written leh.. childish meh?

I feel she is entitled to voice her opinion/view..

So far, anyone counteract her article point by point? or just dismiss it as \"juvenile\" and that's it?

I didn't say I agree hor.. but find it interesting to read..
Actually, I largely agree with you on this limlim. I don't think the article is well written, but it takes a poke at the so-called 'entitlement culture' of parents. The writer has taken it much too far, but all the same, I suppose some parents have also waved the entitlement flag much too enthusiastically.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953322https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953322Wed, 06 Feb 2013 09:42:59 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 09:35:21 GMT]]>I'll say she's brave to venture into parents (kiasu ones some more) forum to express those views.. :evil:


But anyway, agree or disagree aside.. I find the article quite well written leh.. childish meh?

I feel she is entitled to voice her opinion/view..

So far, anyone counteract her article point by point? or just dismiss it as \"juvenile\" and that's it?

I didn't say I agree hor.. but find it interesting to read..

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953320https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953320Wed, 06 Feb 2013 09:35:21 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:50:11 GMT]]>

Harlequin:
concern2:

[quote=\"PoissonGal\"]

Omg! That's very adult-like behavior. Resorting to such lameness

It takes a parent to know a parent! πŸ˜†

Hahaha.... :hi5: C2's quick wit never ceased to amaze me![/quote] :celebrate: Always takes 2 to clap!

Ok lah, we won't go :offtopic: for the sake of proper exchange of views. Name-calling has the potential of thread being embargoed, and posts being removed. Adults must behave like adults, setting proper examples for younger ones to follow, right? πŸ˜‚ πŸ¦†

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953304https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953304Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:50:11 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:47:35 GMT]]>Hahahaha… you are a funny boy!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953301https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953301Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:47:35 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:41:38 GMT]]>

Harlequin:
Hah! No offense. I was replying to pirate, whom we are not sure er er er er... :evil:

Everyone here knows I am only 6 years old. πŸ•Ί

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953298https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953298Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:41:38 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:36:24 GMT]]>

concern2:
PoissonGal:



Omg! That's very adult-like behavior. Resorting to such lameness

It takes a parent to know a parent! πŸ˜†

Hahaha.... :hi5: C2's quick wit never ceased to amaze me!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953293https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953293Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:36:24 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:33:26 GMT]]>Me and Concern2 were drawn off-topic to guess what fish girl is that unforgettable for Pirate.


Yap! Quite lame, but this is our fun…time!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953288https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953288Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:33:26 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:31:47 GMT]]>

PoissonGal:
Harlequin:

[quote=\"pirate\"]Solli solli hor. Suddenly I cannot get the image of a fish girl out of my mind. :heresmyfish:


:rotflmao: that's what fishes are for :rotflmao:

Omg! That's very adult-like behavior. Resorting to such lameness[/quote]It takes a parent to know a parent! πŸ˜†

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953284https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953284Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:31:47 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:31:05 GMT]]>

PoissonGal:
Harlequin:

[quote=\"pirate\"]Solli solli hor. Suddenly I cannot get the image of a fish girl out of my mind. :heresmyfish:


:rotflmao: that's what fishes are for :rotflmao:

Omg! That's very adult-like behavior. Resorting to such lameness[/quote]Hah! No offense. I was replying to pirate, whom we are not sure er er er er... :evil:

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953283https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953283Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:31:05 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:28:22 GMT]]>

Harlequin:
pirate:

Solli solli hor. Suddenly I cannot get the image of a fish girl out of my mind. :heresmyfish:


:rotflmao: that's what fishes are for :rotflmao:

Omg! That's very adult-like behavior. Resorting to such lameness

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953282https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953282Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:28:22 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Really, must parents act so entitled? on Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:05:38 GMT]]>Ah... :idea: Merlion?


:rotflmao:

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953268https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/953268Wed, 06 Feb 2013 08:05:38 GMT