<![CDATA[loan gone bad...]]>

zbear:
hquek:

If friendship is determined whether I want to fund another person's life, then I rather not. It's really tough but I rather not mix money and friendship.



I agree. But what if the borrower is your sibling who is close to you? How to say No?

then have to see why need loan. I have seen aged parents who needed to go out to work because the adult child lost money gambling, borrowed from loansharks. Can continue to finance such life style? another case I can think of is when a person lives an excessive life style, in such instance, should I eat soy sauce rice to support someone else's french dining?

I guess if it's a medical emergency or perhaps for further studies, I would be fine tightening my own belt. but I can see it's really tough to get money back. My parents used to loan money to a sibling. loan $1k, return 100, 150 over time...balance of 10-20% will forget such a loan ever existed.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/topic/77463/loan-gone-badRSS for NodeSat, 12 Sep 2026 22:29:23 GMTThu, 17 Nov 2016 05:08:04 GMT60<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Thu, 17 Nov 2016 00:45:41 GMT]]>

hquek:
If friendship is determined whether I want to fund another person's life, then I rather not. It's really tough but I rather not mix money and friendship.


I agree. But what if the borrower is your sibling who is close to you? How to say No?

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733641https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733641Thu, 17 Nov 2016 00:45:41 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Wed, 16 Nov 2016 23:43:38 GMT]]>I’ve found a way to deal with this :


- Give a small amount that you can live without, eg. if they ask for $1000, tell them you can only afford to loan $100 or $200
- This limits your loss in the event it does not come back
- Main advantage is that it also prevents a future repeat
- If the requester asks for another loan, you can always say that they haven’t returned the previous one yet and that you are still waiting for that to pay your bills
- If they do return it, then you can repeat this for future loans

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733635https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733635Wed, 16 Nov 2016 23:43:38 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Wed, 16 Nov 2016 10:10:56 GMT]]>If friendship is determined whether I want to fund another person’s life, then I rather not. It’s really tough but I rather not mix money and friendship.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733554https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733554Wed, 16 Nov 2016 10:10:56 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Wed, 16 Nov 2016 07:55:25 GMT]]>depending on your relationship with the person. relationship may be affected if reject to help.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733523https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1733523Wed, 16 Nov 2016 07:55:25 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Mon, 04 Aug 2014 01:55:51 GMT]]>I’d learnt many yr ago that lending $$ to friend should be prepared to write off, regardless of how much it is…


If the amt is not huge, suggest you write it off, and don’t let it bother you too much. If he returns it in future, good; else, forget it.

If the amt is huge, then it’s gonna be difficult for him to return it now anyway (he wouldn’t have needed to borrow if he’s not in bad shape). Even if you pressure him, he can continue to ignore/avoid you. In any case, don’t thin you will have any legal doc to support your claim if he were to turn around and deny it, right?

It’s likely to worsen relation, without any real benefit.

The only problem is with your hubby. Try to talk to him to say you’ve learnt your lesson and get him to move on too…

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1350997https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1350997Mon, 04 Aug 2014 01:55:51 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Sat, 02 Aug 2014 14:21:27 GMT]]>loan him cause he said he needed to buy diapers n what not yea letting this go guess the friendship will not be like before, no more loaning even if its close frens

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1350020https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1350020Sat, 02 Aug 2014 14:21:27 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Sat, 02 Aug 2014 05:39:20 GMT]]>If you don’t mind me saying - why do you lend gf’s hubby without asking your gf first? Are you closer to him than to her?


Indeed, its going to be very awkward in future.

BTW, its very common for debtors to be MIA abt payment becos they will not have the $$$ to return n its pointless to make empty promises to you knowing that they wont be able to pay at all.

If you think you can afford to give charity, then why not close this chapter? If you still want their friendship, then pretend that nothing happened. If you feel you are better off without them, then stop being friends.

Sorry if I sound harsh, but this is the way I will handle the situation.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1349666https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1349666Sat, 02 Aug 2014 05:39:20 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 09:02:47 GMT]]>

starlight1968sg:
Totally agreed with 借钱就要准备别人不还,否则别借.

i am ok with the loan not being paid is just i guess is going to be very awkward the next time if we see each other dont u agree jut feel disappointed if a reply of i cannot make it this time can u give me more time i am ok or even i dont think i am able to pay u back is also ok just dont go MIA like this

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348903https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348903Fri, 01 Aug 2014 09:02:47 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 08:49:14 GMT]]>Totally agreed with 借钱就要准备别人不还,否则别借.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348872https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348872Fri, 01 Aug 2014 08:49:14 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 08:39:36 GMT]]>At first he wanted to borrow a larger amount i directly said i dont have that much on hand then we settle on a smaller amount though not huge la but honestly feel disappointed, i do not know how too approach my gf cause later she might just turn around and ask me why i so silly to loan her hubby and what not and later end up they start quarreling also like not nice, i am lucky hubby just show unhappiness for now he have not voice out but he might and since last night the wa he never reply till now so am also at my wits end already.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348854https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348854Fri, 01 Aug 2014 08:39:36 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 04:05:26 GMT]]>June…world cup…

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348446https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348446Fri, 01 Aug 2014 04:05:26 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 03:24:31 GMT]]>If he has to borrow from wife's gf.. ...guess you wouldn't be the only one.

How about talking to your gf about it?
From 3 days paying back to more than 30 still no news.. ... :moneyflies:
Hope it is not a big amount.. ...

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348356https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348356Fri, 01 Aug 2014 03:24:31 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 03:16:24 GMT]]>

finnfinn:
should be... 借錢容易，還錢難

Thank you for pointing out the error! I will make the correction.

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348341https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348341Fri, 01 Aug 2014 03:16:24 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 02:45:31 GMT]]>should be… 借錢容易，還錢難

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348279https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348279Fri, 01 Aug 2014 02:45:31 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to loan gone bad... on Fri, 01 Aug 2014 02:33:49 GMT]]>Sorry to hear what you are going through.


This is how I treat money being borrowed to friends/relatives

There is a saying in Chinese

\"借钱就要准备别人不还,否则别借.
　　另救急不救穷,借给穷人就别指望还了,不然朋友都没的做\".

So with this in my mind , I will normally pass my friend in need of $$$$ not more than SGD100 and tell them this is the best I can do for them.

If they pay back ,I consider myself lucky. If not treat as charity.

Hope this will help you when encountered the same situation.

Always bear this in mind - 借钱容以,还钱难!

]]>https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348245https://forum.kiasuparents.com/post/1348245Fri, 01 Aug 2014 02:33:49 GMT