Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Sun, 01 Mar 2020 13:59:55 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Sun, 01 Mar 2020 13:59:55 GMT

SeongheeKim\" post_id=\"1965440\" time=\"1582982148\" user_id=\"180737:

SINGAPORE MINDFULNESS CONFERENCE 2020
https://www.eventbrite.sg/e/singapore-mindfulness-conference-2020-22-23-august-tickets-85065949545

Thank you for sharing! Do you have a promo code to share as well?

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Sat, 29 Feb 2020 13:15:48 GMT

SeongheeKim — Sat, 29 Feb 2020 13:15:48 GMT

SINGAPORE MINDFULNESS CONFERENCE 2020

https://www.eventbrite.sg/e/singapore-mindfulness-conference-2020-22-23-august-tickets-85065949545

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Sun, 24 Sep 2017 09:02:57 GMT

Linda.04609128 — Sun, 24 Sep 2017 09:02:57 GMT

Mindfulness has always been the talk of school and part of parenting techniques these days. Just sharing the upcoming program my child's yoga school is conducting during the holidays period. For more information, you can refer to the flyer. :goodpost:

https://s26.postimg.org/o0kxvdrwp/Yoga_and_Mindfulness_Workshop.jpg\">

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Thu, 29 Sep 2016 05:20:43 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Thu, 29 Sep 2016 05:20:43 GMT

I was cleaning my room when I came across this slip of paper I had torn from a page in Reader's Digest (RD Family, p. 138) many, many years ago. I saw the title and I smiled to myself. It was thanks to this paper that I am able to practise saying no, and prioritise better.

The most part of our lives is about decision-making. It can get overwhelming when we just say YES! to everything. Saying No (politely, of course), is a way to protect yourself from undue stress and overload.
[quote]Just Say No

When my son was two, there were times when I told him to do something and he just said, \"No.\" I'd look at him in amazement, admiring his courage and amused by his audacity. There's an irony here: Small children have less trouble saying no than most adults do. A second irony is that when people can't say no, they often end up feeling overloaded and resentful. However, those who are able to say no have less pressure and feel more in control.
Learning to say no doesn't mean we have to become difficult and uncooperative. After all, collaboration and teamwork are essential in the workplace. Saying no is about recognizing our limits and being selective. You can even say it in a way people will accept without actually using the word no:

Express your wish to comply: \"I'd like to do that for you\", \"I wish I could help\"
Give an explanation: \"I'm working on a tight deadline.\"
Offer an alternative: \"I can't help you now, but I can do it next Tuesday.\"
Ask your boss to prioritise: \"Which of these projects would you like me to set aside in order to do this one?\"[/quote]Excerpt from The Little Book of Stress Relief (Key Porter Books) by Dr David Posen

Give it a try from today! If ever you need the courage/motivation to say no, or a role model, just turn to your two-year-old and ask him to eat his veggies.

Happy Midweek!

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Mon, 08 Aug 2016 05:51:16 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 05:51:16 GMT

One thing that a Taurus like me hates more than people wasting their time, is when things change because of people. Change is a VERY big word for me. I prefer to stick to my normal routine; the habit of doing things \"the right way\". Suddenly not knowing how to do anything about the change can throw me into an emotional spiral aka Panic Mode.

http://thelightquotient.com/ started The Light Quotient as a way to bring personalised coaching to women. Integrated Coaching is a holistic, transformational system consisting of coaching and energy work. You can transform your life and create lasting change by learning to integrate your body, mind, and spirit, so you can perform at your very best in all situations.

She shares http://thelightquotient.com/blog/2016/7/22/bracing-for-change-how-to-prepare-for-your-next-phase to help you make the most out of change.

1. Reflect
Be true and ask yourself these assertive questions:
How did I get here?
Is this where I want to be?
Now that I’m here, what’s next?

When you have an idea of who you are and want to be, one of life’s biggest hurdles is out of the way.

2. Reframe
When faced with change, especially unexpected change, many emotions can overwhelm you; self-doubt, frustration, disappointment, to name a few. Do not push them away and pretend they do not exist (This is a good time to do some mindfulness)! Ask yourself: What is the underlying trigger? Once you have it figured out, the next move is to reframe the situation in a way that serves you.
It is not about putting up with things you hate, especially if you have no reason to. If you have encountered change, each experience, no matter big or small, is an invaluable learning experience.
[quote]You will need some creativity (and lots of deep breathing) to reframe your experience to make sense of it and see it from that light.
- Avalyn Lim, founder of The Light Quotient[/quote]3. Reboot

Unfortunately we cannot turn back time to undo a change, but we can move forward with a reboot. Acknowledge, and embrace the change. Each change is an opportunity to let go of past expectations and start anew.

Reboot by reviewing and renewing your personal mission statement: What motivates you? What calls to you? What do you want to learn? How do you want to reach the next stage of your life/career?

Change is scary, but it is also exciting and full of endless possibilities. So embrace it!
Need some help? You can approach Avalyn http://thelightquotient.com/what-is-coaching.

All the best in the transition to a new chapter in your lives!

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Thu, 21 Jul 2016 05:32:05 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Thu, 21 Jul 2016 05:32:05 GMT

Lately I have been experiencing low mood, since work has been horrible. I also procrastinated a lot of things I wanted to do, even for myself, choosing sleep instead. Ironically, sleeping more did not help me feel better

Ongoing and persistent low mood can lead to depression, which is a growing malaise of the 21st century. Symptoms (five or more, lasting for two or more weeks) include:[list]

Becoming upset for no specific reason
Suicidal thoughts
Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, anxiety, irritability
Loss of interest and pleasure
Difficulty/inability to concentrate/indecisiveness
Sleep disturbance - waking up earlier or sleeping longer than usual
Increase/decrease of weight
General tiredness upon waking/loss of energy

[/list]As soon as I recognized these symptoms, I picked up my mindfulness book to search for a solution.
[quote]Breath is life energy. When we restrict our breathing, we diminish our life energy. Without breath, there is no more life. [/quote]If you take some time to 'befriend' your breathing, you will notice that you have shallow breathing during periods of low mood. When you learn to manage your breath, you can make a difference to how you feel. With a kind, forgiving and accepting attitude towards yourself, continue 'watching your breathing', and you may feel re-energized and ready to face the day with joy, zest and enthusiasm.

So try this exercise the next time you have extra time in bed, before starting your day:
(Adapted from Journey into Mindfulness by Dr Patrizia Collard)

Gentle Chest Opener
1. Roll up a bath towel and place it lengthwise on your blanket or yoga mat. Sit with your buttocks on the end of it, and then, supporting yourself with your arms, lower your spine over the rolled-up towel. Ensure you are resting on the entire towel, from the tailbone to the top of the head.
2. The arms are by your side, either close to the body or touching the outer edge of the mat, or even extended to make a T-shape. Your legs are bent or stretched; you can have a rolled-up blanket under your knees to support the back of your legs. Relax the legs so they fall open. If your head tilts backwards and your neck feels tight, place a pillow under your head.
3. You are now opening your chest, and this can help you to enhance your breathing. It will also help you very gently and compassionately to reverse the close-down posture that often goes along with low mood. Stay here for 5-15 minutes.
4. To finish, roll over onto your side, moving the towel to the side. Finally, roll over onto your back again, and feel any sensations in your back and chest.

During this exercise, avoid tensing your body, and pay attention to your neck and shoulders. To ensure you remain comfortable, you can place your hands gently on your stomach, or spread them out wide.

I am going to try this out as soon as I reach home tonight. And you should too, so you can share your experience!

I will now leave you with these lyrics by Ann-Marie Gilkes. Have a good week ahead![quote]Life is ever changing
There are endings and new beginnings
Keeping hopes, keeping hopes alive

And like evolution
Change is a solution
Changing, changing to survive

And we know
Know that change can bring
Sorrow
Poisoning everything
And wise heads say
We should try to accept what we cannot change
And wise heads say
We should try to accept what we cannot change

Change is time in motion
Heading in one direction
As we grow, learn and strive
Changing, changing to survive[/quote]

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Thu, 07 Jul 2016 00:58:58 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Thu, 07 Jul 2016 00:58:58 GMT

Hi everyone! How has your mindfulness experience been?

I met a new friend recently, and he shared about how he reached enlightenment during meditation. I was intrigued as I learnt about karma. Karma is a Sanskrit word which refers to the spiritual principle of cause and effect; where the intent and actions, work or deed of an individual (cause) influence the future of that individual (effect). I fully believe in it and will work hard to lead a happier life, so that I can reap good karma.

I came across this interesting infographic How to Train Your Brain for Happiness (http://newsnetwork.mayoclinic.org/discu ... happiness/), and I am going to share it here as I feel it can complement our mindfulness journey.

Dana Sparks shares that 'Happiness is the combination of present moment experiences and overall life satisfaction\". Although the brain is hardwired to focus on threats and imperfections, we can flip the switch with the 5-3-2 Plan.

5 People
Start each day with gratitude - The moment you wake up, focus on 5 people whom you are grateful for, 'see' them in your mind and silently thank them

3 Minutes
Find novelty where love is - At the end of your day, spend three minutes meeting your loved ones. Be genuinely interested and creatively praise them

2 Seconds
See others differently - Mentally say 'I wish you well' the first second you meet someone. Choose a positive frame before your mind judges negatively.

You have the power to change your own life. When you make it a habit to cultivate gratitude and compassion in your life, happiness will find you. So move from 'Default', and train your brain to switch to 'Focused Mode' , and these positive neural connections will eventually become your new 'normal'.

Here's wishing you well! Peace be with you.

Signing off :imanangel:

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Wed, 04 May 2016 00:40:11 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Wed, 04 May 2016 00:40:11 GMT

[quote]
Deep peace of the running wave to you
Deep peace of the flowing air to you
Deep peace of the quiet earth to you
Deep peace of the shining stars to you
Deep peace of the gentle night to you
Moon and stars pour their healing light on you
Deep peace to you
Deep peace to you

- Anonymous[/quote]I remember the first few days of my new job, when I was expected to prepare some documents, and the printer just wasn't working. I was on the verge of crying, and I didn't realize I was being very negative until I noticed the reactions of those around me. I then decided to do some deep breathing while walking around the office. With each deep breath I took, I felt the stress melt away; with each deep breath, I felt less hysterical, and calmer.

It was magical, how a single breath could immediately change the way I felt. Breathing comes free, but we often take it for granted when it is such an intangible, yet important part of our lives. Let's learn how we can do Mindful Breathing when you are feeling ill, or just stressed out like I was (excerpt from Journey Into Mindfulness by Dr Patrizia Collard):

1. Lie on your back with your legs stretched out and allow yourself to be totally relaxed. Alternatively, you may want to sit in a comfortable position, using pillows, if you wish, for support.

2. When you are inhaling, open your toes like a flower opening to the sunshine. Do, please, use your imagination. When you are exhaling, scrunch your toes as if the flower is closing. If you tend to get cramps, do the closing action very gently.

3. When you are inhaling, softly point your toes away from you, and when you are exhaling, flex your feet to bring them perpendicular to the floor.

4. Curl the ankles in each direction, clockwise and anticlockwise.

The simple co-ordination of breath and movement will slowly bring back your energy and help you get back on your feet. So give it a try, and share your experiences! Here's ending this post with another poem:
[quote]Peace
There is only silence
On the mountain tops
Among the tips of the trees
You perceive barely a breath
Even the birds in the forest
Keep still and are silent
Wait then
Just a little while longer
And you too
Will find peace at last.

- J. W. von Goethe
(translated by Dr Patrizia Collard)[/quote]

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Thu, 28 Apr 2016 03:43:37 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Thu, 28 Apr 2016 03:43:37 GMT

Thank you @boinbi and @Tutor_G.

Do try these mindfulness techniques and share your experiences. Over time, I will share more techniques and information about mindfulness. Let’s use this post to spread the word and share pointers and good ideas!

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Thu, 28 Apr 2016 02:47:20 GMT

Tutor_G — Thu, 28 Apr 2016 02:47:20 GMT

Thanks for sharing the good post.

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Tue, 26 Apr 2016 14:21:36 GMT

boinbi — Tue, 26 Apr 2016 14:21:36 GMT

Watching…

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Fri, 22 Apr 2016 00:31:33 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Fri, 22 Apr 2016 00:31:33 GMT

Joy of Learning 111:
Hi BloomSchoolSG

You have made some interesting posts. Thank you for sharing.

I think it is important to be clear about what is meant by ‘attention’. If we mean ‘concentration’ then that is not the relaxed awareness of mindfulness meditation; indeed, it is the opposite.

From a mental health point of view, what is being sought in mindfulness is a distancing of the Self and the thoughts/emotions that arise in consciousness. We should be aware of the thoughts/emotions, but not dwell on and be led by them. If they are negative thoughts/emotions, we add fuel to the fire by concentrating on them. Rather, we should let them slip away from us down the flowing river.

I like to use this analogy. Imagine you are standing outside your front door about to enter. You hear your loved one inside the house loudly proclaiming his/her undying love for another. You are utterly enraged. You kick down the door (!) to confront the betrayer. However, you see inside that he/she is rehearsing a play with members of the local theatrical group. Your anger dissipates and flows away.

In mindfulness meditation, we seek to pause and reflect for a few moments whether the arising thought/emotion is something we wish to indulge or to let flow away. If it is a positive thought/emotion, then we probably do wish to indulge it, but we do not over-indulge it: Mindfulness helps us to appreciate that our minds are subject to delusion or misrepresentation, so we have to maintain our inner citadel of tranquillity.

Good mental health!

Hi there!

Thank you for your response! Indeed you have an interesting analogy, and I agree with you. In mindfulness, we do not concentrate on our issues. Instead, we acknowledge the existence of these problems, then we take a step back to immerse ourselves \"in-the-now\", so that we can, later, tackle these issues in a calmer state of mind.
Let me just build on your sharing with this quote from the same book I have shared previously, by Dr Patrizia Collard:
[quote]The practice of mindfulness helps us to enter a state of acceptance, where we are able to give ourselves a break from distress and enter periods of calm, so we can simply enjoy being alive. Living moment by moment, seeing and feeling everything afresh, without judgement and worry, let's experience life rather than simply getting through it.[/quote]Let's try this new practice today: Everyday mindfulness
For this exercise, I want to invite you to pick as a focus, a new aspect of your life; something you have not paid much attention to before.
For ten minutes or so, take a look at a particular leaf on a tree, or a stone, flower, or plant. Or think about that piece of furniture you love, and wonder how it came into being, and think about how many people were involved in its creation.

I have been using this app called Fabulous, to help me keep my mindfulness habit in check. Lately I have been consumed by work, and then tend to skip doing mindfulness, until I suddenly realize I have gotten too hysterical from the stress. So remember, mindfulness takes practice, so do not be disheartened if you felt you are not doing so well.

Please continue sharing your experiences, and I will continue to share different ways we can experience freedom from stress and worries.

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Wed, 30 Mar 2016 02:32:19 GMT

MrsKiasu — Wed, 30 Mar 2016 02:32:19 GMT

Interesting…yeah…let all those negative emotions slip away in the flowing water…not easy but will try.

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Wed, 30 Mar 2016 01:59:25 GMT

Joy of Learning 111 — Wed, 30 Mar 2016 01:59:25 GMT

Hi BloomSchoolSG

You have made some interesting posts. Thank you for sharing.

I think it is important to be clear about what is meant by ‘attention’. If we mean ‘concentration’ then that is not the relaxed awareness of mindfulness meditation; indeed, it is the opposite.

From a mental health point of view, what is being sought in mindfulness is a distancing of the Self and the thoughts/emotions that arise in consciousness. We should be aware of the thoughts/emotions, but not dwell on and be led by them. If they are negative thoughts/emotions, we add fuel to the fire by concentrating on them. Rather, we should let them slip away from us down the flowing river.

I like to use this analogy. Imagine you are standing outside your front door about to enter. You hear your loved one inside the house loudly proclaiming his/her undying love for another. You are utterly enraged. You kick down the door (!) to confront the betrayer. However, you see inside that he/she is rehearsing a play with members of the local theatrical group. Your anger dissipates and flows away.

In mindfulness meditation, we seek to pause and reflect for a few moments whether the arising thought/emotion is something we wish to indulge or to let flow away. If it is a positive thought/emotion, then we probably do wish to indulge it, but we do not over-indulge it: Mindfulness helps us to appreciate that our minds are subject to delusion or misrepresentation, so we have to maintain our inner citadel of tranquillity.

Good mental health!

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Sat, 26 Mar 2016 15:48:31 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Sat, 26 Mar 2016 15:48:31 GMT

How has your mindfulness experience been? I hope you have been experiencing the benefits.

I have tried mindfulness a few times now, but my mind still wanders way too easily. Even within a span of just one minute during my bus ride, staring at trees by the road, my mind can wander at least three times, suddenly remembering ‘Oh, I needed to do that…’.

Remember, mindfulness does not have to be for long periods. It can be as short as one minute; but we want it to be a fulfilling one minute. My therapist has shared one good way to destress-in-a-minute; all you have to do is to follow the minute hand of an analog clock and count down one minute. I do not usually wear an analog watch, so I follow the decreasing numbers of my stopwatch app on my phone. When I could visually and mentally focus on the numbers, my mind has less tendencies to stray.

Of course, I am still learning and practising these various methods of mindfulness. Let’s continue to share our experiences, thoughts and ideas, to create awareness of mindfulness and to share the benefits of practising it.

Reply to Using mindfulness to cope with our stressful lives on Tue, 01 Mar 2016 08:35:43 GMT

BloomSchoolSG — Tue, 01 Mar 2016 08:35:43 GMT

Today, let's learn the Mindful S.T.O.P, popularized by Elisha Goldstein, a clinical psychologist, and author of Uncovering Happiness: Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self-Compassion (Atria Books, 2015), The Now Effect (Atria Books, 2012), Mindfulness Meditations for the Anxious Traveler (Atria Books, 2013), and co-author of A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook (New Harbinger, 2010).

S.T.O.P is the acronym for
Stop what you are doing; put things down for a minute or two
Take a few deep breaths for a minute
Observe and acknowledge your thoughts, feelings and emotions at the moment
Proceed with an activity that will support you in the moment; call a friend, or have a cup of tea

You can read the original article in its entirety on http://www.mindful.org/stressing-out-stop/.
This experience is not going to come naturally, therefore every day you will need to put in effort to practise it for at least one minute. Remember, one minute is always better than none!

Do share your experiences!