All About Teaching Values
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Hahaha I know what all of you are thinking.
At the same time, I also teach my girl to be to take care of those who have taken care of her when she is young, and to be generous with them. She has already promised to buy me a house and a pink color car when she grows up
Telling her that my money is not her money, is simply teaching her that she does not have the liberty to spend my money anyway she wants. It is not telling her to be calculative. My girl understands this very well.
Actually my kids have tons of toys and books at home, so they know that mommy indulges on them. It is just that they do not have the freedom to ask for anything they want.
Anyway, I have not tried this tactic on my son, who is almost 4 years old. He is still not able to understand such logic yet. My girl is much more matured than my boy at the same age.
I thought most parents nowadays do not plan to depend on kids in the future. We all have CPF right ? -
ChiefKiasu:
Hmmm I'm surprised you survived!!! :shock: ... She must have been magnanimous or did you have to offer her big rock for her to give you another lifeline?tamarind:
Me: My money is my money. My money is not your money.
I used this line on my wife once and I'm happy to report that I was fortunate to survive to tell the tale and to not make the same mistake twice.
If we use that on our children, I wonder if they would say the same to us when we are old and dependent on them...
I thought for guys by signing on the marriage certificate equates to handing over the pay check and atm card to personal bank a/c???!!!
Hahaha the above was supposed to be a joke :lol: ... Anyway I managed to keep my own pay check and personal a/c intact and contribute to a common a/c for family expenses instead
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tamarind:
I glad to hear that your girl has learnt to be generous... My son promised me a Maserati to race against his Porsche when he grows up :lol:Hahaha I know what all of you are thinking.
At the same time, I also teach my girl to be to take care of those who have taken care of her when she is young, and to be generous with them. She has already promised to buy me a house and a pink color car when she grows up
Telling her that my money is not her money, is simply teaching her that she does not have the liberty to spend my money anyway she wants. It is not telling her to be calculative. My girl understands this very well.
Actually my kids have tons of toys and books at home, so they know that mommy indulges on them. It is just that they do not have the freedom to ask for anything they want.
Anyway, I have not tried this tactic on my son, who is almost 4 years old. He is still not able to understand such logic yet. My girl is much more matured than my boy at the same age.
I thought most parents nowadays do not plan to depend on kids in the future. We all have CPF right ?
That is why \"new age\" parents need to be flexible, adaptive and resourceful... Becos the same tactics that worked well on one may not work well for another. :oops:
And yes... Us parents also have to be self-sufficient in our old age... Gone are the days when having kids is a form of retirement planning... That is why being parents at this age and time can be pretty stressful cos have to plan for our kids + for ourselves
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Zack,
You reminded me to start teaching my kids the various car models :lol:
In case other people think that I am calculative towards my parents, I am actually giving them a big allowance every month, bring them on cruises/overseas trips every year, and I buy them gifts of substantial value on their birthdays. I hope to set a good example to my kids Although I don't want to depend on them for monthly allowance, some gifts from them will be nice :lol: -
On the topic of money management, my K2 boy has a 'Neopet' Account. My husband gives him an ad-hoc 'allowance' of 3000NP to boost my boy's account, as he is not good in any of the games yet, earning his 'neopoints' (aka NP) by the tens....ie 20-30NP. My boy likes to 'shop' at the 'market' there. He told me that his 'maximum' price is 1000NP...anything more costly than that, he will think twice before buying. Now that his 'account' has quite a substantial amount of NPs thanks to the allowance, (meaning, he can well afford items that cost >10,000NP), his 'maximum' price remain as 1000NP. I told him to relax and spend on some items that he really like, as the points can be accumulated again, but he told me that he enjoy looking at the amount of accumulated points.
Then I told my husband, what's the point of excessive wealth accumulation if you don't know how to enjoy the fruits of your labour? Its pretty tricky to strike the correct balance between being frugal and being paranoid. My boy has been so careful of his 'wealth' that he ensures that he logs out of his account so that 'mummy will not go in and spend his NP'. :? -
Hahaha certainly enjoying this thread discussion... Especially finding out what other parents are doing to teach just one value on money management
jedamum:
Yeap this is the other thing that we must teach our kids not to do... That is going to the extreme of being paranoid and overly particular about spending $$. I find that it's important to learn how to earn the $$ as well as spend $$ ... wisely. After all, what's the pt of earning tons and tons of $$$ when we will never be able to bring it along wherever we go after our hearts stop beating :roll:
Then I told my husband, what's the point of excessive wealth accumulation if you don't know how to enjoy the fruits of your labour? Its pretty tricky to strike the correct balance between being frugal and being paranoid. My boy has been so careful of his 'wealth' that he ensures that he logs out of his account so that 'mummy will not go in and spend his NP'. :? -
\"The child who eats together stays together.\"
So I ensure the whole family eats dinner together EVERYDAY. -
BlueBells:
I think that is a great idea but takes great discipline. My wife and I normally takes 1 meal a day at home and reach home between 7-10pm. Difficult to achieve such an activity\"The child who eats together stays together.\"
So I ensure the whole family eats dinner together EVERYDAY.
So does eating and watching TV together count
:).
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Haha ... unfortunately, it dosn't count for me, or my hubby. The family has no habits of turning on the TV at night. Wierd, I know, but I think our family is one of those that can live without it.
We used dinner time as a family quality time. We share happenings in the office, and the kids share what happens in school. -
Hi
To instill good values should comes from parents. We must walk the talk and set good egs. Eating together & exchanging talks of the morning events, brings family togetherness. It was practice when I was young & now I instill the belief with my family.
Caring for the old, simply by keeping the bonds alive between 3 generations. It can be like a weekly visit, holidays together or just simply a simple phone call to cheer up the grandparents.
Some school arrange for aged home visits. Whenever financial & time permit, yearly, I will drop by the orphanage with my kids to send goodies to the them. It is an eye opener for my kids as I explain the situations the kids are in.
Vacation can be an eye opener too. We visited Cebu Philipines & the living condition is a far cry from what Singapore is today. Explaining a country culture, history & living condition has opened up my kids thoughts of how lucky they are and to count their blessing everyday.
BlueBells wrote [quote]The family has no habits of turning on the TV at night. Wierd, I know, but I think our family is one of those that can live without it. [/quote]You are not the only family that does not on the tv at night. Count me in too. After dinner, there are homeworks, revisions & books to read.
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