Club SAHM

[buds]

janet_lee88:

buds:

janet_lee88, Happy Anniversary! (Forgot to wish you yesterday).. :oops:


How did everything go?

Kissed and made up for every little thing oredi yah? :evil:

Nothing special...he had back to back conference calls till late last night.
But hey, thanks for the wishes...but reading your post on organizing everything and then having girls' out really made me feel less than adequate. You...a mother of 4...can handle so many tasks :salute:

No celebration at all? Not even a quiet lunch or dinner together since the kids are in school? You also can park them at your mom's if need be. You don't hafta feel less than adequate. No matter what we do, we must try to make ourselves happy even if everyone else tries to get to us. Try not let things get to us.. affect us.. too easily. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php Find fulfillment in little things first in our routine and move on to bigger ones once you get a kick out of those little rewards that you give yourself.

It's like work in fact. You wanna knock off early, gao tim everything early. Want bonus, do extra and carry some balls... i mean teh boss a bit.

I like having time for my stuff so i suppose i work faster and also look into work-efficiency.. look back on how i can do things better instead of the same but faster, if you understand what i mean. It's like work-smart. :evil: Not just work hard. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php

Believe me when i share with you this. Even buds_hubs takes me for granted sometimes. He doesn't realize it i guess so i have to tell him once or more :rant: if the need arises. He usually says that i make it look so easy that no one will believe it's a lot of work.. a lot of effort.. to gao tim everything. He has time to beef up at the gym.. go for slow hair cut/ treatments.. jog.. participate in marathon events.. play music.. you name it. I'm a very understanding wife but i feel that when they forget that we sometimes have to squeeze time to even trim our nails nicely or comb our hair properly (if we even do it in the first place ) or even take our time with showers (cos my kids can either come to ask if know the formula to this homework question or mommy can sign this :siao: or chubs calling mommy i want milk and dragon_boi yelling at the top of his lungs just watching me go into the bathroom from his baby cot :faint:)..... i feel the men reminders :nunchuk: mebbe the need for a poke :pokeeye: just to remind them of the things we do to make this home pretty perfect, the kids all cleaned up beautiful and handsome, to get food hot from the oven or stove, the bed ready for :evil:...

Like Miley says it in her chorus.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M11SvDtPBhA

I put my hands up.. and they're playin' my song.. and know that i'm gonna be ok.

So yesterday afternoon i made myself happy slowly diggin into my comfort food..
at my favourite cosy hang out.

http://i45.tinypic.com/15ogtpf.jpg\">

yeeaah.. :drool:

Let's play up the pudding and mousse shall we..

http://i45.tinypic.com/2vi4i1i.jpg\">

...bread and butter pudding drenched in vanilla sauce (oohhh i loooove vanilla sauce)

http://i47.tinypic.com/zw0wzr.jpg\">

...and chocolate mousse.

I feel great today already. Well, chocolate does that to you too. :love:

Plus it's the end of CA1. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php

Yesterday's bitch and binge session can be considered the umbrella before the rain.. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php

You know? Before the Parent Teacher Conference? :nailbite:

[vinegar]

bud,

who take care of ur kids when u go out wf friends? I don’t hv any caregiver.MIL or mother cannot take care…DH couldn’t take leave to celebrate any birthday/V-day/anniversary.He also NOT keen to do so.

[vinegar]

When i was working,i felt happier coz colleagues/friends celebrated my birthday.DH always put his family as priority…

[janet88]

I always remind hubby, 'work smart'...he works very hard...it helps if boss has high EQ also, unfortunately he is not blessed with one


As a SAHM, priority is to make sure house looks presentable, children are clean, healthy and do their work...as wife, look presentable, smell nice (got perfume) and pref look young (possible with the help of collagen, eye gel to control those deep lines and lipstick.

Yes, when taken for granted, it can be upsetting as a wife. So, I tell him WHEN I am unhappy. Like this afternoon...
I told him, if I have doc appt, he says he needs to attend meeting...but when he has eye doc appt, he wants company (manja). He can complain about colleagues or work but when I complain about kids or something, he switches off. He can have bad mood and vent at home but I cannot have the blues :rant:

[vinegar]

janet_lee88:

I always remind hubby, 'work smart'...he works very hard...it helps if boss has high EQ also, unfortunately he is not blessed with one


As a SAHM, priority is to make sure house looks presentable, children are clean, healthy and do their work...as wife, look presentable, smell nice (got perfume) and pref look young (possible with the help of collagen, eye gel to control those deep lines and lipstick.

Yes, when taken for granted, it can be upsetting as a wife. So, I tell him WHEN I am unhappy. Like this afternoon...
I told him, if I have doc appt, he says he needs to attend meeting...but when he has eye doc appt, he wants company (manja). He can complain about colleagues or work but when I complain about kids or something, he switches off. He can have bad mood and vent at home but I cannot have the blues :rant:

true....DH also always expects i support him...coz he is \"working\"..very big shark.
today,i was a bit tired..esp running ard...sending + fetching kids...under hot sun...rushed back prepare dinner...he came bk,i happily showed him son's good CA results,he said i shouldn't show him the papers when he is having dinner....Sharing good news wf him also muz find auspicious timing .Unfortunately,there always no suitable time,coz he always either watch tv or surf nets or doing office work.Explained to him n he perceived i complain.
fed up..i went out for stroll......

he makes himself soooo difficult to talk to.Whenever i've something happy or sad to share wf,he's no longer the person i think of. Coz i cannot sms or talk to him when he's working; cannot talk wf him when he's at home...what's the point huh??

[buds]

Hi vinegar, i bring my children with me most of the time when i go out with my friends especially when they bring their kids as well. All my kids play well with other kids and even if the other children are shy or the reserved type, they won't be for long as my children are outgoing... can make frenz easily. Yesterday, my Daddie did our Thursday run (for DD1's weekly violin lesson) with 3 of my elder children. I brought my wittle baby with me. He had a few bites of what i brought him and soon fell asleep in the midst of his wafer biscuit... (psst... he didn't take his usual afternoon nap yesterday and i let him :evil: because he would be sleepy when we are halfway thru the hi-tea)... When bringing kids (especially babies who don't like to sit still for prolonged periods of time) must plan nicely. This one comes with practice and subject to each individual child's pattern. My babies are breastfed so no need for bottles and they can eat anything non-spicy that we (adults) eat too... so it's easy... be it for short trips, longer ones or if we do decide to bring them overseas for holidays.


My last all out (with all four of them) outing was a chillax movie - Ah Boyz to Men Part 2. Funny siao that wan. Really enjoyz. :please: I like going out so when i want to, i just make it happen. Bringing kids or not doesn't deter me much. Haha..

The times when i didn't bring my children was when i only had my two girls. I would go out for movies, shopping or hi-tea or just normal makans at coffee shops with my kakis when they are in school. I would have already cooked and cleaned the house. Clothes for the following day for all of them all ready as well. Normally ironing all prepared in advance for one week's use so not really a major issue there. Back then too when i don't have dates with my gfs.. i run round the estate or go to the gym or just enjoy a swim. When i'm lazy to go out i catch up on movies at home or just surf net during the few hours or just take naps (which is quite rare) if i need one. As my girls entered school later than most kids, i also frequent the library for activity books for more ideas on lessons/crafts for my girls.

My girls didn't take afternoon naps and when they were later enrolled into a kindy, we took PM session for them. After dinner, hubs and i occasionally go for late nite movies at the mall near to where we reside followed by supper and usually return around 2 or 3am. ILs were then under one roof with us (can watch over) but we never once had to rush home cos they slept like logs. At times we only left when they have slept peacefully instead of after dinner. This way we trouble no one before our dates.

I was thriving in my career before i sacked my boss. I loved working. I simply simply love what i do and would not think twice if i was given a choice to do it all over again in the near future. I find fulfillment regardless when i was working or when i was sahm. I suppose i am easily contented and find that i am happy with simple pleasures. Low maintenance type bah. :oops:

Priority? Buds_hubs... he arh mommy's boy hokay... no surprise if i share with you that he placed his mommy as his #1 hor. His priority? You can go figure...

Men serve 2 yrs NS. I served NS 10 long yrs! Bo pian cos i cudn resign. :rant: But you can read abt that Nonsense Saga in the other very popular thread. :preen: That time of my life was the worst memories ever but what doesn't kill me makes me stronger.

Despite the million differences and whatever preferred priorities, birthdays or anniversaries or mother's day/father's day and all those days..... we still celebrated together. When i was working double celebration, one with our families and one with colleagues.

For me, i was happier when i had my own place. No...... make that HAPPIEST. :please:

PS. Forgot to mention that my hubs also didn't use to help and neither did i have help from either side parents as they were working. Only DD1 enjoyed almost two years with my parents but after that i took over child raising entirely on my own till now with four.

[vinegar]

once i told him i want go bk to work,then he asked,"so who take care the kids?"then,i told him he also has his share of responsibility as father,why am i always hv to settle ur problem while u dont help to settle mine?


Last time,i ever felt my DH is a "burden"…coz he only knew how to eat,complain,but nvr help…after yrs of "drilling",he is beta now…at least less complain,more helpful.

[janet88]

Recent incident when he blasted at me…I took opportunity to inform him that son did quite well for his common test…so I had done my part by planning time for him to revise.


Yes, working outside is no joke…office politics can kill. But do show some concern…I can be listening ear…but it is 2 way traffic.

[buds]

Yes ladies, we are no punching bags... can anytime suka suka blast. :snuggles:

[vinegar]

show more concern in his work? doesn’t work wf my DH…coz he always says he doesn’t wanna talk abt it,coz he doesn’t like to talk abt work,after office hour.I respect him.