Marriage & Parenthood Package

[Funz]

janet_lee88:

Honestly, work life balance is quite bullsh!@. Sorry to say this.

Men are breadwinners...if they take a backseat, their careers will suffer.

It is not bullsh!t. It is about deciding what is your priority.

Work life balance starts with yourself. Though the company and the govt does play a part, ultimately, to achieve that, it has to come from yourself. What are you willing to give up to have that balance?

[janet88]

Funz:

janet_lee88:

Honestly, work life balance is quite bullsh!@. Sorry to say this.

Men are breadwinners...if they take a backseat, their careers will suffer.

It is not bullsh!t. It is about deciding what is your priority.

Work life balance starts with yourself. Though the company and the govt does play a part, ultimately, to achieve that, it has to come from yourself. What are you willing to give up to have that balance?

Much as hubby wants to spend time coaching kids, it is not possible...leaving office at 7pm is quite impossible. Even if he does, he has to continue working at home till 10/11 pm.

[Funz]

janet_lee88:

Funz:

[quote=\"janet_lee88\"]Honestly, work life balance is quite bullsh!@. Sorry to say this.

Men are breadwinners...if they take a backseat, their careers will suffer.

It is not bullsh!t. It is about deciding what is your priority.

Work life balance starts with yourself. Though the company and the govt does play a part, ultimately, to achieve that, it has to come from yourself. What are you willing to give up to have that balance?

Much as hubby wants to spend time coaching kids, it is not possible...leaving office at 7pm is quite impossible. Even if he does, he has to continue working at home till 10/11 pm.[/quote]You know your situation best.

Is it truly really impossible to make it a point to leave at 6 or 7pm 1 or 2 days a week? If one does not make that a commitment, it is easy to let other immediate matters take over, whether or not those matters are urgent and requiring immediate attention. If one is constantly operating on an urgent and important mode, something is very wrong somewhere.

There is no end to work. If there is an end, it will be scary as it means you will be out of a job. So at some point, one has to decide what takes precedence, that pile of work or something else.

[janet88]

Yes Funz,

Something is wrong somewhere. When hubby had eye op and was on 3 weeks hospitalization leave, he was still called even though he cannot see. Sorry off topic...but the point is that, work life balance looks nice on paper but not in reality. I always ask hubby if it is necessary to work till so late...it's scary when he is on MC and questioned if that MC from EYE CENTRE is fake :rant: Gosh, it's follow up with eye doctor.

[pirate]

Yes janet_lee88, there is a problem. The problem is your DH's boss. That's where the problem is.

[3Boys]

Funz:

janet_lee88:

[quote=\"Funz\"]
It is not bullsh!t. It is about deciding what is your priority.

Work life balance starts with yourself. Though the company and the govt does play a part, ultimately, to achieve that, it has to come from yourself. What are you willing to give up to have that balance?

Much as hubby wants to spend time coaching kids, it is not possible...leaving office at 7pm is quite impossible. Even if he does, he has to continue working at home till 10/11 pm.

You know your situation best.

Is it truly really impossible to make it a point to leave at 6 or 7pm 1 or 2 days a week? If one does not make that a commitment, it is easy to let other immediate matters take over, whether or not those matters are urgent and requiring immediate attention. If one is constantly operating on an urgent and important mode, something is very wrong somewhere.

There is no end to work. If there is an end, it will be scary as it means you will be out of a job. So at some point, one has to decide what takes precedence, that pile of work or something else.[/quote]Ummm...janet, I don't think your husband would be different from many working men. If someone is working 12 hour days every day for years on end, it comes down to choice.

Often I am out of the office at 5.30, with my kids from 6.30 to 9.30, then work on to midnight if I have to. Once a week I have dinner out with the DW, kids can manage themselves. It's a matter of prioritisation and time management. I occasionally lapse into that mode of the working man that stays late in the office for days on end without seeing the family. It gets into a comfortable routine and suddenly my workload expands to fill the time I have now created for it. On the other hand, if I say I leave sharp at 5.30, suddenly I am forced to prioritize my work better and be more focused.

If you are facing work life issues, rather than blame the environment, how about you have a conversation with your husband instead? If he is giving you excuses maybe you need to put your foot down.

My DW and I have busy careers, and work life balance is eminently achievable. In fact, it is essential, non-negotiable.

[3Boys]

janet_lee88:

Yes Funz,

Something is wrong somewhere. When hubby had eye op and was on 3 weeks hospitalization leave, he was still called even though he cannot see. Sorry off topic...but the point is that, work life balance looks nice on paper but not in reality. I always ask hubby if it is necessary to work till so late...it's scary when he is on MC and questioned if that MC from EYE CENTRE is fake :rant: Gosh, it's follow up with eye doctor.

Time to find a new boss.

[Funz]

janet_lee88:

Yes Funz,

Something is wrong somewhere. When hubby had eye op and was on 3 weeks hospitalization leave, he was still called even though he cannot see. Sorry off topic...but the point is that, work life balance looks nice on paper but not in reality. I always ask hubby if it is necessary to work till so late...it's scary when he is on MC and questioned if that MC from EYE CENTRE is fake :rant: Gosh, it's follow up with eye doctor.

Being called to clarify some matters or being called back to work? If being called to clarify matters, ok right? It is prolonged MC and if I recall properly it was for retina detachment which is not a surgery that your DH had ample time to prepare for. So likewise, the company did not have ample time to cover your DH's absence. But if it is to ask him back to work, well they can ask but your DH can say not possible since he cannot see. There will always me small minded employers out there. If the immediate supervisor is that unreasonable, time to talk to HR/or the sup's boss or start hunting.

So ultimately, it still comes back to the person himself/herself. If you think you have no choice, well, then you will have no choice.

[Funz]

3Boys:

Ummm...janet, I don't think your husband would be different from many working men. If someone is working 12 hour days every day for years on end, it comes down to choice.

Often I am out of the office at 5.30, with my kids from 6.30 to 9.30, then work on to midnight if I have to. Once a week I have dinner out with the DW, kids can manage themselves. It's a matter of prioritisation and time management. I occasionally lapse into that mode of the working man that stays late in the office for days on end without seeing the family. It gets into a comfortable routine and suddenly my workload expands to fill the time I have now created for it. On the other hand, if I say I leave sharp at 5.30, suddenly I am forced to prioritize my work better and be more focused.

If you are facing work life issues, rather than blame the environment, how about you have a conversation with your husband instead? If he is giving you excuses maybe you need to put your foot down.

My DW and I have busy careers, and work life balance is eminently achievable. In fact, it is essential, non-negotiable.

The problem is a lot of people think that work life balance starts with the company or even the govt. They refuse to see that it should start with themselves.

[3Boys]

Funz:

3Boys:

Ummm...janet, I don't think your husband would be different from many working men. If someone is working 12 hour days every day for years on end, it comes down to choice.

Often I am out of the office at 5.30, with my kids from 6.30 to 9.30, then work on to midnight if I have to. Once a week I have dinner out with the DW, kids can manage themselves. It's a matter of prioritisation and time management. I occasionally lapse into that mode of the working man that stays late in the office for days on end without seeing the family. It gets into a comfortable routine and suddenly my workload expands to fill the time I have now created for it. On the other hand, if I say I leave sharp at 5.30, suddenly I am forced to prioritize my work better and be more focused.

If you are facing work life issues, rather than blame the environment, how about you have a conversation with your husband instead? If he is giving you excuses maybe you need to put your foot down.

My DW and I have busy careers, and work life balance is eminently achievable. In fact, it is essential, non-negotiable.

The problem is a lot of people think that work life balance starts with the company or even the govt. They refuse to see that it should start with themselves.

It's always easier to blame someone else than perhaps take a good hard look at oneself. No offense intended, but I truly believe if one plays the victim, then one will be the victim.