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    All About Autism

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Special Needs & Learning Difficulties
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    • S Offline
      schweppes
      last edited by

      helplessmum3:



      My son physcologist app is on my birthday .
      So this yr birthday , God send me a present, a autistic son.

      Early intervention as u say not cure.
      Still they remain defective in their life.
      Like crack glass or mirror. Can't be mend .

      My son is a mutant there onwards, Fantastic 4 maybe. All hav special intelligence but yet consider disability lo... High IQ yet consider disability individual . Fast learner yet disability .

      Temple gradin is a scientist yet disability ..

      Is sickness . Is mental sickness that always feel there is a door exist..
      Helplessmum3



      STOP thinking rubbish!!

      STOP talking rubbish!!

      STOP acting rubbish!!


      Autism is NOT a sickness nor a mental illness!!

      Your son is NOT a mutant and this is NOT a punishment from God.

      Autism CAN BE managed.

      You make the opportunities happen for your child.

      From what you share here about your son's progress and efforts, he is a bright and sensitive boy. I rejoice in his little achievements. Be proud of those!!

      I believe in God and sometimes I wonder what He has in store for my child. I have stormed Heaven with my tears and a mother's desperation. But a mother's love knows no end. And I will do whatever it takes within my means to help my child.

      Whatever God's plans are for my family, I believe things happen for a reason. A positive reason.

      If you want to help your son, then you must STOP your negative thoughts!!

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • N Offline
        nugget
        last edited by

        helplessmum3:

        Nugget,
        My son physcologist app is on my birthday .
        So this yr birthday , God send me a present, a autistic son.

        Early intervention as u say not cure.
        Still they remain defective in their life.
        Like crack glass or mirror. Can't be mend .

        My son is a mutant there onwards, Fantastic 4 maybe. All hav special intelligence but yet consider disability lo... High IQ yet consider disability individual . Fast learner yet disability .

        Temple gradin is a scientist yet disability ..

        Is sickness . Is mental sickness that always feel there is a door exist..
        I understand you are in pain and it also sounded like you are angry over this situation.

        I don't know how to comfort you as I also feel as helpless as you are.

        After a while,I started to read up as much as I can on ASD, re-adjust my finances, reset my priorities and lower my expectations for my boy.

        Yes its true like crack glass or mirror. Can't be mend .But I chose to make the best situation out of it. I will polished it bright and clear and will put some decorations on it so it bring out the best of its usefulness. We can still look into a crack mirror and see our own reflection right?

        It all boils down to who can accept this mirror and who can't.

        My expectation of my boy now is as long as he can live independently when I die one day, I will be happy.

        That is all i ask of him. Nothing more.

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • S Offline
          schweppes
          last edited by

          nugget:

          I understand you are in pain and it also sounded like you are angry over this situation.

          I don't know how to comfort you as I also feel as helpless as you are.

          After a while,I started to read up as much as I can on ASD, re-adjust my finances, reset my priorities and lower my expectations for my boy.

          Yes its true like crack glass or mirror. Can't be mend .But I chose to make the best situation out of it. I will polished it bright and clear and will put some decorations on it so it bring out the best of its usefulness. We can still look into a crack mirror and see our own reflection right?

          It all boils down to who can accept this mirror and who can't.

          My expectation of my boy now is as long as he can live independently when I die one day, I will be happy.

          That is all i ask of him. Nothing more.
          :goodpost:

          you have penned it so eloquently, nugget. i love the analogy of the cracked glass and mirror

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • M Offline
            mashy
            last edited by

            Helplessmum


            The worst that your son can have is a mom who rejects him like he is some lousy goods.

            I know u are in denial and you need to snap out of it. U were already practicing absent parenting before u realized that something wasn’t right with him. And now u are dismissing him as faulty.

            If u participate more in his life, share more smiles with him and cherish him for whatever he is and whatever he may become, he will be better. Maybe not the best in the world but the best kid u ever had.

            There are many who experience more anguish than this. At least yours is high function with high iq. Many with autism are non verbal, low iq and will need help for the rest of their lives. Many do not have splinter skills and can never read.

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • L Offline
              lavendery
              last edited by

              Agree. They’re right. Same as you, I also feel very sore and angry why it happen to my girl. She is my only child. She’s only 3yrs+.


              As I was complaining buckets to my colleague, I realized that his son was actually non verbal and presently still in Rainbow since age three till now, he is ten year old this year. At that spur of moment I felt that I’m better off than my colleague.

              No doubt if I compared my girl to normal kids, she maybe the odd one out. However at least she is still verbal with speech delay. She also has almost similar sensory issues like your son. With early intervention, our kids will improve slowly.

              Hence i’ve slowly learn to count my blessing.

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • H Offline
                helplessmum3
                last edited by

                Sun2010, thanks for yr understanding


                Schweepes , sOrry I can’t help it, I try to try

                Nuggets, u real good. But I still know that is a crack glass.

                Mashy, I’m a bad mUm, at times feel like end myself n get my son for adoption by someone who k handle him better then me. Was absent mum cuz my son has high IQ n learn things real fast. His first word at 4months old "hello"
                Knows A-Z big n small , 1-100 numbers, all shapes upto octagon, all colors upto grey,gold&silver b4 2yrs old. Really dun ring a bell to me that he is disability person.esp on mental.

                Lavendry,
                I dare not count blessing as I duno when will be another strikes comi g .

                Verbal or non verbal still ASD, young or older still ASD. It’s last forever .

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • M Offline
                  mashy
                  last edited by

                  helplessmum3:
                  Sun2010, thanks for yr understanding


                  Schweepes , sOrry I can't help it, I try to try

                  Nuggets, u real good. But I still know that is a crack glass.

                  Mashy, I'm a bad mUm, at times feel like end myself n get my son for adoption by someone who k handle him better then me. Was absent mum cuz my son has high IQ n learn things real fast. His first word at 4months old \"hello\"
                  Knows A-Z big n small , 1-100 numbers, all shapes upto octagon, all colors upto grey,gold&silver b4 2yrs old. Really dun ring a bell to me that he is disability person.esp on mental.

                  Lavendry,
                  I dare not count blessing as I duno when will be another strikes comi g .

                  Verbal or non verbal still ASD, young or older still ASD. It's last forever .
                  Fine, give him up for adoption. I'm sure many will rush to have him. He is a rare gem and u can't even see it! It's amazing how such a gifted child can have an 'ixxxxxx' mom like u! He is such a gifted boy and all u see is his weaknesses. U have more issues than him and I think u need to work on it yourself. I think he isn't the prob. U are the prob. Now u even blame your own absent parenting on his giftedness? My goodness! It irks me to see a mother like u. I thought u were better than that. All u can think of is yourself!

                  Wish I can be less blunt than this and that I will like all the other forumers tell u not to give up etc etc, but u seriously have a poor attitude.

                  Despite our repeated requests for u to read more about autism and find out more, u do not seem to have done so. U just wallow in self pity and have not taken positive steps to helping your son. It's simply all about u, isn't it? It really isn't about him. It's about him embarrassing u by not being the perfect child? U don't need to end your life. Just give him up for adoption. Many will love to have a genius kid. So what if he doesn't like to talk much. Big deal!

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • H Offline
                    helplessmum3
                    last edited by

                    Mashy,

                    Ya man I really deserve all these from u. U are kind tat y u bother .

                    I just don’t want to bluff or run away . It is the truth I need to face .

                    I read up so many. So many diff saying about ASD. Reading really ain’t my forte.

                    Hope this movie "temple grandin" simplify all autism book.

                    Finally got to rent it.

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • S Offline
                      specialboymum
                      last edited by

                      hi helplessmum,


                      I’m sure you have read in many places that autistic people are ‘different but not less’. But as a parent, we do play important role in their growing up phases to nurture them to be ‘not less’. He still have a long way to go, try picking yourself up and focus on bringing him up just like what you plan for him before. The label ASD is actually just a piece of information that helps you to adjust the way to teach him to learn… that’s all.
                      A positive mindset and determination is what matters to overcome any difficulties in learning. Not sure if you read in some reports that Mr Lee Kuan Yew has dsylexia i.e he has difficulties in reading, but he still managed to complete law school with double stars first class honors. Also note that nobody knows about dyslexia during his time…

                      Another thing which I think would help is don’t compare with other kids and try not to set a standard or goal for him to achieve (eg wanting him to know how to ask questions by certain age), just guide him along and cheers for him with every single steps he achieve, whether or not he is still behind his peers.

                      I know it is not easy lah…even for myself, I’m still trying. I took the not so good approach- I found myself distance from my friends and no longer attending their children parties. 😛

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • S Offline
                        specialboymum
                        last edited by

                        Hi Mummies,


                        Just want to seek your advice. Anyone has good suggestion on how to teach our kid to gargle and rinse their mouth? I have been trying for a long time but still not successful. He doesn’t know how to hold water in his month, he will just swallow

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0

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