All About Full-Time Maids

[Andaiz]

winth:

Hi there!


Is it normal for maids not to speak up?

I mean I dunno how to tell her to talk, but she's literally doing things quietly. I'm fine with that, but not when things go wrong and I'm not informed about it... And I have to wait till I see it then she tells me that I'm too busy (that's why she didn't talk to me) or that she planned to talk to me but she forgot about it soon after...

This maid is good, but I really hate that habit of hers.

winth, I'd put it to cultural differences. The helpers think that by telling us, it's like they are admitting that it is their mistake...then when we find out and fume and fuss, they just sit there as if \"ha! That's exactly why I didn't want to tell you in the first place\".

For me, I've always said upfront (and repeat countless times) that if they did something wrong, to be upfront and tell me rather than wait till I need the stuff (or am busy or rushing off to work) that these things are told to me last minute and I'm expected to conjour things up like a magician.

So I use positive strokes lah.... catch her telling me ahead and praising her for it. Works for this one but for HRH she just clammed up no matter what it takes to pry her mouth open !

[blurqueen]

peapot:

If I could, I wouldn't want to bother my mum but I don't have any other choice. Wished there was some kind of subsidised trustworthy part time help for FTWM when maids go crazy.


Can I ask a really stupid question? Would you trust your maid if she has worked for you for years? After this incident, I realised a maid can just change without batting an eyelid. And we are talking about years being with you. This also means they will not take you as part of their family. But as the years moves on, we will tend to trust the maid more isn't it.

I'm sorry to hear that your maid is such a b*t*h with you! Don't let her bully you! Send off her the moment you get a chance, preferably before she even gets her S-pass. Since your hub can cover mornings for a week, you can use the time to arrange for temp CC and send her back immediately.

I had my 1st maid for 6 years. I treated her like family, she ate with us and slept with the kids. She also chatted with us even among relatives, not just within my home. Then she started to change as she got too comfortable.

For all the years, we maintained the bank account for her and withdraws/transfer funds for her. However one fine day, she said she wanted to open her own Indo account. I told her timing is bad since we're sick and tough to let her take off, told her to hang on for a week or 2. Behind my back, she told hub whom she knew was super lax that she wanted to go to the bank in the morning (w/o my knowledge and hub thought i knew). When i woke up at 9am, i nearly left for the Dr as I was having high fever until I saw a post-it on my kitchen door to state that she has gone to the bank!

Thankfully I saw the note, otherwise, I'm unlikely to make it back fr Dr and there'll be no one to pick up my 2 DSs! At 3pm, she sashayed through my front door. I was so furious, the whole block could hear me screaming at her! And not surprising, she felt she didn't do anything wrong not informing me verbally; the post-it did the job.

I agree we should treat our maids nicely .... but never let them think we're \"family\".

[kiasimom]

blurqueen:

When i woke up at 9am, i nearly left for the Dr as I was having high fever until I saw a post-it on my kitchen door to state that she has gone to the bank!

Wow, that was very gutsy of her!!
I will :x :x :x at it and will send her packing the moment she came home.

That is TOTAL irresponsibility and NO respect from her :x :x

[Andaiz]

blurqueen:

When i woke up at 9am, i nearly left for the Dr as I was having high fever until I saw a post-it on my kitchen door to state that she has gone to the bank!

That's major disrespect! THis is basic courtesy right? And the gall for her to go round you, check with DH and play one against the other.

I'd have sent her home for insubordination man! :x

[2ppaamm]

I used to think that it is really troublesome to send a maid home. At least that’s what the agency tells me. They would always suggest a transfer instead. That way, it will save me costs. I found out recently that this is not necessary true.


By transferring the maid, you basically sign off on the paper that you agree to let her transfer and that’s it. Problem is, if the maid knows that she can always do anything to you and still get to stay here, what is the incentive to behave and act professionally or even reasonably?

Thanks to budget airlines, I sent my last maid home on a $45 ticket. This is the process:
1. Log on to a budget airline and book her ticket.
2. Go to MOM website and cancel her work permit.
3. Print out that cancellation confirmation.
4. Attach (3) to her passport and drive her to the airport.
5. Make sure you get her work permit back and surrender that to MOM.
6. See her off. Make sure she checks in properly.
7. If your maid is the difficult kind, many agencies would send your maid off for $20 or so.

That’s all. The agency told me it will cost $400 because of a thousand reasons. I just smiled and did the above.

Agencies have the interest to transfer your maids because they can collect another 2 months’ or so salary from the maids. The maids are glad because they can always get away and continue to stay in Singapore.

So, if your maids are giving you trouble, why bother to send her to another home? We have too many of these transfer maids who are already tried and tested failures already.

[Blobbi]

2ppaamm:

So, if your maids are giving you trouble, why bother to send her to another home? We have too many of these transfer maids who are already tried and tested failures already.

Yah totally agree. AT first, I hired this maid agency to do the escorting and sending off for a total fee of $200, plus airfare (will show receipt). Later, I used the agency through which I hired maids to do it as part of the service. This is for the really pai-kia maids who might escape and cause trouble. I must have done this at least three times cos I was so angry (theft, shouting etc). :x :x . Each time, the other maid (we used to have two at a go till I got fed up) will be shivering and crying in a corner. That's like 杀鸡吓猴., and she's usually the softer one too, so it works ... for awhile.

I now have a great maid :love:. Not family or what lah, but professional and efficient, so we each know where we stand. Anyway, I've dug her out of so many crisis, she's quite grateful. Lucky for me, it's her personality to feel grateful - I had one maid for whom I paid an expensive private operation 3 mths after she arrived become a banshee in a year because she started mixing with a Filipina who managed to marry an angmoh. So she started to have aspirations. :roll:

When this good one finally leaves for whatever reason, I'll know where to go to to find help for myself.

[Andaiz]

Yeah, Blobbi...the info on these threads are good...

Blobbi:

... I had one maid for whom I paid an expensive private operation 3 mths after she arrived become a banshee in a year because she started mixing with a Filipina who managed to marry an angmoh. So she started to have aspirations. :roll:

Mine has said that she hs such an aspiration although she does say she's not the marrying kind :!: She's a single mother who's not been married...so go figure!

I'm now torn between NOT sitting on a time bomb, or keeping her! :love: although this is not an immediate need for a action lah!

[Blobbi]

Actually, for one maid whom I thought was pleasant and honest, but totally hopeless at looking after kids or cooking, I was her \"testimonial\" and spoke to the prospective employee. I didn't sugar coat it - she really was very good at cleaning. Anyway, she got a job where all she she to do was look after the two dogs and clean the house. About a year later, I stopped receiving \"happy birthday\", good wishes types sms' from her. Then I heard from my current maid that she was sent back! Why? Seems she cho-cho'd the dogs till they bit her, and the owners were so unhappy with that (did I mention she's not good at taking care of live creatures? :lol:).


Some of these maids are really quite nice, but they're just not very suitable for their chosen professions because the motivations for their careers were based on need and availability.

[Blobbi]

Andaiz:

Mine has said that she hs such an aspiration although she does say she's not the marrying kind :!: She's a single mother who's not been married...so go figure!

Wah Andiaz, if this were a gossip column, we'll have tonnes of stories to tell about THAT department!! :!:

[2ppaamm]

Blobbi:

I paid an expensive private operation 3 mths after she arrived...\\

I transferred a difficult maid once. She started off very good but then started to not want to do anything but act like the boss. She bossed around the other maid and screamed at her to do things...where do i stand?

I then transferred her. After she worked for the new employer for less than 3 months, she had to go for an operation. It cost the new employer about $17K. After the ops, she behaved really badly, my agent told me. I should have sent her off. I feel so bad having to 'do' this to the new employer, I should have sent her home...

I hope that new employer is not you....