How to handle cheeky classmate?

[jedamum]

your girl must be very pretty....

[autumnbronze]

sleepy:

My dd has been getting lots of unwanted attention since starting primary school last year. Love letters, love declarations, marriage proposals & stuff like that. Kids being kids, so far I just find it amusing. My dd never responded to any love declarations, just laughed it off or ignored them.


Recently, one of her admirers stole a kiss on her wrist after declaring 'I love you'. That boy has been following her around since last year. This is the first incident. So far none attempted to kiss or hug her. I won't be so amused if any classmate attempted to steal a kiss on her cheeks or hug her. My dd was caught by surprise & told that boy not to do that again.

So how should I teach her to deal with situation like this? I don't think it warrants reporting to teacher since it's not a case of bullying. However, how do we deter cheekiness? And how to fend off such unwanted attention?

Sleepy,

Your DD's situation brought back memories of my own experience when I was in P3. I had one one hell of a persistent admirer. Ditto scenario only no kisses. I remember telling him off so many times but to no avail. I was teased mercilessly by my classmates. I remember feeling so desperately fed-up that I told my dad and he came down to school and spoke to my form teacher.

The boy, I remember, got a warning from both the P and my teacher. He never bothered me again.

Sorry I may not have been of much help here. But this is how it was resolved in my case

[schweppes]

jedamum:

your girl must be very pretty....

ya, was just going to say that too!
dear sleepy, your dd must be a real beauty!! :lol:

[sleepy]

Not that pretty lah, just jovial :lol:

[titank]

sleepy:

My dd has been getting lots of unwanted attention since starting primary school last year. Love letters, love declarations, marriage proposals & stuff like that. Kids being kids, so far I just find it amusing. My dd never responded to any love declarations, just laughed it off or ignored them.


Recently, one of her admirers stole a kiss on her wrist after declaring 'I love you'. That boy has been following her around since last year. This is the first incident. So far none attempted to kiss or hug her. I won't be so amused if any classmate attempted to steal a kiss on her cheeks or hug her. My dd was caught by surprise & told that boy not to do that again.

So how should I teach her to deal with situation like this? I don't think it warrants reporting to teacher since it's not a case of bullying. However, how do we deter cheekiness? And how to fend off such unwanted attention?

Report to Discipline Master can a not?

[schellen]

She should speak to her form teacher or if she isn't close to her form teacher or if form teacher is a guy, she can approach another teacher she trusts. Based on your description, I think the boy meant no harm as he may not be socially apt or \"educated\" on how to, er, \"court\" a girl? However, to prevent anything unpleasant from happening, it's best to be proactive.

[KS_me]

sleepy:

My dd has been getting lots of unwanted attention since starting primary school last year. Love letters, love declarations, marriage proposals & stuff like that. Kids being kids, so far I just find it amusing. My dd never responded to any love declarations, just laughed it off or ignored them.


Recently, one of her admirers stole a kiss on her wrist after declaring 'I love you'. That boy has been following her around since last year. This is the first incident. So far none attempted to kiss or hug her. I won't be so amused if any classmate attempted to steal a kiss on her cheeks or hug her. My dd was caught by surprise & told that boy not to do that again.

So how should I teach her to deal with situation like this? I don't think it warrants reporting to teacher since it's not a case of bullying. However, how do we deter cheekiness? And how to fend off such unwanted attention?

:lol: :lol:
My boy in P2 came home one day share with me about his classmate, a boy, who told him about a girl in the same class who looks very pretty and interesting to him.... and he officially told everyone in the group that he wants to marry her...

:lol: :lol: some boys are way too cheeky to say all this at P2

[westmom]

schweppes:

jedamum:

your girl must be very pretty....

ya, was just going to say that too!
dear sleepy, your dd must be a real beauty!! :lol:

Better work on going to an all girls secondary school!..haha...

[MMM]

KS_me:

My boy in P2 came home one day share with me about his classmate, a boy, who told him about a girl in the same class who looks very pretty and interesting to him.... and he officially told everyone in the group that he wants to marry her...


:lol: :lol: some boys are way too cheeky to say all this at P2

Wow.... kids mature early these days??? My P2 don't seem interested in girls yet :xedfingers: Anyway reminded him that looks is not everything. It's the character that is more important.

[buds]

Aaaahh... this topic rings a bell for me as my DD1 has received similar

attention from boys at her school as well. One particular boy though, up
till today. :lol:

A few times we've heard her sharing with us about classmates teasing
her about it... & all she can do is say no lah... no lah... not boy friend just
a friend who is a boy. We teach her to say that in case she does get such
teasings from friends. The cases to me do not warrant a complain to the
principal cos it's harmless... at least at this point. However, stealing
kisses, hugs and any other bodily contact can prove to be the start of
other unwanted scenarios. Like schellen said, it's best to be pro-active
now that the boy is beginning to display his affection/crush using body
contact.

My DD1's case is of a like love-at-first-sight kinda story. She is constantly
being observed by this guy in school. It doesn't help that he is in the same
class. One jolly afternoon, he discreetly wrote a love letter complete with
smilies and hearts asking to see my DD1 at the school bridge/pond where
the koi fishes are. While we anxiously listened to her sharings, our hearts
went dug-doog dug-doog... ya know like why ask to meet in such place in
the school albeit in the presence of a lot of people, but for what and why..
and all the questions lah. The letter wrote :

\"Dear XXX, would you like to meet me at the pond / bridge during recess
later? I would love to meet you. But... if you're not willing or do not wish
to, it's okay. I will not be angry at you. Love, XXX.\" And ended with smilies.

Soooweeet hor..

DD1 said she didn't know how to react. She blushed as she narrated her
afternoon. Seemingly liking the attention showered exclusively to her, she
said she was busy at recess and hungry so she didn't have time to meet
him at the said venue. They kena go down late for recess that fateful date
and my DD1 had to queue up for sometime for food and by the time she
got down to finishing her food, it was almost time's up to go back to class.
She only managed to chat up with some friends over at the canteen while
she was having her food. We asked if she did peek over to see if he was
there... :evil: Well, she said she was on the way up to her class anyway &
had to pass by the pond :roll: ... yeah right... :lol: ... and she said the boy
was STILL there! :shock: So, she quipped at him, \"Hey XXX, you sent me
a letter to meet you here... what's up, sorry i was busy just now...\"

The boy's face lit up at her presence and he started out... \"Because......\"
Then... the school bell rang to indicate the end of recess. :rotflmao:

On the way up to the class, he chatted her up a little bit. We asked DD1
what kind of topics did he talk about. She said, \" Ummm... well... he asked
about what i liked to do... like what my hobbies are... he said he liked
playing computer games and i replied i liked playing my violin...\" XXX
just answered, \"Wow, that's interesting and prretty creative..\" DD1 said
she just smiled at his reply.

I know... i know... i was going like.... aaaawww myself. :love:

In class thereafter, the boy nevertheless looking a little dejected... he still
manage to curve up a smile on his lips for her. And she felt good about it,
cause she shared that the boy wasn't angry with her and that she
somehow felt that he was gonna be cool about this. That they'd be cool.

Hubs asked, \"How does this boy look? I wanna see..\"

DD1, \"He's ummm... not bad looking la. Quite fair and spikey hair.\"
She added that he does well in his work and is not those kinda boisterous
boys who yells in class and acts tough. He's a gentleman and looks out for
her. She sometimes finds him \"around\" and suddenly helping her with stuff
like for example when she broke her tooth one day and a girl classmate
brought her to the toilet, he asked if she needed tissues. When she hurried
to pack her stuff to go for the next class, he went over to the table and
without any words just help her pack and went running for the next class
together. I silently chuckled inside telling myself what a sweet boy he was...

He does not attempt to be funny with her so far and she has not complained
of anyone trying to do so and we let it be, but we share with her if a boy
should try to, she MUST tell us and at that instant if there was a teacher
present, let's say if done in class... she should speak up about it. If done
without the knowledge of other people around, she MUST tell the boy right
in his face that she DOES NOT LIKE it. She will let it go if he promise not to
do that again (try to be cheeky and using bodily contact) and still be his
friend, or else she WILL go to the teacher, tell her parents and WILL NOT
want to be his friend anymore. And if the boy wants to maintain cordial
relationship with her, he would be willing not to repeat the cheeky actions
any more.

Faith reasons, she is also taught that boys are not allowed to touch girls.
No pre-marital sex and stuff like that. So, that helped too.

As for that boy, i had a personal experience with him. I was called in to do
Parent Voluteer (PV) for the class. Ahah! :idea: And i concluded that i would
not mind it one bit that he has that crush for my DD1. I find he's like the
bodyguard, the knight that watches her back for when she is in trouble &
he doesn't make his feelings come out so strongly that it may affect studies
or platonic relationship. It's kinda nice to have him look out for her.

He was like :!: when he saw me join the class and chatted up with the
teacher! His expression was priceless, boy! :rotflmao:

But he was a very sweet boy. Very well behaved/mannered and he does
well for his studies. Concentrates during class and a pretty funny bloke at
that, so he's kinda popular. He cracks jokes to brighten up the class.

During the field trip that i PV-ed for that day @ Pasir Ris Kids Kampong, i
caught him giving his big fishies to my DD1 who was pretty frustrated at
not getting any by the first 15mins. I heard him telling DD1, \"Here, you
can have some of my fish. I have a lot anyway.\" Kekekee.. :lol: Sweet
huh?

At that, a couple of guys from the class came over and said, \"Wah, so good!
Only she get arh? Then me leh?\" :evil:

At that instant, i was like ..... Haaaa! What was he gonna do now? :evil:

Being the chivalrous person that he really is, he replied. \"Sure! Here you
go!\" And he readily gave his \"smaller fishies\" into the other fella's bucket. :rotflmao:

I'm thinking in my mind that what he wanted to give them was more like
:heresmyfish: :rotflmao:

Hubs asked her to throw away the love letter, but i pleaded to let her keep
it. He asked me why.. I said, \"Well, let her keep it as a part of her memories
of growing up. And the other part is, it is HER letter anyways...\" :roll:

Well, just in case he DOES chuck it into the bin when DD1 least realizes
it... i had it scanned into my PC as back up. :lol: I for one, am sentimental
about special moments in my life while growing up. It's part of the
experiences that a growing girl will have fun keeping and with DD1
innocently sharing her life experiences with me makes me feel included
in her life...... I like it that way. :hugs:

And i hope to always be a part of her no matter how grown up she may be.. :love: