Children of average ability

[ChiefKiasu]

tamarind:

...But I would not say that he is very bright. A very bright child needs only 1 repetition. Some very bright children do not even need to be taught to read. My boy is only average...

I would tweak that definition to:
\"A very bright child needs no repetition if he/she has interest in a particular activity, which manages to capture the full attention of the child. Some very bright children don't even need to be taught to perform activities that they have interest in.\"

It is more likely your boy lack the interest to read rather than the ability to learn quickly to read. We should not judge the giftedness of a child simply by the fact that he cannot read before kindergarten or primary school. Our challenge as parents is to continuously experiment and think of ways of making it easy for our children to learn - and it is challenging because every child has its own unique preferred learning style that lead to that \"a-ha!\" moment.

[sashimi]

My daughter (6, almost 7), still has the occasional problem with d and b, but it was worse before. She still confuses 40 and 14 sometimes. I don’t pay all this much attention, because I know she’s a smart child. She can read on her own most of the time, and I’m quite proud of the fact that even when she encounters a word she’s never seen before, she attempts to read it - she sort of utters her best guess. This is important.


I have never taught her phonics in the academic sense; we just read and read to her all through the years. I prefer this indirect approach. (Granted, she probably did some phonics in kindergarten).

I have a slightly more annoying problem with her piano playing. She seems to be able to play the score, but I can tell she has semi-memorized the notes on the page matching with the keys on the board. If I point to a particular quaver and ask her what note (A, B, C…) is this, she tends to fail.

At first, I was quite stressed by this. It was clear to me the girl had memorized key-note positions (and imperfectly at that) without actually knowing what notes she is actually playing.

I.e. when she sees a note, her mind automatically gets her finger to hit a key on the piano. It’s reflex. At her stage though, it is not perfect, so sometimes her reflex is incorrect.

My point: I think with language ability and learning, it is similar. Language is like music - at first you struggle to learn what key is what note, but later on when you’re skilled in it, it becomes reflex, no need to think.

After many months, it occured to me that scolding my girl for not knowing what she’s playing was not helping. It also didn’t help my mission to keep her piano learning as stress-free as possible.

I decided to abandon the very adult methodology of "knowing exactly what you are doing" in favour of the more natural "doing what you feel is right". (Like taking your best shot pronouncing a new word).

So, I no longer scold her for not knowing what notes she’s playing; instead, when she plays wrong notes, I simply… tell her what she’s supposed to play.

Eg. last night she had a phrase E-D-E. But she played it repeatedly as E-F-E. And when I asked her how come you are playing E-F-E, her response was "but that’s what it is". She was clearly playing by reflex.

I told her, the notes are going down and up, so it should be E-D-E. And I told her to practise this. Half a minute later, she got the passage perfect. Goal achieved, no stress.

My point again: don’t stress yourself over reflexive mistakes - the child is still learning.

Have confidence; so long as your child is not obviously displaying any serious learning disorders, keep your methods stress free. Teach language like a piece of music, not a scientific formula. Very soon, it will become reflex.

(Esp. with the extremely messy language that is English).

[tamarind]

ChiefKiasu:

It is more likely your boy lack the interest to read rather than the ability to learn quickly to read. We should not judge the giftedness of a child simply by the fact that he cannot read before kindergarten or primary school. Our challenge as parents is to continuously experiment and think of ways of making it easy for our children to learn - and it is challenging because every child has its own unique preferred learning style that lead to that \"a-ha!\" moment.

He is actually reading quite well because like you said, I probably found his unique preferred learning style.

The problem is that he writes almost all the letters and numbers in mirror images. My mother just told me, that today she let him trace out \"2\" about twenty times. After he finished, he still writes 2 in mirror image


Sashimi,
Thank you so much for sharing ! I like what you said about \"doing what you feel is right\".

If I could turn back the clock to the time when I was his age, I would not have worried at all. I did not have to know A,B,C until I entered primary one. But the education system today is putting a lot of stress on kids with average learning ability like my boy.

I planned to send him to West Grove, a neighbourhood school within 1 km from my place. They require students to write english compositions in P1. I know a boy who could not follow up at P1 in West Grove. He was asked to go back to kindergarten. He and his mommy were traumatized. It is difficult not to be stressed

[sashimi]

I completely sympathize. Despite what I wrote yesterday, I admit at times I still feel a bit stressed when my girl makes \"unnecessary\" mistakes.


But.... to hear things like P1 kids being \"asked to go back to kindergarten\" is really outrageous. To me, this kind of education system is really inflexible. Then again, that's not news.

I am not an expert in child education/pedagogy, but I know for a fact that no two kids are alike. Just because a child is now 7 x 365 days old does not = he MUST be able to perform skill A which happens to be in the syllabus. All kids have different levels of skills and maturation.

What to do....

Anyway, tamarind, if it helps, there are a lot of articles on the net about mirror writing. Try these:

http://school.familyeducation.com/learning-disabilities/writing/42767.html

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080915100414AAitqyj

You'll find that basically, it's very normal in a 4 year old.

[tamarind]

sashimi,

Thank you for the helpful articles I think that my son will love to put stickers on his body, as described in the second article.

Quote:
In the clinic, what I would do is start w/ body awareness (this is a precursor for directionality). I might give a child a sticker and have him put it on his head, his hand, his knee, his foot etc. Then we would progress to other types of directions such as \"above, below, on, in, under, on top.\" I would make it a game. For example, you can get a chair and put a toy \"on\" it, \"under\" it, to the \"right\" of it. Get him to say where it is and take turns placing the toy.

[sleepy]

tamarind:

sleepy:

Tamarind

my elder girl cut her fringe & a lock of her sister hair!
no specific reasons, just itchy fingers :roll:

:shock: Any repair work needed ? I mean if the fringe became crooked, you need to cut again right ?

Yes, brought her salon to straighten her fringe, but extremely short lor, even the stylist asked why is there a hole?

Aiya, I discovered my elder girl cut her sister hair again!
Only noticed it today because I saw a portion of spiky hair on my younger girl's head. Apparantly cut some weeks ago & with new hair growth only shows up today.
I don't understand why she allows her elder sister to cut her hair without protesting.

[en107rn.01056yahoo.01056com.01056sg]

sleepy wrote [quote]Aiya, I discovered my elder girl cut her sister hair again! [/quote]
My ds cuts his sister hair too. I warn him one more time he dares to touch his sister hair, I will bald him up like his grandfather. He knows I will do as I threatened & that really stops him.

[cluelessmom]

tamarind:

I know a boy who could not follow up at P1 in West Grove. He was asked to go back to kindergarten. He and his mommy were traumatized. It is difficult not to be stressed

I can't believe tat! It is outrageous! Was it said in jest or was he really sent back to kindy? Gosh.... wat is happenin to our education system????

[tamarind]

sleepy:

Aiya, I discovered my elder girl cut her sister hair again!
Only noticed it today because I saw a portion of spiky hair on my younger girl's head. Apparantly cut some weeks ago & with new hair growth only shows up today.
I don't understand why she allows her elder sister to cut her hair without protesting.

:shock: May be she did not know the damage done because she was not looking at the mirror when her elder sister did it.

cluelessmom:

tamarind:

I know a boy who could not follow up at P1 in West Grove. He was asked to go back to kindergarten. He and his mommy were traumatized. It is difficult not to be stressed

I can't believe tat! It is outrageous! Was it said in jest or was he really sent back to kindy? Gosh.... wat is happenin to our education system????

That boy was neglected in class for a few months, because he could not follow up with the rest of the class. The teacher advised his mommy to put him back in kindergarten. His mommy had no choice but to pull him out of school. The boy did not want to go to another primary school because of the experience. His mother spoke to the principal of Jurong Calvary Kindergarten who kindly took her son in. The boy actually attended a PCF kindergarten for 2 years before entering P1, his teachers never told his mommy that he had any problems academically. That's why she was so shocked.

[en107rn.01056yahoo.01056com.01056sg]

Tamarind, doesn’t West Grove has LSP program? Or was the child really beyond help that he has to go back to kindergarten? So far, I’ve heard of a child that join P1 a year later. The mother (who was my primary school classmate) told me that her child is born pre-mature & due to doctor

recommendation that the child start P1 a year later.