All About Full-Time Maids
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I remembered my friend’s maid ask for transfer when she’s not allow to use hp at home. My friend was very firm and said "then you can go" and she was transferred out a week later! She’s the type of employer who doesn’t like to be hold ransom by maids! I can’t afford to be like her because I got no support at home! Sometimes I also need to close one eye to the maid’s doing.
My maid is an Indonesia and she doesn’t take pork. Although she can handle pork, she refuse to cook pork because she cannot eat. So, I also close one eye to it. Only my child got no pork to eat. I tolerate for 1 month plus until I can’t take it anymore. I told her nicely yesterday that she needs to cook eventhough she don’t eat because we are not muslim family and perhaps she may be better off working for a Malay family!! I already let her pray 5 times a day, what more she want??!! She wants to convert my family!!!?? -
I wonder if maids are here to work or to enjoy life. They suffer a fair bit during the training in Indonesia. Once selected to come, they go overboard. My maid dresses up even when we go IMM.
If they are not given handphones, they find opportunities to go downstairs to use public phones. If they have handphones, they yak or sms non-stop. If I allow them to use hp, they yak until wee hours of the morn and don’t get up at 6am.
As for food, I usually put aside some food for them and then we can finish up the rest. Whether they throw food away or not, we won’t know. Bcos of Indonesians not eating pork, every meal is mainly chicken.
Having a maid means you have to close BOTH eyes, esp those who are SAHM. As employers, we are literally at their mercy. Strict with them=either spit into our food or murder us. Lenient=climbing on top of our heads. -
peapot:
My maid uses the housephone to call her family (via phonecard). We've told her to courtesy inform us before she want to use even though no one is at home. She did that last weekend. And happily deleted ALL the numbers in caller id.
Then she starts using my housephone to cut down on her phone expenses. All her friends start calling my house! I was so mad!! So I tell myself, its enough!! No more hp for her.
Now I'm left wondering why in the world she did that.....any number she dare not let us know? A bit worried that she'll call local numbers (international sure to show up) and chat the night away. -
lovekidsverymuch:
Its true that kid needs to be taught but then u know some times they might just do they wont realize the impact so some one which in this case is maid should take immediate step and thats why i said call up the employer to let her know of the situation
OK. This is an issue which we will have to agree to disagree because it's a difference in viewpoint.
I am not sure how old the elder boy is, but if we consistently teach the boy he should not treat his sibling in this manner, we are treating the root of the problem. We can't condone such behaviour, and expect the maid to stop the elder boy's behaviour. Teaching the elder boy goes a long way than telling the maid she should watch out for the boy's behaviour.
The key point here is to be consistent in teaching the elder boy (what happened to the elder boy if he bite his sibling again? The next time he bites his sibling again, does he get the same treatment?).
Of course I agree that the maid should also have pulled the elder boy aside and called the parents. Our recommendation shouldn't just stop there. -
I used to buy Phoenix card ($8-$10) for my maids…they can yak for 1/2 hour regardless of peak or off-peak hours. I allow her to use my housephone so that I know where she is. Her family is NOT allowed to know my home number or handphone.
I brought my maids out each time I go out…then give her 1 hour to buy her stuff and have some air to breathe. The reason is bcos they have no off-days. They were appreciative in the beginning, after that they didn’t appear at the time I told them. -
Maids should just be looking after the kids, but discipline is not in their hands. Instead, they should feedback to the employers what is happening.
Is the older boy jealous of his sibling ? Is he doing such a thing to get attention from parents ? If this is the case, the boy should be given a chance to air his frustrations why he is doing that. -
My rules for my maid are - NO PHONE & NO OFF-DAY. I’m very friendly with her, but she understands that she is here to work. I give her generous angpows, let her eat and drink whatever she wants, rest when she is tired, allow her to go out to buy things when necessary, help send her mail, buy her books to read, gifts for her kids etc. I also gave her AWS and promised her a raise and bonus if she performs well.
That’s why, after I read Kishore Mabhubani’s article for Think Tank in the ST last week, I was laughing because I couldn’t believe how the issue about the Romanian hit-and-run diplomat could be a lesson for Singaporeans to treat their domestic workers better. I thought to myself, why does everything have to be some sort of propaganda? And does he manage his domestic help?
Don’t get me wrong. I’ve admired Kishore Mabhubani since the time he guest spoke at NUS where I was a young idealistic undergraduate. He is an excellent diplomat and politician. But when it comes to my domestic help - should I do more, as Mr Mabhubani suggests? Well, my question to him might be, does he conduct a personal friendship with all his staff? Do they go out together for meals? Go shopping? Sleep-over? Does he go out of his way to accomodate their whims and wants? OF COURSE NOT. And that’s my answer to him too.
In other words, if my govt does more for me, surely I will do more for my maid. Until more flexibility and protection is given to employers and until the levy is reduced or even removed - we should not expect to see much change. Why should we treat our maids like queens when the country treats us like slaves? Try it - tell anyone you’re a SAHM and they’ll give you a wry look like you wasted their resources on your education. Want a second maid? Read the rules first! Do you qualify? Changing maid for the how-many-th time? Time for re-education! NGOs for maids - hey what about for SAHMs? I mean, isn’t anyone feeling ill from the double standards? -
janet_lee88:
Totally agreed. We can't live with them but can't live without them eitherI wonder if maids are here to work or to enjoy life. They suffer a fair bit during the training in Indonesia. Once selected to come, they go overboard. My maid dresses up even when we go IMM.
If they are not given handphones, they find opportunities to go downstairs to use public phones. If they have handphones, they yak or sms non-stop. If I allow them to use hp, they yak until wee hours of the morn and don't get up at 6am.
As for food, I usually put aside some food for them and then we can finish up the rest. Whether they throw food away or not, we won't know. Bcos of Indonesians not eating pork, every meal is mainly chicken.
Having a maid means you have to close BOTH eyes, esp those who are SAHM. As employers, we are literally at their mercy. Strict with them=either spit into our food or murder us. Lenient=climbing on top of our heads.
I'm waiting for the day when the kids are older and shift to part-time maid.
As an SAHM, I have to face my maid 24hrs a day. I sometimes will find excuses to go out, just for a cup of tea or something just to get away from her. She's on the other hand, very happy to be left alone at home so she can turn on her music and be the queen of our house. -
janet_lee88:
As for food, I usually put aside some food for them and then we can finish up the rest. Whether they throw food away or not, we won't know. Bcos of Indonesians not eating pork, every meal is mainly chicken.
Don't think it's a good idea to eat chicken so much. Heard the hormones in chicken will make kids reach puberty earlier (esp girls). My kids eat lunch in their kindergarten and every other day there's chicken on the menu. I think it's b/c the school can't provide pork and fish due to religion and safety reasons respectively. Therefore we don't eat chicken that much at home nowadays, maybe once a week. I try to diversify into other types of meat like beef, pork, squid, even frogs. -
peapot:
It's better not to let them use our phone, at least not openly. Better just let them use their hp as they have to pay for it themselves so probably will exercise some restraint.
Then she starts using my housephone to cut down on her phone expenses. All her friends start calling my house! I was so mad!! So I tell myself, its enough!! No more hp for her.
We never specifically told any of my maids regarding our phone policies. My previous maid who's more sociable, would talk on my phone for hours whenever i'm out (I knew that as many times when my friends or mom tried to call my home no. the line was always busy. Also, there's always a list of unknown dialed nos when I returned home :x). My current maid is better in the sense that she rarely use my phone when i'm out, and it's usually just her sister number of the dialed list.
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