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    All About Life Without Maids

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Domestic Help
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    • M Offline
      MintyMin
      last edited by

      I wan to go maidless soon too…


      After reading frm the 1st post to the very recent one, all the more am determine not to have anymore maid after my current (getting bolder as if she is employer, sigh).

      I have 3 kids, 5, 3 & 1yr, am a FTWM with a DH tat refuse to help out wif housewrk or kids, if he does… i guess it will be consider SPECIAL… sigh…

      My 2 olders kids r in Full Day childcare juz next blk, and currently my maid is at hm wif my younger together wif mum visiting occasionally to spot check maid…

      Mum does the marketing everyday, coz she prefer freshness of food for my kids… N i do marketing on saturdays/sundays…

      wonder hw possible is it for me to b maidless, if i haf a DH who totally waits to b served… guess he is my biggest challenge.

      As for my kids, they are quite gd at keeping toys after play esp my DD1, though he grumbles if sisters doesnt want to keep, but still help me to do so…

      N all the gadgets you ppl get r super ex… wonder when i can afford since am in financial woes…

      Like is sad… but i hope to make the best out of it n have wonderful life wif my kids w/o maid who gossips, give black face n haf time to read newspapers n no time to give me a fully clean hm…

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • N Offline
        nonKiasu
        last edited by

        celtricia:
        I wan to go maidless soon too..


        After reading frm the 1st post to the very recent one, all the more am determine not to have anymore maid after my current (getting bolder as if she is employer, sigh).

        I have 3 kids, 5, 3 & 1yr, am a FTWM with a DH tat refuse to help out wif housewrk or kids, if he does.. i guess it will be consider SPECIAL.. sigh..

        My 2 olders kids r in Full Day childcare juz next blk, and currently my maid is at hm wif my younger together wif mum visiting occasionally to spot check maid..

        Mum does the marketing everyday, coz she prefer freshness of food for my kids.. N i do marketing on saturdays/sundays..

        wonder hw possible is it for me to b maidless, if i haf a DH who totally waits to b served.. guess he is my biggest challenge.

        As for my kids, they are quite gd at keeping toys after play esp my DD1, though he grumbles if sisters doesnt want to keep, but still help me to do so..

        N all the gadgets you ppl get r super ex.. wonder when i can afford since am in financial woes..

        Like is sad.. but i hope to make the best out of it n have wonderful life wif my kids w/o maid who gossips, give black face n haf time to read newspapers n no time to give me a fully clean hm...
        Your DH is exactly like mine! So frust. My DH don't even wash his own cup! Employing maid is more of serving him than helping me bec maid's problem is my problem! So my long term strategy is to train my DSs to do housework. The good thing abt childcare is that they really train our kids to do everything themselves and we just need to add on. My 5-yr old triplets can wash their own dishes. In the evening, DSs help me to mop the floor. I squeeze the mop and they have fun walking around with the mop. Yes, I make it a fun time and limit it to only 20 min. If too long, it will not be fun anymore. With an irobot to vacuum in the morning while DSs is in kindergarten, my floor is deem clean whole day. As for laundry, I need to collect only my DH ones which can be anywhere in the house! Furst! I do the laundry after DSs go to bed at 8pm and collect them from the bamboo only next evening when we need to bathe. So don't time and effort to fold the clothes, towel, etc. I don't iron any clothes bec only my DH's office clothes need to be iron and I am not his maid. So, celtricia, it may be possible if we close both eyes on our DHs mess. I sometimes ask my DSs to nag at their daddy or better still, clear the mess of their daddy e.g wash the cup.
        The initial weeks w/o maid is tough but will get use to it soon. In fact, before my maid left, just thinking abt life w/o maid is scary since I have maid for 5 good years. But in the end, what I enjoy is privacy.
        All the best in trying out without a maid 🙂

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • janet88J Offline
          janet88
          last edited by

          My hubby is the one who manages the finances. Having a maid = levy + salary + food + 6 months doc checkup.


          If the maid does what she is employed to do, I believe any employer would continue to have a maid, but if she shows black face, has an attitude problem, tells lies and gives problems, why should we have to pay so much to have a maid ?

          I can’t afford to have a maid, bcos I can’t afford to feed her. With my last Filipino maid, she ate so much rice that I have to buy a cheaper brand. Now that we don’t have a maid, my PUB bill has dropped as well as my grocery expenditure. My hubby also helps out with the household chores, the kids and we don’t quarrel over a maid (the maid gives problems and I get stressed etc etc etc).

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • N Offline
            nonKiasu
            last edited by

            janet_lee88:
            My hubby is the one who manages the finances. Having a maid = levy + salary + food + 6 months doc checkup.


            If the maid does what she is employed to do, I believe any employer would continue to have a maid, but if she shows black face, has an attitude problem, tells lies and gives problems, why should we have to pay so much to have a maid ?

            I can't afford to have a maid, bcos I can't afford to feed her. With my last Filipino maid, she ate so much rice that I have to buy a cheaper brand. Now that we don't have a maid, my PUB bill has dropped as well as my grocery expenditure. My hubby also helps out with the household chores, the kids and we don't quarrel over a maid (the maid gives problems and I get stressed etc etc etc).
            Ha, ha. Same here. We bought 25kg rice, giant brand! Now, we can eat organic brown rice (2kg) on alternate days.
            Yes, I also got stress up from maid, driving me crazy. Yes, they are ex partly bec I may need to pay for my own mental treatment if things continue in this way.

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • M Offline
              MintyMin
              last edited by

              nonKiasu:
              Your DH is exactly like mine! So frust. My DH don't even wash his own cup! Employing maid is more of serving him than helping me bec maid's problem is my problem! So my long term strategy is to train my DSs to do housework. The good thing abt childcare is that they really train our kids to do everything themselves and we just need to add on. My 5-yr old triplets can wash their own dishes. In the evening, DSs help me to mop the floor. I squeeze the mop and they have fun walking around with the mop. Yes, I make it a fun time and limit it to only 20 min. If too long, it will not be fun anymore. With an irobot to vacuum in the morning while DSs is in kindergarten, my floor is deem clean whole day. As for laundry, I need to collect only my DH ones which can be anywhere in the house! Furst! I do the laundry after DSs go to bed at 8pm and collect them from the bamboo only next evening when we need to bathe. So don't time and effort to fold the clothes, towel, etc. I don't iron any clothes bec only my DH's office clothes need to be iron and I am not his maid. So, celtricia, it may be possible if we close both eyes on our DHs mess. I sometimes ask my DSs to nag at their daddy or better still, clear the mess of their daddy e.g wash the cup.

              The initial weeks w/o maid is tough but will get use to it soon. In fact, before my maid left, just thinking abt life w/o maid is scary since I have maid for 5 good years. But in the end, what I enjoy is privacy.
              All the best in trying out without a maid 🙂
              nonKiasu, ya manz.. my DH clothes is everywhere too... tings he take, he'll juz leave it where he last is.. seriously can't stand it.. My son who is same age as ur DSs loves to use the small vacuum to vacuum the flr whenever he sees dirts, hair, crumbs.

              Once my youngest reached 18mths, i'll have my maid to go, whh is in august. I can't wait. Though my mum n aunts told me to reconsider as it will be huge amount of wrk if am gg to be still wrking n wif no maid, to do all the hsewrk by myself will tired me out.. whh b4 i read all the postings in this thread, i seriously doubt if am capable..

              HEre will b the place where i will find all motivation and encouragement to go maidless n haf a clean n tidy home.. 😄

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              • janet88J Offline
                janet88
                last edited by

                nonkiasu,

                I buy Heavenly 5kg rice...when I had a maid, my 5kg can finish in 2-3 weeks :shock: Then I switched to NTUC. Without a maid, I switched back to my favourite Heavenly brand.

                When I had a maid and she drives me up the wall, I seek consolation from hubby...if he is in a good mood, he will listen. If not, he will show me a black face bcos the maid costs him a lot of money every month.
                Without a maid, we have so much privacy and not worry about money being lost or a stranger walking into the room. Of course, the house is not that clean and the windows are not shiny.

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                • B Offline
                  Breadandmuffins
                  last edited by

                  Hi


                  I have been thinking of letting go of my current maid (and also one and only maid) who was with me for 7 years but have no courage to do so. I am a SAHM with 4 kids ranging from 1.5 to 8 yrs old and a husband who has a very busy and stressful job. I drive the two older ones to schools and enrichment (tennis, piano, chinese, art) do all the marketing, plus supervise their work, read to them, bring them to parks,playground except cleaning and cooking which is done by maid. Of course, she also help slook after the children when I am out. If I am without a maid, I will have to bring the younger ones whereever I go, rush home, cook meals, do laundry etc, which could be difficult at times. Even now, I always felt stressed with the lack of quiet time for myself. Husband and MIL are totally against this idea of no maid. Reason of letting her go is that she is no longer interested in her work and keep on using HP despite repeated reminders for the last 10mths. Also started to become rude and naggy…very frustrating for me. If you are a SAHM with 4 kids and no help, perhaps you can share with me how to cope without going "crazy"

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • janet88J Offline
                    janet88
                    last edited by

                    Breadandmuffins:
                    Hi


                    I have been thinking of letting go of my current maid (and also one and only maid) who was with me for 7 years but have no courage to do so. I am a SAHM with 4 kids ranging from 1.5 to 8 yrs old and a husband who has a very busy and stressful job. I drive the two older ones to schools and enrichment (tennis, piano, chinese, art) do all the marketing, plus supervise their work, read to them, bring them to parks,playground except cleaning and cooking which is done by maid. Of course, she also help slook after the children when I am out. If I am without a maid, I will have to bring the younger ones whereever I go, rush home, cook meals, do laundry etc, which could be difficult at times. Even now, I always felt stressed with the lack of quiet time for myself. Husband and MIL are totally against this idea of no maid. Reason of letting her go is that she is no longer interested in her work and keep on using HP despite repeated reminders for the last 10mths. Also started to become rude and naggy.....very frustrating for me. If you are a SAHM with 4 kids and no help, perhaps you can share with me how to cope without going \"crazy\"
                    It's very tiring to have no maid with 4 kids, esp since you have to bring them around for activities on top of housework and cooking. If this maid is on your nerves and stressing you out, have you thought of getting another one to help you for another 1-2 years until kids are bigger. Or perhaps cut down on some of the kids' activities.

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • N Offline
                      nonKiasu
                      last edited by

                      janet_lee88:
                      Breadandmuffins:

                      Hi


                      I have been thinking of letting go of my current maid (and also one and only maid) who was with me for 7 years but have no courage to do so. I am a SAHM with 4 kids ranging from 1.5 to 8 yrs old and a husband who has a very busy and stressful job. I drive the two older ones to schools and enrichment (tennis, piano, chinese, art) do all the marketing, plus supervise their work, read to them, bring them to parks,playground except cleaning and cooking which is done by maid. Of course, she also help slook after the children when I am out. If I am without a maid, I will have to bring the younger ones whereever I go, rush home, cook meals, do laundry etc, which could be difficult at times. Even now, I always felt stressed with the lack of quiet time for myself. Husband and MIL are totally against this idea of no maid. Reason of letting her go is that she is no longer interested in her work and keep on using HP despite repeated reminders for the last 10mths. Also started to become rude and naggy.....very frustrating for me. If you are a SAHM with 4 kids and no help, perhaps you can share with me how to cope without going \"crazy\"

                      It's very tiring to have no maid with 4 kids, esp since you have to bring them around for activities on top of housework and cooking. If this maid is on your nerves and stressing you out, have you thought of getting another one to help you for another 1-2 years until kids are bigger. Or perhaps cut down on some of the kids' activities.

                      Ya, I thot so too. I am so tiring with 3 boys and can't imagine if I have 4, esp your youngest one is only 1.5 y.o. However, it also depends on how independent your older ones are. Can the 8 y.o. one help to look after the 1.5 y.o. if you are out for 1 hr? Is your 1.5 y.o. very guai and you can tahan that she is with you wherever u go? I am the youngest and I used used to follow whereever my mum went and got nickname handerchief. We were fine bec my mum love to have my company.
                      My 2-cents worth of advise...
                      You should prep yourself and your kids on life w/o maid. Run thru in your mind - how u will do things differently w/o the maid. A few mths before my maid contract ends, I started to try out various chores that kids can do on their own or even help me. Yap, stop my maid helping my DSs on various things. I also start looking for gadgets that can help me. So far, bought only the iRobot (1 mth b4 my maid left). In short, must get ready b4 maid left. Finally, D day to try w/o maid. Then if really too tiring, you can always get a new maid.
                      My take is you never know you can make it if you never try. However, we hv to be flexible to do a U-turn.

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                      • janet88J Offline
                        janet88
                        last edited by

                        When we had a maid, my hubby can do things which irritated me like leaving cups around, or else face computer whole day or watch TV…while I had to suffer the maid’s nonsense.

                        Of course the shiok part is someone to cook and clean up, BUT that is where my expenses increase…bcos hubby wanted to eat more dishes.

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