Club SAHM

[sleepy]

buds:

We've heard once too often how many mothers sacrifice high
paying careers to be there for their children.. So do know that
there are fathers who are also willing to go through the same
path..

Communication between spouses on what they want for their
family is important. Parenting is a shared-responsibility just like
how housework is. :lol: More hands make lighter work! :celebrate:

I was drawing a slightly higher salary than hubby when I left my job 7 years ago. A whopping 51% cut to our household income!
We decided I should be the one to stay home due to social stigma. Employers are generally more receptive of mums taking a few years off than of dads who did the same.
However, IF I was drawing twice of hubby's salary at that time, our decision might be different

[minnie2004]

sleepy:

I was drawing a slightly higher salary than hubby when I left my job 7 years ago. A whopping 51% cut to our household income!

We decided I should be the one to stay home due to social stigma. Employers are generally more receptive of mums taking a few years off than of dads who did the same.
However, IF I was drawing twice of hubby's salary at that time, our decision might be different

Same here when I quit my job . However, I'm not an aggressive person so I let DH develop his career instead. Also, I know if he's the one who stays at home, he'll spend most of his time golfing instead of watching the kids :stupid:

[sleepy]

minnie2004:

Same here when I quit my job . However, I'm not an aggressive person so I let DH develop his career instead. Also, I know if he's the one who stays at home, he'll spend most of his time golfing instead of watching the kids :stupid:

My dh likes to play golf too. Obsession :roll:

[buds]

Hi sleepy, good point on the social stigma thingy.

Yes, i do agree... more so for the daddies, hence i
do find it is definitely also a big sacrifice on their part.

The daddies that i had the pleasure of being acquainted
with were either practising law.. one or two had own firm..
the other was a businessman.. helping out family business,
and the other was in security line. They claimed to have a
more flexible working arrangements which can be done on
the side, on and off (freelance), or evenings.. so i guess it
works out for them fine. As for other occupations, say mebbe
husbands in civil service and such i guess better not jeopardise
career then huh.. better for wife to stay home, find alternative
care giver (family circle) or a domestic helper, in such situations.
Having said that, i do know of mothers who have approved long
leave as long as 2yrs and they get to come back to the same
position when they return to the service. Not heard of daddies
doing it tho.. or mebbe there are but i have not encountered any
personally..

I too was earning slightly more than hubs when i stepped down.
I was blessed cos i had a lotta perks being a loyal and performing
staff... extra bonuses and profit sharing incentives. But due to
extreme circumstances, no one to care for the girls full time and
also a more challenging pregnancy i made that big decision eventually
and not without that fear of uncertainty.. of what the future holds....

I also thought that i shouldn't trouble my folks since the children ARE
mine, hence whatever sacrifices should come from us first.. husband &
wife... instead of troubling the old folks who have done enough child
raising over the last 30yrs. I mean, seriously.. they need a break..
cannot expect them to take care of children then grandchildren...
mebbe great grandchildren too ya know what i mean.. so poor thing
oso lah.. should let them have a life outside of the caregiving position
their whole life. That said, there also are some parents who do not mind
and are more than happy to do that for the rest of their lives..

My folks are enjoying lots of travel & couple time these days.. it's good
for them.. ..i knew i made the right decision. Now with both kiddies in
school, i am rewarded with the much awaited ME time which i simply love!
With them now much older, i also have the flexibility to do free lance and
continue to do what i love best. Teach.

[jedamum]

sleepy:

minnie2004:

Same here when I quit my job . However, I'm not an aggressive person so I let DH develop his career instead. Also, I know if he's the one who stays at home, he'll spend most of his time golfing instead of watching the kids :stupid:

My dh likes to play golf too. Obsession :roll:

my dh likes to play computer games...obsession...:P
dh is clearly the higher paid one (although not high if compare to those around here). he said not worth for me to go back to work cos the peanuts i earn is not worth the stress he undergo if i go back to work.

[buds]

Wah seh.. peanuts leh.. :laugh:

[jedamum]

buds:

Wah seh.. peanuts leh.. :laugh:

:oops: i was referring to the part time pay i was getting the few years prior to my SAHM life....peanuts, but better than no savings now...

[HappyAvon]

I had been serving my 3 mth notice period since March and finally I can see the day coming nearer...In 2 week's time, I will declare myself as a SAHM after working for 15 years!!!! Some of the ppl around me is saying Im crazy to make such decision especially to part away with the big pay pocket plus the yearly bonus and incentives....Well it may sound true but still money cannot buy back the loss time with my dearest darling girl...Since we had no elderly at home, we depended completely on the maid to look after my 5 yrs old sweetie...Throughout these years, I had thots of giving up a promising career but delayed it again and again....Worried about living with no salary....DH is very supportive and told me he would still give me a monthly salary and he is ready to be the sole breadwinner..So we sit down and had a good discussion...Hey! I'm still paid by my new boss .. It isn't so bad isn't it??.....I had already got my daily timetable done up for my new role.... At the same time, I will be busy doing PV work....I guess God knows I will be free and fortunately was selected as PV in a school we wanted... :celebrate:

[auntieM]

An official welcome to you HappyAvon :celebrate:

[janet88]

When you become a SAHM, you will lose your financial independence but you will get to bond with your daughter...that is something which money cannot buy. I'm happy for you to be chosen to be a PV and sincerely hope you manage to register your daughter in the school next year. :celebrate: