Me Time!
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MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1933351\" time=\"1567480826\" user_id=\"43981:
I don't think am cut out to be a parent. I will go crazy if I have to be at home and face the kids all day. I enjoy the adult company and intellectual stimulation of at work and am happy to put in the hours at work.
I think got to see what 'kind' of parent you are too? some can be very nurturing, good in planning like esteema (at least it is what I think)..you will see that you forgo something but you get back/ maybe more than that in terms of how your kids bloomed for eg..how you enjoyed not working etc.. maybe you got to think..ok le..I think I have done/achieve what I would like to achieve..and I am ready to forgo everything else in my career or at least I will be happy even if I won't be out again to work or just work a little bit..else your mind cant really rest even though you are really not working for many years..and as times go by, we will get older, outside world changed etc etc..I too, gave up same when I stopped.. and I feel the stress lor..but of course I do have my time with my kids since they were born which I value alot, learn a lot from them as well..still there is something very unsettling inside..
I think the kids are also happy that I work. DH works long hours too and will not want me to be too free as it is easy to over think things. -
Some are cut out to be stay home parent some are not. There is no 100% right or wrong way neither is one better than the other. It all boils down to individual and each family’s dynamics. Does not mean that you are not a stay home parent means you are not able to teach, guide and provide all the support they need.
Those who can have a choice to be stay home parent or not are the fortunate ones. Many do not have that choice at all. -
Yah to have the choice at all is definitely a blessing. I actually have a very flexible job now - I can be home at five and do the evening/bedtime routines with the kids and then get back to work at night (flexible is not part-time). Looked at it one way, it's perfect. Looked at it another way, I feel like I'm putting in part-time hours in two full-time jobs (work and parenthood) and just barely scraping through for each - this would work for someone more organized or more hardworking (so that me time at night is really work time), but I can't compete with the people who put in the hours in the office and at night, and I'm basically just hustling the kids through dinner/bath/bedtime each night.
Edited to add: but it is a better deal than a lot of FT working parents, I know. I'm trying to have it all, and this might be as good as it gets (at least until the contract ends!).
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We’re thinking of taking a weekend away in October, to eastern China, and somewhere we haven’t been before. Considering Hangzhou or Xiamen. Any tips about cheap flights, decent hotels, things to see? It will be only be 3 nights, so we don’t want to do too much.
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slmkhoo\" post_id=\"1933515\" time=\"1567557100\" user_id=\"28674:
Winter season round the corner?
We're thinking of taking a weekend away in October, to eastern China, and somewhere we haven't been before. Considering Hangzhou or Xiamen. Any tips about cheap flights, decent hotels, things to see? It will be only be 3 nights, so we don't want to do too much. -
I’ve been a SAHM for the past 18 years. fortunately hubby is the type who supports me for whatever decision I make.
son had cleft lip and palate when he was born…so there was a lot of running about and taking care. even after his recent operation, I took care of him in the hospital. if it is not him, then it would be hubby’s eyes, daughter’s academic needs or my parents…bound to be something.
fortunately I never had travel bug…so even cheap commercial airline tickets don’t excite me. I just don’t like to live from the luggage. -
Estéema\" post_id=\"1933523\" time=\"1567558804\" user_id=\"66413:
Still far from winter. VERY pleasant weather and a fantastic time to visit both HGH and XMN.
Winter season round the corner?slmkhoo\" post_id=\"1933515\" time=\"1567557100\" user_id=\"28674:
We're thinking of taking a weekend away in October, to eastern China, and somewhere we haven't been before. Considering Hangzhou or Xiamen. Any tips about cheap flights, decent hotels, things to see? It will be only be 3 nights, so we don't want to do too much.
Unfortunately, ‘very fantastic’ also mean it’s the peak period, especially National Day aka Golden Week which runs from 1 October to 7 October. You WILL want to avoid that week AT ALL COSTS!
There are the usual cheap flights from the budget carriers or you can consider the Chinese carriers like MF for XMN (which I feel offer a better deal compared to the budget carriers).
Between the two cities, I much prefer HGH. “上有天堂，下有苏杭” 绝不是浪得虚名. -
floppy\" post_id=\"1933538\" time=\"1567561772\" user_id=\"97579:
Still far from winter. VERY pleasant weather and a fantastic time to visit both HGH and XMN.
Winter season round the corner?Estéema\" post_id=\"1933523\" time=\"1567558804\" user_id=\"66413:
[quote=slmkhoo post_id=1933515 time=1567557100 user_id=28674]We're thinking of taking a weekend away in October, to eastern China, and somewhere we haven't been before. Considering Hangzhou or Xiamen. Any tips about cheap flights, decent hotels, things to see? It will be only be 3 nights, so we don't want to do too much.
Unfortunately, ‘very fantastic’ also mean it’s the peak period, especially National Day aka Golden Week which runs from 1 October to 7 October. You WILL want to avoid that week AT ALL COSTS!
There are the usual cheap flights from the budget carriers or you can consider the Chinese carriers like MF for XMN (which I feel offer a better deal compared to the budget carriers).
Between the two cities, I much prefer HGH.[/quote]like many places so modern already hor..
floppy, you have any idea of driving say from Hangzhou to Beijing or GZ? It is not a good idea? -
hb\" post_id=\"1933494\" time=\"1567531595\" user_id=\"179788:
I will work till 6 to 7pm so that I no need to carry physical work back home
Yah to have the choice at all is definitely a blessing. I actually have a very flexible job now - I can be home at five and do the evening/bedtime routines with the kids and then get back to work at night (flexible is not part-time). Looked at it one way, it's perfect. Looked at it another way, I feel like I'm putting in part-time hours in two full-time jobs (work and parenthood) and just barely scraping through for each - this would work for someone more organized or more hardworking (so that me time at night is really work time), but I can't compete with the people who put in the hours in the office and at night, and I'm basically just hustling the kids through dinner/bath/bedtime each night.
Edited to add: but it is a better deal than a lot of FT working parents, I know. I'm trying to have it all, and this might be as good as it gets (at least until the contract ends!).
ftwm -in mid or snr position - we have no choice to plan work in our brains/minds even though we are at home with kids or Overseas holidays (urgent enquiry- i m ok la)
quite a few times, i sat beside my pri kids during major exam revision - but my phone keep beeping - boss msg !
our minds are also constantly \" working\" at home for planning, day time in office is run operations
a challenge is no bandwidth to plan personal growth & self recuperation - Busy minds -
MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1933540\" time=\"1567562488\" user_id=\"43981:
like many places so modern already hor..
Still far from winter. VERY pleasant weather and a fantastic time to visit both HGH and XMN.floppy\" post_id=\"1933538\" time=\"1567561772\" user_id=\"97579:
[quote=Estéema post_id=1933523 time=1567558804 user_id=66413]
Winter season round the corner?
Unfortunately, ‘very fantastic’ also mean it’s the peak period, especially National Day aka Golden Week which runs from 1 October to 7 October. You WILL want to avoid that week AT ALL COSTS!
There are the usual cheap flights from the budget carriers or you can consider the Chinese carriers like MF for XMN (which I feel offer a better deal compared to the budget carriers).
Between the two cities, I much prefer HGH.
floppy, you have any idea of driving say from Hangzhou to Beijing or GZ? It is not a good idea?[/quote]Both cities are modern, but they have also taken steps to make sure that they are not so modern, especially in and around the sights.
E.g. 西湖, 雷峰塔 and 灵隐寺 in HGH still retains much of their charm. “水光潋滟晴方好，山色空蒙雨亦奇。欲把西湖比西子，淡妆浓抹总相宜。” is as true today as it was when 苏东坡 penned it hundreds of years ago. Meanwhile, 鼓浪屿 in XMN is pedestrian only, which goes a long way in protecting the world heritage site.
I have done some driving in CN but not that far a distance in CN, mainly within cities. TBH, I won’t want to drive with HGH to PEK - I rather take the train. High speed train (> 200km/h) will take you more than 5 hrs already! To Guangzhou is more than 6 hrs.
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