All About ADHD : Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
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MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1966005\" time=\"1583534919\" user_id=\"43981:
Thanks for sharing. It seems you are quite relaxed about your DD’s situation. Did she improve a lot overtime when she went on to P3 and then upper primary? Or her inattention didn’t translate into not being able to do her work or at least kinda achieve a passing mark?
I have one kid with some of the traits you mentioned..yeah since she goes for formal school setup, teachers/tutors feedback the same thing..mind went very far away need to be brought back to class/lessons. Was recommended by cher to get some tests done at primary level but till now we didn't do anything coz I always gave myself explanations as to why she was not at her peers level at lower primary and later I just treat it as combi of immaturity/due to her very own nature to be more careless/ do Math eg dont use paper to do working etc, use her eye/brain looking at qns etc..talking abt this, my younger one study tingxie/spelling also dont use pencil to write to practise first instead just use eye power to study the words.. To me, I would see how bad it impacts her studies/life..if it is not very serious, to me it is alright, life continues as normal.
My DD at the moment barely get 30% of the questions in her quiz/ worksheet right, despite she has done math enrichment/ drills prior to entering P1. I did this not because I am kiasu but rather her number sense was very weak and very evident by K2. I wanted to build her confidence before she started P1. I would say generally half her mistakes are due to carelessness/ not reading the question (linked to her inattention) and half her mistakes are due to her weakness in the subject, can’t understand or transfer and apply what she has supposedly learnt. Does this sound serious? -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"1966017\" time=\"1583543689\" user_id=\"28674:
Thanks for all the sharing and tips. So it seems ADD therapy can be done at home but requires a lot of research, understanding and patience.
I only had my daughter formally tested when she was 14yo. We were living overseas most of her childhood, and we just \"therapied\" her ourselves. The schools she attended overseas were generally understanding, even if they couldn't do anything specific to help. We had her tested before returning to Singapore, knowing that Singapore schools are not very accommodating unless you have proof. We brought her to an educational psychologist in private practice as we were only in Singapore for a short while and didn't have time to navigate the publicly-funded route. The conclusion was that her ADD-type behaviour was due to ASD rather than ADD. In any case, the way to deal with focus is pretty much the same no matter what.
My daughter's main issues are social and physical skills, and her daydreaming is secondary, though it did cause problems at school and with schoolwork, as you have observed. My daughter was pretty much the same as your description of yours! Testing her would be possible at her age, I think, and it would help if you can get the school to cooperate to provide her with some help (e.g. a seat under the teacher's nose, regular reminders to focus, etc). But the main training has to be done at home, and it will need someone who is there all the time in the early stages, and LOTS of patience.
We did a lot of reading up and trial and error over the years. These are the main things we did starting when she was about 6, when she started school:
- we gave her a study desk with no distractions (facing a blank wall, away from family noise, nothing on the table except her work and minimal stationery).
- we had a homework helper to sit with her during her homework time every day, just to keep her focused and to help her along if she got stuck. We were blessed to have a college student who loved kids and actually came every day. I was too impatient, and had to cook and look after a younger child, so I delegated.
- we devised various bite-sized drills for Maths and other things she was weak in, and I worked at them with her in very small snatches, not during the homework time.
- I read up on ADD therapies (there is a lot online). ADD and other learning issues are a continuum, and there is no reason why they won't help any child, whether or not diagnosable. In general, break up the work into small steps, give frequent short breaks, have a signal (e.g. tap on the book) to draw back a wandering attention, lots of praise for any improvement, never compare with \"other kids\", etc. Start from where the child is (e.g. focus for 3 mins at a time), and not where the child \"should be\", and be prepared that it can be a long haul.
My daughter only needed the dedicated homework helper for 1 semester, and although she still needed watching after that, she didn't need someone by her side every minute. She did manage to cultivate better study habits (not very good, but acceptable), and needed less watching and support as time went on.
Hope this helps.
How about the brain training courses, therapy program offered at various centres? I imagine they do quite different things from what parents do at home as described above.
Does anyone have any experience to share? Thanks in advance. -
patpatrol\" post_id=\"1966145\" time=\"1583654636\" user_id=\"184545:
If it's weakness in understanding, then you will need to figure out why, and then address those issues directly. Go right back to basics and make sure she masters the foundation; worksheets will have to come later.
I would say generally half her mistakes are due to carelessness/ not reading the question (linked to her inattention) and half her mistakes are due to her weakness in the subject, can’t understand or transfer and apply what she has supposedly learnt. Does this sound serious?
If she is not reading the question carefully, that habit has to be trained bit by bit. First, sit beside her. Make her read the question aloud slowly. Ask her to tell you what she needs to do, step by step, without writing anything down yet. Get her to do those steps one by one on paper until she gets the answer. You may have to guide her like this for days, weeks, even months - it will always take more repetitions than you think is needed. After she gets into the habit to breaking things down like that, then you have to monitor that she always does this for every question. If she doesn't, make her repeat the steps with you. Eventually, she will build up the habit. Of course, as she improves her understanding, some steps can be skipped or done simultaneously, but she should be made to do them sequentially initially.
This step by step method should reduce carelessness too. Also teach her to check her answer by a different method (repeating the same steps will usually mean she will repeat the mistake). Again, checking has to become a habit.
I can't say anything about brain training and other therapies, but you can try to help your child develop a longer attention span through doing things she enjoys. Set aside uninterrupted time for her to do whatever it is she likes, and encourage her to stick to it for as long as possible before getting distracted. Try to give her a space when she is not likely to be distracted, and try not to ask her to do something in the middle of the activity. Again, this will help her biuld a habit of staying with 1 thing for longer. -
patpatrol\" post_id=\"1966145\" time=\"1583654636\" user_id=\"184545:
I sometimes feel quite ashamed to say it..my dd never attended any enrichment prior to P1. She starts school not knowing to write/read/count in proper order. However I was quite amazed and felt very lucky that she catches up fast as her P1exams all in 90s and could finish reading quite thick books like in abt 3hrs by half year.. at P1 she pushes herself to catch up with peers and at P2 she has got a real demanding form teacher so that helps. Thereafter, her teacher were mostly 'mild' type, so not doing hw, or do hw during other lessons time quite normal to her. Her marks can swing alot, but her normal low then around 70s..on one hand she told me why teacher teaching quite slowly but results on assessment can be one third of the marks.. Teacher called me, we spoke and I told her I m actually not sure of her problem now..dunno, careless or combi?? when in pri, I could gauge her issue more 'accurately' but now in sec when everything is new, I have no idea yet.
Thanks for sharing. It seems you are quite relaxed about your DD’s situation. Did she improve a lot overtime when she went on to P3 and then upper primary? Or her inattention didn’t translate into not being able to do her work or at least kinda achieve a passing mark?MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1966005\" time=\"1583534919\" user_id=\"43981:
I have one kid with some of the traits you mentioned..yeah since she goes for formal school setup, teachers/tutors feedback the same thing..mind went very far away need to be brought back to class/lessons. Was recommended by cher to get some tests done at primary level but till now we didn't do anything coz I always gave myself explanations as to why she was not at her peers level at lower primary and later I just treat it as combi of immaturity/due to her very own nature to be more careless/ do Math eg dont use paper to do working etc, use her eye/brain looking at qns etc..talking abt this, my younger one study tingxie/spelling also dont use pencil to write to practise first instead just use eye power to study the words.. To me, I would see how bad it impacts her studies/life..if it is not very serious, to me it is alright, life continues as normal.
My DD at the moment barely get 30% of the questions in her quiz/ worksheet right, despite she has done math enrichment/ drills prior to entering P1. I did this not because I am kiasu but rather her number sense was very weak and very evident by K2. I wanted to build her confidence before she started P1. I would say generally half her mistakes are due to carelessness/ not reading the question (linked to her inattention) and half her mistakes are due to her weakness in the subject, can’t understand or transfer and apply what she has supposedly learnt. Does this sound serious?
During pri, I can say mostly careless, not reading instruction..she could fill up the OAS completely out of order but she can redo with correct answers. I try not to press her too hard coz I find that causes her be more ganjiong .. but I do nag her alot as in I need to keep reminding her to do this and that..coz all of us forget easily..if she doesn't do right away, it seems like a burden to me coz I worry she might forget haiz..actually this is no good, over reliant on me and cause kids not to learn to remember due to lack of lessons from bearing the consequences..
For me, actually another reason why I agree with dd (she always tell me that she is perfectly alright!) not to go for testing was because of her ability to catch up at reasonable rate to me..errr we talking abt primary level yeah coz I m not so sure now. During one discussions with the cher who advised me few times for her to get checked..she did mentioned something like whatever problem she may have it is not related to intelligence..my own understanding is a kid can have avg/above avg brain but also can have other underlying problems??
As she matures, she is a generally an ok kid. She told me she scolded her meimei for kept playing and watching tv while I was out for my lessons. She is sure not that 'gong gong' as when she was younger..bring Milo in flask to school will spill Milo type. She is not the steady type under stressful situation..so what I can do is to let her do her own stuffs under her own time mgt, I try not to nag so much..reduced a lot already haha now turning my nag to the younger one..another thing is she likes to do alot of funny things..like eg I just nagged her..she went to squeeze out a big portion of her cleanser from tube put into a container and mixed it with some other stuff to make a new cleanser..
For yr case, the cannot understand/transfer/apply issue (if we talking abt just her level) think may need a bit more work..coz more uncertainties as a whole I feel..already we need to anticipate them losing some marks due to carelessness etc.. but still I think not give her too much stress if she is ganjiong type..
I think slmkhoo's methods on reducing carelessness should be workable..mine I feel already reached a stage, whereby say yes yes also just to make us happy only.. it is ok la, she is considered very independent now..her dad used to say, she is now in a safe environment to learn to fall and pick herself up.. -
But patpatrol, yr dd is only 7yo…give her some time… another consideration why I don’t get her checked… due to some circumstances she needs to learn new language along the way…so it is really not fair to her lor. If checked and to compare to her peers, I think her problems will be a list long… kids will mature over time…but I do agree, if condition is serious, early intervention may help la…
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MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1966154\" time=\"1583660694\" user_id=\"43981:
Yes, this is true. In an assessment by a psychologist, there will be results in different categories. A child may be assessed as having high reasoning skills (generally equated to intelligence) but have other issues like poor working memory, low attention span etc. The child can use his intelligence to offset some of the other issues, but it will always be more of a struggle, with more time and energy spent on such issues than other kids. For some kids, they can figure it out for themselves as they grow; for others, they may need more explicit help to learn coping strategies. Without help, some kids will sub-optimise and may become underachievers.
...my own understanding is a kid can have avg/above avg brain but also can have other underlying problems?? -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"1966164\" time=\"1583672567\" user_id=\"28674:
The more I talk / think about it, thinking on the consistency/results/cher suggesting test etc, sometimes do get abit suspicious..but when look at her, talk to her, all worries will just go off naturally de..I prefer to think it that way
Yes, this is true. In an assessment by a psychologist, there will be results in different categories. A child may be assessed as having high reasoning skills (generally equated to intelligence) but have other issues like poor working memory, low attention span etc. The child can use his intelligence to offset some of the other issues, but it will always be more of a struggle, with more time and energy spent on such issues than other kids. For some kids, they can figure it out for themselves as they grow; for others, they may need more explicit help to learn coping strategies. Without help, some kids will sub-optimise and may become underachievers.MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1966154\" time=\"1583660694\" user_id=\"43981:
...my own understanding is a kid can have avg/above avg brain but also can have other underlying problems??
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MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1966189\" time=\"1583684411\" user_id=\"43981:
The questions we asked ourselves when deciding or not whether to test, and provide therapies (at home, in our case), and ask for accommodations was: given what we see as her level of intelligence/ability, does it seem that she is underachieving? And is there anything we or the \"system\" could do to help her achieve her potential?
The more I talk / think about it, thinking on the consistency/results/cher suggesting test etc, sometimes do get abit suspicious..but when look at her, talk to her, all worries will just go off naturally de..I prefer to think it that way
For our daughter, in the early years, she was underachieving mostly because of poor attention and motor skills, so we tried to help with that. We couldn't make her \"just like everyone else\", but she improved enough that she was suffering less when trying to keep up with schoolwork and school activities. We also saw that social skills was getting in the way, not so much of academic achievement, but of life in general, so we tried to help with that. You would also be surprised (we were) that social skills can really get in the way of academic life too - not knowing how to respond to or deal with teachers and classmates, being excluded from groups, not understanding the requirements, etc.
Our next hurdle is to help her get an internship and eventually a job. She is enroute to get a reasonable academic qualification, but she performs very poorly at interviews. We believe that she can do certain types of jobs well, if only she can land one. We have recently approached SG Enable for assistance in finding an internship this year. We're not sure how this will work out, but we have to try.
So back to my first point - if you feel your daughter is underachieving based on your assessment of her abilities (academic and other aspects), it may be good to work on specific skills to improve her eventual outcome.
Parents do have to try to be objective about this - we get used to our own child, and may think there's nothing the matter; or we feel that our child should be the top of everything, because we think he's perfect. It would be unkind to push a child beyond what he can realistically achieve, but also unkind not to try to help if the child is being hampered by something that could be improved with some effort. We also need to think long-term - long-term underachievement can be a burden as the child grows and matures, but early over-achievement can equally be damaging. -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"1966215\" time=\"1583716187\" user_id=\"28674:
the last para to target the issue is the more difficult part to me..over the years, I kept telling myself to accept whatever outcomes that may be..even telling myself ok for her to go to private institutions etc but of course sometimes I do feel abit 'heartache' thinking abt future ..also to avoid frictions/dents in our relationship..I m not sure about other kids her age, mine I feel like growing up too fast in terms of listening and following all the things I say..from a rather mild temperament kid with some 'bullies' around her, it changes her to be a kid that could better protect herself, I should be happy as I helped her raised some issues to her FT during lower pri..nowadays she will go and tell cher if she finds anything too distractive to her..she told me that she just want to study properly..just noticed she communicates more with some of her chers.. team work as always quite weak..she can raise her ideas etc but the others usually a clique will not listen kind of thing lor. at this stage, they are quite a number of WA group chats, but she doesn't really bother what they talking..even I find many talk quite out of scope one..probably abit boring to her..
The questions we asked ourselves when deciding or not whether to test, and provide therapies (at home, in our case), and ask for accommodations was: given what we see as her level of intelligence/ability, does it seem that she is underachieving? And is there anything we or the \"system\" could do to help her achieve her potential?MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"1966189\" time=\"1583684411\" user_id=\"43981:
The more I talk / think about it, thinking on the consistency/results/cher suggesting test etc, sometimes do get abit suspicious..but when look at her, talk to her, all worries will just go off naturally de..I prefer to think it that way
For our daughter, in the early years, she was underachieving mostly because of poor attention and motor skills, so we tried to help with that. We couldn't make her \"just like everyone else\", but she improved enough that she was suffering less when trying to keep up with schoolwork and school activities. We also saw that social skills was getting in the way, not so much of academic achievement, but of life in general, so we tried to help with that. You would also be surprised (we were) that social skills can really get in the way of academic life too - not knowing how to respond to or deal with teachers and classmates, being excluded from groups, not understanding the requirements, etc.
Our next hurdle is to help her get an internship and eventually a job. She is enroute to get a reasonable academic qualification, but she performs very poorly at interviews. We believe that she can do certain types of jobs well, if only she can land one. We have recently approached SG Enable for assistance in finding an internship this year. We're not sure how this will work out, but we have to try.
So back to my first point - if you feel your daughter is underachieving based on your assessment of her abilities (academic and other aspects), it may be good to work on specific skills to improve her eventual outcome.
slmkhoo, your dd is doing very well and she is very fortunate to have you as a mom.. -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"1966149\" time=\"1583655798\" user_id=\"28674:
Thanks again for sharing strategies. Did you try helping your DD to improve her attention through diet? Like restricting sugar, taking supplements like fish oil or food with high dopamine? Mine loves sweet treats and can be motivated by this. So it’s a way to get her to push herself to focus and complete her task. After reading up on this area, I am wondering have I been doing the wrong thing and if sugar may actually worsen her condition?
If it's weakness in understanding, then you will need to figure out why, and then address those issues directly. Go right back to basics and make sure she masters the foundation; worksheets will have to come later.patpatrol\" post_id=\"1966145\" time=\"1583654636\" user_id=\"184545:
I would say generally half her mistakes are due to carelessness/ not reading the question (linked to her inattention) and half her mistakes are due to her weakness in the subject, can’t understand or transfer and apply what she has supposedly learnt. Does this sound serious?
If she is not reading the question carefully, that habit has to be trained bit by bit. First, sit beside her. Make her read the question aloud slowly. Ask her to tell you what she needs to do, step by step, without writing anything down yet. Get her to do those steps one by one on paper until she gets the answer. You may have to guide her like this for days, weeks, even months - it will always take more repetitions than you think is needed. After she gets into the habit to breaking things down like that, then you have to monitor that she always does this for every question. If she doesn't, make her repeat the steps with you. Eventually, she will build up the habit. Of course, as she improves her understanding, some steps can be skipped or done simultaneously, but she should be made to do them sequentially initially.
This step by step method should reduce carelessness too. Also teach her to check her answer by a different method (repeating the same steps will usually mean she will repeat the mistake). Again, checking has to become a habit.
I can't say anything about brain training and other therapies, but you can try to help your child develop a longer attention span through doing things she enjoys. Set aside uninterrupted time for her to do whatever it is she likes, and encourage her to stick to it for as long as possible before getting distracted. Try to give her a space when she is not likely to be distracted, and try not to ask her to do something in the middle of the activity. Again, this will help her biuld a habit of staying with 1 thing for longer.
Thanks.
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