All About ADHD : Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
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Funz\" post_id=\"2105082\" time=\"1681275438\" user_id=\"6230:
Somehow feel abit relieved reading this. Maybe I should change the way I look at these. Sometimes I do feel I m giving dds stress by being 'controlling'. Seriously nowadays don't know if they are doing something serious or watching YouTube/play games coz need use the electronic devices so much.
This kind of behaviour happen even with us adults. 'Caught up' is what I will describe your daughter. She is caught up in all the stuff that is happening and is more in reactive mode than proactive mode. Which is a lot of us anyways.
So many things happening and we are handling all that needs to be done, come lunch time, not hungry so eat only a little or maybe even skip lunch could also be no appetite cos busy. Then when the hunger pangs start hitting, things are running at full speed, not possible to step out to grab a quick bite, so tahan, by end of the day, totally burn out.
I believe this is a very familiar scenario with a lot of us. I am still guilty of such behaviour a few times a year. :oops:
Unfortunately I do not have any solution for you, DD and DS behave like this as well especially when it comes crunch time in their academic year or competition time. I will remind them not to push themselves too far or they might fall sick even before they reach the finishing line and all will be wasted.
I do step in and put my foot down if I feel that they are stretching themselves too thin. I have done things like threaten DS that I will pull the plug of his computer and confiscate the power adapter if he does not stop doing his work and go to sleep when he was still mugging at 2am on a school night after a few consecutive nights of 2am mugging.
DD is worse as she has a bit of a 'hyper' streak in her. She wants to do so many things all at once and will sacrifice sleep and meals just so she can squeeze time to do these stuff. And most of which are not school related, they are her interest of the moment.
Yup she did mention no time etc. -
Imp75\" post_id=\"2105079\" time=\"1681273824\" user_id=\"2358:
Imp, very different person now ..that's why I always say I m confused lor. But somehow deep inside my heart I know she is those can survive when get thrown into a situation..let's hope it is still true.
Sounds like a smart independent girl….. -
Imp75\" post_id=\"2105073\" time=\"1681272054\" user_id=\"2358:
There are often many different things that contribute to behaviour. In this boy's case, it could be a combination of boredom, disinterest (in Chinese, especially), poor discipline, ADHD, poor executive function... Sometimes it hard to distinguish what is what. The problem with intervention is that it's very much up to parents to do it, continually and consistently. Teachers don't have the bandwidth with 29 or 39 other kids in the class; a once a week therapy session is fairly pointless without parents doing their part the rest of the time. I've heard parents say they've tried and nothing works, but often they've tried to farm it out to others, or they haven't persevered (like for 3 years, not just 3 months).
Ok young boy does exhibit classroom disruptive behaviour like talking to classmates when completed work early, walking around classroom with disregard for authority. But boy is indeed smart, chatty and not afraid of strangers, no patience to complete task on hand too. Also commit many careless mistakes in class for Chinese only. Strange so many times parent was called in for boy’s behaviour but none suggested intervention means so ??
Often, the \"therapy\" is behavioural - you can dress is up in fancy names, but it's basically building discipline and routine, with some accommodations where necessary. It will seem very basic when you spell it out, but over time, it can make a huge difference. I believe that all the hours I put in with my daughter have really paid off. But kids are not identical, and so what works for one may not for another; but if the parent tries what is in the general advice for such kids, and uses common sense, at least some of it will help. -
Imp75\" post_id=\"2105096\" time=\"1681277455\" user_id=\"2358:
Enrichment class activities and tasks are often shorter in duration? My kids didn't attend any, but that's what I'm guessing. And they may be more engaging and interesting (parents are paying good money!), and in small groups where there's less waiting for everyone to get to the same point. Not sure it's comparable to a school classroom situation.
Good idea. Boy attended tienhsia and abacus……seems to be no issue finishing work le…. -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"2105107\" time=\"1681280955\" user_id=\"28674:
A regular P2 enrichment/tuition lesson (eg Chinese tuition) is around 1.5 hours, versus one period in school is 30 min. Sometimes the kids in lower primary may have double periods (1 hour). So I think it is a somewhat reasonable way to compare and see whether the child can survive the whole enrichment lesson without walking around.
Enrichment class activities and tasks are often shorter in duration? My kids didn't attend any, but that's what I'm guessing. And they may be more engaging and interesting (parents are paying good money!), and in small groups where there's less waiting for everyone to get to the same point. Not sure it's comparable to a school classroom situation.
If the enrichment teacher feedbacks the similar short attention span, then it is quite a sure sign of ADHD. Eg DS had a tuition classmate who would keep asking permission to go toilet, every week, every 10min. Come back from “toilet break” with McD french fries or bubble tea. Shake his leg until the whole (shared) table shook. Nobody wanted to share table with him otherwise cannot write notes properly.
I believe ADHD kids (especially the H ones) somehow feel the need to seek extra stimulation / excitement to overcome what they feel are too mundane in life. Somehow to a greater extent than what is socially acceptable. Whether they have the awareness that they are more than the norm, this is something they may or may not come to realize on their own. Maybe this is where professional coaching can help. -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"2105099\" time=\"1681280127\" user_id=\"28674:
From what DS described to me, I dont think it is ASD cos the boy is able to socialize fine outside the classroom. His disruptive behaviours are not the typical stimming or meltdowns of ASD but that he will come up with new ways and means to make his day in class more exciting, less dull for himself. Usually something loud or must throw things here and there. Or tilt his chair and fall over etc. Thankfully not violent towards others.
This sounds more like ASD (which is often comorbid with ADHD). -
MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"2105100\" time=\"1681280157\" user_id=\"43981:
Parenting is indeed both an art as well as science, some good reads... (in general, not relating to this forum topic though)
Somehow feel abit relieved reading this. Maybe I should change the way I look at these. Sometimes I do feel I m giving dds stress by being 'controlling'. Seriously nowadays don't know if they are doing something serious or watching YouTube/play games coz need use the electronic devices so much.
Yup she did mention no time etc.
https://www.schoolbag.edu.sg/story/what-happened-when-i-stopped-nagging-my-kids
https://www.schoolbag.edu.sg/story/raising-a-teenager-is-like-flying-a-kite-learn-when-to-pull-in-or-let-go -
zac's mum\" post_id=\"2105145\" time=\"1681286442\" user_id=\"53606:[quote=\"zac's mum\" post_id=2105145 time=1681286442 user_id=53606]
Looks like something needs to be done! If it's not ASD, then it could quite severe ADHD! Perhaps they could try medication.
From what DS described to me, I dont think it is ASD cos the boy is able to socialize fine outside the classroom. His disruptive behaviours are not the typical stimming or meltdowns of ASD but that he will come up with new ways and means to make his day in class more exciting, less dull for himself. Usually something loud or must throw things here and there. Or tilt his chair and fall over etc. Thankfully not violent towards others.[/quote] -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"2105152\" time=\"1681288731\" user_id=\"28674:
Unfortunately I don’t know what happened to this particular boy after PSLE as they are not in touch.
Looks like something needs to be done! If it's not ASD, then it could quite severe ADHD! Perhaps they could try medication.
But there are other similar cases in my DS’ mainstream secondary school. Slightly less spectacular disruptions but the teachers and the boys are generally quite tolerant towards them. My boy, he himself knows how difficult it is (he had milder symptoms in P1 which lessened over time), so he will just watch as “entertainment” and tell me about such stories at home.
At age 10 he once “tsked” & shook his head at a younger boy (around age 7) at the neighbouring table in a restaurant for falling off his own chair while fidgeting. I told him straight off: “Don’t tsk, you did exactly the same thing at that age!” -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"2105099\" time=\"1681280127\" user_id=\"28674:
I somehow always remember the word executive function(?) mentioned by you several years back. May be connected. Ok..I will read up on ASD.
This sounds more like ASD (which is often comorbid with ADHD).
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