Living in Singapore
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lee_yl\" post_id=\"2131168\" time=\"1711084713\" user_id=\"17023:
It’s not about what you posted in KSP, it is about what you believe in, that one really needs to think carefully before raising children because they will be victims if a marriage fails. If you really believe in this statement, why don’t you share it with your son so that he would be more mindful?
, Since DS has been suffering from a fail marriage or I put it as a separation of parents since he was 5 year old, do I need to remind him again how much a child has to suffer from a separation of parents? :scratchhead:
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Imp75\" post_id=\"2131122\" time=\"1711007416\" user_id=\"2358:
The earlier anecdote I shared can save some couples’ marriages from breaking up but it does not mean it will save of all the cases out there.
Indeed. Some are still inside a loveless marriage for the sake of the children and even when kids grew up, still stay on to the marriage but had been sleeping in separate rooms since kids were young. When asked why, they said there is no need to divorce to put a “label” on the kids. Even when kids grew up, there is no need for divorce to “divide” assets or house ownership etc which proves to be too messy. They each lead their own lives and only come back to the residence to sleep. From the outside, they are still considered a complete family and each has no intention to settle down with someone else..
Like what MyPillow shared earlier, some men if no kids, may find excuses not to go home early or don’t even bother to go home. After 30yrs, some marriages no more passion left, only a sense of responsibility and obligation. I believe many men think of their children (and not their wives), they will go home. 女人剩下人老珠黄，能给老公渴望回的是幸福的家庭、可爱的孩子.
Like HK actress / actor Charmine Sheh and Kevin Cheng. Both enjoyed 二人世界 for many many years but when it’s time to 传宗接代，Kevin Cheng left the mature Charmine and married a younger lady after a whirlwind courtship. This young lady immediately gave birth to 3 sons in quick succession for Kevin. Women always at the losing end. -
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2131170\" time=\"1711086517\" user_id=\"17023:
Kevin Cheng was a playboy, he has stayed with Singer,Linda Wong王馨平 for a few years and Linda had undergone abortion in order not to affect Cheng's career (according to Apple Daily in Hong Kong).
The earlier anecdote I shared can save some couples’ marriages from breaking up but it does not mean it will save of all the cases out there.
Like what MyPillow shared earlier, some men if no kids, may find excuses not to go home early or don’t even bother to go home. After 30yrs, some marriages no more passion left, only a sense of responsibility and obligation. I believe many men think of their children (and not their wives), they will go home. 女人剩下人老珠黄，能给老公渴望回的是幸福的家庭、可爱的孩子.
Like HK actress / actor Charmine Sheh and Kevin Cheng. Both enjoyed 二人世界 for many many years but when it’s time to 传宗接代，Kevin Cheng left the mature Charmine and married a younger lady after a whirlwind courtship. This young lady immediately gave birth to 3 sons in quick succession for Kevin. Women always at the losing end.
As a wife, do you happy when your marriage only left with the responsibility and obligation to the kids? A husband can stay with his mistress for dinner or fooling around whole night ...,etc but will go home to sleep because of his responsibility towards the kids, not the passion and love for his wife. How cruel is this for his wife and the kids? The wife can have his body but you cannot have his heart, do you think it is good for the wife and kids? 做女人,要做到这样吗? :frustrated: -
The story between Kevin Cheng and Linda Wong is that of a lovelorn couple broken up by a disproving father (Jimmy Wong 王羽). Kevin Cheng had often refuted the malicious rumour about Linda Wong’s alleged abortion. Linda Wong also shared about her struggles to conceive and it is just unfair to attribute a lady’s inability to conceive to a (cooked-up) previous abortion.
Anyway, Kevin Cheng could well be a playboy when he was younger but from what I see now, he is a fun loving dad and good husband. So make sure our daughters don’t end up with playboys who just want to enjoy a lovey dovey honeymoon and when the time comes, just jet off to look for a younger wife to carry on the family line. Men can afford to do that but definitely not women.
Your question posed, whether a wife can be happy or not if marriage is only left responsibility and obligations. How would I know???? It is not as if my DH got mistress or what. :?
There is no need to be so extreme in one’s world view lah. Majority of married men are decent and responsible without mistress or having girlfriends by the sideline. My own personal experience, DH is a workaholic but would put down his work to rush home when any of our kids called him when they need help in their school work. Men can be responsible fathers and caring husbands too. -
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2131174\" time=\"1711099364\" user_id=\"17023:
wah! yours is a model father / husband! Nice that your kids look to and trust their daddy for help!
Majority of married men are decent and responsible without mistress or having girlfriends by the sideline. My own personal experience, DH is a workaholic but would put down his work to rush home when any of our kids called him when they need help in their school work. Men can be responsible fathers and caring husbands too.
i am not sure whether is a reflection of our (lack of) prowess but our kids since Sec 1 have looked for Google or teachers for help with school work and not us. They probably think we are outdated or not in the know, oops.
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要老公body only改什么。。 for many of us, 你要你拉去吧， 💰放下
Joke aside, imho marriage without kids can be happy but with kids also another type of happiness. Let me choose again, I will choose the same cycle. -
Is it because of daughters (only?). My husband tho no hands on with their studies. Recently, he pouted his lips, the next morning after I scolded the girls…he says why did you scold our daughters. They are our daughters you know…I was trying hard to hold my laughter lol.
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One of my nephew & only son of one of my SIL, married his sweetheart but after marriage they jointly decided not to hv kids but hv 2 lovely doggies with one aircond room dedicated to the dogs.
Now, the elderly couple busy themselves with 4 grandchildren fr their daughter. They used to be high flying professionals (literally flying frequently for work & the kids go for 2 overseas vacations a year and s’times 3. Ano SIL made comments that nephew shld persuade wife to hv children, and as a midwife, she claims that women who doesn’t hv kids will develop endometriosis & the like in their womb (as if replacements). I used to cringed at her claims, but well I’m still abit traditional in my viewpoints abt family & procreation. Tho I won’t go along with “must maintain the male lineage” thingy, I look more on the couple aging years & support fr younger family member(s) wld be enriching. Anyway, it’s still their life. Not for me to comment unless they want my opinion. I love him all the same. -
MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"2131178\" time=\"1711103300\" user_id=\"43981:
:scared: why you scold people? I have never scold people except my colleagues :rotflmao:
Is it because of daughters (only?). My husband tho no hands on with their studies. Recently, he pouted his lips, the next morning after I scolded the girls..he says why did you scold our daughters. They are our daughters you know..I was trying hard to hold my laughter lol. -
An old friend of mine, got married at age 24, two yrs after grad from uni. Alr decided not to have kids. "signed" contract with her bf before marriage to not have kids. Guy is neutral but ok not to have kids too (i guess). Hence got married. However, his parents are not aware of this pact until today. Even few years back, parents still advised them to seek medical help. Anyway, both migrated to another country years back, complained abt sg tax and setup are all pro family, so households without kids have no perks, no security? at all. Now they have a house fully paid and yes two dogs.
In this case, the girl is adamant not to have kids, but i guess the guy is neutral. I do believe she is the non compromise herself type of person, so she herself knows, cannot have kids.
Also, she mentioned abt risks of having special needs kids is high these days. Is this true?
Perfectionist like her may not know how to handle it. So many parents of children with medical or special needs out there, really admirable of them. I used to think my friend should have a kid back then, but they have their own lifestyle now, also happy for them. It’s fated.
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