Me Time!
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zac's mum\" post_id=\"2134626\" time=\"1717490428\" user_id=\"53606:[quote=\"zac's mum\" post_id=2134626 time=1717490428 user_id=53606]
Their standards are often higher than women's! But that is because they don't do it often. Make them do it every week, for years on end, and it will be different, I'm sure. The main issue, I feel, is the expectation that women should carry the \"mental burden\" of housecare and childcare. I've escaped having to fight that issue because I became a SAHM or only worked part-time, and willingly took on that part of the family work since I didn't have to work outside the home 8 hrs a day. But if I'd had to work full-time, I think I would either have employed a maid, or fought hard to convince my husband to do more at home. I believe that things will change for some couples of the next generation.
Actually the men are fully capable of washing toilets. One of DS’ VIA tasks was to wash the school toilet. And during NS also need to make own bed and scrub toilet bowl to impeccable standards,
isn’t it?[/quote] -
doodbug\" post_id=\"2134613\" time=\"1717485349\" user_id=\"13281:
I'm coming from a different angle - SAHM who is firm that I will not be a slave to meals, neither do we have the means to eat out often if we want healthy food. Since my kids have seen me cook most meals all their lives, they assume that most meals will be cooked and eaten at home. But since they have a mother who doesn't really enjoy cooking and has low standards where food is concerned, they have grown up eating my one-dish meals without complaints. My husband has set the example of never complaining or asking for fancier meals, and the girls have followed his example. They have seen that making healthy, relatively OK one-dish meals doesn't require a great deal planning or preparation or cleaning up, and they have watched me cook ahead, and use shortcuts a lot! So my daughter will probably cook some meals once she has her own home, though not every day. I guess my family is quite unique in foodie Singapore in that they are willing to accept low standards in food.
I am a working mom and I have a helper. The only reason why I have homecooked food, is because I have a helper.
I used to cook on Sundays as my helper has every Sunday off. But frankly, it did not give me great joy or what. It's easier for me to tapao and assemble a potpourri of food from outside for the family to enjoy.
A lot of prep work goes behind cooking. If I am to cook a one dish meal, sometimes, the family would probably prefer assembling their own one dish meals from outside, whether it be a poke bowl to a don don donki bento box or whatever. Cooking multiple dishes entails a lot of planning, prep and cleaning up. I decided I won't spend my Sundays doing so. It's different when I leave the workforce, of course. -
slmkhoo
We are quite alike.
Though am a WOHM, i dont enjoy spending much time cooking or doing household chores. Hence all will be simple/easy and none complained since they dont enjoy doing too.
During the wkends when all at home, depend on my mood, either I will cook or eat out for a change. -
We had a helper until just before Covid. Timing was just right cos it meant I did not have to be responsible for another person during CD and all the restrictions. By that time, kids were already in their teens so they can definitely pitch in.
While slmkhoo and doodbug do not fancy having to slave over a stove, I do not fancy slaving around the house with a vaccum, mop and iron. So we hired a part time cleaner. I do not mind cook so even though I do work full time, I still cook almost daily. But to be fair I am not restricted by company working hours so I can get home by 5pm to prep and cook dinner and after dinner catch up with more work if need be.
Even though we have a helper from the time kids were young, I have insisted that kids be responsible for their own stuff and picking up after themselves. They have their own rooms and toilets so they are responsible for the basic upkeeping of their own areas. When we did away with the full time helper, they were fully responsible including cleaning their own toilets.
Kids prefer that we do not have a helper and though at times they do whine about having to clean their rooms. I do not really bother about how clean or neat their areas are. Basically their areas, their responsibility. If they choose the live in filth so long as that filth does not spill over to the common area or my area, I do not interfere much. So far both have kept their areas decent enough, DS more so than DD. -
Funz\" post_id=\"2134642\" time=\"1717500819\" user_id=\"6230:
This is exactly what I tell my kids!
Kids prefer that we do not have a helper and though at times they do whine about having to clean their rooms. I do not really bother about how clean or neat their areas are. Basically their areas, their responsibility. If they choose the live in filth so long as that filth does not spill over to the common area or my area, I do not interfere much. So far both have kept their areas decent enough, DS more so than DD. -
Funz\" post_id=\"2134642\" time=\"1717500819\" user_id=\"6230:
I must say you are the model for FTWM!
We had a helper until just before Covid. Timing was just right cos it meant I did not have to be responsible for another person during CD and all the restrictions. By that time, kids were already in their teens so they can definitely pitch in.
While slmkhoo and doodbug do not fancy having to slave over a stove, I do not fancy slaving around the house with a vaccum, mop and iron. So we hired a part time cleaner. I do not mind cook so even though I do work full time, I still cook almost daily. But to be fair I am not restricted by company working hours so I can get home by 5pm to prep and cook dinner and after dinner catch up with more work if need be.
Even though we have a helper from the time kids were young, I have insisted that kids be responsible for their own stuff and picking up after themselves. They have their own rooms and toilets so they are responsible for the basic upkeeping of their own areas. When we did away with the full time helper, they were fully responsible including cleaning their own toilets.
Kids prefer that we do not have a helper and though at times they do whine about having to clean their rooms. I do not really bother about how clean or neat their areas are. Basically their areas, their responsibility. If they choose the live in filth so long as that filth does not spill over to the common area or my area, I do not interfere much. So far both have kept their areas decent enough, DS more so than DD.
When days we didn’t hv helpers, my family will chip in. I can’t live with untidiness tho. I’m a cleanliness ‘freak’ and will look into the details to ensure a clean environment. I’m glad I found easy solutions to rid lizards, ants & cockroaches.
Laundry is easy. I just don’t like washing dishes & thankfully, DH has always been the one willing to take over the washing at the start of our marriage.
I don’t think I can be a FTWM & able to keep home w/o a helper or keep my sanity like how Funz managed. Kudos to her abilities to juggle well! -
slmkhoo\" post_id=\"2134635\" time=\"1717493542\" user_id=\"28674:
In recent years, my kids would rather have my one-dish cheat meal (usually a hearty stew of sorts), than having to go out for a meal! I notice that kids nowadays seem to have very punishing school schedules - my kids treasure every single moment they have at home and are reluctant to leave the house when they don't have to. My DS continued this way and felt it even more acutely after enlisting in NS - he loves his room and bed haha.
I'm coming from a different angle - SAHM who is firm that I will not be a slave to meals, neither do we have the means to eat out often if we want healthy food. Since my kids have seen me cook most meals all their lives, they assume that most meals will be cooked and eaten at home. But since they have a mother who doesn't really enjoy cooking and has low standards where food is concerned, they have grown up eating my one-dish meals without complaints. My husband has set the example of never complaining or asking for fancier meals, and the girls have followed his example. They have seen that making healthy, relatively OK one-dish meals doesn't require a great deal planning or preparation or cleaning up, and they have watched me cook ahead, and use shortcuts a lot! So my daughter will probably cook some meals once she has her own home, though not every day. I guess my family is quite unique in foodie Singapore in that they are willing to accept low standards in food.
Also, I think the outside food in Singapore has gotten saltier and more savoury over the years. We all cannot tolerate the likes of Encik Tan or Watami, and would rather come home to toasted bread and cream cheese and a cuppa latte. -
Doodbug, I love how simple your meal is…toasted bread and cream cheese and a cuppa latte…I shall try that too.
Nowadays I cook mainly a meat dish. Cannot eat too much now will feel ‘torturous’ to need of finishing the food. During holidays, we usually eat our lunch of just noodles and snacks.
Dd been watching what she eats. Already they eat usually 1 meal at home. Sometimes she will just cook whatever she wants to eat instead of my cooked meals for the quota of food intake. The more I feel I don’t need to cook si often. -
doodbug\" post_id=\"2134647\" time=\"1717507481\" user_id=\"13281:
Same with my kids - they much prefer to eat at home except for special occasions. I find it funny (but also feel appreciated) that they actually like my one-dish meals and look forward to them after a vacation or busy weekend when we've eaten out a lot. We all find outside food increasingly salty or sweet or rich, which is not really to our taste since we are all used to my simpler cooking. And buying simple/plainer food outside is less convenient, more expensive and really not worth the trouble - I find it easier to just whip up something at home. I usually try to have a few items to speed the process if I'm pressed for time - like frozen pre-cooked meat & hardy veg in a stirfry with rice.
In recent years, my kids would rather have my one-dish cheat meal (usually a hearty stew of sorts), than having to go out for a meal! I notice that kids nowadays seem to have very punishing school schedules - my kids treasure every single moment they have at home and are reluctant to leave the house when they don't have to. My DS continued this way and felt it even more acutely after enlisting in NS - he loves his room and bed haha.
Also, I think the outside food in Singapore has gotten saltier and more savoury over the years. We all cannot tolerate the likes of Encik Tan or Watami, and would rather come home to toasted bread and cream cheese and a cuppa latte. -
MrsKiasu\" post_id=\"2134652\" time=\"1717545249\" user_id=\"43981:
plus some nuts, fruits & a small serving of ice-cream
Doodbug, I love how simple your meal is..toasted bread and cream cheese and a cuppa latte..I shall try that too.
Nowadays I cook mainly a meat dish. Cannot eat too much now will feel 'torturous' to need of finishing the food. During holidays, we usually eat our lunch of just noodles and snacks.
Dd been watching what she eats. Already they eat usually 1 meal at home. Sometimes she will just cook whatever she wants to eat instead of my cooked meals for the quota of food intake. The more I feel I don't need to cook si often.
simple joys of life
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