PM Lee urges more babies in Year of Rabbit

[Herbie]

Is not just competitive for entry into P1… it will be also competitive for entry into uni…

[laughingcat]

janet_lee88:

Our parents have done a great deal looking after us...so to ask them to look after their grandchildren now is asking too much from them. They have done their part. My mum prefers doing the marketing and cooking as compared to looking after kids. Have a maid is not a solution, but at least someone can do the manual work while grandparents keep an eye on the little hyperactive ones.

I beg to differ.....as in line with the government, people used to think that grandparents will comes in handy in helping the young couples to look after kids. Not everyone is as lucky as you - having parents to stay with you and do the marketing and cooking. For some who does not have the grandparental support, having a maid is a necessity. This was what is currently being debated in the other thread http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?t=18613&start=70

There are others who were so unlucky to have your parents \"playing you out\" in looking after grandchildren.

Having a maid for some are not necessarily being engaged them in looking after kids. For some, engaging the help of the the maid in the household chores.

[phankao]

laughingcat:

I beg to differ.....as in line with the government, people used to think that grandparents will comes in handy in helping the young couples to look after kids. Not everyone is as lucky as you - having parents to stay with you and do the marketing and cooking. For some who does not have the grandparental support, having a maid is a necessity. This was what is currently being debated in the other thread http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?t=18613&start=70


There are others who were so unlucky to have your parents \"playing you out\" in looking after grandchildren.

Having a maid for some are not necessarily being engaged them in looking after kids. For some, engaging the help of the the maid in the household chores.

And what makes you think we have grandparents able to look after our children? How about being the one that is responsible to look after the children on our own? If not, why would I talk about exhaustion and stress?

Gee, I do have my MIL staying with us, but no, she is not relied on to do the cooking, marketing, looking after grandchildren. She is incapable of doing so.

[laughingcat]

phankao:

And what makes you think we have grandparents able to look after our children? How about being the one that is responsible to look after the children on our own? If not, why would I talk about exhaustion and stress?

Gee, I do have my MIL staying with us, but no, she is not relied on to do the cooking, marketing, looking after grandchildren. She is incapable of doing so.

I think you have missed the point here. For sure I do not relied on grandparents to look after grandchildren. For me, getting an additional help in household chores will definitely relieve my stress. So that I can concentrate in looking after my own kids. An additional \"hand\" will help me especially when my kiddies fall sick or when I coach my kids during the night.

I don't know about your condition on exhaustion and stress. But I do know I was totally exhausted and stressed when my Ist boy was constantly sick and hubby constantly out of town for work for over a year. After the birth of my 2nd child and with workload piling, I was on medication as I was in depression. That strike me that I needed additional help before I go out of hand. That is how I managed my own exhaustion and stress by getting additional help which is engaging FDW. I believe for once is....different families managed differently. To me there is no right or wrong in how you manage your own household. There is no point in arguing whether one family needs extra hand in the form of FDW or by grandparents or by CCs. I will respect any families' way of managing their own household or their own lives.

Since this is for sharing......I wish to air my wishes - hoping the government can look further in optimising the current scheme in taking a bolder measure in considering the maid levy for parents who have 2 or more kids. And not just monetary system such as baby bonus. Having a robust system for long run to me is having better supports. With today higher inflation, it is quite difficult for any single-income-young-family to manage especially for families with more than 1 kid.

[tamarind]

laughingcat,

I totally agree with what you have written.

There were a few times when my boy was ill and I had to rush him to the hospital in the middle of the night. I have a job that does not allow me to take leave whenever I like it. I still have to go to work at 8am, and my work involves a lot of walking and talking at the top of my voice. Without a maid or my mother to help out, I would have suffered a breakdown long ago.

I totally agree with you that different families manage differently. I admire those who are very fortunate to be able to manage without maids, but these people really should not be telling other mommies that they can also manage without maids, because they really do not know what kind of problems other people are going through.

I totally agree with you that \"there is no point in arguing whether one family needs extra hand in the form of FDW or by grandparents or by CCs.\"

You are absolutely right about the maid levy, it should be removed. I believe that the government will realize this soon, I am very sure that the birth rate will go below 1.0 within the next few years. They will probably start to subsidize the maid's salary too. Otherwise, be prepared to see even more immigrants and foreign workers. Right now, only about 60% of the resident population are Singapore citizens :
http://www.singstat.gov.sg/pubn/popn/c2010acr.pdf

I think that the government really has to give much better incentives. One of my wish is for each of my child to be able to own a HDB flat before 10 years old , and allow parents to use CPF to pay for it. Then I can buy over my neighbour's flat and use it collect rental money when my kids are still young.

[janet88]

laughingcat:

janet_lee88:

Our parents have done a great deal looking after us...so to ask them to look after their grandchildren now is asking too much from them. They have done their part. My mum prefers doing the marketing and cooking as compared to looking after kids. Have a maid is not a solution, but at least someone can do the manual work while grandparents keep an eye on the little hyperactive ones.

I beg to differ.....as in line with the government, people used to think that grandparents will comes in handy in helping the young couples to look after kids. Not everyone is as lucky as you - having parents to stay with you and do the marketing and cooking.

What I meant to say is that my mum would rather do cooking rather than looking after kids. BTW, my parents do not stay with me.
I looked after both my kids. With first one who was born with cleft, I had to learn how to feed him. When 2nd one came about, hubby and I had no choice but to get a maid. It was very tight financially but what choice did we have ? Even though the maid was on my nerves then, I had to close 2 eyes bcos I needed her to help look after my younger one while I coached older one in his studies.

[janet88]

Honestly, I would love to have a helper to do the housework so that I can coach the kids in their studies without having to hang up the wet laundry half-way while coaching them. A helper at this point would be very helpful bcos both my kids are in primary school and much attention is required with their school work.


If the govt can stop charging maid levy, then perhaps this amt can be added to the maid’s salary…it’s just ridiculous that we have to pay maid levy to the govt when they are NOT doing anything at all. Of course, paying a newbie maid close to $700 is not worth it but what choice do parents have, esp working parents.

[tankee]

i think the maid levy is to level the playing field for our locals domestic helpers.

[janet88]

tankee:

i think the maid levy is to level the playing field for our locals domestic helpers.

When we have maids, our expenses are really high bcos we have to feed another person. Diff households have diff purposes to hire a maid. In a house, there is no such thing as nothing to do. As kids grow, maids are for diff purposes. If I have one to do household and cook, I think my children will benefit from my full attention.

Hi laughing cat,
I'm also on medication for depression.

[verykiasu2010]

tankee:

i think the maid levy is to level the playing field for our locals domestic helpers.

local domestic helpers will still cost much much more than levy + salary + cpf......

i thought it is a stated objective of MOM to reduce dependency on maid via the levy ?

if the family has children less than 12 y/o, the levy is at concessionary rate. the moment the child reaches 12 y/o, IMMEDIATELY the concession is removed