How to tell if a child is gifted?

[pea]

Maybe I was in a rush yesterday and did not make my meaning clear.


I did not mean that late developers will always turn out better than early geniuses. I just see from examples around me, that the "early geniuses" often carry a heavy burden of expectations from their parents and people around them. This made some of them burn out, or rebel. The late developers, on the other hand, often don’t have the weight of high expectations on their shoulders, and that may have helped somewhat in their success in later life.

Anyway, the crux is (and this is where I agree with Chief), that there is too much emphasis on the academic achievements of these young geniuses. Character, charisma, and interpersonal skills are as essential factors for success in life, if not more so. Examples of this abound and I’m sure I do not need to go into them.

I have a gifted nephew, and my parents often remind my sis : he can become a very successful criminal, if you don’t give him the proper guidance. Nurturing a gifted child is no easy task. My sis quit her high flying job to spend time with him when he started to show signs of delinquence. Now he is doing well in his studies and more importantly, is a more balanced boy with plenty of friends and non-academic hobbies.

[ImMeeMee]

tamarind:

Some kids have superb memory and are able to learn things effortlessly. You may only have to explain things to them once, and they will understand and always remember it. Some parents even claim that they have kids who learn to read on their own. These kids truly have a gift which makes learning so easy for them.


Many children, however, need many repetitions in order to learn something new. I think that these children are the \"normal\" children. Gifted children, as mentioned above, are actually not the normal ones.

There are also a whole range of children between the gifted and the normal range. These children can actually be trained to read very early, or do advance maths, if they were drilled for many hours every day by their parents, or if they were sent to many enrichment classes.

So if a child can recite mulitplication tables up to 10 at 4 years old, or if she can recite 30 tang poems, does it mean that she is really gifted ? It actually depends on how long she took to learn all those things. Has she been drilled for many hours a day ? Or did she simply spend a few mins to memorize each tangshi and then always remember it ? Has she been asked to do many pages of maths worksheets every day ? Only the parents know best. Those \"early geniuses\" who lost steam, could be these type of children who were \"trained geniuses\". A truly gifted child will always be gifted with high learning ability and they will never lose this ability.

Nowadays with so many kids going to so many enrichment classes, it is no wonder than many kids know a lot of advanced knowledge. That is why there is this belief that there are many gifted children, especially in Singapore. But I think that how much a child already knows is not indicative of whether he or she is really gifted or not.

The indication is how fast and how thoroughly can he or she learn new things.

I have 2 kids of very different learning abilities. Some children really need more repetitions to learn compared to others. But with hardwork and consistent learning, these children can also do reasonably well in school. But as parents we should not expect them to be able to perform as well as those kids of very high learning ability. Because if we do, that will mean many many hours of drilling and studying when kids should really be enjoying their childhood. Not getting perfect scores in school does not mean that the child is not going to have a future.

well said.

[pea]

Just read your post, Tamarind. What you say is very sensible.

:celebrate:

[sleepy]

tamarind:

Those \"early geniuses\" who lost steam, could be these type of children who were \"trained geniuses\". A truly gifted child will always be gifted with high learning ability and they will never lose this ability.

Agreed

[sleepy]

I've frequently heard comments like \"I prefer my children to be happy than to push them into GEP\"


1. If truely gifted, no need to push. Giftedness can't be drilled
2. What makes them think that GEP kids are unhappy or even pressurised ??!!

If truely gifted (not trained), I believe they would thrive in an advanced learning environment.

Hey, for all we know, they probably feel more unhappy sitting through 3 years of mainstream syllabus, doing 'simple' stuff :snooze:

[sleepy]

side track a little...


If parents really need to drill something, I think we should drill filial piety whenever opportunities arise. Took me at least a year to see some positive results

This is a long project, have to keep reinforcing


Raising a child with high self-esteem, imparting the right moral values such as honesty, filial, kind heartedness, etc. These are parents' responsiblities regardless of the child's academic performance

My two cents

[smurf]

ChiefKiasu:

smurf:

really ar?I scared by then, too late to learn leh...while he learns timetable, other children may be learning other more advanced things ..my 4.5 yr old boy cannot even recite Tang Shi, and doesn't speak mandarin.

smurf, you kid is perfectly fine, just like the majority of kids of his age that could not even recognise the alphabets. Remember that kindies start teaching reading and writing when the child is 5 years old. There is no need to panic at this point. You can always start him on some of the beginning English/Chinese enrichment courses now, and they should be able to help.

Remember that people peak at different ages. A child that peak too early could be in danger of early burn-out. Do you want your child to be the top PSLE scholar in the country, or do you want him to thrive in the society of the future? While academic excellence opens doors, in the end, it is character, charisma and conviction that carry the person through. Let your child peak at his own time. Support him with the foundation of confidence by being there for him when he needs you.

well said! but hor, hard to follow...cos we are kiasu parents! haha.

[jedamum]

smurf:

wow,,,how come so many kids are so bright now? my 15 mth boy cannot even talk now! much less recite Tang shi or timetable.should I be worry?? :shock:

smurf,
i think it is more appropriate for you to continue the discussion about your kids http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1672&start=0.
being bright and being gifted are different. I believe this thread is for parents with gifted kids to share on how to harness on this gift (or the 'difficulties' faced in raising such inquisitive kids) rather than to debate on whether their giftedness is drilled or inborn.

[smurf]

jedamum,


in no way was I trying to debate anything. I was just wondering why there are so many bright or gifted kids around nowadays compared to the olden days. I wasn’t suggesting anything nor did I try to ‘stir’ any kind of argument/debating here between bright and gifted. Maybe I shouldn’t even join in the discussion since I believe I dun have gifted child.

I believe you were referring to this thread:

Difficulties of having a intellectually gifted child (sorry, dunno how to link the thread) when you mentioned "or the ‘difficulties’ faced in raising such inquisitive kids".

[jedamum]

smurf:

jedamum,


in no way was I trying to debate anything. I was just wondering why there are so many bright or gifted kids around nowadays compared to the olden days. I wasn't suggesting anything nor did I try to 'stir' any kind of argument/debating here between bright and gifted. Maybe I shouldn't even join in the discussion since I believe I dun have gifted child.

I believe you were referring to this thread:

Difficulties of having a intellectually gifted child (sorry, dunno how to link the thread) when you mentioned \"or the 'difficulties' faced in raising such inquisitive kids\".

smurf,
no la. i wasn't referring to you debating anything. i was just thinking that maybe if we discuss our average kids at the average thread, we'll get more people to join in our discussion.
no offence meant, but i hope this thread on teaching gifted kids will remain for parents of gifted kids to share their worries/challenges instead of letting it spiral into some debate (like the other thread) and ended up get http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?t=340&start=0, causing this group of parents the impression that KSP is not all-inclusive: gifted or not

i think you are referring tohttp://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1931&start=0 thread - maybe CKS can merge this topic in there.