All About Full-Time Maids

[Funx3]

Gluttonish:

Maids! with or without them also headache! For some reason, my new maid who has joined me for a week doesn't place my child as her priority!


She goes over to my in-laws house whenever we go to work, and when my DD goes to her pri sch, as there will be no one at home. My DS will arrive in Aug, so she will continue to be at my in-laws house with the newborn after my maternity leave.

She seems to place household chores as her priority, and ignores my instructions whenever i ask her to ensure my DD finishes her meals. Is it really that hard for her to understand that she caring for my children is her main job, instead of busying herself with the household chores at my in-law's place? so pissed! My DD has weight issues, which is why I'm very concerned about her finishing her 3 meals.

Can U Get Your In-laws to check on Her? that is Assuming they R at home.

Also just check, Is she Being Task with Busying Herself for Your in-laws household chores while she's there? Maybe if she cannot finish, kena scolding, or things like that?

Whichever the case, IMHO try to rope in your in-laws help. Or Detail a clear list of things to do at your in-laws, if need be, with time schedule to make sure she spend sufficient time on the Main tasks u assigned her.

Hope that helps.
:celebrate:

[nms1]

Funx3:

Gluttonish:

Maids! with or without them also headache! For some reason, my new maid who has joined me for a week doesn't place my child as her priority!


She goes over to my in-laws house whenever we go to work, and when my DD goes to her pri sch, as there will be no one at home. My DS will arrive in Aug, so she will continue to be at my in-laws house with the newborn after my maternity leave.

She seems to place household chores as her priority, and ignores my instructions whenever i ask her to ensure my DD finishes her meals. Is it really that hard for her to understand that she caring for my children is her main job, instead of busying herself with the household chores at my in-law's place? so pissed! My DD has weight issues, which is why I'm very concerned about her finishing her 3 meals.

Can U Get Your In-laws to check on Her? that is Assuming they R at home.

Also just check, Is she Being Task with Busying Herself for Your in-laws household chores while she's there? Maybe if she cannot finish, kena scolding, or things like that?

Whichever the case, IMHO try to rope in your in-laws help. Or Detail a clear list of things to do at your in-laws, if need be, with time schedule to make sure she spend sufficient time on the Main tasks u assigned her.

Hope that helps.
:celebrate:

I would agree - list down what she should be doing then go through it with both her & your in-laws. Some maids are scared of the older generation and may feel that they have to keep busy or be confused by being told different things by different people. Make sure that there is no miscommunication before taking it any further.

[Gluttonish]

Yup we have a clear list of what to do when she is there, which are really simple household chores. And we have explicitly told her that her main priority is my kids, not the household chores.


I can’t count on my in-laws to help as they are not particular about my kid’s meal, what she eats, and how much she eats etc. Which is part of the reason why i hired a maid to make sure she has the right food to eat, and to have someone to supervise her while she eats.

I’m now contemplating whether to get a portable survelliance camera so that i can monitor them.

[nms1]

Gluttonish:

Yup we have a clear list of what to do when she is there, which are really simple household chores. And we have explicitly told her that her main priority is my kids, not the household chores.


I can't count on my in-laws to help as they are not particular about my kid's meal, what she eats, and how much she eats etc. Which is part of the reason why i hired a maid to make sure she has the right food to eat, and to have someone to supervise her while she eats.

I'm now contemplating whether to get a portable survelliance camera so that i can monitor them.

I think you need to talk to your in-laws. Maybe it's not their priority but that may be causing the problem as they may expect her to carry on doing housework rather than chasing your daughter. It is very hard for maids to manage that kind of situation. I have always told mine that they must tell me if something happens where my mother-in-law is going against what I have told them but it's not easy.

I would suggest that you discuss with them and explain your concerns and what you have asked the maid to do. You might want your husband to talk to them as well.

Putting a camera to watch your in-laws might be a bit tricky

[Gluttonish]

Tricky right? i think maids and in-laws are a woman’s greatest headache, when two combine, its unbeatable.

[BeContented]

Gluttonish:

Tricky right? i think maids and in-laws are a woman's greatest headache, when two combine, its unbeatable.

Ladies, they are the 'perfect combination'.....惊天动地, nobody can get away with it once it gets triggered :stupid:
I have suffered for 6 years.....enjoyed life cos' maidless for 3 years, now back to suffering mode....and now, it's smack right at my face cos' in my house liao.

Honestly, sometimes very difficult for the maid cos' they have to look at sooo many bosses, they dun know what to do. So really need to state your priority clearly to in-laws.....need hubby involvement too if need be....but be prepared, there will still be a lot of grey areas.

Sorry, I just have a 'fight' with MIL, so feel like venting now.
MIL likes to load fridge to max just for a Sun meal that she cook for all. (other days, I'm in-charge). Come every Fri, MIL will lose temper at me/maid claim not enough space for HER food. Last Fri, MIL load to max, Sat made DH go marketing again, so I told DH fridge full, dun get so much. DH came home scold me cos' the mom tear, claiming she got nothing inside. I got so pissed, started dumping my stuff sauces/food etc from the fridge, cleared up 2 shelves for her. MIL fill to brim (even the 2 veg/fruit compartment). After she cooked, leftover a lot.....panic...start instructing maid on leftover ingredient, next day must cook etc etc. DH overheard, questioned & she claim, just a bit left....then passed sarcastic remark at me saying she would be sooooo happy if people leave food for her to cook.....DH glared at MIL to shut up. Lucky she did, I was still fuming with DH for scolding me as tho I'm the one lying. Today, I cooked all MIL's leftover stuff, still have enough for another 2 days. MIL then started scolding maid why didn't cook more ..... cos the fridge still full of her stuff, so she worried. I just cannot imagine how life will be later .....

Also, before DH started going healthy ie. add some brown rice to white rice, I have a small packet for cooking lunch for my kids. After the fridge incident, MIL stopped maid from adding the brown rice, claim I am the ONLY one who wants the brown rice, she does not like and makes the rice hard. So the maid stuck....put or dun??? So I have to ask DH to act....he came home and gave instructions LOUDLY to maid to add in MORE brown rice, MIL silent. So while i'm venting here, poor maid is getting MIL's :rant: outside and I can't do anything......just have to tell maid, try to endure at times. So sometimes, when MIL involved, we need to be a little more lenient to the maid....cos' I feel that sometimes, MIL dare not openly fire us....so they made use of the maid....if u hear what MIL scolds, you'll know what I mean. So maid is a like a shield sometimes........

Oops....just realised I posted at wrong thread.....it should fall under in-law problems.....but since typed liao, will leave it alone :oops:

[Funx3]

cwc:

So while i'm venting here, poor maid is getting MIL's :rant: outside and I can't do anything......just have to tell maid, try to endure at times. So sometimes, when MIL involved, we need to be a little more lenient to the maid....cos' I feel that sometimes, MIL dare not openly fire us....so they made use of the maid....if u hear what MIL scolds, you'll know what I mean. So maid is a like a shield sometimes........

Poor Maid ....
Really Empathise with Her \"Zhu Ba Jie Zhao Jing Zi, Li Wai Bu Shi Ren\" ....

[BeContented]

Funx3:

cwc:

So while i'm venting here, poor maid is getting MIL's :rant: outside and I can't do anything......just have to tell maid, try to endure at times. So sometimes, when MIL involved, we need to be a little more lenient to the maid....cos' I feel that sometimes, MIL dare not openly fire us....so they made use of the maid....if u hear what MIL scolds, you'll know what I mean. So maid is a like a shield sometimes........

Poor Maid ....
Really Empathise with Her \"Zhu Ba Jie Zhao Jing Zi, Li Wai Bu Shi Ren\" ....

Yes, that's why many a times, I close 1 eye cos' her life not that easy. Cannot stand up for her cos' if I do that, MIL will start to be ridiculous & start picking on every single thing. So as long as the basic cleanliness is maintained, the maid better make sure she clean OLD lady's room and do the chores the OLD lady instruct properly. I will still look after my own house eg. vacuum/wipe my own & kids' cabinets, fans & room, do a thorough wash of my room toilet weekly etc.

[peapot]

Gluttonish, you are right!!! I just asked my maid and she admitted that she wants the off day. I have already given in to her praying 5 times a day, long hair, off day what else is next?? Hp??? She smiles and say yes…if not for the supply crunch, I would have axed her!!! Maybe she will ask for boyfriend!!!

[peapot]

Actually mummies, I know its pretty hard to get along with MIL but do you know sometimes its good to have them around? Like my case, I do not have inlaws because they passed away before we got married. So, my gal is brought up by maids and no one else. when the maid goes crazy, I have no one to turn to for help. It would be ideal when you have someone at home with the maid. You will have peace of mind.