All About Full-Time Maids

[hquek]

beanstalk:

Someone I know allows her helper to make kueh and stuff for sale (word of mouth only; her helper keeps what profit there is after deducting the cost price of ingredients).

Better not allow that to happen. I know of an employer (seamstress at home). Her maid was bored and wanted to learn, so the employer allowed her to do some work. Ended up the maid went to MOM to report that the employer was forcing her to work...and the employer kena. Note if MOM blacklist the employer, this person will NOT be able to hire a maid anymore.

[BeContented]

Littlefly:

cwc:

yes....sometimes good to have them around....I do agree, have peace of mind. But in my case, MIL is the one driving my maids crazy and chasing all of them away :skeptical:

Cwc, certainly do not envy the position you are in. Sounds like 'politics' where your MIL is trying (unconsciously?) to assert her influence. Possible to :siam: and let her own the overall marketing/ cooking ?

MIL is working, DIL is SAHM - how? Previously b4 she worked (no maid then), she was complaining BIG time over dunno what to cook, what to buy, whole day comparing and complaining prices and she was driving me crazy too. And when she cooked, she'll just make sure HER SON is catered for, my kids she'll tell me \"you cook what your kids want to eat\" citing my kids picky. Yes to some extend, but come'on, spicy veg, sambal chilli stuff, lady's finger, brinjal etc....can't we have normal green leafy veg? 1 meal 2 cooks....ridiculous. She din want to take over total ownership, either way I'm stuck.
And the moment she realised her other children dun want to come for dinner on weekdays, she immediately drop the cooking and chose to work. So naturally, I took over the cooking. And when FIL got problem, initially refused to let us hire maid (and it's my house and they staying with me loh).... after all cannot take it, we went ahead to hire maid.

Now there's maid, cooking settled. However MIL desire to interfere and setup territories worsening..... I have given up liao. I already dunno what to expect next.....cos' thinking alone already scared me :scared: . My complaints has created trouble to my own marriage.....the only way is to let DH feel the burden himself and that's when he starts to appreciate, realise and willing to take action. It has happened before, I'll just wait :evil:

[Gluttonish]

cwc - cham right? Certain things we can’t talk directly to MIL, and yet can’t correct maid. Maid cham, we also cham.


peapot - yar, i agree there are times where i appreciate PILs being around. There are Pros and Cons, sometimes i just feel like moving far far away. Why don’t you consider changing a maid? I always feel that once the maid starts to show her colours, it can only start to get worse. soooo dangerous if she starts to have boyfriend, what if she brings your DD along to meet the bf? or worse, bring the bf home? e

[BeContented]

Gluttonish:

cwc - cham right? Certain things we can't talk directly to MIL, and yet can't correct maid. Maid cham, we also cham.


peapot - yar, i agree there are times where i appreciate PILs being around. There are Pros and Cons, sometimes i just feel like moving far far away. Why don't you consider changing a maid? I always feel that once the maid starts to show her colours, it can only start to get worse. soooo dangerous if she starts to have boyfriend, what if she brings your DD along to meet the bf? or worse, bring the bf home? e

Hee hee....true....做人真难。While I do believe there are some good maids around, sadly it seems that most get worse once they start showing colors. Guess, it all depends on your own threshold. You can choose to give her a chance, wait & see....but always have a backup plan and be prepared that it'll be a NO-GO eventually. If you are the type that cannot tolerate too much nonsense, then get rid of the tumor early.

[Funx3]

cwc:

Now there's maid, cooking settled. However MIL desire to interfere and setup territories worsening..... I have given up liao. I already dunno what to expect next.....cos' thinking alone already scared me :scared: . My complaints has created trouble to my own marriage.....the only way is to let DH feel the burden himself and that's when he starts to appreciate, realise and willing to take action. It has happened before, I'll just wait :evil:

Wah Your Household Sounds Like the Chinese Drama Shows on TV ....
I Really Empathise with U on Your Dilemma ....

[mama_g]

yo yo yo … monster in law in the house…

[nms1]

Whenever I have interviewed transfer maids you can guarantee that the majority of those coming from local families will say that the reason they want a transfer or the reason for one of their previous transfers is because they cannot handle the grandmother!


I’m lucky in that my m-i-l does interfere but now generally not in anything that bothers me too much so I let it ride. I am still feeling the effects of her past actions on my daughter’s eating habits but that’s another (very long) story.

I think we need to put ourselves in the maid’s shoes sometimes as they really are stuck in the middle.

[Littlefly]

cwc, patz patz. :hugs: Just hope your maid can stay and don't add to your troubles. Login to vent when needed.

[BeContented]

Littlefly:

cwc, patz patz. :hugs: Just hope your maid can stay and don't add to your troubles. Login to vent when needed.

Thanks Littlefly.
Frankly, crossing my fingers.......cos' now FIL seems to be giving trouble too.....and I can see maid getting more and more frustrated. I pity her. She has expressed she wants to continue and work for me, but if things really turn worse, no choice cos' she cannot take it too.
Guess, if that really happens, I'll gladly pack FIL off to nursing home (cos I too cannot accept his inappropriate behaviour) and go maidless again... in any case, I'm happier that way. At most order tingkat again or ta-bao twice a week lah.

Honestly, being able to vent here is a blessing :love: Sometimes, we really have no where to turn to....and also, dun want to let my parents know I'm going thru' such rubbish, makes them sad and then they start feeling angry with DH/PIL, no point adding more :nunchuk:

[Gluttonish]

My maid stays in my in-law’s place most of the time, so they have alot of say in my maid. She was the one who chose this maid in fact, cos all that i shortlisted was rejected by her. Sian. I really hope the maid can remember that i’m her employer, and her priority should be my kids, otherwise it will be machiam like i employ a maid to help them do their house work.


My hubby is the heck care kind, and thinks his mum should be in charge. Even when the agency called and told us to collect the maid, he told me to ask his mum go collect and train her. I guess women like me are more petty by nature, so i die die dun want as I think the maid will seriously think my mil is her employer, not me.

I know I’m petty, but i don’t want to be paying $600+ a month just to be a employer in name.