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    Club SAHM

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Newbies & Clubs
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    • P Offline
      Paulyn
      last edited by

      I really envy SAHMs.


      I stayed hm for almost 2 mths and just returned to wk. Really can’t get used to it but hubby is worried we will be stretched financially.

      But I really can’t concentrate at work. I really don’t know how you guys cope unless your hubbies are earning 5 figure sums. I feel my hubby is already quite well-paid but he is just insecure.

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      • P Offline
        puff
        last edited by

        Paulyn:
        I really envy SAHMs.


        I really don't know how you guys cope unless your hubbies are earning 5 figure sums. I feel my hubby is already quite well-paid but he is just insecure.
        I have been a stay-at-home even before my DD1 is born and my DH is not earning 5 figure sums. The reason I choose to stay at home is coz I feel less stress n happier at home. B'coz of this reason I am willing to live a simple life n renounce materialism. :imanangel:
        We did make a lot of financial adjustment n my DH agree with me that a fulfilling life is more impt than $$ :hugs:

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        • jedamumJ Offline
          jedamum
          last edited by

          Paulyn:
          I really envy SAHMs.


          I stayed hm for almost 2 mths and just returned to wk. Really can't get used to it but hubby is worried we will be stretched financially.

          But I really can't concentrate at work. I really don't know how you guys cope unless your hubbies are earning 5 figure sums. I feel my hubby is already quite well-paid but he is just insecure.
          5 figure sums a month?!! woohoo..in such case we are not SAHMs already....we will be tai-tais already. :lol:
          we tried to spend within means and and because whatever comes in monthly, goes out monthly, we accumulate yearly bonuses as our savings. i only re-look at adding/upgrading enrichment for children only when dh has his yearly increment. for our case, dh feels very secured financially mainly because we do not have the financial burden of taking care of my in-laws. i am the one feeling insecure. :oops:

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          • AdmummyA Offline
            Admummy
            last edited by

            Paulyn:
            I really envy SAHMs.


            I stayed hm for almost 2 mths and just returned to wk. Really can't get used to it but hubby is worried we will be stretched financially.

            But I really can't concentrate at work. I really don't know how you guys cope unless your hubbies are earning 5 figure sums. I feel my hubby is already quite well-paid but he is just insecure.
            Paulyn, SAHM got their woes and stress too...i quit my job to be SAHM recently...sometimes i will look back of my working days and feel \"nostalgia\" about days of shopping during lunch time, social exchanges with colleagues, dressing up nicely to work (miss the high heel shoes, manicure, et)...MC can stay at home to rest (with no kids around)...now i \"work\" 24hrs a day (heheh but still i enjoy every moment of bonding with kids)...

            income alone shld not be the only deciding factor...you should also look into your financial commitments, expenditures and savings...i wld strongly advise you to sit down and work out a spreadsheet on your financial commitment before you make the decision...

            if the hubby earns 5-figure income but have lots of commitments like housing/car loans, insurance, tax, allowances to parents, expenditures etc, the salary may still not meet up with the expenses...in addition, as a precaution, you should also set aside some savings in case the sole-bread winner loses his job....

            from your post, your hubby seems not too \"supportive\" of your decision to be SAHM (due to insecurity), do sit down and have a heart to heart discussion with him... is he facing stress at work? or his job not stable? otherwise, show him \"concrete\" evidence (e.g. spreadsheet on family income/expenditure) to justify that the family can live on his sole income...it is very important to get the hubby's support before you switch to SAHM...just my two cents worth, hope its useful to you...in any case, keep us posted on your decision and good luck!

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            • A Offline
              adnyl711
              last edited by

              Hi mummies,


              I just became a stay at home mom this march '11 after the birth of my second child. Now I’m caring for my children along with a maid and my Hb is not earning 5 figure sum. I do not miss my previous job because there is too much politics and do not really like the company culture even though I was there for close to 4 years. Even though I’m now on duty 24/7 but I really enjoy spending the time with my kids and watching them grow up.
              I guess I dun feel so stressed over money matters becos I still have a sideline which is my interest and allows me to do what I love and earn some pocket money at the same time.
              It also kept me sane and up to date about what’s happening outside.

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              • S Offline
                SAHM_TAN
                last edited by

                My hubby is not earning 5 figure salary. I can be a SAHM because we are debt free. Material wise we live simply. The only big expense is the kids' education including enrichment programmes but we are selective.


                My hubby is supportive of me being a SAHM so we are able to manage expectations.

                Besides financial issues, also need to work out support system. I do not know about other mummies but 1 adult to 3 young kids is very siong for me. So I do expect some help from hubby in the sense that he spend some time with the kids, so that I can breathe a little 😄

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                • S Offline
                  sleepy
                  last edited by

                  Paulyn:
                  I really envy SAHMs.


                  I stayed hm for almost 2 mths and just returned to wk. Really can't get used to it but hubby is worried we will be stretched financially.

                  But I really can't concentrate at work. I really don't know how you guys cope unless your hubbies are earning 5 figure sums. I feel my hubby is already quite well-paid but he is just insecure.
                  Look at nett income - after deducting mandatory expenses, what's the balance? If it's a comfortable balance, then can 'afford' to stay home.

                  Completely understand the insecured part. I'm the one feeling very insecured with a 50% cut in household income. Actually, I still feel insecured now, despites being a SAHM for 8+ years, that's why I hold a very tight rein on our household expenses.

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                  • B Offline
                    BeContented
                    last edited by

                    Hi,

                    Ha ha…5-figure salary will be good…but too bad, not a tai-tai.
                    When I first raised the issue after give birth to 2nd child, DH was not supportive too…back then, we were still paying off loans and needed to support parents as other siblings were still starting to work only.
                    Fast forward 6 years, we managed to clear up bulk of the loans … and only then, DH was more secured and supportive (of course, not just financial reasons, need to coach kids, MIL & Maid issues etc etc). One thing for sure, with me at home, DH became more ‘secured’ as he knows kids are in safe hands, now he goes to work in peace, dun have to whole day call & ask. However, will definitely have to give up some ‘perks’ too. Like what some say, I do miss the time when I can lunch at different places, shopping, go facial etc etc…but I believe, these are just material, can give up. The thing I do miss most is the yearly overseas trip…nowadays, only restrict to cheaper places like Malaysia, Sentosa, Bangkok etc.

                    Basically, before any decision, you need to know your finances. Discuss with DH, with the spreadsheet, things will be clearer and it’s easier to decide. Lastly, are you ready? SAHM is not a bed of roses, not that easy…esp when the financials are tight.

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                    • janet88J Offline
                      janet88
                      last edited by

                      Paulyn:
                      I really envy SAHMs.


                      I stayed hm for almost 2 mths and just returned to wk. Really can't get used to it but hubby is worried we will be stretched financially.

                      But I really can't concentrate at work. I really don't know how you guys cope unless your hubbies are earning 5 figure sums. I feel my hubby is already quite well-paid but he is just insecure.
                      My hubby doesn't earn 5 figure salary...or else my kids can attend tuition classes then I don't have to scream at them to get work done.
                      Hubby feels secure with me at home looking after the kids...he knows they are fed, clean and their school work is attended to daily.
                      Fortunately, we don't have travel bug or the need to watch movies or eat at restaurants.
                      Now that both kids are in school, there is not much time/chance for them to wear pretty clothes. For myself, I don't have to buy make-up, pretty clothes or shoes either. But I believe in being presentable and not look like a frumpy auntie.

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                      • S Offline
                        SAHM_TAN
                        last edited by

                        janet_lee88:
                        Paulyn:

                        I really envy SAHMs.


                        I stayed hm for almost 2 mths and just returned to wk. Really can't get used to it but hubby is worried we will be stretched financially.

                        But I really can't concentrate at work. I really don't know how you guys cope unless your hubbies are earning 5 figure sums. I feel my hubby is already quite well-paid but he is just insecure.

                        My hubby doesn't earn 5 figure salary...or else my kids can attend tuition classes then I don't have to scream at them to get work done.
                        Hubby feels secure with me at home looking after the kids...he knows they are fed, clean and their school work is attended to daily.
                        Fortunately, we don't have travel bug or the need to watch movies or eat at restaurants.
                        Now that both kids are in school, there is not much time/chance for them to wear pretty clothes. For myself, I don't have to buy make-up, pretty clothes or shoes either. But I believe in being presentable and not look like a frumpy auntie.

                        Since arrival of no. 3 10 months ago, I've been living in T-shirt and bermudas/shorts :rotflmao: I wave the white flag liao :lol:

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