Do you cane your daughters when they misbehave?

[HAPPYH]

Imami:

Oh gosh, dont do it anymore lah.... so dangerous on your knuckles. how about smack the thighs? Their hands will move away to cover the thighs and then you can move in on the bum! *evil*


aiya... so bad of me (to think of ideas for you so that you dont end up canning your own knuckles).

I was reading some of the posts loudly and my DD said you are evil.

[HAPPYH]

:rotflmao:

puff:

For my 2 yrs old DD , I tried both time-out n caning ... This is wat happened when she took too long to finish her milk..

Me: Finish your milk now :mad:
Dd: no
Me: now go stand at the corner
Dd (crying n rolling on the floor): NOooooooo .... Noooooo
:mad: :mad: :mad:

After intro her to Mr Cane....
Me: finish your milk now
Dd: no
Me (put the cane on the table n stare at dd)
Dd ( finish her milk instantly)
:rahrah: :rahrah: :rahrah:

[HAPPYH]

Imami:

I was hardly smacked / slapped / caned by my parents when I was a child. I only remembered being whipped by a belt once by my father from lying. One whip was enough... The metal buckle was power, where it landed, you could see the blood clotting.


But interestingly, I was caned A LOT by my elder brother (who was 10 years my senior). Whenever my parents were out during the night, I sure ended up being a zebra. Ask me what \"crime\" earn me my stripes? I dunno.... I just felt that he was only venting his frustration on me.

Now that I am a mum, I don't cane my child. I am always amused whenever i see the curious look on my child's face when he meets mr cane. I guess he must be one of the very few kids who doesnt recognize the power if mr cane. I don't use the cane (or any other weapon) for fear that it's too harse on my child. We sometimes forget to control, you know, and may end up hurting the child. So I use my hand. If I feel the pain, he would feel even more pain.

But after reading what Bud said, I will think about it. No, I won't switch to cane - no weapon for me. But I need to think of how to balance the idea of \"hands are for sayang\" and smacking.

But in the short run, I don't think I can stop smacking totally. Once n a while, a smack is still a very power disciplinary tool.

I also smack my DD on her thighs or bum. I dont use/have a cane.

But I choose one place (thigh or bum) at a time. That's why my DD felt you are evil as you suggested to alternate between these two. May be now she will think I am better than some of the mummies here

My DD cries after I smack her but within few minutes, she will be ok. That is one good thing with her. Then my guilty feeling / heart pain will go off.

[Imami]

HAPPYH:

Imami:

Oh gosh, dont do it anymore lah.... so dangerous on your knuckles. how about smack the thighs? Their hands will move away to cover the thighs and then you can move in on the bum! *evil*


aiya... so bad of me (to think of ideas for you so that you dont end up canning your own knuckles).

I was reading some of the posts loudly and my DD said you are evil.

Hahaha I was \"working against the kids\" with the above posts. I was just trying to \"protect concern2's knuckles\". Can't really ask her to stop caning... When one decides to cane, there is no return already... 箭一离弓必射出去。

I believe kids will learn to be more flexible when you show them the same thing can happen using different methods. Like the smack end anywhere, not just the bum.

[HAPPYH]

Imami:

HAPPYH:

[quote=\"Imami\"]Oh gosh, dont do it anymore lah.... so dangerous on your knuckles. how about smack the thighs? Their hands will move away to cover the thighs and then you can move in on the bum! *evil*


aiya... so bad of me (to think of ideas for you so that you dont end up canning your own knuckles).

I was reading some of the posts loudly and my DD said you are evil.

Hahaha I was \"working against the kids\" with the above posts. I was just trying to \"protect concern2's knuckles\". Can't really ask her to stop caning... When one decides to cane, there is no return already... 箭一离弓必射出去。

I believe kids will learn to be more flexible when you show them the same thing can happen using different methods. Like the smack end anywhere, not just the bum.[/quote]Hahaha.....

[shopaholic]

Yes, I do cane them occasionally (about 2+ yo?) when they get out of hand. Sometimes, just by taking the cane out and wave at them, they will be scared already.Now, my girls (already in primary school now) behave well. Now the cane is \"reserved\" for my 2+ yo boy. :evil:

[osim]

Never had too. She has been a very sweet child.

[SBKS]

actually everything in moderation to remind everyone. whether you use cane or spatula or hand or whatever to carry out the punishment, hard or soft approach, everything is in moderation.


approach must varies and must change accordingly to age and situation.

imo, caning is during 2yo to 6yo. anything beyond that i believe its of no use. another approach must be used. caning are more for younger kids (2-4)where they do not really understand fully your rationale or reason for not allowing them to do certain things. kids (4-6) needed cane to remind them of how powerful Mr cane is.

So i would say caning is best used during this period. But again using it too frequently during this period will render it useless. Use it for correctional behaviour, not performance like the 8 tips in the earlier pages.

and must be creative on the use of cane. I verbalise the usage as 1st warning, 2nd warning wave it ard, 3rd warning hit the cane on the wall, 4th warning hit it near them. 5th warning is hit on them.

something to the extend. my 1cent.

BTW, what canes do those who used it buy? There are a few types and those common wooden ones seem to be easily broken. I whack on wall for 3rd warning and it split into 2 vertically or horizontally. damage before i could even go to 5th warning. or shall we use plastic cane? or balloon stick?

[MMM]

Our cane would sometimes go MIA. When that happens, I would offer a reward :evil: to the person who finds it. Most of the time, someone will find it. So it goes to show that they are the ones who hid the cane.


This doesn't work anymore except for my youngest dd (p1). She is always keen to help me find the cane.

Girls and boy will get it. Mostly use to scare them when they are talking non-stop when they should be studying, etc... But we do cane them when they do the wrong thing... Eg. son got complained by ft for playing paper aeroplane during class time :mad: . He got caned on his hands 2-3 times. Usually reserve the cane for the \"most severe\" punishment.

[KSP]

Just a general question for everyone.


When do you stop caning your child?