All About Autism
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slmkhoo:
You can't have a starker contrast than between my 2 girls. My ASD girl has a lot of the usual issues - social, co-ordination, focus, organisational etc - which has taken a lot of my time and effort, and still does even though things have improved a lot now that she is 15yo. My younger NT girl is very social, above average in a lot of non-academic skills (music, sports, art, life skills), and very strong academically, all with hardly any pushing or coaching. I often feel like I have a split personality dealing with such different kids.[/quote]
with my first son like this, i am struggling to consider a 2nd kid. i dont know if it's genetic. what if it turns out wrong again? that's the biggest fear i have. i know i need to have confidence in my son, but i am just prepared for the worst.Double E:
[quote=\"ImMeeMee\"]I was chatting with my colleague today and she was sharing about how frustrating it is to teach his son write his Chinese name. She described that it was difficult because the chinese characters are difficult to write and he keeps using the wrong strokes.
I have nothing against my colleague since she does not know anything about my special needs child and is probably lamenting casually about the kids which we all do. But I couldnt help spending a somber moment thinking silently that she doesnt understand the true meaning of frustration until she gets to teach a special needs child.
No offence to mothers of NT kids, but its moments like these that render a pensive mood.
Indeed, that's why I go easy with my NT girl, as long as her development milestones are met, I let her be and do things she likes like coloring, scribbling. The time spent coaching my boy is frustrating enough. -
Blokus:
thanks for information, blokus.Immeemee
I suddenly recall some methods you can use to interest your girl to write. You can get her to trace letters on sand or rice. Pour some sand/rice or anything grainy (or something foam-y like shaving cream etc) on a tray and get her to trace her letters. This is actually a well known method used by montessori. But it may get messy or she may end up fiddling with the grains.
I also remembered I used the doodle board app on my iPhone- and still do for Chinese words, and let my boy Practice his writing rather than using pen & paper. I also downloaded a couple of tracing apps for him. The point is, make it as interesting as possible. I think sitting down writing with pen & paper may be a tad dull even for NT kids.
I dunno. Just some suggestions
I have seen montessori materials of alphabet where the letters are imprinted on cardboard with sand-paper-like texture with the objective to get the child to trace and get their strokes right.
actually my daughter's key issues on handwriting are her grip and the strength, and these are already killers without going into strokes. thanks for the tips, will see whether can try out the few things including the app.
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helplessmum3:
helplessmum, dont be so hard on yourself. Whatever has happened has happened. I'm sure you have read enough to know that there is currently still no known cause for ASD.ImMeeMee:
[quote=\"helplessmum3\"]Mummies ,
Do u know \"Baby plus\"?
I use this while I'm pregnant w my son. Maybe this cause him ASD
thanks, can't help it, this thought keep haunting me... :([/quote]Leave the past behind, we can't change a thing. blame game doesn't work but adds to negativity and affects our mood. we need to be strong, no, stronger for our dears. they need us. instead of spending time reflecting whats gone wrong, spend every sec reading up articles /book and playing with them. Cheers up! Future will be brighter. when you have the down moment, talk to your hubby, or best friend or someone who can give you that positive energy.
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mashy:
Teachers are the reason why i am sending my son so far away from my house as i trust them. only 3rd day in morning playgroup, i didnt' have much expectation. but i didn't tell teachers his problems. teacher just said he's spoiled but at least he sometimes can follow instruction, although he's still running around in the classroom. i just would want honest feedback.
Then the teachers just have to find activities for him to do! Some kids stop their naps earlier than others. It's their jobs to manage them. My boy also stopped napping very early.helplessmum3:
me too.. i start to defends when pp complaint about weird persons.
Mummies.
school these days keep complaining my son during nap time he is very active, what should i do? i also duno why my son recently start to be very active?
books & cards & sequence pixs does not help my son. he don't understand.
hiaz.. parents w special kids always at losing end when teachers complaints....
Sometimes u need to ignore these teachers. What can u do when u are not even there? Are u to solve their problems? -
Fizz:
fizz, we all go through that stage. Now that things are settled, its never too late to support the child with all that we have.
Somehow, the official diagnosis puts an end to answers which we have been searching for a long time. We initially sent him on suspicion of ADHD, but it was proven not instead. For the longest time, I felt like an incompetent parent. My IL repeatedly commented that my SIL (her daughter) could discipline her daughters very well while my boy was so hyper, climbing and jumping, and seldom obeying instructions. Even now, she felt that my boy must have been scared badlly during infant time and hence he had autism. Even my dad said that he was not obedient because we spoilt him rotten. Some friends would insist that a kid could be disciplined as long as the parent was strict and consistent enough. I was forever questioning myself, am I too indulgent?...am I not strict enough?...is there something wrong with my teaching? But when I compared my gal to other kids, I did not think so. But others will always look at my boy and make these comments. At least with this, I can guide him along knowing the direction.
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Karkar:
karkar, patience prevails. I have taken many months to do many things with my girl, and there are things which have not been set right yet.
Cheers to ImMeeMee. No one could ever imagine the effort we need to improve even a small thing on our kid. after months, i still couldnt get my son to drink from the straw bottle or sippy cup. so in playgourp, he's the only one who couldn't drink water without feeding. headache. -
Karkar:
Teachers are the reason why i am sending my son so far away from my house as i trust them. only 3rd day in morning playgroup, i didnt' have much expectation. but i didn't tell teachers his problems. teacher just said he's spoiled but at least he sometimes can follow instruction, although he's still running around in the classroom. i just would want honest feedback.[/quote]Agree! Quality and patient teachers are so important to their developments. Don't need those who are just there to collect paycheck.
Then the teachers just have to find activities for him to do! Some kids stop their naps earlier than others. It's their jobs to manage them. My boy also stopped napping very early.mashy:
[quote=\"helplessmum3\"]me too.. i start to defends when pp complaint about weird persons.
Mummies.
school these days keep complaining my son during nap time he is very active, what should i do? i also duno why my son recently start to be very active?
books & cards & sequence pixs does not help my son. he don't understand.
hiaz.. parents w special kids always at losing end when teachers complaints....
Sometimes u need to ignore these teachers. What can u do when u are not even there? Are u to solve their problems? -
ImMeeMee:
Try putting sweet drinks/coke in the straw bottle. With motivation, u will be amazed at how fast and proficient they suddenly become.
karkar, patience prevails. I have taken many months to do many things with my girl, and there are things which have not been set right yet.Karkar:
Cheers to ImMeeMee. No one could ever imagine the effort we need to improve even a small thing on our kid. after months, i still couldnt get my son to drink from the straw bottle or sippy cup. so in playgourp, he's the only one who couldn't drink water without feeding. headache.
Think my son picked up the skill when he tried to share our bottled drinks. -
I have a sinking feeling. Why is KKH confirming kids so late? i know confirmation is a confirmation, it gives parents more direction from the assessment on which areas to improve.
recently chanced upon a Taiwanese website http://www.autismawakening.org/, the owner sets a very good example. i bought her book. maybe you can find it useful to under the education of your kids without being fooled by lot of service providers. the best gift to your kid is your involvement in their intervention, you are their hope. Salute to the mummies here, who nvr give up. -
ImMeeMee and Mashy, thanks for the tips. maybe from very young, we didnt’ allow him to suck on his fingers much, he didnt have a habit of putting everything into his mouth. now i think we have overdone. that’s the sensory sensitive period that we missed.
I tried putting honey/sweet stuff on the straw. whenever it’s put in front of him, not even close to his mouth, he turns his head away and refuses to let it get close without a cry. I dont want to force him as he will only remember drinking water is bad. inlaws used to feed him water spoon by spoon, now hes able to drink from a cup with us holding the cup of course, else he would turn the cup upside down like every ohter bottle with opening.
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