All About Autism

[Karkar]

Double E:

Kar Kar

So eventually, you got the private centre to diagnose your son? I thought u mentioned that it is an assessment, so now is a full diagnosis? Like other mummies, I am also quite surprised that the centre will conduct the diagnosis on your son when he is not even 2. All the psychologists that we went to did not recommend to diagnose my boy until he is after 3. Even now, the KKH doc also didn't think it is necessary to put a label on him until he is 5 and time to take the school assessment test.

Or, is it because u insisted a full diagnosis from the centre? Do note that since you have diagnose him so young, he may need to do another one when he is 5/6.
And how much did you pay for the full diagnosis?

initially its for the psychologist to draft out the initial plan, i went for private for their emphasis on planning and evaluation, not too much on diagnosis.

the formal term they use is full evaluation, when i asked my case manager whether its with diagnosis, she said yes. the psychologist almost confirmed him verbally when she heard my son do echolalia by sayin 1-10 and ABC song. mummies, not to worry, after that night, i thought it through what psychologist said during 3-hr observation, i realized that she's not right in everything. i am waiting for report and see the content of it.

in fact, what i struggle in right now is not how i can apply ABA at home, but how i can connect with him and get close to him. How to play with him and make him happy is something i keep on thinking. if our bonding is not strong, how do I expect my son to learn from me? i chose home therapy programme so that i can generalize the learning at home and outside. now i am still waiting for the centre to provide me with their plan.

Double E, as for the fee, i paid 950, but i am yet to receive their report.

[Karkar]

mashy:

I don't quite understand the reason behind stopping the music. My NT gal also sings. Why does it need to mean anything? She repeats songs from memory, recite di zi GUI which I read to her from young. She's now singing gangnam style!

that's why i wont follow all that Psychologist suggests. I will take what i think it's right. if i stop the songs, stop reading books, i am running out of resources to get to him. when i sing and read, he looks at me and waits for me to say the next line/word, but if he can, he would say it. that's wonderful.

[Karkar]

ImMeeMee:

Kar kar, my heart goes out to you.


With this confirmation, it is likely that everyone in the family goes into activated mode n start to press buttons. All focus will be on your child on what is being done n what else can be done. It will be eat sleep breathe the condition.

But just bear in mind to also take care of one more person, and that is yourself. The impact on the mummy is the greatest (at least for me) and it will be equally tough on you. Just hang in there.

ImMeeMee, thank you so much.
All mummies, thanks for all your comments. no worries no criticism. each post gets me to think. it's good to hear different perspectives.

I learn that fighting with autism is a long battle, every mummy/daddy needs to be consistent in caring for their lovely child. i will take care of myself. In the past 2 months, i have not been wearing makeup to work, i have not been going to facial, i have not been using skin products and doing masks, i have not been going out for a drink except to welcome my london gf. my active life style has been changed, and i am happy that i can make that sacrifice for my dear son and i am not sad about losing those vibrant life.. (I couldn't even imagine myself baby sit a child before pregnancy)..i grew up to be a responsible mother, i am proud of myself and i am proud of the gift god sent - my son. He's a lovely and happy kid. mum here needs extra kick to get to his heart and touch his soul i wont give up

[Karkar]

I feel you, helplessmum3. cheers up, rainbow after the storm will be right at the corner. I feel sorry about your husband’s situation. I feel you for being the only one who works to support family. my family is slightly better but i am living with inlaws when my hubby works overseas. there’s no immediate chance for him to come back to sg yet. I am alone to deal with this together with my inlaws. my parents are not living in SG. thinking of getting them to come for easier communication. I need to work to support family and future expensive therapy session, I need to read up books on ABA, VB, RDI, TEACCH etc to better assess therapist and what’s needed for my son, and learn the skills to play with my son,(i am not a mother with baby instinct), need to convince and teach inlaws what to do, constantly explain to them why this why that but still not being followed. the pressure on our women is simply enormous. but we need to be strong.


can we now get the subsidy of 300 per month even if we engage other private centres not in their CEL list?

[Double E]

Kar kar and Helplessmum, it must be very hard on both of u to deal with this situation alone. Stay strong.

[helplessmum3]

For CEL sub, yr son need to refer by kkh

[helplessmum3]

karkar u sure can…


i only work w my son after work after i fetch him from school at 6, 7 bath, 8dinner so 9-10pm i work w him. If i have evening class, i did not work w him.

i give up HBP by kKH therapists because. too much of hassle,imagine, i have to send my son to cc in the morning by bus and go work by bus…
at 3pm i take bus from office to my son cc then bring him to HBP by… then from HBP i take bus home… all these journey i have to carry my bag & my son school bag at time my son wan me to carry… he is still weak on his upper truck , tat y he can easier get tired.
on top of this, i have to apply half day leave…

Of all these my son only see HBP therapist only 1hr , not work w my son but ases, u see not really cost effective or rational.

[ImMeeMee]

Karkar:

ImMeeMee, thank you so much.

All mummies, thanks for all your comments. no worries no criticism. each post gets me to think. it's good to hear different perspectives.

I learn that fighting with autism is a long battle, every mummy/daddy needs to be consistent in caring for their lovely child. i will take care of myself. In the past 2 months, i have not been wearing makeup to work, i have not been going to facial, i have not been using skin products and doing masks, i have not been going out for a drink except to welcome my london gf. my active life style has been changed, and i am happy that i can make that sacrifice for my dear son and i am not sad about losing those vibrant life.. (I couldn't even imagine myself baby sit a child before pregnancy)..i grew up to be a responsible mother, i am proud of myself and i am proud of the gift god sent - my son. He's a lovely and happy kid. mum here needs extra kick to get to his heart and touch his soul i wont give up

kar kar, I was (and still am) never good with kids. So there are times when I think that maybe there is a reason that life has sent me a very tough nut to crack. If I dont learn it, it will just return in different forms until I master it. Its a learning process for us mummies as well.

You know, I used to think of autism as my enemy, but now I am beginning to think of it as my partner. Rather than to fight it, lets engage and live along side with it.

Good to see that you are taking it in stride. Its a marathon, not a sprint, so do conserve energy.

[mashy]

ImMeeMee:

Karkar:

ImMeeMee, thank you so much.

All mummies, thanks for all your comments. no worries no criticism. each post gets me to think. it's good to hear different perspectives.

I learn that fighting with autism is a long battle, every mummy/daddy needs to be consistent in caring for their lovely child. i will take care of myself. In the past 2 months, i have not been wearing makeup to work, i have not been going to facial, i have not been using skin products and doing masks, i have not been going out for a drink except to welcome my london gf. my active life style has been changed, and i am happy that i can make that sacrifice for my dear son and i am not sad about losing those vibrant life.. (I couldn't even imagine myself baby sit a child before pregnancy)..i grew up to be a responsible mother, i am proud of myself and i am proud of the gift god sent - my son. He's a lovely and happy kid. mum here needs extra kick to get to his heart and touch his soul i wont give up

kar kar, I was (and still am) never good with kids. So there are times when I think that maybe there is a reason that life has sent me a very tough nut to crack. If I dont learn it, it will just return in different forms until I master it. Its a learning process for us mummies as well.

You know, I used to think of autism as my enemy, but now I am beginning to think of it as my partner. Rather than to fight it, lets engage and live along side with it.


Good to see that you are taking it in stride. Its a marathon, not a sprint, so do conserve energy.

There are advantages to being an autistic actually. They are innocent, no hidden agenda, not manipulative. I've seen so many manipulative kids around it scares me. They are also very polite children if you just teach them the words to say. The easiest way to manage them is just to adhere to a routine. No need to guess what's next. They have great memory and can tell you exactly what you have said long ago. They are easy to please and demand nothing from you. They don't bother you when you are busy doing something else. The bad thing of course is that you may forget about him.

[Blokus]

mashy:

There are advantages to being an autistic actually. They are innocent, no hidden agenda, not manipulative. I've seen so many manipulative kids around it scares me. They are also very polite children if you just teach them the words to say. The easiest way to manage them is just to adhere to a routine. No need to guess what's next. They have great memory and can tell you exactly what you have said long ago. They are easy to please and demand nothing from you. They don't bother you when you are busy doing something else. The bad thing of course is that you may forget about him.

Agree. My son is quite an angel. Say he wants to go a playground, we say no. He rarely gets upsets even so he never throws up a tantrum. He just cries & get over it in a few minutes. Yet he's 1 year old sister is already throwing her temper around! The other day I showed him a photo of a disabled child, I asked what's wrong with the child. He couldn't tell at all. He doesn't discriminate or give a weird gaze at anyone who looks different. Everyone's the same to him! :imanangel: