Club SAHM

[Happymoon]

Dear Buds, thk u for sharing. I think your two girls are having loads of fun!! Do other SAHP plan for outdoor activities on a daily basis? My English neighbours bring their kids out many times a day (swim, playground, park etc).

[Blobbi]

Happymoon:

Dear Buds, thk u for sharing. I think your two girls are having loads of fun!! Do other SAHP plan for outdoor activities on a daily basis? My English neighbours bring their kids out many times a day (swim, playground, park etc).

Hi Happymoon, weekends, my son is out swimming, mostly, with daddy (so I can avoid getting wet) . During the weekdays, we do a lot of scooting and cycling or we just go to the playground. He's so dark, his schoolmates think he's Indian, lol!

[sleepy]

Happymoon:

SAHM wannabe here. Can I find out from more experienced SAHP if I should have a timetable everyday for DS who is 5? Can share wif me how you spend weekdays wif ur children?

My dd has no fixed timetable. In the morning she goes kindy. In the afternoon, after her favourite tv programme hi-5, I will sit with her to do some written work for an hour or two. The rest of the time is free play, doing art & craft, reading, play piano or toys.

I'm an indoor person, hardly bring her to outdoor playground, swimming or cycling. I bring her to movies though. Outdoor activities in charge by dh

Is your boy attending any enrichments?

[Happymoon]

My dd has no fixed timetable. In the morning she goes kindy. In the afternoon, after her favourite tv programme hi-5, I will sit with her to do some written work for an hour or two. The rest of the time is free play, doing art & craft, reading, play piano or toys.


I’m an indoor person, hardly bring her to outdoor playground, swimming or cycling. I bring her to movies though. Outdoor activities in charge by dh

Is your boy attending any enrichments?[/quote]

Took my boy out fr CCC & enrol in K2 next yr since I’ve just resigned to be SAHM. He’s not attending any enrichment yet. Will sign him up for extra Chinese cos he’s really BAD at it (refuse to speak in Mandarin at all). Thinking of music lessons perhaps but a colleague told me the drop out rate for boys quite high at Yamaha. Anyone care to share about music lessons for their children?

[flim]

Happymoon:

Took my boy out fr CCC & enrol in K2 next yr since I've just resigned to be SAHM. He's not attending any enrichment yet. Will sign him up for extra Chinese cos he's really BAD at it (refuse to speak in Mandarin at all). Thinking of music lessons perhaps but a colleague told me the drop out rate for boys quite high at Yamaha. Anyone care to share about music lessons for their children?

hi happymoon,

i learnt music in yamaha when i was young (that's eons ago, of course) and i loved it! i started playing the electone. it was in a group setting, so we played ensemble as well as individually. it was a lot of fun. the teacher was good too. but my happiness didn't last very long.

my parents thought i was talented so they promptly enrolled me to a private lesson with a tutor. i was totally put off by that experience and my interest in music soon disappeared. what makes matters worse was, my parents specifically told me not to tell my yamaha teacher about these private lessons for fear that she'd be unhappy about it. but being young and naive, i felt like i was betraying my yamaha teacher and from then on, our relationship became very awkward. i didn't enjoy any of the music lessons anymore.

thankfully my parents realized this and stopped my private lessons. but damage had already been done and i never felt the same way about music anymore. now music felt like a pressure. it felt like something i had to excel in, not something i get to simply enjoy.

so now, everytime someone mentioned 'music lessons' to me, i always make it a point to share this experience so the same thing won't happen to their children.

i think it's easy to build up our expectations once our children perform well in something, even for one lucky moment. but we need to always remember that first of all, the children need to enjoy it.

[Blobbi]

flim:

hi happymoon,

i learnt music in yamaha when i was young (that's eons ago, of course) and i loved it! i started playing the electone. it was in a group setting, so we played ensemble as well as individually. it was a lot of fun. the teacher was good too. but my happiness didn't last very long.

my parents thought i was talented so they promptly enrolled me to a private lesson with a tutor. i was totally put off by that experience and my interest in music soon disappeared. what makes matters worse was, my parents specifically told me not to tell my yamaha teacher about these private lessons for fear that she'd be unhappy about it. but being young and naive, i felt like i was betraying my yamaha teacher and from then on, our relationship became very awkward. i didn't enjoy any of the music lessons anymore.

thankfully my parents realized this and stopped my private lessons. but damage had already been done and i never felt the same way about music anymore. now music felt like a pressure. it felt like something i had to excel in, not something i get to simply enjoy.

so now, everytime someone mentioned 'music lessons' to me, i always make it a point to share this experience so the same thing won't happen to their children.

i think it's easy to build up our expectations once our children perform well in something, even for one lucky moment. but we need to always remember that first of all, the children need to enjoy it.

Hi flim, tks for this heartfelt post. It's so true - children's interests can be so fleeting, especially if the parent takes it upon themselves to \"set the direction\".

I wish I knew of a way around this, but this is the ultimate parenting dilemma. Now that I'm a parent, I want the best for my child, and if I see that he excels in an area, I would like to help and encourage him. Trouble is, how much parental interference is too much? Maybe the best thing to do is to keep the communication channels open so that if I make an error like that, my child can tell me and we can reverse the actions.

[Happymoon]

Dear flim, thks for sharing ur experience. I rememeber a JC classmate once told me she hated piano lessons so much that she refused to touch it since she completed her formal lessons. I just want my DS to enjoy music & other stuff (art forms, sports etc) without thinking that its a chore/suffering :!: Looks like there's a lot of balancing work to do for parents

[autumnbronze]

Blobbi:

blurqueen:

Spoke to many BTDT (been there done that) parents, they'll tell me that even in Sec sch, the kids need us to be around at least few hours in the day after they're back from school. No parent at home means they've no control and too much freedom, then juvenile issues starts.

*Crash*. There goes my hope of some personal me time (and more personal $$) from next year. But you are saying this will be the case for the next 10 years ...

The other day, I met a mum who quit her job to be full time driver to her son. Seems there are a lot of school bullies on the bus and that's where a lot of bad words, ideas etc can be picked up. Eventually, the kids will learn it anyway, but later rather than sooner cos hopefully, they'll be less vulnerable. She said her 9yo kid heard so much sexual innuendo etc, and she's so glad that she's at home for him to talk to and seek guidance from, rather than let him stew over it at home alone and then maybe decide not to say anything to her later, if she had her working hours.

Hi Blobbi,

You've been nominated for the CREATIVE nick/avatar. CAn you pls provide a short write-up as to why/how you chose the nick/avatar, in that thread. Thx!!!

[autumnbronze]

blurqueen:

Happymoon:

Thks, kiasimom. Was feeling kinda guilty cos my DS plays whole day (during hols) while my colleague sends her 6 yr old DD to 6 different enrichment classes (hols or not) each wk. Wondering if I'm not kiasu enough.

What is wrong with a child playing all day? Being a child, he/she is entitled to play and play and play! What's a childhood without play?

DS1 plays all day too even at P1. He only goes for a Chinese tuition since we're a English speaking family. My neighbor is like your colleague and the drilling started since birth (no kidding!). I too wonder if I needed to be more kiasu? End of the day, both boys got similar results and streamed to the same class in school. 1 boy studied all day, one played all day.

Just ensure the child's play has at least some sort of learning process. I don't encourage too much media games. Still prefer the \"do it yourself\" types which DS invents himself to play with his bro. Since they were 3, I let them have a rather free hand on cutting (yes, even handling childproof scissors), sticking, using everything they get their hands on (with permission of course). They have loads of fun making their own toys!

Hi blurqueen,

You've been nominated for the CREATIVE nick/avatar. Can you pls provide a write-up as to how/why you chose the nick/avatar in that thread thanks.

[flim]

Blobbi:

Hi flim, tks for this heartfelt post. It's so true - children's interests can be so fleeting, especially if the parent takes it upon themselves to \"set the direction\".

I wish I knew of a way around this, but this is the ultimate parenting dilemma. Now that I'm a parent, I want the best for my child, and if I see that he excels in an area, I would like to help and encourage him. Trouble is, how much parental interference is too much? Maybe the best thing to do is to keep the communication channels open so that if I make an error like that, my child can tell me and we can reverse the actions.

hi blobbi,

yea you're absolutely right. an open communication will definitely help. my parents and i weren't very open with each other. as a parent now, i try to encourage my daughter to be open to me by being a good listener and by sharing my own feelings to her.

the thing about it is, at least from personal experience with my daughter, sometimes the children can be pretty inconsistent. i asked my daughter the other day if she wanted to learn drawing. she said she didn't want to. after much persuasion, she agreed to give it a go for one lesson. now, she says she wants to go there everyday! haha...

being a parent is really tricky...