All About Autism
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nugget:
nugget, :hugs:ImMeeMee,
I might be scheduled for overseas trip. I trying very hard to push. I dunno how my hb will manage without me at home. But no choice, we cannot go on single income, we need dual income to sustain.
We both have 3 kids, really really challenging.
When I was working FT, I had to do intensive traveling too. Averaged out, it was about once every 1 to 2 months.
Back then, it was during the period when I was still coming to term with her diagnosis. I recall a lot of times where I hid in the hotel room and cried my heart out in the middle of the night. To manage, I always took the last possible flight in and the first possible flight out. While other colleagues stayed back after official meetings to sight see or shop, I would put myself on the first flight out, sometimes mid night flights as well.
Home front, my dh was able to cope well, but the various therapy sessions took a toil as he is also keeping a FT job. So in the end I decided that PT was the way cos it allowed me to step down from my portfolio and drop the traveling.
Sorry i dont have advice for you here, and hope I am not scaring you on your impending trips. Just wanted to share I know how you feel in terms of the apprehension and the worry.
Conversely, I am the one that is worried that I wont be able to cope when my dh starts traveling, as we would have other issues to worry about ... :sad: -
slmkhoo:
slmkhoo, you really have come a long way, while we mummies of relatively young kids are still struggling with the same issues that you have dealt with long ago.I can imagine how you feel. When my Aspie girl was 4yo and my other girl 2yo, I was also taking a course with my husband. We were overseas with no family or home help, with lectures and homework to do. At that time, we were realising that there were issues with the older girl, but we were taking the one-thing-at-a-time behavioural route and doing things DIY. I feel I spent that year watching the clock too! I think you will get into the rhythm eventually, and at least there will be breaks when the school holidays come round. Try to get the older ones to be as independent as possible.
For the various things the therapists and teachers are asking you to do, make a list and prioritise. Trying to tackle too many at once is too taxing to both you and your child. Do one thing until you are over the 'hump' and your child is coping better before adding something else. Tell the teachers/therapists what your plan of action is, and tell them you will get to each item eventually. I think they will understand if you explain.
yes, its a new work year so still adapting and finding optimal approach. I am quite optimistic that the logistics and to-do-lists will work out as long as we prioritize and moderate expectations. -
i feel tat i use this to cause my son like this
http://www.babyplus.com/ -
ImMeeMee,
Lucky for me, my boss have been very understanding. I have so far escape travelling 2-3 times already cos of my son's first diagnosis, then I became pregnant etc. This time is to travel for training and meetings. Boss told me that I will travel no more than 2x per year.
However, that 2x per year I am also very unwilling. I think I will be like what you say, last flight to fly in, first flight to fly home. Not only I worry abt my ASD boy, I am also worry about the 2 younger ones esp the infant. *hope i can escape this time round too*.
You have given up a lot of your kids. That's the guilt I am talking about. mummies giving up their career for the children, I can't do it. I feel that I am short-changing my children sometimes. Sigh... Without me working, I cannot engage pte therapy and buy good food and materials for him and his siblings. If I am not working, we will probably be doing okay, but budget gonna be super super tight and stressful. Fortunately, I no need to OT. So everyday can knock off on time.
slmkhoo,
You have really share a lot with us and have indeed come a long way. I cannot imagine during your time when your dd was young, with such little information. how you manage to pull through. Really salute you. :udawoman: -
Hello,
I wanted to stop by and let parents know about a speech/communication therapy program that I’ve seen be very effective with my friend’s son. He was suspected of autism,and they have someone come work with him in their home. They work in the Klang Valley. Let me know if anyone is wanting more info, I can pass it to you. -
slmkhoo:
thanks slmkhoo.
If this is to blame, they would have been sued and gone out of business. If it helps you to blame something, go ahead. But the research shows that it's inborn, in the genes. Once the embryo is formed, the genetic material is already fixed. Just accept that every kid is different, some more different than others.helplessmum3:
i feel tat i use this to cause my son like this
http://www.babyplus.com/
Imeemee earlier has told me that already just tat this keep buzzing me. hiaz..
ok understand now. thanks GodMum hee -
helplessmum3:
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nugget:
nugget, its natural to have internal struggles of some sort. I have them very often too.ImMeeMee,
Lucky for me, my boss have been very understanding. I have so far escape travelling 2-3 times already cos of my son's first diagnosis, then I became pregnant etc. This time is to travel for training and meetings. Boss told me that I will travel no more than 2x per year.
However, that 2x per year I am also very unwilling. I think I will be like what you say, last flight to fly in, first flight to fly home. Not only I worry abt my ASD boy, I am also worry about the 2 younger ones esp the infant. *hope i can escape this time round too*.
You have given up a lot of your kids. That's the guilt I am talking about. mummies giving up their career for the children, I can't do it. I feel that I am short-changing my children sometimes. Sigh... Without me working, I cannot engage pte therapy and buy good food and materials for him and his siblings. If I am not working, we will probably be doing okay, but budget gonna be super super tight and stressful. Fortunately, I no need to OT. So everyday can knock off on time.
When I was doing FT, my bosses were understanding and kind enough to let me sort out some work-from-home arrangements, so that I could spend more time at home. I am thankful for the arrangements, although I ended up still very stretched.
I dont know about the nature of your work, but maybe some alternative arrangements like this will help for a start if possible. But if the internal struggles prevail, then maybe it could be a sign that your priorities are shifting and you need to relook at them.
Its a life long thingy, so give yourself some time. It took me more than 6 months to about 1 year from the time I decided to take PT, to negotiating with bosses, to making real arrangements, to going officially to PT. -
ImMeeMee:
ImMeeMee,
nugget, its natural to have internal struggles of some sort. I have them very often too.
When I was doing FT, my bosses were understanding and kind enough to let me sort out some work-from-home arrangements, so that I could spend more time at home. I am thankful for the arrangements, although I ended up still very stretched.
I dont know about the nature of your work, but maybe some alternative arrangements like this will help for a start if possible. But if the internal struggles prevail, then maybe it could be a sign that your priorities are shifting and you need to relook at them.
Its a life long thingy, so give yourself some time. It took me more than 6 months to about 1 year from the time I decided to take PT, to negotiating with bosses, to making real arrangements, to going officially to PT.
Thanks for your advice. I guess I am still getting to use be a mother of 3 kids. I need to adjust to this new lifestyle too.
Yes thankfully for me, I can work from home on and off, otherwise it will be chaotic for me already.
Working part time sounds good. I guess as long as we are working full time, we will definitely feel guilt towards the child. Its challenging to strike a balance. -
Can I ask if your kids have potty challenges?
My son lately dunno why keep staining his underwear. Yesterday even worse, poo in his underwear. He was very clean for a while and manages to go potty himself. Now dunno why starts staining / pooing in his pants again.
He is already 5 years old.
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