Marriage & Parenthood Package
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janet_lee88:
Agree. After one PSLE, the thought of going through another PSLE is daunting. If we don't put the same effort as the first kid, we will feel guilty. If we put the same effort, I think we will go crazy.ngl2010:
A few years ago, we read somewhere that the cost of raising a child is $300,000. With inflation, it is definitely higher now. Whatever is offered, it is not going to be enough. In addition, now it is so troublesome to have a maid, housing is more expensive (we definitely need a bigger house if we want another child), car is unaffordable and we need more time and money to send the child to tuition. How to have another child?
*Who looks after the baby? It's not fair to get grandparents to look after. A maid is not easily available nor reliable and is very expensive and troublesome.
*If surviving on single pay cheque, expenses are VERY tight.
*The cost of raising a child is very expensive as milk powder & diapers are expensive (even if using cloth diapers, water is not cheap)
*Going to school is insufficient...the child needs tuition because it is not possible to rely completely on the school
*Govt wants babies...but there are so many expenses involved.
*If couples want kids, the bb bonus is a bonus. If couples do not want, bonus is really no carrot. -
The package, really, is just a bonus incentive - to those who are already inclined to have children. However, the truth is that many choose to stop at one, or not have children at all. We are just so caught up in an environment where competition is so tough at workplace. Like it or not, whether it is public or private sector, the management will always expect attendance above 99% and productivity above 99%. On the paper, it looks so good. But how many can actually take 16 weeks of maternity leave - and not worry about being passed for a promotion, penalised on bonus and performance, etc? And these are real issues - like it or not, some pregnancies are much more demanding than others - as a result, performance does suffer.
And then there is the question, if one was ignorrant enough to have gone through one tough pregnancy and being somewhat \"penalised\" at work, how many would take the risk a second or third time? :siao: :siao:
Then there is the issue of childcare, education, etc.... :slapshead: -
PSLE will get tougher and tougher as years go by bcos MOE thinks kids go for IQ jabs. With my younger kid, we must try not to make the same mistakes…and that means earlier preparation. Come 2016, double stress - O level and PSLE…no no no, I will not have #3.
My hubby doesn’t earn a lot…but we make do with no maid, holidays nor restaurants. Food, grocery, petrol, insurance, parents’ maintenance and Eng/Chinese tuition make up the bulk of expenditure.
‘ME’ time now is every morning after kids go to school. After getting housework done, I am free to yak here…having #3 means my hard-earned ME time is gone.
When I see my newborn niece, I think of the long journey my brother and his wife will have to go through. Kids are not pumped with air like balloons. Another one, no thanks. -
Am I the only one here who thinks the package is rather comprehensive?
If I’m a new mum or mum-to-be, I’ll be overjoyed.
Maybe I am looking at it as a mother who hadn’t had all these money thrown at me to have kids way back then …
Having a child is ultimately one’s personal decision.
For those who are not opposed to the idea of having more kids,
I personally feel that this is a good impetus. -
[quote="straffan23"] But how many can actually take 16 weeks of maternity leave - and not worry about being passed for a promotion, penalised on bonus and performance, etc?[quote]
Actually, it is not just the maternity leave. Just heard that a ex-colleague is going to have her no. 4. She is in her early 40’s. On top of that, I heard she asked for a "demotion" so that she can cope with her family better. I was surprised to hear that as she is the career minded type but at the same time I also applaud her decision.
Personally with 3 kids and in order to ensure that I have work life balance so that I can spend time on coaching them (one is sitting for PSLE this year and dc2 is sitting for PSLE next year…), I told my boss that I am fine to stay on the same job = forgo promotion. Yes… over time I may be behind my peers but it’s a personal choice so that I can spend more time on family.
While we make "personal choice", we need to acknowledge that we will be pass over for opportunities/ promotion, etc… I suppose it really voice down to what we want in life. -
MMM:
Personal choice comes with a price. The important thing in life is not living with regret. Work life balance...is it really possible ???
[Personally with 3 kids and in order to ensure that I have work life balance so that I can spend time on coaching them (one is sitting for PSLE this year and dc2 is sitting for PSLE next year...), I told my boss that I am fine to stay on the same job = forgo promotion. Yes... over time I may be behind my peers but it's a personal choice so that I can spend more time on family.
While we make \"personal choice\", we need to acknowledge that we will be pass over for opportunities/ promotion, etc... I suppose it really voice down to what we want in life.
Hubby has 2 colleagues with kids sitting for PSLE this year...both of them are holding key roles and now want to pass on their responsibilities to the others. When son was sitting for PSLE last year, hubby did his role as normal. He only took 2 weeks in Sep to provide moral support. -
My views on this Parenthood package…
It shows that the Government is trying hard…
But in Developed Countries like Singapore, Japan ,Korea where Citizens are highly educated , they will think and think , calculate and calculate
is it worth…to bring kids to this complex society.
In Japan , when women married ,give birth , I think 99% will leave their job and stay at home…so Japan Birth rate is also vey low…
There is a saying that Japan Citizens will one day extinct because they are not reproducing enough among themselves and they do not welcome immigrants…
15 years ago each year New Borns in Singapore was about 50,000 plus plus…
Now is around 25,000???
Undeveloped Countries ,life is simple , husband work and wife will stay at home…so bringing kids to the family is adding strength and wealth…
Now my kids are in the teens , I always tell them :
a)Do not marry for the sake of marrying
b)Do not give birth for the sake of giving birth… -
janet_lee88:
work life balance comes with a price indeed! when i am 60 or 65 and close to retirement and knowing better that work does not mean anything, i want to know that i did all i could to have spent my time with my kids who by then grown up and indpendent and don't need me as much as before.
Personal choice comes with a price. The important thing in life is not living with regret. Work life balance...is it really possible ???
Hubby has 2 colleagues with kids sitting for PSLE this year...both of them are holding key roles and now want to pass on their responsibilities to the others. When son was sitting for PSLE last year, hubby did his role as normal. He only took 2 weeks in Sep to provide moral support. -
The govt did say that to have nor not to have kids and how many to have are very personal choices.
This may not mean much to those of us who already have our kids and have decided not to have anymore. But it does make some difference to those who are not closed to the option. It may not be the deciding factor but it helps ease some of the upfront commitments. And for those with fertility problems, it definitely helps.
Cannot say all the benefits don’t not help at all. It is a lot compared to last time when maternity leave was only 2mths and there is no such thing as baby bonus or CDA or medisave deduction for prenatal checks. Every single cent is from your own pocket. So even to start having a kid will be so daunting not to mention raise one.
But at the end of the day, the biggest hurdle will be the people’s mindset. -
Honestly, work life balance is quite bullsh!@. Sorry to say this.
Men are breadwinners…if they take a backseat, their careers will suffer.
I am not a career minded person. I have been a SAHM for the past 13 years…quit just before son was born…fortunately we did not have condo to support…bcos son was born with cleft lip and palate…that required many visits to the hospital, esp before/after his op. Even till now, he still requires visits to see the orthondontist & plastic surgeon. Which company will be supportive of me taking leave ?
Along the way, kids needed attention such teaching them ABCs and whatever. They are noisy and capable of driving me up the wall, but they bring joy too. They are taught manners and hygiene. They are sticky to me.
I will not be able to derive such happiness from the work place. Girl or boy, 2 is enough.
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