How to tell if a child is gifted?

[venuschan]

I guess HS is the solution, at least for my girl, I’m here in Malaysia, I skipped all Pre-school bc I can have more time to let her play/read at home, at least she has more time of her own, when my daughter was 6, she was doing Grade 5/6 US maths as well as following through certain topics in Primary 6 Singapore Maths, reason is I don’t want to hold her back since she already could understand integers, decimal and percentage at young age, I believe of all subjects, the most challenging is still math/simple daily physics concept, to make her kill her boredome is to make her do some critical thinking skill questions, other way is to do piano and abacus bc both need perfection. I don’t know bc we were HS back then so we have plenty of time to do, even to do craft work or to write her own story. Now she is in Primary 1. Yes, she complains I coop her up in school like chicken, that’s why I need to find something suitable for her to do. Still, all done under premise she must have a lot of time to PLAY, PLAY and PLAY first.

[sleepy]

rawafish:

I have been thinking about pulling her out from preschool. It just doesn't seem to make sense - she is not learning anything new there and not making new friends. The only reason to keep her there is to expose her socially since this is a department she is doing poorly in. But I wonder if it will help her at all.


Quite unsure at this moment. Perhaps I should get the school to consider letting her accelerate to K2? Will they allow that?

Anyone has any thoughts, do share. Would really appreciate it.

Academic pursuit is only one aspect in life. Knowing how to make friends goes a long long way, and is healthy for self esteem. My dd used to be an introvert when younger so I was extremely worried.

I insisted to send her to a preschool even though she's not learning much. In my opinion, preschool is a wonderful training ground to brush up social skills right from when the kids are young. What the preschool covers academically, I don't really care.

And in my dd's gep cohort, there are indeed some kids who are extremely introvert. And also a few kids who become unpopular because of arrogance or being too self centered. During growing years, kids should experience the joy of hanging out with different groups of friends & this also provide good opportunity for them to learn how to deal with peer pressure.

I think it's very important to learn how to get along with classmates so that school will become a fun place to look forward to everyday.


Regarding acceleration, my dd skipped a year and joined N1 class when she was 2 yo on teacher's recommendation, after attending playgroup for 3 months. She was in a montessori childcare at that time. I guess montessori is more receptive to level skipping? Anyway, I withdraw her towards end of N2 because I don't need childcare facility by then. I kept her at home for a year before placing her to a PCF kindy at K1 with kids same age as her

[mashy]

rawafish:

mashy:

[quote=\"rawafish\"]I read all the previous comments and have this strange feeling of excitement in me. I don't know why.


The reason why I came here was because a friend mentioned that my 4.5yo might be gifted. I don't think she is though. Bright, yes, but gifted, no. She is bored with K1 and finds her brother's K2 work easy. She doesn't have many friends in school (or at all) and went through crying episodes of refusing to go to school. It gets better but I can tell if given a choice she will choose home anyday. She is very mature for her age, reads a lot, very motivated, and does well for everything that is being taught without even trying too hard. I don't do a lot with her at home and we don't go for enrichment classes coz' 1) No time (3 young kids, no maid, travelling husband) 2) don't believe in it.

I have been thinking about pulling her out from preschool. It just doesn't seem to make sense - she is not learning anything new there and not making new friends. The only reason to keep her there is to expose her socially since this is a department she is doing poorly in. But I wonder if it will help her at all.

Quite unsure at this moment. Perhaps I should get the school to consider letting her accelerate to K2? Will they allow that?

Anyone has any thoughts, do share. Would really appreciate it.

If u manage to find a school that let her accelerate to K2, what are u going to do after she's done with k2 and yet still not of the age to enrol for primary school? Perhaps the school that u enrolled her in isn't challenging enough for her? Can u find one that will keep her at the same level but expose her to more challenging things so that she always has something to learn? Enrichment has its purpose besides 'tuition'. Some enrichment like music, arts and dance can help to develop a more well rounded child. Others when based on acad challenges the child to more problem solving skills too. So if she's under challenged in preschool, look for more things for her to learn. If extra classes is out, and you can afford the time, teach her yourself.

Thanks Mashy.
I should clarify - enrichment classes I meant classes like \"I can read\", \"Berries\", \"Learning Lab\" those academic ones.

My girl is taking ballet and piano classes, both she asked for. And swimming and blading. Classes that parents say are \"useless\". Oh well. Most importantly she enjoys them.

I do try to teach at home. Randomly got a P1 book and tried to be a kiasu parent. Taught her number bonds, which she understood almost immediately. Should I teach her more?

I chose this preschool because it is the least academic one that I could find, no spelling, no ting xie, no homework.. maybe I'm not even sure what I want for her? I didn't want the kids to have to slog for school so early in their lives, to enjoy their childhood, but it turns out they (my son as well) feel underchallenged. (The difference is my son LOVES school, LOVES his friends, and doesn't mind doing \"too easy\" things that he already knows)[/quote]Hehehe, then u probably just chose the wrong school for them. We should choose schools (besides logistics etc) based on our children's character and needs. If your kids feel so under challenged, you should perhaps change school for them. The laid back school isn't suitable for them.

[rawafish]

While I agree with sleepy on the importance of socialising, it doesn’t seem like a good idea to keep her in school feeling totally bored and restless just for the sake of making friends? When she was in N2 (~3yo), she would approach her classmates and ask them if she could play with them. Kids being kids at 3yo, they just ran off. And she took it as a rejection. A little too mature for her age, I feel, and she gets along much better with older kids.

Anyway.
Does that mean that HS doesn’t = enough socialising as compared to preschools? It is hard to recreate that school environment with so many kids no matter how big effort I make to arrange playdates etc hor? Sigh. No perfect solution.

[pirate]

You might want to go take a look at the NAFA Arts Kindergarten. Not too academic, but not too laid back. Plenty of arts, music and dance to keep the kiddoes amused. And if the music teachers think your DD may also be gifted in music, they will recommend her for audition with the NAFA School of Young Talents' Gifted Young Pianist Course. SYT would keep her busy with at least 1-2 hours daily piano practice. :evil:


Unfortunately, it has a waiting list, but apparenty the afternoon session is not so bad.

[sleepy]

rawafish:

While I agree with sleepy on the importance of socialising, it doesn't seem like a good idea to keep her in school feeling totally bored and restless just for the sake of making friends? When she was in N2 (~3yo), she would approach her classmates and ask them if she could play with them. Kids being kids at 3yo, they just ran off. And she took it as a rejection. A little too mature for her age, I feel, and she gets along much better with older kids.

Anyway.

I encourage my dd to initiate contact and talk to as many new friends as possible, don't just stick to her one or two friends comfort zone. With daily contact & interaction, kids gradually realised my dd is helpful and willing to share her knowledge and start inviting her into their little circles. And she slowly draws herself out from her introvert shell and is able to make new friends more easily. It wasn't an easy journey during those years while she struggled to break away from her introvert nature.

By P2 and P3, my dd is like a celebrity in her class. Okay, this part way exceeded our original expectation

[metz]

rawafish:

While I agree with sleepy on the importance of socialising, it doesn't seem like a good idea to keep her in school feeling totally bored and restless just for the sake of making friends? When she was in N2 (~3yo), she would approach her classmates and ask them if she could play with them. Kids being kids at 3yo, they just ran off. And she took it as a rejection. A little too mature for her age, I feel, and she gets along much better with older kids.

Not so much of maturity. Perhaps she needs to learn how to handle rejections.

rawafish:

Anyway.
Does that mean that HS doesn't = enough socialising as compared to preschools? It is hard to recreate that school environment with so many kids no matter how big effort I make to arrange playdates etc hor? Sigh. No perfect solution.

Yes, even with playdates on regular basis, it would be almost impossible to recreate the social environment a school has. Question is - why do you want to recreate one for your child when you think she is not thriving in that evironment? Aren't you contradicting yourself?

Homeschooling isn't equivalent to depriving the children of social interaction with other kids. There exists many settings for socialisation besides school. If you can, try talking to homeschoolers on this topic. The yahoo homeschoolers have been organising various activities and events. They even have a concert on an annual basis.

[simple2005]

rawafish:

Thanks Mashy.
I should clarify - enrichment classes I meant classes like \"I can read\", \"Berries\", \"Learning Lab\" those academic ones.

My girl is taking ballet and piano classes, both she asked for. And swimming and blading. Classes that parents say are \"useless\". Oh well. Most importantly she enjoys them.

I do try to teach at home. Randomly got a P1 book and tried to be a kiasu parent. Taught her number bonds, which she understood almost immediately. Should I teach her more?

I chose this preschool because it is the least academic one that I could find, no spelling, no ting xie, no homework.. maybe I'm not even sure what I want for her? I didn't want the kids to have to slog for school so early in their lives, to enjoy their childhood, but it turns out they (my son as well) feel underchallenged. (The difference is my son LOVES school, LOVES his friends, and doesn't mind doing \"too easy\" things that he already knows)

Just my 2cts worth.

Go easy on the P1 books, no point doing it now, since it sounds like she's going to breeze through even if she will be learning them only when in P1, it'll keep them relatively interested in school (to learn something new) rather than being bored because they already know it.

More importantly to explore things out of academic curriculum
1. allow her to explore the world around, go for nature walks/talks the guides share their knowledge, no tests, just let her listen and learn on her own. Don't expect the kid to regurgitate out what was spoken, but it does stay in the head somewhere, waiting to be pulled out later
2. Read. Read. Read. She likes to read, let her read. Children can find out things that they really like through reading various books. What is she reading now? With a good skill in reading, they can study on their own easier
3. Travel, if finances allow, if it's in your blood (to travel on your own), and your child can and not too shy to speak. Go to places where interaction with people. I prefer Youth Hostels, B&Bs, where my children gets to interact with the locals or fellow travelers.

Somethings just can't be taught and must be experienced, and what is learnt just cannot be quantified, so do not worry about what you think they actually learnt through those experiences.

Cheers.

[venuschan]

[quote="rawafish"]While I agree with sleepy on the importance of socialising, it doesn’t seem like a good idea to keep her in school feeling totally bored and restless just for the sake of making friends? When she was in N2 (~3yo), she would approach her classmates and ask them if she could play with them. Kids being kids at 3yo, they just ran off. And she took it as a rejection. A little too mature for her age, I feel, and she gets along much better with older kids.

Anyway.



I have a highly gifted child, I see her pain more than mine bc she is the one going through the system. 

Since you mentioned under challenged, hence, I only give my 2cents on ideas why we should in a away stop shoving them under challenged work. 

In fact you could improve her situation by introducing any types of challenging activities,  (1) the structured ones, to name a few, piano, abacus, robotics…swimming, even reading, reading with skill or even listening to audio files  etc, (2) the unstructured ones,  any types of plays, drawing, singing…anything that’s fun…

Like said, most challenging activities need perfection, and problem with gifted kids is they thought their giftedness is innate, nature, not nurture,  in a way,  they are too young to understand factual fact that effort and failures are often siblings in life.  I’m afraid by constantly shoving any under challenged work would likely  forbidding them moving out form their comfort zone.  I once recalled how my girl started abacus at 5.9yo, according to age, she supposed to do only preliminary/foundation level, with pace, she should skip, hence,  by giving her work according to age, she complained and lamented with boredom but stopped lamenting after few levels skipped until one day I started to realize she had gone past her age many years to acquire that hard skill by doing all big sums mentally, for sums like 256x56 or 3456/34 etc and she was only 6 that time. 

So, I think with some modified changes in our approach, our responsive to their pleas,  not only we manage to know their potential, also more importantly, more "humbly" in their mindset towards life as a whole.

Sent from my iPad

[rawafish]

[quote]
Yes, even with playdates on regular basis, it would be almost impossible to recreate the social environment a school has. Question is - why do you want to recreate one for your child when you think she is not thriving in that evironment? Aren't you contradicting yourself?[/quote]Social interaction in school is the only reason why I am interested in putting her in school. That is why if I were to HS her, I would wish to recreate that environment, EVEN IF she is not thriving yet. She is not doing well in making friends, but that doesn't mean that I want her to stop trying.