Club SAHM

[jedamum]

metz:

A JC friend posed me this question about my ambition when we were 18. My answer must have startled him, haha. Told him it was my dream to have a family with 2 kids and be a housewife. My husband must love me enough to allow me to make choices about working. So yes, I am really glad that I am living my dream now

my ambition was to have my own space(living in a family of six, having to share almost everything, queue up for bathrooms and getting hand me downs all the time...) . now sahm....a lot of own space and i call the shots. lol. sahm living with ILs is a different ballgame hor.... ..that one...can frustrate oneself to no end....

[janet88]

ammonite:

janet_lee88:

The other reason for not sending son for tuition was largely because of MONEY.

:hugs: That must have hurt your husband even more. Indeed a painful thought.

But our first kid is often part experiment. My second child is definitely better prepared simply because I have a better idea what to expect.

Yes, it was painful...bcos like some mummies here, we felt it was primary school...why is there a need for tutors? Many of us went through primary school without tutors...but I needed CL tuition :oops:

To re-organize family expenses to include tuition was :frustrated: but we had to. Hubby just couldn't coach son for his daily Math homework. After 1-2 months, son started to pick up and could do his homework.
My first kid is, sad to say, an experiment. Whatever mistakes we made with him, we hope it doesn't repeat again.

Understanding Math doesn't mean can teach math...no offence to anyone ok...hubby understands Math (algebra NOT models) but those prob sums were indeed killers.

[ammonite]

ScaredyMum:

I really :salute: you all for being able to make it happen despite the ever increasing cost of living, tuition fees etc etc...

I have been wishing to quit my job and be a SAHM for 6 years now, but never have the courage to do so. No matter how I calculate and calculate, it just seem impossible to live on a single income, with the high tuition fees, housing installments etc and I am not even talking about expensive holidays and other indulgences.

:hugs: Don't compare. There are many individual differences in circumstances that you won't know online. Single income can range from $4k to $50k a month. Commitments can be a flat bought at a high or a condo unit bought at a low. Number of dependents, allowances for parents, long term medical bills etc. All different. There are SAHM with maids and a car, and others bao ka liao. Even among these two groups, there are the well buffered and the poorly buffered.

Just do what you think is best for your family, you cannot do anymore than that.

[metz]

jedamum:

my ambition was to have my own space(living in a family of six, having to share almost everything, queue up for bathrooms and getting hand me downs all the time...) . now sahm....a lot of own space and i call the shots. lol. sahm living with ILs is a different ballgame hor.... ..that one...can frustrate oneself to no end....

Space constraints, that I can totally empathize with you cos I come from a family of six too. My husband comes from an even bigger family - a family of 8 (grandparents excluded hor). I can still recall myself daydreaming about planning my own personal room space. Those were the days... Now more space means more housework to me :sick:

Look on the brighter side, at least you don't have to stay with them now.

[sharonkhoo]

metz:

A JC friend posed me this question about my ambition when we were 18. My answer must have startled him, haha. Told him it was my dream to have a family with 2 kids and be a housewife. My husband must love me enough to allow me to make choices about working. So yes, I am really glad that I am living my dream now

If you had asked me then, I would have said I was the last person to want to be a SAHM. Not that I was very ambitious, but I did want a career and I've never really liked kids. But once I had a baby, I couldn't bear the thought of handing it over to someone else for hours a day, and thankfully, my husband preferred to entrust babycare to me than to someone else, even at the cost of my income. But I still don't see my whole future tied up in my kids and their kids!

[.036281.036281.036281]

janet_lee88:

The other reason for not sending son for tuition was largely because of MONEY. .

While I applaud your devotion to your kids' welfare, I just can't believe you splash so much on a branded wallet just to spite your hubby.

:roll:

[sleepy]

ScaredyMum:

I am not even talking about expensive holidays and other indulgences.

These are wants not needs. Perfectly fine to do without. The first thing I cut down is travel budget after I quit my job.

[sleepy]

ammonite:

Single income can range from $4k to $50k a month.

:yikes:
I wonder what kind of jobs can earn $50K a month? SME bosses?

Like that can be rich tai tai leow.

[sleepy]

jedamum:

I thought i can do 1-to-1 for Chinese, but that was an extremely tedious period. It is difficult to teach language which requires very good foundation on the part of the one who teaches and able to know what is within syllabus, as Chinese scope is wide.

My Chinese is pretty good yo. But my dd 不受教 le, she doesn't want me to coach her. She said she rather go tuition which make sense because she spent all her time negotiating with me when I tried to guide her.

[sleepy]

slmkhoo:

metz:

If I were to judge them based on the effort they put in, I will be screaming at them for every paper. My boy was still reading storybooks the nights before his exam last year.

As long as he had done sufficient revision before he read his story books, I would have no problem with it. We should judge effort by other criteria as well, not just by time spent.

My dd won't even revise if she has her way. She always says she knows everything & that it's boring to revise. But I wanted her to get into the habit of preparing. So I insist she must at least glance through. If she revise sufficiently, I would be ready to accept whatever results she achieved. That's like our little pact since p1.

Nowadays whenever her classmates mentioned their parents gonna scold them for their results, my dd always feels so fortunate compared to them & proudly declare 'my mummy never once scold me over my marks'.