All About Full-Time Maids
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kiasimom:
Chief, may I suggest something ....Right now, I am really concerned about peapot.
Sista, do update us regularly on your status.
You have all of us here to support you :hugs:
Its really fantastic that a few forummers are managing to run their household really well w/o the need for full time helpers. Really, kudos should be given to them.
However, may I suggest that a separate thread be created for them ... something like All About Without Maids or something like that so that like-minded forummers can contribute/benefit from this thread. I mean, for example, after reading their posts, I myself am tempted to try what they have been doing if in the event my helper does not want to renew her contract.
okie, anyway, to cut the long story short, the reason why I am suggesting this is because I believe this thread is in existence because it is to help like-minded parents who have maids but yet need advice/support on how to handle them. Currently, one of the forummers is in need of support and I think we can focus on giving it to her, w/o being side-tracked
Just my humble opinion Chief .... -
Peapot dear,
I'm so sorry I've not been logging in coz I'm busy trying to find my footing in the New Year but here's my 2 cts worth:peapot:
If you and DH are concerned with doing the \"decent thing\", then let the maid go for the interview in the afternoon while you are away and insist on her returning before 6.30 pm (then take early off that day, just in case). I'd have thought that the restaurant opens for business right?My child is 6 and will be going P1 on the 4th Jan. The school bus will pick her up at 11.45am and she will be back at 7pm. How ironic can it get? She's actually safer in school than at home!!!!!???? My hubby says he will station at home in the morning for a week and see how it goes.
The part about 8-9pm is also suspect, dear peapot. What's she going to do? Have OTJ training (which by the way is illegal if she doesn't have the S-pass and is on the FDW stamp)?peapot:
Better yet, why don't you ask her to cook for herself and then pack food home from now till the new maid arrives. I'd feel safer that way.. :love:In the afternoon, my maid will be alone. We will just have to leave it as it is. We also try to eat first and leave the leftover we've eaten for her so that all of us are eating the same food. In that way, we are assured she didn't do anything funny to the food.
Understand that this is stinking timing esp when DD is just about to enter P1 but she's really holding you guys hostage. Who's to say this is the last-est
request?
Kiasimom, Tamarind jies and other forumers have suggested sending her back without further warning. If there's a temporary workaround for DD for childcare arrangements, and if you can work flexi and be there when she returns, may be worth a try till the new maid comes in.
That said, take heart and keep the faith...tell yourself, it's just 2-3 weeks more. At the end of the episode, you'd be much stronger, sista...
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CKS, please assist…would like to concentrate on providing some support to forummer who’s running through a tough patch now…quite a bit of distraction with the details on robots. Skunk had started a thread once on this.
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Is there any robot available to take care of babies ? I mean carry them, feed them, bathe them, change their diapers and entertain them ? I know there are infant centers and childcare centers. But if you want your child to be in good hands, you need to have a lot of money to put them in places like the Pat Schoolhouse (over $1000 a month).
When you return home, you still need to do the night feedings. Then wake up early next morning to go to work. Not every mommy is a super woman.
Is there any robot that can cook delicious meals ? I really cannot cook, and I don't intend to stand in the kitchen after a very long day at work. I don't want my kids to grow up eating food bought from outside.
It is possible to find a good maid. We just have to keep looking. My current maid, who is my maid number 8, is the most wonderful person I know. She is not a super maid who can do house work very quickly. But she is humble, respectful, cheerful, honest, and she takes my instructions very seriously.
It is not right to generalize and say that all maids are bad. By giving up on maids altogether, it is like saying that it is not possible to find a good maid from Indonesia, Philippines, Myanmar, etc.
You may not be able to find a good maid, but if you know how to manage a maid properly, things can still work out well for you.
http://singaporemaid.blogspot.com/2007/07/how-to-manage-maid.html
A lot of unhappiness is the result of misunderstandings.
For example, if you don't like your maid to listen to your conversation, then put it down in your list of house rules and tell her on the first day. If your maid knows this right from the beginning, then she will not do the wrong thing to upset you.
Check out my house rules here :
http://singaporemaidinfo.blogspot.com/2008/11/house-rules-by-tamarind.html -
tamarind:
Nope, currently no robots can take care of kids :lol: but they can certainly take the pain out of alot of housework, for people who have enough time/energy to care for their own kids but have no more juice left for housework, they're worth investing in.Is there any robot available to take of babies ? I mean carry them, feed them, bathe them, change their diapers and entertain them ?
When you return home, you still need to do the night feedings. Then wake up early next morning to go to work. Not every mommy is a super woman.
Is there any robot that can cook delicious meals ?
Not every mommy is a superwoman, but all good mummies are superwomen....and they're not born like that, they grow into one
too bad, no robot can cook delicious meals hehe....we just have to make sure we have enough time and energy to do so....Life is just like this, isn't it?
If not for the fact that it's humanly impossible for me to single-handedly care for a 13 month old and a newborn at the same time, I wouldn't have employed a maid.....for those with only one kid, or 2 widely spaced apart, robots + some sacrifice of time and energy is still a better bargain than getting a maid.
That said, my maid gets to enjoy my gadgets, the dishwasher and steam mopper cuts down her housework tremendously, so i have a lightly-worked maid who's not under stress and can devote more time n energy to care for my baby
She hates to use the vaccuming robot though, she says it's not clean enough hahaha....of course lah, no robot can do any task better than humans hands...or else we will be obselete lol -
skunk:
Wah, I really like your post. How true. All mummies are superwoman indeed because we have to be.
Nope, currently no robots can take care of kids :lol: but they can certainly take the pain out of alot of housework, for people who have enough time/energy to care for their own kids but have no more juice left for housework, they're worth investing in.tamarind:
Is there any robot available to take of babies ? I mean carry them, feed them, bathe them, change their diapers and entertain them ?
When you return home, you still need to do the night feedings. Then wake up early next morning to go to work. Not every mommy is a super woman.
Is there any robot that can cook delicious meals ?
Not every mommy is a superwoman, but all good mummies are superwomen....and they're not born like that, they grow into one
too bad, no robot can cook delicious meals hehe....we just have to make sure we have enough time and energy to do so....Life is just like this, isn't it?
If not for the fact that it's humanly impossible for me to single-handedly care for a 13 month old and a newborn at the same time, I wouldn't have employed a maid.....for those with only one kid, or 2 widely spaced apart, robots + some sacrifice of time and energy is still a better bargain than getting a maid.
That said, my maid gets to enjoy my gadgets, the dishwasher and steam mopper cuts down her housework tremendously, so i have a lightly-worked maid who's not under stress and can devote more time n energy to care for my baby
She hates to use the vaccuming robot though, she says it's not clean enough hahaha....of course lah, no robot can do any task better than humans hands...or else we will be obselete lol
There's cooking robot I use: Thermomix. But they are not sold in Singapore. It cost me $3000+ to ship it from UK. If anyone wants to try, please PM me.
And it's true, no robots can do better than human hands, but the time released is fabulous, and it gets close enough for me.
I don't think maids behave badly because they are worked. Rather, they are influenced. The maid who worked for me for 7 years worked harder than anyone but loved her job. Those that have a partner are so free, they used to sing to each other, they sat down and find fault. I think influence is very important. Depends who your maid mix around with.
Peapot, try to see if you can do without a maid. If so, your problem is GONE forever. -
tamarind:
Hi Tamarind,Is there any robot available to take of babies ? I mean carry them, feed them, bathe them, change their diapers and entertain them ? I know there are infant centers and childcare centers. But if you want your child to be in good hands, you need to have a lot of money to put them in places like the Pat Schoolhouse (over $1000 a month).
When you return home, you still need to do the night feedings. Then wake up early next morning to go to work. Not every mommy is a super woman.
Is there any robot that can cook delicious meals ? I really cannot cook, and I don't intend to stand in the kitchen after a very long day at work. I don't want my kids to grow up eating food bought from outside.
It is possible to find a good maid. We just have to keep looking. My current maid, who is my maid number 8, is the most wonderful person I know. She is not a super maid who can do house work very quickly. But she is humble, respectful, cheerful, honest, and she takes my instructions very seriously.
It is not right to generalize and say that all maids are bad. By giving up on maids altogether, it is like saying that it is not possible to find a good maid from Indonesia, Philippines, Myanmar, etc.
You may not be able to find a good maid, but if you know how to manage a maid properly, things can still work out well for you.
http://singaporemaid.blogspot.com/2007/07/how-to-manage-maid.html
A lot of unhappiness is the result of misunderstandings.
For example, if you don't like your maid to listen to your conversation, then put it down in your list of house rules and tell her on the first day. If your maid knows this right from the beginning, then she will not do the wrong thing to upset you.
Check out my house rules here :
http://singaporemaidinfo.blogspot.com/2008/11/house-rules-by-tamarind.html
Wah! You are indeed meticulous with your rules. I have only 3 golden rules, which I convey to every maid on their arrival:
1. No lies
2. No boyfriends
3. No stealing
Problem is, every maid I have broke some or all the rules, behind me or in front of me.
Also, if you can cope, why live with a maid? When my 7-year-old maid saw that I was 8 months pregnant and she thought I needed her badly, she deliberately disobeyed my instructions (not to pour oil into the sink), and refused to talk to me for weeks because I told her not to. Then, she said she wanted to go home. She didn't guess I really would. Even very faithful maids can turn against you - just like friends.
So, my point is, we should all try to cope. But if we can't, then all your rules will be really good! -
For mommies with kids 6 years and above, I do agree that it is possible to use robots instead of maids.
But please do not assume that all mommies can afford to buy all those robots. Robots can also spoil and they need to be repaired. I have changed 3 washing machines, and 2 dryers within the last 10 years.
It is not true that all mommies can become superwomen if they want to. I hope super mommies can have some sympathy for ordinary mommies like me. My work requires me to stand for many hours a day talking at the top of my voice. When I am home, I am already dead tired. I am not going to make life difficult for myself. I have found a good maid, and I am very happy that I have her. I know many other families who have good maids too. -
Hi Tamarind, Kiasimom, Andaiz, Autumnbronze, cmm,
Thankyou for the support. Hope I didn’t miss out anyone. I wished I could send her back immediately. I have already confirm a maid for those who are not aware and thus will not get a transfer maid. Now waiting for agency to check whether can arrive earlier than end Jan.
I have spoken to my mum and blessed her she says she will take off to help me out. Kinship is really important in times like this. Sometimes I feel sad that I don’t have enough help and this is also the reason why I do not want to have another one. The government can give all kinds of incentive but it never covers this area at all. My mum will let me know tomorrow how many days she can take off and then I will decide when to send the maid off. Anyway, I m stronger now. The maid seems strangely normal these few days.
My boss won’t be pleased with me since all of us has cleared our leave last year. Imagine when my new maid is here, I still need to take leave to train her!! If she turns out to be another nightmare, I think I will just do without a maid!! -
peapot,
Do feel free to write here whenever you need help. We may not be able to provide solutions for you, but we can give you moral support !
Yes it is true that when we have kids, grandparents become the most reliable source of help. The gahmen does give tax relief for grandparents staying with us. But that amount is like peanuts. I know many other grandparents who would rather work than look after grandchildren.
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