Why students study more during school holidays
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lee_yl\" post_id=\"2135369\" time=\"1718962917\" user_id=\"17023:
I left my job when my girls were P3 and P1. Reason not because I want them to go IP. It’s because I brought so much work stress home that every question they asked me about Sch work will result in me venting my frustrations at them which was very unhealthy to our relationships. My hubs just told me to take it easy quit and be taitai lol.
I stressed over PSLE back then was because I hope my girls can make it to IP (need not be RGS/NYGH) to avoid yet another high stress year at O-level and out of fear that at 16, grabbling with puberty-related issues, girls may be too distracted to do well.
Maybe you can share with us what was the motivation behind your decision to resign from your high paying job to be with your kids prior their PSLE exams? -
Imp75\" post_id=\"2135380\" time=\"1718967900\" user_id=\"2358:
Thanks for your sharing. Actually your hub could have taken on the tutor role mah.
I left my job when my girls were P3 and P1. Reason not because I want them to go IP. It’s because I brought so much work stress home that every question they asked me about Sch work will result in me venting my frustrations at them which was very unhealthy to our relationships. My hubs just told me to take it easy quit and be taitai lol.
You’re experience is not uncommon as a number of working mums I know quit when their kids were in primary sch. One of my friends thought her Pri sch kid was reading or doing homework while she was working until she found out that the grandma had been giving the kid handphone so that the grandma could have some peace. My friend resigned with immediate effect. While my friend’s resignation is not not directly related to IP, she definitely quit out of concern for her kid’s education. -
lee_yl\" post_id=\"2135383\" time=\"1718975671\" user_id=\"17023:
Really? Then I must hv been a chilled mom bc my girls were exactly brought up this way in a nanny’s home with tv and iPad whole day and attended neighbourhood pcf kindy haha.
Thanks for your sharing. Actually your hub could have taken on the tutor role mah.
You’re experience is not uncommon as a number of working mums I know quit when their kids were in primary sch. One of my friends thought her Pri sch kid was reading or doing homework while she was working until she found out that the grandma had been giving the kid handphone so that the grandma could have some peace. My friend resigned with immediate effect. While my friend’s resignation is not not directly related to IP, she definitely quit out of concern for her kid’s education.
Back to me being SAHM during those years. I think my presence also helped. I removed their Chinese tuition (they didn’t hv any other), I taught them myself, assigned regular work (specially curated bc I believed in tackling only weakness and not cramming lots of practices bc I also wanted them to hv time for play/rest) on top of Sch work, assisted my eldest in her sports dsa journey, made connections, volunteered in Sch and made my girls presence felt, anything and everything I could do for my girls, I would.
However before my girls psle journey concluded, I went back to FT work and then they were on their own again. -
Giving up a job to raise kids doesn’t guarantee good outcomes. In fact, with some family support and efficient use of external help available, a parent’s exposure to the outside world in a professional capacity can even help the child go further because one can communicate and engage with the kids at a higher level.
I can see a lot of parents are under a lot of stress, most of it self inflicted. If we always focus on the academics rather than the relationship with our child, we will lose many bonding and teaching moments. We play a lot with our kids when they are young. Through play, we teach them to do their best. This means before the game or even exams, we put in our best resources, prepare our ammunitions, and do our best when the “game” starts.
Putting up a strong fight doesn’t mean one must win. As long as the child (and ourselves) understands that, there is no stress. In fact one might even have fun in the process. The focus should really be on building character and resilience. Once the child masters that, sooner or later the child can maximise their potential in every exam or challenge.
As a parent with kids in IP schools, I do see the benefits of the system. However, I do not agree getting into IP is a sure way (and is surely not the only way) to success and not getting into one won’t mean one is doomed for life too. Take it easy, parents. There are many pathways. If we adults put labels and brands on schools, we are creating the exact toxic environment that we do not want our kids to grow up in.
:siam: -
doodbug\" post_id=\"2135312\" time=\"1718869212\" user_id=\"13281:
This is the point that i was trying to agree with when i spoke up in my earlier comment.
I know that one cannot run away from streaming/sorting forever. There must be some way to determine who gets into university, and which course in university.
In most countries, major national sorting only occurs at the 16 year old or some, even the 18 year old stage.
I know that I am in the minority here, but I still do not support sorting at a national level, at 12 years old, which is what our PSLE does. I don't see it as a necessary step. Worse still, unlike any other major exams which you can retake, you can't retake PSLE. The problem is not with the PSLE, but what PSLE is used for and what it determines - I wonder if MOE is able to see this point. They cannot keep blaming parents for being kiasu. Society, including parents and children, are shaped by the structures and systems. The system rewards those who do well academically handsomely - hence the whole flurry anxiety over performing well academically.
I spoke up because i wanted to see if MOE (or some opposition politicians if they wish. HELLO: elections this year, any leader want to hear our voice) will look into the structural causes of the stress and anxiety of psle.
I spoke up, not for myself (already past the sour grapes that i have eaten, dont worry, and don’t worry also about my child, who is really happy go lucky type) but for the current and future batches of kids i see in those documentaries who are under pressure to get into IP.
IP has wonderful enrichment programs, well touted and all know that. Are the IP schools willing to open up these programs to the Express kids in their community so that they can benefit as well? -
For my 2 fellas, they do not study during holidays. I stop all tuition right after exams and will resume only when school starts. Given that their tutors also seem to go for their own vacation during the school holidays, I think quite a lot of their students’ parents stop tuition during the holidays too. DD had tuition up to O levels while DS did not have any tuition after primary school. The whole holiday was really for all to unwind.
I do see friends and even my own sister insisting that they have to continue with a regiment of tuition and assign work for their kids else the kids will struggle when school starts. Admittedly my 2 fellas will be sluggish with their work when school starts after the holidays and their initial few assessments might take a hit but they do catch up thereafter.
I agree that there is societal pressure and expectations and I did feel it too when kids were going through their PSLE, O levels and all. Ultimately, we parents have to be the ones to filter and shield our kids from all these excessive pressure and allow them to find their own footing. -
For us, we avoid tuitions during school holiday except covid period. To me, I somehow feel that some would prefer the holiday prog and probably skip the weekly regular lessons?
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zac's mum\" post_id=\"2135398\" time=\"1719018510\" user_id=\"53606:[quote=\"zac's mum\" post_id=2135398 time=1719018510 user_id=53606]
Sorry for my early misunderstanding, actually what do you think MOE should do? Removal of IP system, or allow students to join the IP track any time in their secondary school when their have improvement in the exam results? Will it be chaotic when O or N level students can join back to IP track any time? I believe it would be difficult to let primary 6 to re-take PSLE exam because MOE may not want a secondary 1 class having students with 12, 13 or 14 year old.
This is the point that i was trying to agree with when i spoke up in my earlier comment.
I spoke up because i wanted to see if MOE (or some opposition politicians if they wish. HELLO: elections this year, any leader want to hear our voice) will look into the structural causes of the stress and anxiety of psle.
I spoke up, not for myself (already past the sour grapes that i have eaten, dont worry, and don’t worry also about my child, who is really happy go lucky type) but for the current and future batches of kids i see in those documentaries who are under pressure to get into IP.
IP has wonderful enrichment programs, well touted and all know that. Are the IP schools willing to open up these programs to the Express kids in their community so that they can benefit as well?[/quote]
My kid was not from IP track and I have no pro or against this system. But if you think IP track is very important to kids, it will cause lot of stress and anxiety on it. However, for DH's whole family, including brother in law....no one care about IP track and kids were all brought up without the stress and anxiety about PSLE but they all went university.
As a parent, may be other may claim I am not a real mother, what life you want our kids to lead? What are we teaching them - on the most important things in their life? -
I think MGS has made a good start in piloting mixed form classes comprising both IP and OP students.
It is good for the elites to be out of their ivory tower & realize that maybe they are not all that different from the ones who may have missed the cut. And that academic capability should be viewed with a growth mindset, not a fixed mindset.
I do not want to say any more about the sentiment on the ground, lest it becomes personal against my parenting again. -
isnt it the usual practice for all JCs to hv common tests/mye/bock tests/timed practice (whatever they are called) right after June holidays? Almost impossible for JC kids not to study/revise/catch up during this holiday. How much to study will really depend on how focused/effective each individual is.