In-law problems?

[r2010]

Hi garam,



When it come to in laws no matter what you do,you are always not their daughter. I am going through the same. This year my Ds did better than my SIL son. So SIL have been going on hardcore basis to bad mouth me to all her relatives. it really hurts me emotionally that a person can go to that extend but I tend to ignore as I feel pity for this kind of person who are full of jealously in their heart. Not too worry, you are not alone out there. I would suggest to not waste time in investing in the relationship that you knows will go nowhere. Just do whatever you feel like doing it. And be prepared that you will not be recognised for any of your good deeds to this \"black hearted\"people. :stompfeet:

[singmathstutor]

Hi Garam, please allow me to offer some comments. I feel that sometimes, we can’t change the what people think about us. Also, sometimes we can’t prevent what others may speak about us. There are all sorts of people around us. Sometimes these may even be your cloest siblings. in your case, I feel as long as your hubby knows who you are and believes in you. That is much more important.

[ningning]

just888:

ningning,


Hugs...How come ur MIL scold u a bad woman? On what ground? Is there any misunderstanding that happen before? Does your hubby knows about it when the incident happens? Sorry for so many questions ask.

That is bcoz she got this thinking that siblings quarrel due to my doings. She had nvr tot that is her spoilt daughter that keep on badmouthed me and behaved rude to me , she always talk without looking at me. My dh sometimes can't stand the way she treated me and told her off. Actually comes to the ridiculous point is that my dh n sil wasn't closed at all even before our marriage , they used to quarrel on their family business stuff also. So it is crazy and ridiculous of PILs to say I caused a drift between sibling. My dh work in their family business and I believe PILs tot they wholly own their son Including me , his wife. Once PILs and their brat all gang together and attack me verbally with all kinds of insults when my dh stood up for me. one couldn't imagine that is in today's modern society
Singapore. Mil even wanted to bash me with an umbrella , its only when she tried to beat my dh, only did FIL tired to stop her, if not he will just stood and watched. Since that day i had lost all repect for FIL. I am an educated
singaporean, I can't believe what I heard and what I had gone through. It's barbarian.

I had ceased all communications with them till I gave birth to my dd. I tot they had learnt , I was wrong again. That brat again \"sick\" again, though i hardly talk to her but she always lied to her parents to smear me. Then as usual PIL tot that their \"sweet angel\" was bullied again. I knew she was
jealous that I can get along well with my dh whereas she just can't. Coz my dh cant stand her temper and how she always acted \"big sister\" to us though she is the junior.

I had since distant myself totally from them like south n north pole. But cny is coming soon, i was in dilemma few days ago. But now I made up my mind firmly, My dd will not turn up at all. My dh will go re dinner and ist day cny. I saw how PIL went all way to \"protect\" their girl that they had hurt me. So if I dun love myself and protect my feeling, who will do so for me? So I can't let my dd go there and call that brat\" gu gu\".

[laughingcat]

Hi ningning, i feel so sorry for what you have gone through. Personally if your PIL treats you badly like physically attack you while you are preggie, then you have every rights not to let your child goes to the re dinner with your DH.

[just888]

:hugs: Hugs to u ningning.

Kinda of drama in that household. Luckily u all are not staying together else war time. I think no matter what, your PIL should not have raise a finger on u. On what rights do they have?

Do what u feels good about it, afterall you have the support of ur hubby that's the most important.

[fifiyeo]

[quote]My dh sometimes can't stand the way she treated me and told her off. Actually comes to the ridiculous point is that my dh n sil wasn't closed at all even before our marriage , they used to quarrel on their family business stuff also. So it is crazy and ridiculous of PILs to say I caused a drift between sibling. My dh work in their family business and I believe PILs tot they wholly own their son Including me , his wife. Once PILs and their brat all gang together and attack me verbally with all kinds of insults when my dh stood up for me. one couldn't imagine that is in today's modern society

Singapore. [/quote]
Ningng,

I completely understand your stiuation. Mine is almost similiar. Sometimes really don't know what went wrong even when we don't do anything. Never picked a fight but always being picked at!! :mad:
Take easy.

[ningning]

Thanks just888, laughingcat, fifiyeo, thanks for the hugs and consoles.


ya mine is like a korean, hk drama… Pil and sil get periodically "sick" on and off. ya i agreed, i din even do anything wrong nor breathe a word also kana picked, smear and badmouthed on. my dh cant stood up for me, if not the whole pack begin to yelling, shouting and cursing me non-stop. u will not believe that spoilt is an educated adult. Her imaginery is beyond what i can comprehend. she can comes out with all kinds of illogically scenerio on me, and PILs will believe 100% to my amusement and start to attack me verbally. With her in that household, i will nvr put a step beyond that door. whenever me dh argue with any of sil, i am the one that is to be blame and most of the time i dun even know what happened. i am sorry to say that is kind of "siao" family to me.

lucky my dh understood what i went through and agree that i cut off contact with them. coz he knew he cant protect me, so the best solution stay away from them.

so my advise to friends, if you wanted to marry into a family business. think twice…coz it is a very complex relationships with the old and junior in the family.

[singmathstutor]

Dear Ningning, agree that a family doing a family biz may be complicated. Perhaps, everyone not only wants to meddle things in the office but at home as well. I'm someone with that kind of experience, although not any more. I always tried to shield my wife from all the squabbles and unnecessary attention. But frankly, it's not easy. Ican understand your hubby's difficult position.


However, I'm glad to know that your hubby sticks by you and listens to you regarding issues pertaining to that. That to me, it very crucial. :rahrah:

[ningning]

singmathstutor:

Dear Ningning, agree that a family doing a family biz may be complicated. Perhaps, everyone not only wants to meddle things in the office but at home as well. I'm someone with that kind of experience, although not any more. I always tried to shield my wife from all the squabbles and unnecessary attention. But frankly, it's not easy. Ican understand your hubby's difficult position.


However, I'm glad to know that your hubby sticks by you and listens to you regarding issues pertaining to that. That to me, it very crucial. :rahrah:

i cried when i read what you had posted. I cried is becoz your words really touch my inner feeling. Its a simple and short reply. But it really summarized how me and my Dh felt all these while.

I am really glad that kiasuparents have this corner for me to let out my grievances and have ppl to understand how i feel. It makes me warm. Thank you all here. :thankyou:

[just888]

It seems like problem is always encounter with woman married into a wealth family. Wondering if there is in-law problem when of guy married a rich man’s daughter?