In-law problems?
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Every year, someone (same person) will lecture my children and I about chopstick etiquette. My kids hold their chopsticks oddly. After a while, I realised that the person was just making conversation. Good thing for my kids that they just smile and giggle and nod… Then in the car they’ll say "We got the chopstick lecture again." Last year, on the way there, they said "We’re looking forward to the chopstick lecture, kekekekekekeke!"
Naughty kids!!
It gives people something to talk about, and old people cannot quite remember that they already said something last year and every year for the past 8 years. -
For me this year, well we will travel for the whole full week. By the time we return from holiday, everyone has resume work liao…hee hee. cos we got so much "bad blood" with PILs, SILs so we tot of why not go for holiday instead to see those evils. dun care whether PIl happy or not, I no longer placed their emotion on my agenda anymore.
Anyway according to my past experiences, whenever i am there, i were not suppose to talk coz they will all open their"ears" wide and "record" whatever i said and either correct what i say or will pretend not to hear me. and after i left, i knew they will critise and will start to "decipher" whatever i said into something "evil". so i always keep mum especially so if that unmarrried SIL is around. sigh…they are all too free liao…got maid at home, got slightly above average income, private home, somemore no family committments (single SIL), life is sweet to them, so i suppose by gossip about me really spice up their life. Anyway we knew, we will not be "missed" by PILS, my MIL asked my DH in a very loud frustrated tone "coming for dinner"? sigh…since PILs are always biased against us, even we go dinner is only my "phyical is there". "soul is out somewhere else" . Theres no words spoken at the table, everyone just black face througout, the ambience is very "cold". WHERE GOT MEANING LIKE THAT FOR REUNION DINNER? My SIL will put all those expensive food not within my reachable distance and put those ytd food infront of me. so childish. Usually i will just quickly finish my meal and sit to stare at the tv blankly (they are the long life taiwan drama supporters). Any minute spent there, seem like a life time to me. Can anyone understand how torture it is?
This year we chosed to stay away from these TROUBLE MARKERS. Hurray!!! When i am back, my mum and sister will cook a good meal for us as reunion dinner, though not much fancy food but it is the tots thats counts and we are family, theres no stress to talk about anything we like. we dun "record" and "decipher" what ones says at the table. -
Yesterday, my mum came up with a brilliant idea. Since my SIL will not be around for reunion dinner, why not invite my PIL over instead? So I invited my PIL and they have agreed to come to our family’s reunion dinner. Hurray!
So now we have a new and exciting focus. Rather than feeling bad about the missing SIL and niece, my mum took the opportunity to host my PILs instead! My PIL and parents have not met for a couple of years already hence it is a good opportunity to catch up while my father’s health is now stable and my PILs are in good health and still mobile too.
Happy! -
phew... reunion dinner with in-laws over liao... I kept quiet and everyone also kept to themselves. Thank God! It was the coldest dinner I ever had... but at least no need to throw darts and arrows
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ningning:
For me this year, well we will travel for the whole full week. By the time we return from holiday, everyone has resume work liao....hee hee. cos we got so much \"bad blood\" with PILs, SILs so we tot of why not go for holiday instead to see those evils. dun care whether PIl happy or not, I no longer placed their emotion on my agenda anymore.
Anyway according to my past experiences, whenever i am there, i were not suppose to talk coz they will all open their\"ears\" wide and \"record\" whatever i said and either correct what i say or will pretend not to hear me. and after i left, i knew they will critise and will start to \"decipher\" whatever i said into something \"evil\". so i always keep mum especially so if that unmarrried SIL is around. sigh...they are all too free liao.......got maid at home, got slightly above average income, private home, somemore no family committments (single SIL), life is sweet to them, so i suppose by gossip about me really spice up their life. Anyway we knew, we will not be \"missed\" by PILS, my MIL asked my DH in a very loud frustrated tone \"coming for dinner\"? sigh.........since PILs are always biased against us, even we go dinner is only my \"phyical is there\". \"soul is out somewhere else\" . Theres no words spoken at the table, everyone just black face througout, the ambience is very \"cold\". WHERE GOT MEANING LIKE THAT FOR REUNION DINNER? My SIL will put all those expensive food not within my reachable distance and put those ytd food infront of me. so childish. Usually i will just quickly finish my meal and sit to stare at the tv blankly (they are the long life taiwan drama supporters). Any minute spent there, seem like a life time to me. Can anyone understand how torture it is?
This year we chosed to stay away from these TROUBLE MARKERS. Hurray!!! When i am back, my mum and sister will cook a good meal for us as reunion dinner, though not much fancy food but it is the tots thats counts and we are family, theres no stress to talk about anything we like. we dun \"record\" and \"decipher\" what ones says at the table.
Ningning, I perfectly understand. Actually you should have gone on CNY trips long ago ever since all this nonsense started. We are off somewhere every year for the last ??? years. Tomorrow we are heading off early in the morning. It's the escape trip! -
I do not understand why yr mum is complaining. At least she leave yr brother behind to attend the reunion dinner, doesnt she ?Doesnt the woman's family count ? Dont the woman's family wants a \"complete\" reunion? Is woman a lesser person once she is married ? 将心比心， i would want a reunion dinner with my 娘家 every year (together with the husband and kids) if i am already seeing the inlaws most of the other 365 days.
DesertWind:
No matter what, do not purposely miss a reunion dinner just to make a statement. It is very discouraging and disheartening for the parents/ILs/siblings/rest of the family. No matter what the problem/issues are, surely no problem is big enough to warrant missing the Big Reunion and make the gathering incomplete?
This year my SIL has traveled back to China with my niece leaving my brother and nephew behind to attend the reunion dinner with us. This would be the second time in about 8 years of marriage that she traveled back to her hometown and reunion with her family. My mother complain bitterly about my SIL but then now that she missed the family reunion, even I don't feel good about it because family is not \"complete\". Of course we all will take it in our stride like good adults despite our hearts not feeling good. Of course without her our family is still \"complete\" because my brother is with us. But then the fact that my brother is already married and his wife not there is what makes the difference see?
Sure we understand she too miss her family and she has not been back for about 4 years already. But the manner that she took off ie. did not even apologise for not being around during CNY and not even saying good bye properly is what pissed my mum off. Anyway, this too, we will take it in our stride because CNY is but what... 2 weeks at best? But still have the rest of the year to see and to get along with each other.
Take it easy lah! Enjoy, be happy, eat more, lo hei more, get money more more OK?
Gong Xi Fa Chai! -
Had reunion dinner with hubby’s family yesterday. Having reunion with my parents tonight. Mother in law will be home alone so my daddy asked her to join us.
I was busy in the kitchen and mil came over and started bossing me about how I should "do" my chores. So I am here now shufing the net and leaving the chores to her now since she enjoys doing them… -
Alamak, my mil called my son her fave grandson’s name twice! Once at the reunion dinner and once at the bainian on first day of CNY. My son is older and has been with them very often so I don’t understand how she could replace my son’s name with that of a 2yo… except to say now I have proof that she shows favouritism!
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cherrygal:
Alamak, my mil called my son her fave grandson's name twice! Once at the reunion dinner and once at the bainian on first day of CNY. My son is older and has been with them very often so I don't understand how she could replace my son's name with that of a 2yo... except to say now I have proof that she shows favouritism!
Sign of old age/dementia perhaps?
Last time my grandfather could not recall who I was & one time when I brought my kids back to Malaysia to visit him, he refused to believe me....thinking I was joking as he insisted I'm still a young gal ie.only 18yo. -
Very happy. Just :siam: a lunch at mil's relative. Just sent my hubby & kids while I stayed home. Know mil not very pleased, but last year experience it was torturing. That place was totally filled & tho the festive mood is there, it's so noisy that I end up with headache. Tho i will miss out on the sumptuous meal, am totally satisfied with my instant noodles & enjoying peace & quietness. Mil will not be working this week, now gotta plan activities so that I dun have to face her whole day for next 3 days.
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