Teach Less, Learn More

[janet88]

HI Chenonceau,

That’s why there is this phrase ‘mummy’s boy’…I am guilty of that too. Idiotic FT. How would she feel if her kids were told to shut up by their teachers ? Bet she will complain all the way. :x

[rocklee]

In the past, I don’t believe in pre-teaching my kids, in particular Maths, for two reasons. Firstly, it is the child’s responsibility to sit up and pay attention in class and ask the teacher if he is unclear. Secondly, I am afraid what I teach may be different from the teacher and thus will confuse the child more. So I only guide my child whenever there is a need. I don’t really check his homework as I am fine with mistakes as long as he learns from them. This method worked fine from P1 to P3. Son did not achieve excellent results as in above 90. But I am satisfied that he stayed in the range of the 80s.


This year, son was allocated to a high band class with a lot of high flyers. Form Teacher was very result-oriented. Naturally son suffers a lot under her care as she expects all subjects to be band 1. So when son didn’t do very well (by her standard) during a class test for Maths, he was shamed in front of the whole class. FT will also constantly remind son that his work is getting worse. FT teacher threatened to drop him out of the class if he does not improve or she will inform mummy. Son felt hurt and lost confidence in the subject. This negative effect spilled over to English and Science as the same teacher is teaching. I went through his previous work and ruled out the fact that he did not pay attention in class as most of the past worksheets, he was able to complete without much problem. He handed in all his homework on time. So I could only conclude that he did not understand the topic well because even after he did his corrections and I tested him again, he did not understand. As FT was not approachable, son dared not ask questions for fear he would be embarrassed again. To make matter worse, his classmates weren’t helpful. Whenever, he asked them for help, they either gave him a frown or asked him to shut up. As a result, he made even more mistakes. However, FT would only remind him how many mistakes he had made instead of finding out why he made the mistakes. Son is not a slow learner, neither is he a quick learner. He just needs a little time for topics that he is unfamiliar with and a few more practices. Unfortunately, FT does not allow him this extra learning time and simply judge him as a poor learner. As a matter of fact, I met the FT during the PTC. She mumbled to herself throughout the meeting and I wondered how son could hear what she taught during class? After discussing with him, we decided that we could no longer rely on the teacher, we just have to “kao zi ji”.

So here I am, pre-teaching him the topics ahead of the teacher so that he has more time to digest and can understand the topics better when teacher teaches. So far I think he has improved his understanding and made less mistakes. I am fine if one day the teacher decided to drop him out of this class. To me, having a patient and caring teacher is far more important than being in a top class. It is also important that a child mustn’t lose confidence in what he is doing. That is why parent support plays an important role in our children’s education.

I hope parents here do not get unduly stressed if your child did not do well in CAs or SAs. Most importantly is to analyse the WHY and then work on the HOW to improve. What is done cannot be undone and it is a waste of time if one keeps dwelling on it. We all have to be positive looking so that our children can have the will and confidence to excel.

All the best to parents and kids for the upcoming SAs!

[janet88]

rocklee:

Firstly, it is the child’s responsibility to sit up and pay attention in class and ask the teacher if he is unclear. Secondly, I am afraid what I teach may be different from the teacher and thus will confuse the child more. So I only guide my child whenever there is a need. I don’t really check his homework as I am fine with mistakes as long as he learns from them. This method worked fine from P1 to P3. Son did not achieve excellent results as in above 90. But I am satisfied that he stayed in the range of the 80s.

I think the same way...I told hubby we shouldn't teach in advance so that son will listen to the teacher in class and not be over-confident bcos he has been taught at home. I don't correct son's mistakes, let him make mistakes and then do corrections. No point getting everything correct when it's actually the parents' work.


As FT was not approachable, son dared not ask questions for fear he would be embarrassed again.
As a matter of fact, I met the FT during the PTC. She mumbled to herself throughout the meeting and I wondered how son could hear what she taught during class? After discussing with him, we decided that we could no longer rely on the teacher, we just have to “kao zi ji”.
We cannot depend on teachers now, but depend on ourselves to coach. I'm very disappointed with school teachers now. She is not approachable and tells students to 'shut up'.

[PrincessDad]

insider:

Chenonceau:

You have switched focus again? Were you not talking about demanding A and A* from our kids - and therein lies our difference? Now, you are talking about our demands of teachers?

It is not the same thing, you know.

What's the 'again' there for?

Parents demand A/A+ and expect schools to cover all that will come up in a test / exam, ideally kids don't need to go tuition or require home coaching - the utopian situation.

In order for the school to cover ALL, then ideally teachers should have IEP - another utopian situation.

That's the way I linked the 'demand' which to you maybe unrelated but to me it is.

[quote]
Standing from the side and viewing this thread, I can tell insider totally has no agenda as he is not specific in the terms he use. What you mean by 'Regular' kids? What sort of abilities should a regular kid possess then? don't just give vague terms, be more specific...anything vague are just words and thoughts, no real actions...also, what you mean by 'effortless'? does it mean sitting there and do nothing? be more specific...if you cannot be specific, that shows you are not sure of what you are talking about...and why bring such big word ('Utopian') into such a simple to understand thread....which is by the way just discussing on whether schools are teaching lesser than required...why so hung up with ideaology that you totally oblivious to the true intention of this thread.

[/quote]

[cantbearit2]

Chenonceau:

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeze dun waste time reading it. It wasn't at all educational or helpful to anyone... and I made an undignified spectacle of myself right through. The only thing I am proud of was the apology and that was at the end. I should actually have apologized earlier.

Now, can we go back to goofing around? I need to goof around with someone 'cos I am still stressed by SA1.

The brighter side of things though... is that I have made it to Brown Belt. That's a little closer to Grandmaster :lol: .

aiyo,chenonceau,
U din made a spectacle of yourself lah. U R juz expressing yur personal view selflessly. U din not ridicule other parents nor did u put a name to other pple's parenting style. Neither did u insist we have 2 follow yur way cos yur way is e only way of ensuring our kids pass their exams in sch. I love reading your posts.

Yur personal experience may act as a warning to some parents who still tink tat sch will teach our children everythg they need to pass (for some parents, mayb geniunely it's a given but let's not jump to e conclusion tat all child r e same). If tat's e case, parents will not need to coach at all (at least during my era, my parent was not able to coach me AT ALL, but I manage to pass wif decent results).

For parents who have similar experience, it is comforting to noe u R not alone. For parents like me who have not reached tat stage yet, we may be forewarn of such happenings.

I believe as in all forums, we shld always look at the postings wif a pinch of salt & decide for yourself if there's anythg learnt fr other pple's experience. I do not believe parents will follow others' way of executing in their whole entirety cos similar to children, no 2 set of parents R e same. We tend to modify along e way depending on e situation. Thus e chinese saying 因材施教 mah.

So no worries, u R not creating a panic streak in parents in tis forum. Like u, I still do family time wif my DDs doing other great stuff (other than academic stuff).

Pls do not feel apologetic cos otherwise aft reading tis thread, no one will dare speak their mind liao. Having said tat, pls do not misunderstand tat it equates speaking irresponsibly (there's a difference )

On a lighter note, wats e advantage of being grandmaster huh??? Paisay, I nv really gif it much tot till u bring it up. :oops:

[cantbearit2]

rocklee:

This year, son was allocated to a high band class with a lot of high flyers. Form Teacher was very result-oriented. Naturally son suffers a lot under her care as she expects all subjects to be band 1. So when son didn’t do very well (by her standard) during a class test for Maths, he was shamed in front of the whole class. FT will also constantly remind son that his work is getting worse. FT teacher threatened to drop him out of the class if he does not improve or she will inform mummy.

tis FT should b :spank: I dun mind my DD being avg in studies but i wan her to grow up being confident of herself. Wif T like tat, how 2 instill confidence??? :x

[rocklee]

Hi Janet


I can understand how you feel. Sometimes it is just our luck to have this kind of teacher. It is simply impossible to have good teachers throughout the six years. Since we can't change the environment to suit us, then we have to change ourselves to suit the environment lor.

Even though I disapprove of the teacher's approach, I do not paint a negative picture of her in front of son cos he still has to face her for the rest of the year. So I would have to \"speak up\" for her so that son will not feel resentful each day atttending her class. I told son that teacher \"cared\" enough to point out his mistake and her purpose was to let them achieve better results blah blah blah... So my role would have to make him feel more at ease with her so that life will be easier.

In my case, I think pre-teaching has its merits. As the child progresses to upp primary, the level of difficulty increases not gradually but sharply. Hence, considering he is not a fast learner, he would definitely need more time to digest, absorb and practise.

Hope you don't get too upset. If you feel you are too stressed out, it is time to take a break. Have a kit kat! haha

[cantbearit2]

janet_lee88:

rocklee:

Firstly, it is the child’s responsibility to sit up and pay attention in class and ask the teacher if he is unclear. Secondly, I am afraid what I teach may be different from the teacher and thus will confuse the child more. So I only guide my child whenever there is a need. I don’t really check his homework as I am fine with mistakes as long as he learns from them. This method worked fine from P1 to P3. Son did not achieve excellent results as in above 90. But I am satisfied that he stayed in the range of the 80s.

I think the same way...I told hubby we shouldn't teach in advance so that son will listen to the teacher in class and not be over-confident bcos he has been taught at home. I don't correct son's mistakes, let him make mistakes and then do corrections. No point getting everything correct when it's actually the parents' work.


As FT was not approachable, son dared not ask questions for fear he would be embarrassed again.
As a matter of fact, I met the FT during the PTC. She mumbled to herself throughout the meeting and I wondered how son could hear what she taught during class? After discussing with him, we decided that we could no longer rely on the teacher, we just have to “kao zi ji”.
We cannot depend on teachers now, but depend on ourselves to coach. I'm very disappointed with school teachers now. She is not approachable and tells students to 'shut up'.

'shut up'??? e teachers nowadays v stress izzit??? Tis comes as a surprise to me. I thot as educators, ey shld noe better than to mouth words like these. my days, ey juz tell us:\"class pls be quiet\"

[cantbearit2]

Funx3:

Yeah, Think Our Kids R Quite \"Auto\" Already.
My Gal's Maths Drop from 80's to High 60's from P5 SA2 to P6 CA1.
But that's OK, as Long as She put in her Best Effort.

Can See that the Sch is already loading them with many Revision Exercises, Apart from teaching New Topics this Term. Am Sure She can Pull Her Socks up ....

I Only Provide Guidance, upon her Request.
I Don't See Anything Wrong in my Gal Getting A Few Big X on her Practice Papers, or HW.
Afterall, to Me, This is Part and Parcel of Learning in School ....
Make A Few Mistakes Here and There, Learn Why Got it Wrong, Do the Correction ....
That's How We Parents learnt in the PAST, Too, Right?

:goodpost:

[cantbearit2]

Chenonceau:

chamonix:

I'm trying very hard to keep my post counts down so that I won't hit the GM status. Maid or Chief, can transfer my post counts to Chenonceau? Please?

Hah? Why? There is something about GM status that I dunno about? Like maybe... more responsibility? I'm allergic to responsibility.

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: u R so funny!!!