Children Suicide Cases
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tamarind:
Hey, :goodpost: :rahrah:
I absolutely agree. It is perfectly fine for parents to do whatever they want to their kids, so long as they keep it to themselves.insider:
But always 萝卜青菜,各有所爱啦,大家爱怎么教孩子就怎么教孩子!
However, in this days of the internet, it is easy for some parents to influence others and spread all the wrong ideas about how children should learn. For example, proclaiming that there is no fun way to learn Chinese and the only way to be good at it is to spend many hours memorizing model compositions which are all nonsense . Just imagine if many other parents force their kids to do the same, how many kids will end up in depression ? Then in the end parents blame the problem on the education system, when in fact they should blame themselves.
My mother has always been a role model to me. She never had to force or threaten us to study. She also never told us how many marks we should get, or what schools we should go to. My brother achieved academic success that no parents here dare to dream about. In that year when he graduated, he was the top scholar among Singaporean students who attended the university of Cambridge on government scholarships. He had no tuition, no enrichment, and no stress !
I don't believe that our education system is different now. The only difference is that parents now are so much more kiasu, and they will do anything to force their kids into the top schools, even though their kids are not academically inclined, and this may be disastrous.
Personally, while I think the education system is not vastly different now and then, I do find that the standard/level of difficulty is much higher.....partly a natural progression since more of us are educated, but more so because we parents are a lot more kiasu, more focused and do a LOT LOT more to push the kids. I kinda pity kids these days but unless the parents' mindset changes, I doubt there's any solution.
Talking about influence, it's definitely hard to resist and gnaws subconsciously at us. I tend to be more relax (lazy lah....haha) but whenever I see my friends/neighbour putting many hours and effort tutoring their kids, I feel guilty & must also sit my kids down to study. See others reading all the cheem cheem stuff, must try to get my kids to read too.....see others attend this & that, I start enquiring too. Seriously, must really be confident & strong to resist all these influence from all angles
:scared:
DH also more relax type, but whenever he hears about who and who spend so many hours studying, able to do this and that & come home only to see our kids playing/watching TV, he will unconsciously question me and start complaining our kids are playing too much.......but normally, he subscribe to the need to strike a balance between study & play.... -
BeContented:
I actually enjoy seeing the look on other people's face when I told them that my kids do not have any tuition.
Hey, :goodpost: :rahrah:
Personally, while I think the education system is not vastly different now and then, I do find that the standard/level of difficulty is much higher.....partly a natural progression since more of us are educated, but more so because we parents are a lot more kiasu, more focused and do a LOT LOT more to push the kids. I kinda pity kids these days but unless the parents' mindset changes, I doubt there's any solution.
Talking about influence, it's definitely hard to resist and gnaws subconsciously at us. I tend to be more relax (lazy lah....haha) but whenever I see my friends/neighbour putting many hours and effort tutoring their kids, I feel guilty & must also sit my kids down to study. See others reading all the cheem cheem stuff, must try to get my kids to read too.....see others attend this & that, I start enquiring too. Seriously, must really be confident & strong to resist all these influence from all angles
:scared:
DH also more relax type, but whenever he hears about who and who spend so many hours studying, able to do this and that & come home only to see our kids playing/watching TV, he will unconsciously question me and start complaining our kids are playing too much.......but normally, he subscribe to the need to strike a balance between study & play....
The only enrichment they have is swimming.
Positive influence is good. For example, if we learn about a more efficient method of teaching a subject, or good teaching materials, then it is fine to follow others and do the same thing.
However, if parents want to push their kids to do well because all their friends' kids are in GEP, or all their friends' kids go into the top secondary school, then it is going to be very stressful for the child because he may not have the ability to do so.
Quote from Steve Jobs:
\"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.\"
The problem with parents in Singapore is that many are trying to make their kids live someone else's life, NOT the life the their kids want to live. -
High five, Tamarind
My kids also do not have tuition. One kid does very well, one rather poorly, one in between. Same parenting style for all, seems to me mostly natural endowment that determines how well they do. The one who is doing well has outdone peers who had higher PSLE scores, perhaps those others had tuition before, but now with more subjects and humanities subjects thrown in, tuition is less of an option. Eventually, at higher levels, they have to do it on their own anyway. However, I think good tuition teachers who can stir up a passion for learning a subject could be worth it (for that matter, the motivators/ mentors can be grandparents instead- one girl in a below average class who topped her year in EL attributed her success to her grandfather's influence). -
Hi parents, yes, it is always very sad to hear about suicide cases. My boys are going to Pri 1 soon, and I most certainly do not want them to feel the pressure from school.
Actually, what is more sad is that in most cases, one can actually tell whether the child has suicidal tendencies or not, just by looking at their date of birth. However, often, most parents are not aware of this fact, and because of our busy schedule, we let things slowly build up to the point where it is too late for us to do anything.
For interested parents who want to know more about profiling their children based on their date of birth, please message me for further details. Thank you. -
CHICC Profiling:
Are u a fortune teller ?
For interested parents who want to know more about profiling their children based on their date of birth, please message me for further details. Thank you. -
Hi Just4Fun
No, I am not a fortune teller!.
We actually offer character profiling services for children, just based on their date of birth. This is purely based on statistics, based on numerous reading done of many people from all walks of life.
Research has shown the child’s CHARACTER does not change. There is a difference between inborn character (nature, which does not change), and nurture (nurtured traits, behaviour and personality). We are trying to let parents understand the "nature" of their children, so that they can maximize the "nurture" in their parenting style.
For interested parents, please email me your child’s Name, Gender and DOB, and I can provide you a FREE basic analysis report of your child. Cheers! -
CHICC Profiling:
Name & Gender also affect the result? I once read an article somewhere that says babies delivered by cesarean & especially boys have lower stress tolerance. That kind of make me :nailbite: as my DS was delivered by cesarean due to emergency.Hi Just4Fun
No, I am not a fortune teller!.
We actually offer character profiling services for children, just based on their date of birth. This is purely based on statistics, based on numerous reading done of many people from all walks of life.
Research has shown the child's CHARACTER does not change. There is a difference between inborn character (nature, which does not change), and nurture (nurtured traits, behaviour and personality). We are trying to let parents understand the \"nature\" of their children, so that they can maximize the \"nurture\" in their parenting style.
For interested parents, please email me your child's Name, Gender and DOB, and I can provide you a FREE basic analysis report of your child. Cheers! -
Flowermonaster:
Name & Gender also affect the result? I once read an article somewhere that says babies delivered by cesarean & especially boys have lower stress tolerance. That kind of make me :nailbite: as my DS was delivered by cesarean due to emergency.
My 2 boys are delivered via elective c-section, shld I :nailbite: too
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Jennifer:
:evil:Flowermonaster:
Name & Gender also affect the result? I once read an article somewhere that says babies delivered by cesarean & especially boys have lower stress tolerance. That kind of make me :nailbite: as my DS was delivered by cesarean due to emergency.
My 2 boys are delivered via elective c-section, shld I :nailbite: too
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Hi
I also gave birth via elective c-sections. For normal delivery, DOB analysis is more accurate, as those are natural birth (baby chooses to come out at that particular time). For elective, most of the time, we would have chosen a ‘good’ date and time. What this means is that the baby may or may not be able to ‘carry’ the weight of such an auspicious time. So parents have to monitor the child as he grows.
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