I choose to sleep whenever I want with my parents. This applies only to the weekends, public holidays’ eve and school holidays. Sometimes its me and my mother, me and my mother or me and either one of my sisters. Us five all sleep in the same room once in a while. Two on the king bed, three on mattresses (not the makeshift ones, though…)


Why I somtimes sleep with my parents? Honestly, its simply to bond. I could sleep perfectly fine on my own, but I love them alot. Seriously.

Chenonceau:

My son in primary school is in bed by 8.30. All homework done. My daughter (now in JC) also was able to do that in primary school.


Come secondary school, it is terribly difficult to do that. Sleeping 3hrs a night is frequent. Things got so bad that I remonstrated with the school. The school responded that it was possibly (1) surfing (2) youtube and (3) Facebook.

Since I am very much in touch with my daughter's life, I know it isn't these 3. It's a combination of (1) every teacher giving homework without co-ordinating with other teachers (2) CCA and (3) extra-curricular opportunities such as Model United Nations, research opportunities with Profs, essay competitions etc...

By secondary school, kids are less obedient and when a child is driven to perform, she will push her body's limits. It comes from too successful academic parenting in primary school. A child that is used to performing in primary school won't tolerate losing out later either.

I tried grounding, caning, scolding... nothing worked.

I again had to remonstrate with the school when she landed in hospital with pneumonia which developed from a simple flu that a good night's sleep would have overcome. Since she slept poorly for 2 months, she never got well. The school finally gave her reprieve from holiday homework. I locked up her laptop for 1 month.

She was more careful after that.

The kids definitely don't have enough sleep in secondary school. Definitely.

It is understandable but as a twelve-year-old in secondary school that sleeps at ten and wakes up at seven, I disagree with your last statement. Indeed sufficient sleep is needed for a healthy and energetic mind.

Chenonceau:

I would tend to disagree with the premise that the Chinese style of educating students cannot produce innovation and creativity.


I think that the Asian cultures do not reward/fete/celebrate/recognise highly creative people. These are considered disobedient rebels who bring dishonour.

I grew up in Singapore with parents who demanded everything. I did the housework before I went to school, carried the groceries, helped with dishes and the clothes. I wasn't allowed to even go out for movies (nor drink soft drinks... and had to eat EXACTLY what mom asked me to eat) so you can forget about playdates and sleepovers. And yes... my report card needed to be perfect or I would get caned.

Well... my report card was not perfect when I got to my teens. Just for the heck of it, I chose to be caned instead. And if being caned was the price of freedom, then sh** I was happy to be caned. I did everything I was not supposed to do. When I realised that I wasn't allowed phone calls from boys, I asked all my friends to get their brothers to call me at home... I was Chinese Child from Hell.

Nonetheless, I eventually managed to get my PhD... and I remember that in my 1st year, a renowned Israeli researcher researching in the field of creativity came to give guest lectures to the PhD students. There were 6 people in that lecture, and we did a series of creativity tests.

I was the only Singaporean there. My scores were not only the highest in that group, the 2nd guy was really far behind. He was German, and somewhat of a rebel himself, except that his parents respected his rebelliousness and didn't fight him. Mine fought me every step of the way.

Is it not possible that when you work a muscle you strengthen it? And hence, when a child prone to creativity hits road blocks all the time from parents he/she hones that potential for creativity? I am older now and more able to control my reflexes to do the opposite of what is accepted... to find odd ways of looking at problems... and to try it out just for the heck of it.

But people like me don't succeed in cultures where a collective identity is prized. To rise up the organisation, you need to obey rules. This is something I have often found difficult to do. Things are better now that I am older.

Many many ground-breaking researchers today (in USA) are Chinese (Amy Chua's father was one such). Research requires creativity even if you're doing average quality stuff. To achieve recognition amongst researchers, needs a lot of creativity indeed. One of the founders of Yahoo was Chinese, rebel son of immigrant parents.

Amy Chua (herself a researcher) demonstrates a lot of creativity. Her writing is evocative and holds a sense of drama that twists in your guts. Otherwise, why do we react to her book with so much emotion? Even her threats are creative. And she is creative enough to even put out the book. It's a simple thing to do to make a lotta money but you gotta think of it first and pitch it right. She dared what other Chinese parents dared not. She did what others would NEVER think of doing. That's part of being creative. Elvis Presley dared to take black music and make it white. Black music had always been there. Adopting and adapting it was possible for every musician. Only Elvis thought of doing it in a big way. The difference is, you do that in USA, you are idolized. You do that in China, you are ostracized.

Even Amy's threats were creative... though no one can beat my friend's mom who told her grandson that she would put him in the toilet bowl and flush him away. Even I was horrified 'cos my mom was no where near that creative when it came to threats. Haha!

Ballet dancer Li Cunxin danced with the Houston Ballet for sixteen years. They moved to Melbourne with their two children where Li became a principal dancer with the Australian Ballet. Li was one of the world's best in his time. Ballet is a creative effort. Yet, Li grew up in China and was trained in a horribly repressive way in a school where the Amy Chua styles was institutionalized. Watch \"Mao's Last Dancer\" to understand.

I don't think Amy Chua's methods kill creativity. If anything, I think it hones a child's potential for creativity because it invites and strengthens the child's will to rebel and do things her way... differently. That's Lulu. I'm willing to bet that if anyone tested Lulu for creativity, her scores, like mine, would be off the charts.

The only thing though... is that you never HEAR of famous creative people in China because such souls aren't feted nor celebrated. Gee... you're not supposed to idolise such people. Art to the Chinese are time-honoured traditions. You learn an ancient art form. You don't create your own Elvis Presley style. You don't hear of such people in China (because they are social outcasts) but that doesn't mean the system does not produce them.

I don't want my kids to be creative. Creativity is a burden and a curse. I want my kids to blend into the world they belong to and be good enough to live a comfortable life where they have enough to eat, a nice home and people to love. I vaguely remember that the Japanese have a saying \"A beautiful flower that sticks out in a field of grass, gets its head chopped off\".

Western eyes trained on Asian cultures cannot but achieve a distorted view. One should not interpret the ways and social mores of Asian cultures using Western values. it becomes too easy to simplistically draw negative judgment.

Nobody talks about 4000 years of Western history though in actual fact, Western history is old... very very old. Westerners simply don't see that as important. Chinese people are ALWAY talking about those few thousand years (ad nauseum). This is because the Chinese think it is important to stay true to history. This means there is great respect for the old way of doing things. Hence, young upstarts (creative no doubt) are pooh poohed. Hence, artistes feted in China are kungfu artistes (long tradition), face mask changers (again long tradition), xiang shen (again long tradition). No Elvis.

Similarly, if you examine the personalities of the Chinese leaders, you won't find fiery Churchills nor charismatic Obamas. You find personable people who look bland. These people don't stick out, and therefore their heads don't get chopped off.

Anyway, this is an interesting topic... and it was fun to write this post. just for the heck of it! Haha!

Wait, I am confused. Are you saying that creativity is good or that creativity is bad?

In my opinion, creativity is obviously good. Creative people is what makes this world this world. Chinese are obviously creative, or there wouldn't be Chinese paintings or pottery. I agree, some of the Chinese leaders are bland, but still sometimes get themselves killed, or receive controversy. Heck, this website was created out of creativity!

Being creative is obviously not like gambling. If one is bland, his/her head may not get chopped off, but he/she will get a horrible, meaningless and apathetic life. If one is creative, even if he/she has their head chopped off, their life was worthwhile and they won't regret it.

Creativity defines invention. Creativity is a pillar of the human spirit. Should creativity be lost, all hope is gone and we would be like sloths in the jungle.

toddles:

Alex001:

My Lord! I have never seen such strict parenting skills. Not attending a sleepover is fine, not playing computer games is okay, but not following their passion? I am twelve and I understand that the mother here wants to discipline her children well, but if she restricts her children to this extent, I believe that she has gone too far.


I agree with almost all her points, but depending on what the child is doing on the computer. Why not allow her children to be in a school play? So they \"won't be actors\" and lead \"horrible lives\"? Well, excuse me Amy Chua, but your dystopian rule over your children has gone too far. A revolution is necessary.

This is ridiculous. If the child could surf the web for reading on information, play another instrument other than a piano or violin, and choose their own extracurricular activities, then I'm fine. But she disallows all these. What is this hybrid regime? Is the mum trying to act 'superior'? I really feel like filing a lawsuit against her, for mistreatment of child, verbal assault and restrictions of freedom.

I am ashamed. Strict upbringing of a child is good. I would happily agree to do my homework, not watch television, let alone even play computer games. But I am simply shocked at the lines \"Or you'll have NO food\". Caning is fine, but no food?

I would continously reiterate this point - mothers must be strict, but allow their children to do what they want. I would love to see Amy Chua playing the piano for seven hours straight. I am a pacifist but I'd dearly wish for this brutal torture to be applied on HER. Her parents' upbringing of her should not affect her own upbringing of her children. Shocking, disheartening; does she even give a care for her children's passion?\"

At the least she must give her children one day off. Just a day, is that a lot to ask? She even has a comic on her character. I agree, children MUST get As. I myself targeted for As and got them true hard work. I'm having the angry vibes here, and I'm not going to stand this mistreatment of children.

Final verdict - give a day off, or GET YOUR OWN PUNISHMENT, Miss. Chua!

Sweetheart,

you must read through the rest of the links (her video on CNN, her actual bk if you're interested, her daughter's letter) to get a more balanced view.

when i read the first article she wrote, I reacted pretty much the same as you. But you'll soon realise that that's not the whole story.

She'd probably force herself to sit at the piano 10 hours anyway, that's how driven she herself is.

Indeed, I have already watched the CNN interview, her daughter's post and more right after I posted that comment. If the daughter's passion is disallowed by her mother, then she is deemed a horrible mother. Otherwise, I think she isn't the strictest I've seen. I'm not referencing to my own parents, nor anyone else's, but I am, honestly, able to accept more strict parenting.

Don’t blame Qantas, blame Rolls-Royce for not ensuring safe engines. I took a Qantas A380 recently from London to Singapore and everything was quite good. The engines don’t even seem to have been in an incident.


Its a whole lot better than its competitor, the Boeing 747, which has been in a number of high-profile accidents (don’t worry, its safe).

Tiger Airways has more complaints than the other two. It also seems like almost all their planes are empty, with only three to five seats occupied out of a hundred. Shocking.

Children are not selfish, they simply want to show their authority over the others. It may also be because they are kiasu and fear that he/she might do something to their thing.


I myself used to be kiasu and was selfish, but now I share almost everything.

I am twelve and I am in Secondary One. I am both young and old at heart. I act like a baby but I am quite nostalgic.

Cruise Critic also states that MSC Cruises ships mostly rank around the 3.5/5 range, which is actually in the lower range.

Universal Studios Singapore is seriously overrated. Other than Shrek 4D and Revenge of the Mummy, I can’t see any other good rides. I could spend a better day at Sentosa - riding the MegaZip, going for some 4D action, trying the ClimbMax, watching Songs for the Sea and going for a Gogreen Fun Ride would be more fun and costs around the same.


I can’t even believe that there are duplicates and ridiculous rides (Canopy Flyer, anyone?) over there, compared to its counterparts in Florida and Japan. Such a dissapointment.

Lets hope when Battlestar Galactica and Transformers 4D are installed, USS would be better.