Supporting a child’s results in secondary school is the best when parents posses good and clear expectations with warmth, flexibility, and growing independence for their child. The aim is to help the child take responsibility while knowing that a disappointing grade won’t change how their parents see them. Parents should have this clear for their child Start off with curiosity. Instead of “Why did you score so low?”, try: “How do you feel about this result?" The parent can ask their child what was difficult, and what might help. A poor result can reflect gaps in understanding, study habits, competing demands, or worry. Actively listen before deciding on a solution. Parents can also try to set goals around actions the child can control. This can include for example like “Review mistakes from two maths exercises this week” gives them something concrete to do. Pair a realistic academic goal with a wellbeing goal, such as keeping a regular bedtime or making time for an activity they enjoy. Parents should always try to notice specific progress: “You asked for help when you got stuck” or “Your explanation is clearer this time.” This makes feedback useful without turning every conversation into a judgement about achievement. In this era, being more tactful and delicate with your child is the key. Keep results conversations contained. A short weekly check-in can cover: What went well? What was difficult? What is one adjustment for next week? What help would you like from me? Out of that time, make room for engaging conversations and useful activities unrelated to school. Avoid comparisons with others or benchmarking, threats about the future, or making affection and family time being dependent on grades. If the parent take note that their child becomes persistently distressed, starts avoiding school, or sacrifices sleep to keep up, reduce the immediate demands and communicate their intentions and issues with their teacher or school counsellor. A useful message to repeat is: “Your learning matters, and so do you. We can take your results seriously and work through difficulties together. We will do well together” Sharing my opinion with fellow parents here. Please feel free to share or feedback

As the PSLE draws closer, Many parents find themselves getting increasingly anxious — perhaps even more anxious than their child. For months, family calendar has revolved around revision schedules, tuition classes, practice papers and school examinations. Every weekend seems to disappear into another round of Mathematics problem sums, Science keywords and Chinese oral practice. Parents keep telling their child, “Just do your best,” but deep down, Only they know what they are constantly wondering: Will their best be enough? That is the uncomfortable part of being a Singaporean parent during PSLE season. Numerous parents worry about the questions their child might unexpectedly struggle with. They worry about careless mistakes after months of preparation. They worry that one difficult paper could shake their confidence for the remaining subjects. And, inevitably, The parents also think about the secondary-school choices that will come afterwards. Yet their biggest fear isn’t really the score. It is actually seeing their child become stressed, exhausted or convinced that a number somehow determines their worth. Sometimes parents ask, “How many marks did you get?” before asking, “How was your day?” That makes me wonder whether the parent is contributing to the very pressure that they want to protect their child from. There is also a persistent temptation to compare. Someone else’s child has finished another stack of practice papers. Another parent recommends a new tuition centre. A classmate seems to be scoring consistently well. Suddenly, the parent feels that whatever they are doing feels insufficient. As PSLE approaches, parents are trying to remind themselves that their role isn’t to sit the examination for my child. It is to provide stability when everything around them feels like it is about results. Perhaps the hardest lesson during PSLE isn’t for the children at all. It is for us parents: knowing when to push, when to encourage — and when to simply say, “You’ve prepared. I believe in you.” Dear parents, keep on keeping on

When a child spends hours at a desk but still struggles to remember what they have learned, it is easy to assume they are distracted, unmotivated, or simply not trying hard enough. Yet the problem may not be due to effort at all. They might probably be studying the wrong way. Many of the students i teach rely on familiar methods such as rereading textbooks, highlighting notes, copying information repeatedly, or staring at model answers before an exam. These activities can sometimes feel productive. Unfortunately, feeling familiar with information is not the same as being able to recall and use it independently. A student might read the same chapter three times and think, “I know this.” Then the textbook closes, the test paper appears, and suddenly the answer is nowhere to be found. Stressed… This is where changing the study method can make a significant difference. One useful technique is called active recall. Instead of repeatedly reading information, students try to retrieve it from memory. After studying a topic, for example, they can close their notes and write down everything they remember. Flashcards, self-made quizzes and practice questions can also encourage this kind of retrieval. Another approach is called spaced practice. Rather than cramming an entire topic the night before an exam, students look at it several times over a longer period of time. Short study sessions spread across days or weeks give them repeated opportunities to retrieve and strengthen what they have learned. Students can also benefit from explaining concepts in their own words. Ask your child to teach you what they have just studied. If they can explain a difficult idea simply without constantly referring to their notes, that can reveal whether they genuinely understand it. If they get stuck, they have discovered exactly what needs more attention. Most importantly, parents should be careful about attaching labels such as “lazy” too quickly and conveniently. A child who appears unwilling to study may actually be frustrated because hours of effort have produced disappointing results which is not what they want. When studying repeatedly leads to poor marks, motivation can naturally fall. Simply demanding more hours at the desk may not solve the underlying problem. Hope this helps