In-law problems?

[tree nymph]

:lol:


felt like having therapy session..... with every word...

we are thinking of ways to get out from the house now.... the first step is to buy a place! looking at the prices... may have to bite the bullet and just do it.

[tree nymph]

Funz:

lovekidsverymuch:

My MIL is very interfering types and she interferes on each n every thing bout DH and me and my kids oso... Can u imagine wat kinda clothes my DH should wear oso..

Hahahah. I remember when we were first married, MIL will buy man's handkerchieves and underwear for DH. When she gave it to DH, you should see his face, he definitely wanted to dig a hole and hide in it. I of course did not let such golden opportunities go. He suffered endless teasing from me. :lol:

:whut:

[janet88]

Tree nymph,

I know your FIL is begging you to stay with them, but you need to keep your sanity for a LONG time.

I remember how hubby & I quarrelled frequently early in marriage, BECAUSE of his mother. Never knew there would be such a troublemaker. His mother wants to interfere in EVERYTHING. The worst thing about her, is being 2 faced - demure in front of hubby and a devil behind his back.

[buds]

tree nymph:

Buds,

i didn't get your joke when you put SM....

now i do!

:lol:

I slipped on my budsnana peel! :stupid:
Sollie! :salute:

[buds]

tree nymph:

:lol:


felt like having therapy session..... with every word...

we are thinking of ways to get out from the house now.... the first step is to buy a place! looking at the prices... may have to bite the bullet and just do it.

I totally feel so to.

[buds]

tree nymph:

:whut:

I join oso, tree nymph!

Here's a BIG :whut:

Yes, yes... never let such golden opportunities slip by! :rotflmao:

[buds]

janet_lee88:

Tree nymph,

I know your FIL is begging you to stay with them, but you need to keep your sanity for a LONG time.

Tree nymph, in my case... it's MIL herself who keeps whining about not
moving an inch outside this house. She will sigh and lament aloud how
unhappy she would be if she had to live with SIL. And she sorta coerce
me to take sides with her of course, that i should know how straight-
forward SIL can be towards her and how she dislikes her ways...
I will pity her... and also wonder how she'll cope there. And then
she goes round making me feel miserable again. Each time the
issue of house sale comes up, she'll come up with some drama.
Just to make us feel bad. Then she'll be nice for awhile and back
again to her usual self.

janet_lee88:

I remember how hubby & I quarrelled frequently early in marriage, BECAUSE of his mother. Never knew there would be such a troublemaker. His mother wants to interfere in EVERYTHING. The worst thing about her, is being 2 faced - demure in front of hubby and a devil behind his back.

I have been there janet_lee88... and not done with it yet.
Still at it. Sigh....

[Funz]

tree nymph:

Funz:

Hahahah. I remember when we were first married, MIL will buy man's handkerchieves and underwear for DH. When she gave it to DH, you should see his face, he definitely wanted to dig a hole and hide in it. I of course did not let such golden opportunities go. He suffered endless teasing from me. :lol:

:whut:

Well, I have my fair share of difficulties with MIL too. Just that for me, we do not live together so I can see the lighter side of things.

When we were dating and when DH brought me to his house, his mum will pour 1 cup of tea when we arrive at the house, for DH. Not me.

When we were first married, MIL will tell him to go home to collect some dessert she has cooked. But only 1 portion, for him. Reason being, she dunno if I will eat.

When we go out with PILs, MIL will link her arm through DH's and walk with him leaving me to trail behind them. I was so tempted to link my arms through FIL's and walk with him just to irritate her.

When I was first preggy with DD, DH was ecstatic and the 1st person he told was his mummy dearest. And she told him still so early no need to be so happy.

When we found out that the triple test showed that DD fall within the high risk range for downs. She said there told you too early to be happy. Just abort lah. Can try again.

When confronted about some of the hurtful things she says, she will start crying say she low level education, dunno how to talk so offend people. Then start saying that she this lao ren jia apologise to us wan bei, blah blah blah. Like that win oredi loh. What can we say, she pull the rank card on us oredi.

Aiyoh, so many more incidents over the years that now these are trivial stuff oredi. In one ear out the other and shut both eyes. So peace on earth now.

[buds]

tree nymph:

then come the episode of caning...

tree nymph:

what kind of grandma will force the mother to use this method to extract one lousy 'ah mah'? and this grandma is an highly educated one somemore! even the old cleaning lady cleaning the toilet in my office building also understand that toddlers have their moments and that it is not fair to displicine them like that. just for one lousy 'ah mah'... this is the very first time i use cane on my little boy. and it felt like raining canes on myself...

Tree nymph... i read this with much sadness cos i understand how you
feel. I'm sure this episode will stick on you for a loooonnng time... The
guilt is too much to bear. But with this episode alone, i believe you shud
be stronger now for your boy... now much much bigger i assume who i
silently think feels what you feel. I try to avoid heavy discipline matters
to be controlled by MIL. My usual way is just quickly pick my girls up
and walk into the room... quickly! And shut the door behind us! She will
bitch about my behaviour outside, kua kua kua kua chiao... and she'll
fade out once she is tired and gets no response. Of course, only to do
it again lah... :roll: ... sickening but what to do. I want to hold out as
much as possible to \"ren\" so since i'm only within the walls of the house
that is as best i can do.

She scolds me outwardly when i let hubs discipline the kids. She calls it
irresponsible of a mother not to protect her own children. She told me
off saying i should stop whatever i'm doing whether it's washing dishes
or cooking or whatever... just out it all down and go save my kids.

I'm like... :whut:

Save my kids? Rescue them from like what? Danger?
He's only using loud voice tactic. Yell at the kids... and likewise for when
i'm disciplining my girls, hubs doesn't interfere either. If it's a moment
where my kiddies lives are in total danger from their own daddy... yeah
i WILL be there awrite... but for peanuts, i just go blah..

Once, hubs was scolding DD2 (again voice tactic nia)... she came hurriedly
out and reprimanded him openly in front of all of us... At that moment,
in my heart i went... uh-oh... i wouldn't do that if i were her. True enuf,
he hollered, \"If you dun like what you see, go into your room! You dun
like what you hear, cover your ears... but when i'm disciplining MY daughter
please stay the hell out of my way! What're waiting for!!\"

And that was one voice tactic even i shuddered..

Since then... waaaayyy less interference.

See? When we do it nicely, politely, soft-soft dowan to accept...
I eat more salt... i eat more rice... everything more... Skali kena
holler one time, become mouse. I have never seen hubs sooo angry. :siam:
With her la i mean.. :roll:

With me, a lot of times liao.

[auntieM]

Wow Buds, really salute your 'ren'.... What does MILs wants to achieve when they do this to their family?