How do you deal with arrogant/how lian people around you?
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Hm... Janet, then I guess it boils down to priority. If those vocab, english books are more important than play, then parents should do those, plus tuition plus everything else rather than have the kids enjoy their childhood.
I guess, for this year, I have agreed with my kids that we'll have a lot of time doing nothing. There'll be no tuition for anyone, we'll have swimming alternate days, and we'll go out and eat more often, we'll bake together (our next project is bak kwa since it is so expensive these days) and we'll build a few new robots together.
I find that my kids are happier and learn a lot better at school this way. Today, I also had a meeting with the MOE EP, he told me that children must have a hobby they can excel and have fun with to relax and feel good about. I guess this year will be that.
Yep, PSLE results will be lower than what they could have been, but if they get to the school they want, that's all I care. Nobody will remember the PSLE results, anyway. At the end of the day, I want my children to remember their childhood as being a happy one, not one filled with work.
I guess, to each his own. And, today, I managed to get some endorsement from a few parties to carry on, because there are times I wonder if I am doing the right thing.
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I agree with 2ppaamm.
My girl is in P1 now, she almost have no homework from school. I have only bought her one Chinese assessment book. She does not have any tuition or enrichment classes except her piano class.
I don't believe in using assessment books to teach. I believe in reading as widely as possible. My homework for her is to read Matilda by Roald Dahl, which she enjoys very much, and also to read a few pages from a Chinese chapter book. After that she has a lot of time to do whatever she likes. She loves to draw and do paper craft. She likes to bake cupcakes, make her own jewelery, and now I am teaching her how to sew cloth bags.
Parents need to know the right method to use, and not just keep stuffing kids with assessment books. In fact, I looked at the some of the assessment books, and I am surprised at how badly written some of these books are. Kids should learn by reading good books written by the great authors, not by doing assessment books. My girl has learned far more vocabulary, better grammar and comprehension, as well as general knowledge by reading all the wonderful children's classics, and more importantly, she has a lot of fun in reading these books
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Hugs to you guys, Tutormom and Autumnbronze. You have taken on a moral burden that is beyond your call of duty. You guys gladly do it, but it is heavy.
What is quite true is that children especially as they grow up, will need role models and mentors, whether from within the family or not. Teachers and tutors often fulfill this role because of the position of authority, and if they have empathy for the child, it is easy to see how the relationship can develop.
BUT, no ousider should be the rock of a child's emotional life. I really can't understand why parents would relinquish this role ... Yes, parenting is hard, but giving up is completely unthinkable.
I saw this ad in a parenting talk and it brought tears to my eyes. I don't want to be thinking these things when my time is up.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1hu7ZBHAqs -
Blobbi:
I just saw the commercial. This is so so sad and it brought tears to my eyes too.
BUT, no ousider should be the rock of a child's emotional life. I really can't understand why parents would relinquish this role ... Yes, parenting is hard, but giving up is completely unthinkable.
I saw this ad in a parenting talk and it brought tears to my eyes. I don't want to be thinking these things when my time is up.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1hu7ZBHAqs
It's a good reminder to never end the day or leave the house angry with our loved ones.
Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks for posting the commercial. How true. Sometimes, we just forget that our time is just limited with our kids. Every time I bid goodbye to my kids as I see them walking to the hall for assembly, this ABBA song will play in my heart:
Here's the youtube video (used to watch this one everyday for a whole year when I was in sec school) :D:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNaNVuWes_U
Schoolbag in hand, she leaves home in the early morning
Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile
I watch her go with a surge of that well-known sadness
And I have to sit down for a while
The feeling that I'm losing her forever
And without really entering her world
I'm glad whenever I can share her laughter
That funny little girl
Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Sleep in our eyes, her and me at the breakfast table
Barely awake, I let precious time go by
Then when she's gone there's that odd melancholy feeling
And a sense of guilt I can't deny
What happened to the wonderful adventures
The places I had planned for us to go
(Slipping through my fingers all the time)
Well, some of that we did but most we didn't
And why I just don't know
Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture
And save it from the funny tricks of time
Slipping through my fingers
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Schoolbag in hand she leaves home in the early morning
Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile -
tamarind:
Wow! I admire your way of teaching... keep at it! I'm sure your daughter will grow up a very happy child.I agree with 2ppaamm.
My girl is in P1 now, she almost have no homework from school. I have only bought her one Chinese assessment book. She does not have any tuition or enrichment classes except her piano class.
I don't believe in using assessment books to teach. I believe in reading as widely as possible. My homework for her is to read Matilda by Roald Dahl, which she enjoys very much, and also to read a few pages from a Chinese chapter book. After that she has a lot of time to do whatever she likes. She loves to draw and do paper craft. She likes to bake cupcakes, make her own jewelery, and now I am teaching her how to sew cloth bags.
Parents need to know the right method to use, and not just keep stuffing kids with assessment books. In fact, I looked at the some of the assessment books, and I am surprised at how badly written some of these books are. Kids should learn by reading good books written by the great authors, not by doing assessment books. My girl has learned far more vocabulary, better grammar and comprehension, as well as general knowledge by reading all the wonderful children's classics, and more importantly, she has a lot of fun in reading these books -
Blobbi:
THANK YOU Blobbi, for sharing this clip. IT brought tears to my eyes too, though the v last bit about the insurance was an anti-climax :roll: Didn't anticipate thatHugs to you guys, Tutormom and Autumnbronze. You have taken on a moral burden that is beyond your call of duty. You guys gladly do it, but it is heavy.
What is quite true is that children especially as they grow up, will need role models and mentors, whether from within the family or not. Teachers and tutors often fulfill this role because of the position of authority, and if they have empathy for the child, it is easy to see how the relationship can develop.
BUT, no ousider should be the rock of a child's emotional life. I really can't understand why parents would relinquish this role ... Yes, parenting is hard, but giving up is completely unthinkable.
I saw this ad in a parenting talk and it brought tears to my eyes. I don't want to be thinking these things when my time is up.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1hu7ZBHAqs
If you don't mind me saying, I view it as a moral 'responsibility'. One other reason is also because I did not come from a nurturing family backgrd. Its left a huge impact on me. What I am today ie qualifications, achievements etc... is sad and not so sad (if you know what I mean) largely due to me, DH and ILs. The emotional stability I did not get at home, I instead got it unconditionally from DH.
Its a miracle that I always had this sense of how shd I say it, \"righteousness\" that prevented me from indulging in stuff during my teens/impressionable years. So, when my peers were experimenting, I chose not to. Its also a god-send that I met my DH when I was 19 2ppaamm:
2ppaam,Thanks for posting the commercial. How true. Sometimes, we just forget that our time is just limited with our kids. Every time I bid goodbye to my kids as I see them walking to the hall for assembly, this ABBA song will play in my heart:
Here's the youtube video (used to watch this one everyday for a whole year when I was in sec school) :D:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNaNVuWes_U
Schoolbag in hand, she leaves home in the early morning
Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile
I watch her go with a surge of that well-known sadness
And I have to sit down for a while
The feeling that I'm losing her forever
And without really entering her world
I'm glad whenever I can share her laughter
That funny little girl
Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Sleep in our eyes, her and me at the breakfast table
Barely awake, I let precious time go by
Then when she's gone there's that odd melancholy feeling
And a sense of guilt I can't deny
What happened to the wonderful adventures
The places I had planned for us to go
(Slipping through my fingers all the time)
Well, some of that we did but most we didn't
And why I just don't know
Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture
And save it from the funny tricks of time
Slipping through my fingers
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Schoolbag in hand she leaves home in the early morning
Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile
Aiyoh, tears again lah .... somemore not even suffering from PMS
Thank you for sharing. Actually am an ABBA fan. Have their DVD and CD. Must go check if I have the song cuz I really can't remember ever hearing this song :oops: :oops: -
autumnbronze:
And there will be many amongst our children who will not come from nurturing families simply because their parents have to work, make a living, or they simply come from broken homes. Our kids are blessed in their ways.If you don't mind me saying, I view it as a moral 'responsibility'. One other reason is also because I did not come from a nurturing family backgrd. Its left a huge impact on me. What I am today ie qualifications, achievements etc... is sad and not so sad (if you know what I mean) largely due to me, DH and ILs. The emotional stability I did not get at home, I instead got it unconditionally from DH.
Its a miracle that I always had this sense of how shd I say it, \"righteousness\" that prevented me from indulging in stuff during my teens/impressionable years. So, when my peers were experimenting, I chose not to. Its also a god-send that I met my DH when I was 19
I am also one who benefited from DH's kindness and stability. It is now my responsibility to nurture a few more good lives in my children, so that they in turn will help their spouses and create good families. That's one of the wishes I have for my children. My little contribution to this already corrupted world... -
True, Autumnbronze, moral responsibility is a better word.
2ppaamm, so true. I'm too idealistic sometimes ... -
Blobbi:
So you see, many of us give up our careers or put our careers at a standstill nurturing a family is NOT wasting anything. In fact, we are building something so important that many policy makers fail to see. We are nurturing the next generation of leaders who are stable, trust worthy and reliable. Not just walking calculators.True, Autumnbronze, moral responsibility is a better word.
2ppaamm, so true. I'm too idealistic sometimes ...
Actually gahmen should really look into this rather than encouraging more and more women to work, and less and less children being nurtured properly...
Oops, do I sound how lian now? :roll:
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