All About Autism
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Not sure if this guide may help?
A 7-step Plan To Help Your Child Heal And Recover
http://tinyurl.com/ReversingAutism
http://tinyurl.com/ReversingAutism -
scang:
I have serious doubts about any claims to reverse or cure or heal autism. I note that this author then says in her further description that her steps reverse the symptoms of autism. This is something that all therapies hope to do. There is a difference between reversing the symptoms and actually reversing autism itself. I can only say - reader beware.Not sure if this guide may help?
A 7-step Plan To Help Your Child Heal And Recover
http://tinyurl.com/ReversingAutism
http://tinyurl.com/ReversingAutism -
Hi mommies,
It seems to me that I have the youngest kid in this forum. DS is 2 yrs 4 months old now. I like to ask some questions to the strong mommies here.
I read in the old posts that most psychologists (private and Govt) don’t advocate getting the full 3-4 assessment until the child turns 3-4. But all advocate doing early intervention in the meantime to address the child’s weaknesses.
For my son’s case, he started OT/ST when he was 22 months old when the word ‘suspected ASD’ came up. For the past 6 months, my emotions are in a yo-yo stage. I have ‘dark’ thoughts about myself and my son, get angry easily, cried sometimes while looking at my son. There was 1 incident during an ST session, my son looked at me and smiled and I just smiled blandly at him. The ST caught it and said he was doing social referencing (which is a good sign) but why did I looked so ‘detached’? I told her I am tormented daily. I wanted to get my son formally diagnosed so that I can have an answer. But yet if I tested him too early, if it turns out to be ASD, will I be fully convinced by the test results and accept it? I know thru my research that it is still acceptable to parallel-play between 2-3 years old, thus 3.5 years old is a good age to test because if the child is just delayed, his/her social skills should emerge by then. So I live my life daily in a detached mode, I feel that I am just living, neither happy nor sad. I am consumed by the ‘does he, does he not?’ Question. I read up and realized that inconsistency is the hallmark for all neurological disorders (ASD, SID, ADHD etc).
Mommies, does it comes a point of time when we are no longer bothered by the ‘problem’? Will time help? Is my quest for a label just part of the grieving process? Did having a diagnosis give you ‘closure’ and allows you to move on? Or without the formal diagnosis, we will always harbour some hope in us that it is not ASD? I am lost. -
Couragemom:
Even after you get a diagnosis, you will still wonder if they made a wrong diagnosis. Don't keep looking at a diagnosis. It just provides a label. Yes, in some ways it is closure, an affirmation that what we thought all along turned out right but it can also cause us much grief.Hi mommies,
It seems to me that I have the youngest kid in this forum. DS is 2 yrs 4 months old now. I like to ask some questions to the strong mommies here.
I read in the old posts that most psychologists (private and Govt) don't advocate getting the full 3-4 assessment until the child turns 3-4. But all advocate doing early intervention in the meantime to address the child's weaknesses.
For my son's case, he started OT/ST when he was 22 months old when the word 'suspected ASD' came up. For the past 6 months, my emotions are in a yo-yo stage. I have 'dark' thoughts about myself and my son, get angry easily, cried sometimes while looking at my son. There was 1 incident during an ST session, my son looked at me and smiled and I just smiled blandly at him. The ST caught it and said he was doing social referencing (which is a good sign) but why did I looked so 'detached'? I told her I am tormented daily. I wanted to get my son formally diagnosed so that I can have an answer. But yet if I tested him too early, if it turns out to be ASD, will I be fully convinced by the test results and accept it? I know thru my research that it is still acceptable to parallel-play between 2-3 years old, thus 3.5 years old is a good age to test because if the child is just delayed, his/her social skills should emerge by then. So I live my life daily in a detached mode, I feel that I am just living, neither happy nor sad. I am consumed by the 'does he, does he not?' Question. I read up and realized that inconsistency is the hallmark for all neurological disorders (ASD, SID, ADHD etc).
Mommies, does it comes a point of time when we are no longer bothered by the 'problem'? Will time help? Is my quest for a label just part of the grieving process? Did having a diagnosis give you 'closure' and allows you to move on? Or without the formal diagnosis, we will always harbour some hope in us that it is not ASD? I am lost.
Don't keep wondering if he is asd or not. Focus on the small things and work slowly. Smile to him when he smiles at you. A detached mom is worse for him while an engaged mom can bring him out from his shell. If it helps, perhaps u may wanna see a psychologist yourself. Pp here has this thing against psychologist. But if you have difficulty coping mentally, it is a good way to find someone to talk to.
I was reading this book \"The spark\" by Kristine Barnett. Her son has autism but he is also the famous boy who may be on the way to getting a Nobel prize. The struggles she had and what she did to help her son become the genius he is now is really inspiring. When her son was first diagnosed, the doctors said he wouldn't be able to speak or read in his life! If you have time, read it. She also runs a centre for special needs children including autistic kids. So even when the drs said those children have no hope, she managed to help them move beyond expectations.
Just take one step each time. He is still so young. There is a lot of potential that u can unleash in him. I know it is easier said than done. Some days are good, somedays you just felt like you are in hell. It will get better. He will eventually play with someone instead of parallel play. He will learn to ask and converse with someone. He will have a friend.
Just like walking, who cares when you started walking when you were young? Does it matter that you walked at 8months or walked at 2 years old? So long as we walk, it doesn't matter when you started doing it. Your child is just concentrating on other skills right now that aren't conventional. -
Your son is too young for a formal diagnosis, in my opinion. If it’s mild enough that they can’t give your a conclusive answer, then there is a possibility that the symptoms are just part of his normal pattern of growth which is different from the typical. Too-early diagnosis can turn out to be wrong and cause a lot of unnecessary upset and treatment. Even if it later turns out that he has ASD, what difference does it make? He is still your son, and you are still his mother. He is still going to need you to help him learn, grow and cope with the world, whether he is ASD or not.
I was the opposite of you. I did notice a few ‘oddities’ in my daughter even as a toddler, but I didn’t try to get a diagnosis. In fact, even though we self-diagnosed her to be Asperger’s when she was about 6yo, we didn’t take her for a formal diagnosis till she was 14yo (and were proved correct). We had been overseas all her school life, so didn’t need a formal diagnosis as her school was willing to take our word for it and cope with her. But Singapore schools are not so accommodating without a formal report, so we got the diagnosis and informed her teachers here so they could cut her a bit of slack if necessary.
What I did was deal with every ‘symptom’ as it came up - taught her to look people in the face, taught her to greet and answer simple questions, taught her to play alongside other kids, taught her the required manners and social behaviour etc. She never really liked interacting with other kids, and other mothers could see that she was a bit of a loner and liked to do her own thing, even at 1yo! I just treated her like any other kid - talked to her, played with her, taught her whatever seemed to be right ‘next thing’ for her etc, but addressed her particular issues as we went along. Actually, what we found hardest to deal with were the non-ASD traits - poor motor skills, slow processing speed, auditory processing issues. The ASD traits just meant that she was less cooperative because she didn’t see the need to try to work with us, and less able to explain to teachers and friends that she was finding something tough.
What I did was read up what I could about coping with a ‘different’ child and how to teach her what she needed to know at each stage (therapy sounds like it needs to be professional, but really, a good book and common sense is what is mostly needed unless the deficits are really severe). I didn’t see that a label would be useful as every child, even with the same label, manifests differently. I believe that you should do the same with your son. Forget trying to get a label (unless you need it to get into a school or whatever later on) and just work on helping him learn the things he needs to learn now. He may always be different from the norm, he may learn some things later than the norm, but it’s OK to be different as long as he can cope with normal life on his terms.
Just my thoughts and a different perspective. -
Kristine Barnett
http://m.theglobeandmail.com/life/paren ... ice=mobile -
slmkhoo:
I call this creative wording, or smart marketing by the author or the marketing team.
I have serious doubts about any claims to reverse or cure or heal autism. I note that this author then says in her further description that her steps reverse the symptoms of autism. This is something that all therapies hope to do. There is a difference between reversing the symptoms and actually reversing autism itself. I can only say - reader beware.scang:
Not sure if this guide may help?
A 7-step Plan To Help Your Child Heal And Recover
http://tinyurl.com/ReversingAutism
http://tinyurl.com/ReversingAutism
What is important is the content and technique used and are they effective, rather than simply the title or words. -
slmkhoo:
Yes, totally agreed with slmkhoo.Your son is too young for a formal diagnosis, in my opinion. If it's mild enough that they can't give your a conclusive answer, then there is a possibility that the symptoms are just part of his normal pattern of growth which is different from the typical. Too-early diagnosis can turn out to be wrong and cause a lot of unnecessary upset and treatment. Even if it later turns out that he has ASD, what difference does it make? He is still your son, and you are still his mother. He is still going to need you to help him learn, grow and cope with the world, whether he is ASD or not.
I was the opposite of you. I did notice a few 'oddities' in my daughter even as a toddler, but I didn't try to get a diagnosis. In fact, even though we self-diagnosed her to be Asperger's when she was about 6yo, we didn't take her for a formal diagnosis till she was 14yo (and were proved correct). We had been overseas all her school life, so didn't need a formal diagnosis as her school was willing to take our word for it and cope with her. But Singapore schools are not so accommodating without a formal report, so we got the diagnosis and informed her teachers here so they could cut her a bit of slack if necessary.
What I did was deal with every 'symptom' as it came up - taught her to look people in the face, taught her to greet and answer simple questions, taught her to play alongside other kids, taught her the required manners and social behaviour etc. She never really liked interacting with other kids, and other mothers could see that she was a bit of a loner and liked to do her own thing, even at 1yo! I just treated her like any other kid - talked to her, played with her, taught her whatever seemed to be right 'next thing' for her etc, but addressed her particular issues as we went along. Actually, what we found hardest to deal with were the non-ASD traits - poor motor skills, slow processing speed, auditory processing issues. The ASD traits just meant that she was less cooperative because she didn't see the need to try to work with us, and less able to explain to teachers and friends that she was finding something tough.
What I did was read up what I could about coping with a 'different' child and how to teach her what she needed to know at each stage (therapy sounds like it needs to be professional, but really, a good book and common sense is what is mostly needed unless the deficits are really severe). I didn't see that a label would be useful as every child, even with the same label, manifests differently. I believe that you should do the same with your son. Forget trying to get a label (unless you need it to get into a school or whatever later on) and just work on helping him learn the things he needs to learn now. He may always be different from the norm, he may learn some things later than the norm, but it's OK to be different as long as he can cope with normal life on his terms.
Just my thoughts and a different perspective.
It seems SG loves to label people and things, but it doesn't help nor improve what is more important, which is the physical, social, psychological and emotional well being of the child. It is also this labeling that denies them insurance from most insurance company w/o premium loading.
Have a change in mindset, and work on the important aspect which is to help the child develop. Be influential and supportive in their lives, work on their talents, potentials, character, personalities, Strengths etc.
Work on Positively interacting with your child, Motivating your child, and Aiding your child in various aspect of his life. -
Hi Mashy and Simkhoo,
Thank you so vvvv much for your replies. Actually I also told myself to ‘suck it up’ and get on with life. You all are right, nothing will change the fact that I am his dearest mama and he is my very much loved and wanted second child. Actually I thought I was getting better because I started to feel more at peace with myself but this week I feel bad again. Haizz… I actually thought of seeing a psychiatrist (can prescribe medicine) but I need to be on my toes for my family. Talking to you mommies help a lot a lot as I can see that with persistence and diligent work from us, all our little ones will blossom in their own ways one day! Everyday I have this crazy wish that I have a time traveling machine to the future and all I want is a 10sec glimpse into my son’s life to see how he is as an adult to ease all the worries I have towards his future.
As ImMeeMee said, this autism journey is a marathon, not a sprint, so I can’t be in this state of mind forever or else I will let everyone down. I will monitor myself further and see how. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. -
Couragemom:
Hugs.Hi Mashy and Simkhoo,
Thank you so vvvv much for your replies. Actually I also told myself to 'suck it up' and get on with life. You all are right, nothing will change the fact that I am his dearest mama and he is my very much loved and wanted second child. Actually I thought I was getting better because I started to feel more at peace with myself but this week I feel bad again. Haizz... I actually thought of seeing a psychiatrist (can prescribe medicine) but I need to be on my toes for my family. Talking to you mommies help a lot a lot as I can see that with persistence and diligent work from us, all our little ones will blossom in their own ways one day! Everyday I have this crazy wish that I have a time traveling machine to the future and all I want is a 10sec glimpse into my son's life to see how he is as an adult to ease all the worries I have towards his future.
As ImMeeMee said, this autism journey is a marathon, not a sprint, so I can't be in this state of mind forever or else I will let everyone down. I will monitor myself further and see how. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Understand how u are feeling. I also go on an emotional roller coaster, sometimes feeling at peace, sometimes having panic attacks, sometimes feeling that he has all the signs of an nT boy.
Don't worry after his future. We can't do anything other than dealing with each issue one at a time.
Recently read about Stephen Hawkings too. If he could overcome his severe physical disability to become one of the world's greatest scientist, I'm sure ours can also overcome theirs. Even if they don't achieve that much in their lifetime, at least be a useful person and be who they want to be.
I'm trying to look at the strengths and not focus so much in his weaknesses. If they learn something they like long enough, they can be an expert in it too. Amazingly, the advantage of our kids is that immense focus they have on their interests. Once they find their interests, they learn so fast and become an expert in their own right. Even for low functioning kids, I'm sure they have things they are obsessed about.
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