All About Autism
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slmkhoo:
mashy:
My son says he will buy a house and I can stay with him! Yippee!
Even if my daughter offers this to me, I don't think I want to! It will mean that she will keep depending on me. And realistically, there will come a time when I am not around, so it's best she gets used to that when I am still available for occasional emergency rescues.
Lol. Good point. We will see how lah. Still long long way. -
mashy:
slmkhoo:
[quote=\"mashy\"]My son says he will buy a house and I can stay with him! Yippee!
Even if my daughter offers this to me, I don't think I want to! It will mean that she will keep depending on me. And realistically, there will come a time when I am not around, so it's best she gets used to that when I am still available for occasional emergency rescues.
Lol. Good point. We will see how lah. Still long long way.[/quote]
Hi Mashy,
So sweet of your son to say that! My husband and me are financially planning very hard to give our DS a roof over his head when he grows up. Don't want him to depend on his sister who will eventually marry and have her own family. I am praying hard that my son will grow up to be able to hold a job that can pay for his daily expenses and have some left over for savings. I really don't know what the standard of living in Singapore will become in 20 years. Now a bowl of fishball noodles soup cost $3, maybe 20 years down the road will become $5???? -
Couragemom:
Hi Mashy,
So sweet of your son to say that! My husband and me are financially planning very hard to give our DS a roof over his head when he grows up. Don't want him to depend on his sister who will eventually marry and have her own family. I am praying hard that my son will grow up to be able to hold a job that can pay for his daily expenses and have some left over for savings. I really don't know what the standard of living in Singapore will become in 20 years. Now a bowl of fishball noodles soup cost $3, maybe 20 years down the road will become $5????
It's already $5 in some places. Maybe $8 or $10?
I'm sure he will be able to hold a job, with such a dedicated mother like you. They are a lot better off with us to help them from young. Some aren't so lucky if their parents choose to deny it and refuse any help. -
Planning a roof for your child now??! Like seriously? Geez…
Please pardon my expression (and candidness) but from where I come from, it sounds so…how you say it…aloof?
Why the mollycoddling? What happened to self reliance? Even if a child is a special child, shouldn’t the priority be to teach him self reliance first, which ironically is inversely related to mollycoddling, IMHO. The more one mollycoddles, the less one is self reliant.
If it was me, I rather prepare to set up a Joan Bowen cafe to give my child a chance at being self reliant… than to buy a roof. It really sounds like an excuse to go out get another condo, in our property mad country. Sorry.
I dont even know how my child will turn out in 5 years, let alone 20… -
Hi tyeogh,
You flatter me lah! I am aiming for just a HDB 3 room flat, definitely not a condo! I will of course train my son to be independent in his adulthood but like what you said, you don’t know what will happen in 5 years let alone 20 years, this is just my Plan B for my son. If he is able to hold a good job and all, well… The savings will fund my around the world expenses then! grin -
My son did really badly for his Math and Science SA1, despite my coaching, tuition and hard work
Does anyone have recommendations for a gd tutor who is gd with special needs children?
TIA! -
Slmkhoo
Thank you of your words of wisdom. Sorry for replying late. I guessed I was all pent up and finding a channel to rant. Felt better and move on to continue to seek ways to help him and spend time with my other 2 kids. Making him independent is our ultimate aim as well. Making him pass psle is a enabling milestone to help him to have more choices for the next steps.
Thank you for sharing your experiences, it really provided us hope and brighten the thoughts we have for our ASD kiddos. (Am sure most moms agreed).
ImMeeMee, Double E
thanks, indeed it felt better after ranting. I guess on and off we will fall into the pithole of being frustration, self pity and unfairness mode. As much as I want to be positive, but I guess once my threshold is over, I will encounter a meltdown too. Lol
Thanks for listening and giving comforting words.
Couragemom
Yes I recv ur pm abt your psychologist. Thanks for thinking of me. Son has a tutor now plus seeing psychologist requires logistics, time and cost.. We kiv that consultation first. Son now.is attending regular OT at IMH. They are also helping to address these issue for us. Hope they will be able to show some positive impact on him.
Yes pls prep ur son for p1. I overlook this point.. Is good that we hv this forum for sharing isn't it. To.share everything
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Mashy
Thanks for sharing your experiences with me. I also always look up to you for tips esp our sons age are near both are in mainstream…
Son got quite good results for his maths! Gosh… We were so happy! Here’s a few things we did…
Yes he is competitive in nature esp to his younger sibling. Will be real mad when he lost his game. Using this trait of his competitiveness against his younger bro, I told him if he fails for everything, he has to go back k2 (Which he hates most) and stay there until his bro goes k2 then both go p1 again together. He of cos didnt want that.
Another thing i did was only if he pass his test, any one paper written , he can go for the holiday trip with us in June. If all fail, then he has to stay in Singapore cos holiday trip are reward for people who work really hard and earn it. Smart boy say if he fail and we go without him, I will end up crying cos I will be missing him! Funny to get that comment from him. But at least he knows we love him.
One more thing we did was to tell him marks need to pass. Like maths at least 13 marks so u pass. English 25 then pass. Chinese 25 then pass. So he knows he need to answer as many as possible to get more marks.
Last thing is practise and practise and practise. Cos practise makes perfect! No other shortcut way.
I haven’t seen his English and Chinese results. But I am already happy that he pass his maths. He put in effort to read and do correctly after I poured my hard work into him.
Thank you mommies for giving all suggestions and lending a listening ear. -
Yes son lately started to get interested in art and painting. And we sign him up at community center. Lol. So glad he is coping well and he wants to continue for 2nd term.
Finally I found something he likes. -
mashy:
So sweet of your boy.
My son says he will buy a house and I can stay with him! Yippee!
Sometimes when my kids get too naughty, I would something like they don't love me. Cos if they love me they won't do things that make me upset and one day I might be so heartbroken that I will just die. And the way they behave right now.. Very soon i will die then they have no more mummy. .. (More for my no 2 cos he takes soft approach)
Then son will say \"no no I don't want mummy to die so fast. I want mummy to die so slow\". HB laugh so loud cos sounded like slow death. But at least I know my son even though ASD but he loves me enough to want me to live longer..
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